We lost Stevie in April last year, and none of us will ever be the same. I was shocked and destroyed when he chose to leave us. He seemed happy. He seemed to have found his niche in life. After all the dramas he was calm and peaceful. He was in love with Hilary, his partner, and doted on her daughters. He had beaten alcoholism. He was close again with James and me. He always had a way of sabotaging himself – ‘Life is too good, I don’t deserve it, how can I stuff it up for myself?’ When things were going well he was at his most vulnerable. The world is a quieter, duller place for his passing. It’s funny; I felt so safe with Mum and she died, and I felt safe with Stephen and he died.
I believe we’ll all meet again somewhere, but in the meantime ...
Although Mum and Stephen have gone and I love them and miss them every day, I’m doing okay. They drop in on me every now and again. Genevieve calls me ‘HONI’, an acronym for ‘Her Of No Issues’, but I’m not sure if that’s true!
There is only one positive to come out of Steve’s death. It is the large group of amazing people I have inherited, so to speak, because of our love for my brother. He brought us all together so beautifully. We are all so different. What we have in common is that we adore Steve. That’s an amazing gift to leave. I am so very proud of him. I am so very proud of both my brothers. Now you know their stories, I hope you will be proud of them, too.