Someone screamed and I jumped, almost dropping the plates in my hands. I quickly put them down on the table next to me. Then I ran over to where Mercy lay motionless. As I knelt down to make sure she was all right, voices exploded behind me. Noah hurried over and sank to his knees beside me.
“What did she say? Did she say someone was dead?”
I brushed back a couple of dark-red curls that had escaped from under Mercy’s prayer covering. Her forehead was damp with sweat, yet it was freezing cold outside. “Help me get her cloak off,” I said to Noah. “She’s too hot.” Together we held her up while we removed her heavy cape. I pulled her into my lap. “Can someone get me a cool damp rag?” I asked loudly. Noah started to get up, but then I heard Lizzie’s voice from behind us.
“I’ll get it.”
I turned my head and watched her jog toward the kitchen.
“Mercy?” I said softly, turning my attention back to the unconscious teenager, “are you all right? Can you hear me?”
Her eyelids fluttered several times and then slowly opened. The confusion on her face was also reflected in her eyes. “What . . . what happened?”
As I helped her sit up, she gazed around, obviously frightened by the crowd gathered around her.
“You said you found a dead woman on the road?” I tried to say it delicately, but there really wasn’t any way to sugarcoat it.
She nodded, her eyes wide with shock and fear. “Yes.”
“On the road to Kingdom?” Noah asked.
“Yes, Elder.” Tears slipped down her cheeks.
“What were you doing out there?” I asked. Normally children went straight home after school. Mercy was supposed to go to her father’s hardware store. For her to be out on the road was highly unusual.
“Max, our cat, didn’t come home last night. I was trying to find him.” Her voice broke. “Where is my papa?”
“He was here a little while ago,” Noah said. “He must have gone back to the store.” He searched the room until he caught sight of Jonathon, who stood nearby. “Jonathon, can you go to the hardware store and fetch Harold? And find my brother. He should be at the church.”
Jonathon didn’t take time to answer, just hurried out the front door.
Noah stood to his feet. “This woman,” he said to Mercy in a somber voice, “how far away is she?”
Mercy wiped her wet face with her sleeve. “About halfway between here and the main road outside of town.”
“Okay.” Noah looked around the room. “Ebbie, will you come with me? We need to—”
“I don’t know what you’re planning to do,” Lizzie interjected, as she came back into the room, “but don’t touch anything and don’t get too near the body.” She handed me a damp rag. “The sheriff will want the scene to stay undisturbed, in case her death wasn’t an accident. You know, for clues.” She turned around and quickly headed back to the kitchen.
“It’s not an accident,” Mercy said to me, her voice shaking with emotion. “Someone . . . someone put her there.” Her sky-blue eyes sought mine, and she leaned in close to me. “She’s wrapped up in plastic,” she whispered.
Had the serial killer the sheriff was looking for come to Kingdom? The possibility made me catch my breath, and I felt sick to my stomach. I tried to comfort Mercy the best I could while we waited for her father.
A few minutes later Harold Eberly rushed into the dining room. “Mercy!” he cried. Jonathon and Levi trailed behind him.
I helped the young girl to her feet, and her father took her from me, holding her up as she leaned against him. Together they walked slowly toward the front door. Several people started to follow them.
“Wait a minute,” Levi called out. His face was so pale it frightened me. Obviously Jonathon had told him what had happened. Everyone stopped in their tracks and looked back at their pastor.
“You all must stay in town. The last thing we need is a bunch of people gawking at this unfortunate woman. It’s not . . . decent. Let’s show some respect.”
Although no one acknowledged that they were headed to check out the place Mercy had described, a few of them looked decidedly guilty. But everyone seemed to agree with Levi’s warning. The idea of people staring at the woman’s body seemed so invasive. A shudder of something cold and ghastly slithered down my spine. This is Kingdom. How could something like this happen? I started to tell Levi what Mercy had whispered to me, but I remembered that Noah said it was a detail the authorities were keeping to themselves. If I told him now, it was possible someone in the room might hear. I decided to wait until we were alone.
“Let’s get going,” Levi said to Ebbie and Jonathon. “I’m fairly certain Mercy saw what she said she did, but before we call the sheriff, I think we need to make absolutely sure. What if she’s wrong?”
I felt pretty confident that Lizzie had already notified Sheriff Timmons, but not wanting to cause any further disturbance, I kept quiet.
“I understand,” Ebbie said, his dark-brown eyes troubled, “but I have to admit this is something I really don’t want to see.”
“Don’t you think I feel the same way?” Jonathon asked sharply. “But Levi’s right. Let’s make sure before we stir up trouble we don’t need.”
“I’m going,” Noah said.
Levi shook his head. “Why don’t you stay here, Brother? I don’t want people wandering out onto the road out of curiosity. You can keep an eye on those here and offer reassurance as needed.”
I could tell Noah was torn between wanting to go with Levi and his friends, and his obligation to those of us who were terrified by Mercy’s revelation. But he nodded slowly, ready to support Levi’s decision.
Ebbie stood to his feet, still holding Hope’s hand. “I’ll be back soon,” he told her gently. “Pray for us.”
Her eyes filled with tears. “I will. Take care, Husband.”
Levi glanced over at me. At this point, all he knew was that there was probably a body lying on the road to Kingdom. Even though no one had said the woman’s death was the result of a serial killer, everyone who had listened to the sheriff earlier in the day surely suspected it. I was probably the only person who was almost certain of it.
The look in Levi’s eyes made it clear that he dreaded what awaited him. I wanted to hug him. Tell him everything would be all right. But to be honest, I wasn’t sure it was the truth. Right now, all I could do was pray it was someone we didn’t know. That sounded awful. Shallow and selfish. This was someone’s daughter, sister, maybe even a wife and mother. But the idea that she could be a stranger somehow made the situation easier to endure. We’d had to say good-bye to so many friends and family lately. Besides Papa, we’d lost Avery Menninger and Frances Lapp. Although Pastor Mendenhall hadn’t died, his leaving had almost felt like a death. And then there was Sophie Wittenbauer. No one really talked about her departure because of her harmful actions toward our town, but I felt sorry for her and kept her in my daily prayers. Her absence still hurt.
Who could the dead woman be? Unbidden, names and faces flooded my mind. Who hadn’t I seen this morning? Who was missing? Suddenly one face floated into my thoughts. “Leah,” I whispered, cold fear seizing my body. She usually came in for a cup of coffee after school let out, but she hadn’t been in today. “Where is Leah?” I asked loudly, my voice trembling.
The silence in the empty room came back to me like an echo of terror. Then a voice from behind me made me jump. Lizzie had come back into the room.
“It’s not Leah, Callie. I took food over to the school at lunchtime. She told me she had to stay late with one of the children and wouldn’t be by today. I’m sure she’s still there. Besides, Mercy would have recognized Leah.”
Relief flowed through me. “You’re right. I didn’t think of that. Thank you, God.”
Lizzie looked around the room, frowning. “Where did everyone go?”
“Levi, Ebbie, and Jonathon went out to make sure Mercy actually saw what she says she did,” Noah replied. “I think a lot of people are hanging out in town to wait for the news they bring back. If Mercy’s right, Levi will call the sheriff when he returns.”
Lizzie folded her arms across her chest. “Well, it’s too late for that.”
“Lizzie!” Noah exclaimed. “Why didn’t you check with Levi before you made that call?”
She scowled at him. “Well, let me see. Possibly because I still have my own mind and can make a few of my own decisions.”
The look Noah gave her seemed to reduce some of her bluster, and she dropped her arms to her side. “Sorry, but it was the right thing to do. The sheriff needs to get to the scene as quickly as possible. I hope no one touches anything they shouldn’t.”
“We shouldn’t jump to the conclusion that this woman’s death is connected to the man the sheriff talked about this morning,” Noah said.
I motioned to both of them to follow me over to the corner of the room. I couldn’t take a chance that anyone could hear me.
“Mercy told me . . .” A wave of nausea hit me, and I balked.
“Told you what, Callie?” Lizzie said, frowning.
I took a deep breath and tried again. “Mercy told me that the woman was wrapped in plastic.”
Noah and Lizzie were silent for several moments.
“Oh no,” Noah said finally. “God help us.”
“Then it’s even more important that the men don’t disturb the scene,” Lizzie said firmly.
“I can guarantee you no one will touch anything,” I said. “They took your advice to heart. Besides, they were all very upset, and no one really wanted to go. I’m sure none of them plan to get any closer than they have to.”
Lizzie nodded. “I don’t blame them.” She cocked her head to the side and stared at her husband. “Why are you still here?”
He raised his voice to a more normal level. “According to my brother, I’m supposed to keep everyone corralled in town and off the road. Oh, and to provide counsel to anyone who might need it.”
Lizzie grunted as she gazed around the room. The only people remaining were Noah, Hope, Lizzie, me, and John Lapp. John shook his head and stood up. John was a tall, thin man with dark hair, dark eyes, and an even darker expression. I couldn’t actually remember ever seeing him smile.
“You do not need to counsel me,” he said, staring at Noah. His deep voice always made me uncomfortable. No matter what John said, a note of menace seemed to creep into each word. “This is just one more sign of the evil that has been allowed to permeate this town. When the door is opened, the devil will dance in.”
“Brother John,” Noah said firmly, “this isn’t the time for you to air your grievances with the direction the church is taking. Whatever happened to this poor woman had nothing to do with us.”
John’s expression turned toxic. “If the church was doing what was right, violence wouldn’t hover so close to our doors.”
Noah shook his head. “Kingdom is fine, John. Except for some residents who judge everyone but themselves. A woman may be dead. Why don’t you spend your time praying for her family instead of spewing poison?”
John’s pale face grew red. “I do not spew poison, Elder Housler.” He winced as if the use of the title caused him physical pain. “What I give you is truth. It is up to you as to whether or not you accept it. God will judge between us.”
Noah kept quiet as John put on his coat and left, but I could see the muscles in his jaws work in frustration.
“Ever since Frances died, that man has gotten more judgmental,” Lizzie said. “They both rejected me when I got pregnant with Charity, but after coming back to Kingdom, we’d actually become civil with each other. Then Frances died. Now John barely acknowledges my presence.”
“I’m sure he’s grieving,” I said. “He and Frances were together almost twenty years.”
“Frances wasn’t much nicer than John,” Noah said with a sigh. “But she seemed to keep him in check. God help us all now that her steadying hand is gone.”
Lizzie frowned at the front window and watched as John walked past. “John lives out of town,” she said slowly. “He has to use the main road.”
Noah stood to his feet. “I didn’t think of that. Surely he’ll wait until Levi comes back. He was right here when Levi told everyone to stay put.”
“Are you kidding?” Lizzie said. “John Lapp doesn’t listen to anyone.”
“Maybe you should go after him, Noah,” I said. “If you can catch him . . .”
Noah hurried over to the window. “He’s already on his way. I think it might be better if I just make sure no one decides to follow him.”
He grabbed his coat off the rack and walked out the front door. I looked outside to see what was happening. Hope got up and joined me at the window. Snow was still falling, but it was a little lighter.
“I wouldn’t worry, Callie,” Hope said gently. “Levi, Ebbie, and Jonathon will turn anyone back who tries to get past them.”
“Not John. Telling him what to do only makes him angry. Especially if it’s coming from Levi. John hates him.”
“Oh, Callie. John doesn’t hate Levi. Maybe he thinks Levi’s too young to be our pastor, but everyone respects him. It’s impossible not to. Levi is one of the best men I’ve ever known. We couldn’t have a better pastor.”
I looked into her almost violet eyes. Maybe outer beauty wasn’t important, but Hope was certainly blessed with it. Her hair was so blond it was nearly white, and her skin was flawless. I found myself involuntarily reaching up and trying to push my wayward curls back where they belonged.
“I believe that too, Hope,” I said. “But not everyone in town feels the way we do. Obviously John Lapp is one who doesn’t.”
“That’s just John’s way. He never listened to Pastor Mendenhall either. You can’t judge him by the way he acts. It’s his nature to be cantankerous.”
We watched Noah talking to a group of people standing outside. They all seemed to be looking in the same direction—the way John had gone. A couple of them pointed toward the road. I couldn’t hear Noah, but after a couple of minutes, their heads began to nod, and the entire group turned and began to walk toward the restaurant.
“Looks like we’ll need some coffee,” I said. I reached out and touched Hope’s shoulder. “Thank you. You’ve made me feel better. I’m so glad Levi has your support.”
Hope put her hand on mine. “You have my support as well, Callie. Never forget that. We’re family, and we always will be.”
The events of the day had stirred up my emotions and tears filled my eyes. “Thank you. That’s the way I see it, but sometimes I’m not sure everyone else does.”
Hope started to reply, but suddenly the front door opened and people began to file in. I left Hope and hurried to the kitchen to get coffee cups and coffee. There was no reason to ask if anyone wanted it. Chapped red faces told the story. I came back with two pots of steaming hot coffee. Hope took one of the pots and served one half of the room while I took care of the rest. The coffee was gratefully accepted by everyone.
After every person had been served, I joined Noah at a table in the corner near the fireplace. “I . . . I can hardly believe what’s happened today,” I said, collapsing into a chair. I felt as if my legs couldn’t hold me up any longer even though I wasn’t physically tired. “Why is it every time I think life has finally straightened out in this town, something happens to stir the pot?”
Noah snorted. “Because the devil doesn’t sleep, Callie. Unfortunately, we’re in a fight with an enemy who won’t admit he’s already defeated.”
John’s words came back to me: “When the door is opened, the devil will dance in.”
Lizzie came over and sat down next to me. “The important thing to remember is that we have God on our side,” she said gently. “When you understand how much He loves us, and that He’ll never leave us or forsake us, we can face anything with confidence.”
Lizzie’s words brought me a measure of reassurance. God had never let us down, even in the face of an unforeseeable enemy. Although we couldn’t always predict the devil’s attacks, God was never unprepared to help us.
After giving me a hug, Lizzie stood to her feet and stared toward the window. “I wonder how long they’ll be.”
“I don’t know,” Noah answered. “It depends on whether or not the sheriff gets there before they leave. It could take a lot longer if he questions them.”
Lizzie sighed and went over to talk to Hope, who was looking out the window too.
“Why would he question them?” I asked Noah. “None of them know anything about this.”
“The sheriff doesn’t know that, Callie. If the dead woman was murdered, Sheriff Timmons will want to talk to almost everyone in Kingdom.”
“No one who lives here killed that woman,” I said, unable to keep my voice steady. “There are no murderers here.”
Noah sighed and shook his head. “As an elder I’ve heard things in counseling that shocked me. The devil is the same all over the world. Maybe we’ve limited the ways he can attack us by removing some of his favorite tools, but temptation and sin will find other ways inside if a heart is open to them.”
His grave pronouncement made me shiver. “Maybe so, but no one in Kingdom would do something like this.”
Noah smiled. “I didn’t mean to upset you, Callie. Most of the people in Kingdom are good people.”
I wanted to feel assured by his words, but I didn’t. What kind of stories was he hearing in counseling? With a shock I realized that Levi had to be privy to the same information, but he’d never mentioned anything he heard during his personal sessions with church members. “Levi hasn’t told me anything troubling about our friends and neighbors.”
“And he won’t. Whatever is said during counseling is private. Not to be repeated to anyone. You know that.”
I started to reply when Lizzie came back to the table. “I wonder how the KBI will react to us. I doubt they have much interaction with towns like ours.”
“The KBI?” I repeated. “I remember Sheriff Timmons mentioning them, but I don’t remember who they are.”
“The Kansas Bureau of Investigation,” Lizzie said. “Like the FBI, only in our state.”
I was too embarrassed to ask what the initials FBI stood for, so I just nodded. There certainly had been a lot of initials thrown around today. KBI, FBI, DNA. Seemed to me that living in the world came with its own odd language. One I didn’t know how to interpret. Lizzie’s time away from Kingdom had obviously afforded her knowledge of things I had no way to understand.
“Well, I can’t sit around all day,” Lizzie said. “I’ve got to start frying some steaks and chicken for supper. It’s almost five.”
“I wouldn’t count on a big crowd,” Noah said. “I doubt many people will be in the mood to stay in town tonight. Once they get the answers they want, they’ll probably head home and lock their doors.”
Lizzie shrugged. “Maybe. But they’re just as likely to gather here and talk about it. I want to be ready in case they do.”
She whirled around and hurried toward the kitchen. I nodded at Noah and followed behind her. She pushed the door open and went over to the refrigerator, pulling out meat that would soon be turned into her famous chicken-fried steaks. I loved the huge refrigerator. Although I doubted Levi would agree to add electricity to our home after we married, secretly I wanted an electric refrigerator like Lizzie’s. Maybe not quite so large. Our small refrigerator at home had run on propane, which meant we had to keep our propane tank filled all the time. It wasn’t always easy. Sometimes in the winter, after a big snow, it was difficult to get to town to have our tank replenished. After Papa got sick, men from the church helped us, but they had to take care of their own families first. Many times it took a while for assistance to arrive, so we’d store our food in an outside shed. Since it was so cold, the food was just as safe as if it was in our refrigerator. Except for one winter when a group of wild dogs burrowed their way under the shed and carried away all of our meat.
Kingdom was full of animals. Although most of our older citizens weren’t raised to think of animals as pets, things had changed over the years. Many thoughtless people dropped off unwanted dogs and cats in the country, and a lot of them, just like the dogs who took our meat, found their way to our town. Those that hadn’t turned wild ended up as beloved members of Kingdom families. Even elderly residents who had never had pets when they were young became loving owners. Lizzie had adopted two abandoned cats that lived at the restaurant. The Houslers also had a darling dog, a white cairn terrier mix they’d named Muffin. The dog, dropped off and abandoned on the road to Kingdom, quickly won the hearts of the entire Housler family. Charity and Muffin bonded immediately, so there was never any question that he’d found his forever home. Now the dog slept on Charity’s bed and followed her everywhere she went. Muffin got his name not long after moving in. Lizzie discovered him standing on her kitchen table, eating some of the muffins she’d set out for breakfast. The small dog had already eaten two of them before his thievery was discovered.
Since I lived at the restaurant, the cats and I had become friends. After a while, Lizzie seemed to think they belonged to me. I didn’t mind. They were very sweet, and I’d grown fond of them.
One of the cats, Prince, a small calico, lay under the table in the kitchen. He looked completely relaxed. I wondered where the other cat, Dora, a Siamese, had gone to. She was probably upstairs sleeping on my bed.
“Are you okay?” Lizzie had stopped her supper preparations and was studying me.
I sighed. “I don’t know. So much has happened today, I’m having a hard time sorting out my feelings. I don’t remember ever getting as upset as I did earlier.” I paused and considered what I’d just said. “You know, Lizzie, except for today, I don’t recall ever getting really angry. I guess I’m just not that type of person.”
Lizzie looked at me strangely. “Everyone gets mad, you know. It’s not a sin, Callie. We just need to deal with it and not allow it to fester.”
“I guess. But I don’t seem to be able to let go of this. Maybe it’s everything else that’s going on.” I shook my head. “I honestly don’t know, but I don’t like this sensation. It makes me feel . . .” I struggled for the right word but couldn’t seem to find it.
“Human?” Lizzie said.
“I hope not. Experiencing this all the time would be terrible. I’ve already been out of sorts for the past month or so. Dealing with bouts of uncontrolled anger would be too much.”
“Callie,” Lizzie said softly, “didn’t you ever get mad at your father?”
I stared at her in amazement. “Papa? Of course not. I loved him, and he loved me. Why would I ever be angry with him?”
Lizzie crossed her arms and leaned against the counter. “Why would you be angry with him? Because it’s normal, Callie. We all get upset with our parents sometimes. Even if we love them. Surely there were difficult times when you were a child.”
“No, not really. When I was young, life seemed so peaceful. Some days I actually wish I could go back to the way things used to be.”
Lizzie frowned. “What are you thinking? Your childhood wasn’t ideal. I mean, with your mother leaving and all.”
“Goodness. You’re right. Guess I just kind of blocked that out. Papa always did his best to keep our lives on an even keel.”
Lizzie didn’t say anything, but her measured silence spoke volumes.
“I know you too well, Lizzie. When you get quiet, something’s wrong.”
She turned to look at me, biting her bottom lip. Finally, she said, “I remember our childhood. Even though you were younger, we spent a lot of time together. You lived just down the street from us. I also remember when your mother left. Your father . . .” Lizzie looked away for a moment, as if turning something over in her mind. She murmured something under her breath, but I couldn’t make it out. Then her eyes met mine. “Your father treated you like it was your fault your mother ran away. I can’t get some of the things he said to you out of my mind. I recall one day in particular when he and my father were talking in front of us. Your father said . . .” She hesitated again.
I wanted to tell her to stop, but for some reason I couldn’t seem to find my voice.
She took a deep breath. “Your father said that he planned to do the Christian thing and take care of you, but he wished your mother would have taken you with her.”
Lizzie’s words felt like knife wounds in my heart, and I stared at her in disbelief. “Lizzie Housler! My father never said any such thing! Why would you say something so awful?”
She walked over to where I stood, stopped only a few inches away from me, her dark eyes peering into mine. “Callie, he said it. How could you not remember? There is a part of your soul that you refuse to acknowledge. Look, I know you loved your father, and you took good care of him. But you’ve forgotten the way he treated you. I see how insecure you are. He’s the one who put it there. Sometimes I wonder if you really believe anyone loves you. Even Levi. And he adores you.”
I stepped back from her. “I’m sure you mean well, but you don’t know what you’re talking about. My father loved me. And Levi loves me. I know he does.” Even as I said the words, I knew they weren’t completely true. Hadn’t I just been wondering if he was sorry we’d gotten engaged?
“I wish you really believed that,” she said with a sigh. “You’ve pushed a lot of hurt and anger into a closet in your soul. You think you’ve locked the door and thrown away the key. Dismissed the past. But I think your reaction to Elmer shows that your closet is too full. It could burst open, and I’m worried about that. Worried about what will happen when it does.” She reached out and touched my arm. “The past is not so easily forgotten, Callie.”
An emotion I couldn’t understand coursed through my body. For some reason, I wanted to lash out at Lizzie. But she was my best friend. How could I?
“You’re . . . you’re wrong, Lizzie. Dead wrong. Please, I can’t talk about this right now. Not with everything that’s happening. It’s just too much to bear.”
She gazed at me for a few seconds longer and then turned away. “Okay. I’m sorry. Maybe you’re right. Knowing there’s a body right outside of town has my nerves on edge too. Let’s just forget it.” She pulled a huge pan out of the oven, put it on a nearby counter, and lifted the lid. The aroma of meat loaf filled the room.
I was still upset, but I knew I’d have to deal with my feelings. I had no intention of allowing anything to come between Lizzie and me. In my heart, she was the sister I’d never had. Obviously, she was confused. Maybe she’d overheard something as a child and mistakenly related it to Papa. I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that she would never try to purposely hurt me. After deciding to ignore her insensitive comments, I forced myself to say, “That smells wonderful. I know what I’m having for dinner.”
As if nothing had happened, she smiled at me. “You may be eating all of it if no one shows up.” She poked a fork into the large loaf and looked it over carefully. When she was satisfied, she took the fork out, re-covered the pan, and put it back in the oven to keep it warm. “Did you check the salt and pepper shakers?” she asked. “They were looking a little light.”
I sighed. “I started to, but with everything going on, I completely forgot. I’ll take care of it now.”
I spun around and hurried out to the dining room. Hope and Noah stood near the front door. Hope smiled when she saw me.
“Callie, will you tell Lizzie I’m going back to the shop for a while? I have a couple of things I want to do, and I know Beau needs to go out. I’ll be back in about an hour.”
“You can tell her yourself if you want. She’s not that busy right now.”
“That’s okay. I don’t want to bother her.” Hope wrapped herself up in her cloak. “Maybe when I come back there will be some news.”
“Are you bringing Beau with you?”
Hope and Ebbie’s dog, Beau, had been adopted by the entire town. He’d once belonged to Avery Menninger. When Avery died, Hope’s father took him in. After Ebbie and Hope got married last summer, Samuel gave him to the newlyweds. Lizzie had welcomed Beau into the restaurant without hesitation. He was a very clean dog and never begged food or acted obnoxious with the customers.
Hope laughed. “Yes, I’ll bring him with me. He would hate to miss the evening crowd.”
Noah held the door open and Hope slipped out. The cold air swept in, as if desperate to find warmth. He started to shut the door but pulled it open again when someone walked up to the entrance. Margaret Harper, one of Kingdom’s newest residents, stepped inside. Four months ago, Margaret had petitioned the elders to move to Kingdom after her husband was killed in a farm accident. Claiming to be second cousin to a resident who passed away many years ago, the elders felt an obligation to help her. She was very shy and for the most part kept to herself. For some reason, however, she seemed to gravitate toward me, always wanting to talk. I tried to be friendly, but there was something about her that made me uncomfortable. Unfortunately, Margaret and I had a tie that wouldn’t be broken anytime soon. The church purchased my home for her after I decided to move, wanting to distance myself from the memories of my father’s illness. My eyes drifted longingly toward the stairs that led to my apartment. More than anything in the world, I wanted to escape from this day and take a nice, long, leisurely nap, but there wasn’t any way I could desert Lizzie. Besides, I needed to be here for Levi when he returned.
“Hello, Margaret,” I said. “Can I get you something?”
Her eyes darted back and forth, taking in all the empty tables. “Are . . . are you closed? I thought you usually served dinner about now.”
“We do, but there’s been an unfortunate situation. A woman has been killed.”
Her dark-blue eyes grew wide. “Killed? Who? Someone from our church?”
I shook my head. “We don’t know. Levi and some of the men have gone to find out who it is. We’re waiting for their return.”
“Oh. I saw lots of townspeople gathered in the hardware store and inside the market. That must be why.”
“I wondered where they went. Got tired of waiting in here, I suppose.”
She granted me a rare smile. “I suspect it’s because Lizzie doesn’t cotton much to gossip. Harold Eberly’s usually at the center of it, and Aaron Metcalf’s too busy working at the general store to listen to folks blathering.”
“I’m sure you’re right. What can I get for you?”
She rubbed her hands together. “Just a cup of coffee, please. It’s so cold out.”
She sat down at a nearby table and removed her cloak. All her clothing looked old. It wasn’t tattered, just faded. She was always dressed in black or dark blue, although most of the women in town had transitioned to other colors and patterns. We still dressed modestly, but at least now there were choices—something that wasn’t allowed before the recent transformation in our church. Not everyone in Kingdom welcomed change, however. I wondered if Margaret dressed the way she did because of her beliefs, or if she didn’t have anything else besides the two or three dresses she wore over and over. With her work-worn fingers, she pushed a strand of brown hair, streaked with gray, behind her ear. Her bun was always messy, as if she wasn’t used to fashioning it. However, her most noticeable characteristic was a terrible scar that started over her left eye and ran down her cheek, twisting her features. I tried not to stare at it, but it was hard to miss. I wondered how it had happened. Although I didn’t like the woman much, I did feel sorry for her.
“Lizzie has some Dutch apple pie that would go very well with that coffee,” I said, feeling guilty about my aversion to Margaret. “It looks like she made way too much. If you’d like a slice—”
“Oh yes. That would be wonderful. Thank you.”
I nodded and went back to the kitchen, where I relayed to Lizzie what I’d said. “I’ll be happy to pay for it.”
“Don’t be silly. You know I’m happy to give anyone what they need. Besides, you were telling the truth. I really don’t want this pie to go to waste.” She grinned at me. “You’re getting to be as bad as I am.” She cut a large piece of pie and handed it to me. “And put some ice cream on it.”
I got the vanilla ice cream out of the freezer and added a big scoop to the plate with the pie. Then I poured a cup of coffee and carried them both out to Margaret’s table. When I set the pie and ice cream down in front of her, the weariness in her face seemed to ease a bit. I’d noticed that she always looked tired, and whenever she could manage a smile, it never reached her eyes. There was a deep sadness about Margaret that seemed to have seeped into every part of her body. Losing a husband had to be very difficult, and being so badly scarred was probably a heavy burden for a woman to bear.
“Do you have time to sit a bit?” she asked.
I shook my head. “I’ve got to refill the salt and pepper shakers before supper, but we can visit while I do it.”
What little animation there was in her face melted. She was obviously lonely. As her sister in Christ, it was my obligation to treat her with kindness. Why was it so hard for me? I went back to the kitchen to get the large containers of salt and pepper. Taking a moment to send up a prayer for patience, I went back into the dining room, determined to show Christian love. Margaret looked up from her pie as I neared her table. The abject unhappiness in her expression made me instantly ashamed of my selfish attitude.
“So how are you adjusting to the house?” I asked as I filled the shakers on her table.
She grasped her coffee cup with both hands, and I noticed they shook slightly. “I’m so grateful for all the work being done by the church to fix it up. With a little effort, it will be quite comfortable.”
“I’m glad. When Papa was well he took good care of it. But after he got sick, I’m afraid it fell into disrepair. I tried to keep it up, but I was so busy caring for him and working that after a while I just gave up.” I was concentrating on filling the salt shaker, and when I looked up, I saw her grimace, the way someone might when they’re in pain.
“Are you all right? Is something wrong?”
She shook her head and put her hand on her stomach. “I’m a little sensitive to milk. Ice cream upsets my stomach some.”
I frowned at her. “I’m so sorry. If I’d known . . .”
She waved her hand at me. “It’s okay. Some things are worth the pain.”
I grinned at her. “I’m exactly the same way with dairy products. But I have no plans to give up ice cream. Life without ice cream? Can’t imagine it.”
Margaret nodded. “I agree.”
“I do stay away from milk though. Never did care much for it. Even when I was a little girl. Of course, most of that probably comes from the way it affects me.”
“My mother tried to make me drink milk when I was young, thinking it was good for me. She didn’t realize how uncomfortable it made me.”
“The same thing happened to me,” I said. “It made my mother feel bad when she realized I was allergic.”
Margaret didn’t respond, she just looked at me in an odd way. That prickly feeling returned, and before I realized it, I’d filled the shaker too full, and salt ran over the side. I tore my gaze away from the strange woman and concentrated on cleaning up the mess I’d made. My stomach turned over, and it had nothing to do with milk.
“I-I’m sorry I stare at you so much,” Margaret stuttered, noticing my reaction. “It’s just that you remind me of someone. A woman I knew in Missouri.”
“Really? I hope she was a friend.”
“I guess she was a friend once. In a manner of speaking.”
Not knowing what to say, I just smiled and moved on to the next table. Although my back was to her, I heard her clear her throat.
“She had red curly hair, just like yours. And her eyes were blue. Bluer than yours. Your eyes are more grayish-blue, I guess. She was a beautiful woman, but she didn’t value herself very much. She had a sad life full of wrong choices.”
“I’m sorry.”
“You’re a very attractive young woman. Are you aware of that, Callie?”
I turned to look at her, startled by her declaration. “Me? Attractive?” I shook my head. “I don’t see myself like that.” I found her words odd, since Mennonites are raised not to think about outer beauty. In fact, in our community, even looking in a mirror is discouraged. Papa and I didn’t have any mirrors in our house. Whether it was because of our Mennonite beliefs or because of my mother, I was never sure. Papa told me once that Mama was very proud of her looks, and that her lack of humility drove her from us.
Margaret shook her head slowly. “You’re wrong, Callie. You’re not only beautiful on the inside, kind and compassionate, but you’re physically beautiful as well.” There was a hint of sadness in her voice. “Beauty isn’t anything to be ashamed of, as long as you don’t let it become your identity.”
I had to wonder why she’d said that. With that awful scar, it was impossible to tell if she’d ever been attractive. Even without it, her eyes were sunken, shadowed underneath by dark rings, and there was almost no color in her cheeks. I tried to imagine her much younger, and without the scar, but I just couldn’t.
“Excuse me a moment, will you?” I left to finish filling the shakers on the other tables. It took several minutes. When I turned back to check on Margaret, I saw that Ruth Fisher was sitting with her. They seemed to be engaged in a very animated conversation. I breathed a sigh of relief, grateful to have been given a way out of our awkward conversation.
I was getting ready to carry the salt and pepper containers back to the kitchen when I heard the sound of an automobile engine outside the restaurant. I glanced toward the window and saw the sheriff’s car stop just outside the door. I hurried back to the kitchen.
“They’re here,” I told Lizzie.
We stared at each other, neither one of us making a move toward the door.
“Whatever they say, we’ll get through this, Callie,” Lizzie said. “We’ll be okay.”
She put down the piece of steak she’d been breading and hastily washed her hands. As I waited for her, I wondered if her words would prove to be true. Or if what was waiting for us would change Kingdom forever.