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The first time I worked at Rooster’s, getting up close and personal with the Executioners, I saw them as they really were—rough, dangerous assholes. But I was kept back, not really engaging with them. As the days turned to weeks, I was allowed to talk to the men, hear their stories, and get to know them as people. Their hard edges softened. They seemed less dangerous. I started viewing them as weekend warrior types.
Especially Conor and Lowell. My man can be so fucking goofy and fun that I forget he’s a killer. My dad is harder to read, but I see how he flirts with Topanga and goes “dad mode” with Dunning. They don’t seem scary.
Yet, as soon as the men leave our SUV and move with violent intentions, I’m reminded of the body count necessary to create the Executioners’ current comfortable life. Conor and Lowell show no hesitation. While I’m terrified, they move with the confidence that comes from taking lives before. I think back to Conor’s scarred stomach and then glance at the back of Aja’s head. She was there with him when he got hurt. Was she scared then? Is she afraid now?
Like Conor and Lowell, Aja reveals no hesitation. That’s how certain people work. Uncle Clive was that way. Aunt Immee rarely flinched in the face of danger. She’d been beaten too much growing up to feel fear as an adult. But her daughter did flinch when a guy got too rough. Zella was soft inside, protected from the truly ugly side of life. I’m not so different. I can throw down with a girl like Taryn, yet I’m currently shaking like a leaf as I watch stronger people do what they seem born to do.
Eckles opens my passenger door, and Needy slides in next to me. She blinks a few times before realizing I’m within reach. I forget to breathe. A part of me assumed the worst would happen. Why shouldn’t I lose what I love?
“Monroe,” she says, wrapping me in her arms like she did when I was scared during a thunderstorm.
And I do feel like a dumb kid, terrified of doom and gloom stealing what I love. Her arms around me erase much of my shaking and put a halt to my tears. When Conor slides in next to me on the other side, my fear disappears altogether. I even smile when Lowell joins Aja up front. My people are safe.
The SUV jerks forward as Aja speeds out of the parking lot. Lowell glances back at us. His expression is frozen in his mean motherfucker expression, but his dark eyes soften at the sight of my smile.
“Hello, Lowell,” Needy says as she strokes my head.
“Hello, Needy,” he replies before turning back around.
“He’s shy,” Conor tells my mom.
“You look like your father,” Needy says to Conor and then adds, “I’m sure you’re sick of hearing that.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“Well, you grew up since I knew you.”
“You have no idea,” I tell my mom before smiling at Conor. “He’s big in all the right places.”
Aja laughs at something Lowell mutters under his breath. I smile at Conor and then Needy.
“He found you for me.”
Needy wraps me tighter and whispers how much she missed me. She likely feels on the spot, and we’ve never been overly emotional people in public. We just look at each other as if making up for not seeing each other’s faces for so long.
I can’t wait to tell her everything. I don’t know how people will react to her return to Elko or if my uncle will start trouble. I just need her to be in my life, or else nothing feels right.
Ten miles outside of the town where Needy was trapped, we pull the SUVs into a gas station so Aja can join her group. Before she goes, I feel as if I should repay her for helping.
“Thank you for saving my mom,” I tell Aja as we stand near the gas pumps.
Conor shrugs. “Turned out we didn’t need so much muscle.”
“Never know,” Aja says, stretching like she’s preparing for a jog. “Going in hot is better than playing things cool and ending up cold, you know. Dead ain’t better.”
Conor hands an envelope to Aja. “To make this business, so the Executioners don’t feel as if they owe anyone anything.”
“Bunch of fucking babies,” Aja says, tossing the envelope at Minx. “But I get it. Still, I want one more payment.”
“Name it.”
“I need to talk to the old ball and chain alone.”
Conor frowns at me and then back at his sister. Before he can complain, I agree.
“It’s okay,” I promise, wanting to keep things relaxed between his not-so-secret sister and me.
Aja and I step aside, where she sizes me up. I thank her again for helping.
“You’re welcome. To repay me, take good care of Conor.”
“I will.”
“He’s neurotic, you know?” Aja says, giving me a knowing head nod. “Thinking and plotting and worrying and wondering. The man needs something to settle him down before he dies from stress. He seems calmer now that he has you, but I’ve barely seen you together. I hope you can keep him sane.”
“I never thought of him as crazy.”
“Yeah, he hides it well. But he’s got crazy in his blood. His dad was a wild man. His mom is insane in the membrane.”
“Wasn’t he your dad, too?”
Aja fights with her loose brown hair flying in her face. “Sure, but I think of my stepdad as my dad. Wheels was the guy who left spunk inside my mom. Wheels wasn’t my family, but Conor is. I want him to be happy, and he’s really into you. So you better be into him, or I’ll have to do something about that.”
Unable to stop myself, I push back against her attitude. “What could you do?”
“I have no clue,” she says, eyeing my feet for some reason. “I don’t devise plans until necessary. I’m not a worrywart like Conor.”
“Well, I love Conor, and I’ll give him whatever he needs.”
“If we fight,” she says, now staring at my hair, “you should be aware that I’m a high kicker. I could easily nail you in the forehead.”
“Well, I don’t want to fight you, even if you weren’t an awesome kicker.”
Amusement flashes in Aja’s green eyes that are so similar to Conor’s. “Then, love my brother with the good part of your heart and not the shitty part.”
“What makes you think I have a shitty part?”
“You seem a little trashy.”
My mouth pops open, and I instantly think of how my family was known as mud people. “Trashy, how?”
“Oh, don’t splooge with rage. I’m just fucking with you. It’s what we do with new people in my world. You know, to test them.”
“Wait, so you mock them so they’ll feel sad?”
“Sure. It scares off the weenies.”
Feeling awkward now, I mumble, “Oh, well, I’m not scared off, but you did hurt my feelings.”
“But I don’t know you,” Aja says as if I’m nuts. “How can my opinion matter?”
“Your words feed into a former insecurity, confirming what others told me.”
“That’s dumb. You can’t listen to other people. Most of them have shit for brains. Only listen to the people who matter. Conor thinks you’re his shining star, drawing him away from the darkness of his inner crazy. That matters more than the opinion of a stranger who threatened to kick you in the head.”
“You’re right. Conor’s opinion matters more than yours. This has been a good talk.”
Aja smiles warmly, but I still think she might try to sucker punch me. The twinkle in her eye freaks me out.
“Conor lives in a community where everyone knows and loves him, yet he often feels alone. I’m glad he has you,” she says and pats my head. “He needs a ride-or-die bitch in his corner if he ever wants to run that club. Be his bitch, Monroe Hobbs.”
“I will.”
“Embrace his corner,” she says, backing away and making her voice echo. “Let him feel safe in your arms. Maybe jack him off if necessary. Just be there.”
Grinning at her wink, I watch her hurry over to her SUV, which revs menacingly. Once inside, she offers a wave to Conor as Gully hits the gas.
“What did she want?” Conor asks, watching his sister’s SUV speed away.
“To make sure I would watch your back, be in your corner, and offer handjobs when necessary.”
Lowell grunts his disapproval while Mom wears a bland WTF expression. Conor slides his long arm along my shoulders and snuggles me against his body.
“She knows what I need,” he murmurs, kissing the top of my head.
“And you knew what I needed,” I whisper, thinking of how he brought my mom back to me. “I’ll be your ride-or-die bitch until I get fat and you scrape me out of your life.”
“No, baby, I’m horny for wide loads and fat rolls. We’re doing the ‘til death do us part’ thing.”
Sharing his smile, I cuddle closer to him and then reach for Mom. “Can we hang out here for a while, just like this?”
“No,” Lowell says, opening the Suburban’s back door and gesturing for Needy to get inside. “We need to put more distance between the scene of the crime and us.”
“Oh, well, I didn’t literally want to stand in a gas station,” I say, grinning at the grump. I slide into the SUV and wave for Mom to join me. She immediately wraps me in a hug. “Will you miss anything about living in that place?” I whisper to her.
Needy glances out the back windows as Lowell pulls the SUV onto the highway. When she looks at me, she sighs. “Not one fucking thing. I was there to keep you safe. Now, you have your dad and Conor to protect you.”
Cuddling my mom, I don’t care if I seem like a major dork to the men in the car. I’ve missed her so much, and there are so many things I need to tell her. For now, I just enjoy her steady heartbeat like I did when I was a kid.
