With the night sky a gentle respite to the last twenty-four hours, Jackson sat on the back deck, his heart twisted into a ball of fear.
Blaire had gone into the house to get them both something to drink.
So much had happened in the last day and a half. What is it? Two in the morning? His mind was so jumbled with thoughts and events he could barely process a single thing. Now he waited for Blaire to emerge from the house so he could tell her his brother was the one who had put her in the crosshairs of Karlos Rivera. And then, she would leave him, he had no doubt, and he could add one more shitstorm to his day. How did it come to this? We were so happy.
He glanced at the dogs out in their kennel. They were all engaged in a game of “sniff you to see if you’re safe.” So far, the consensus seemed to be a tail-wagging yes. Midget and Maxine had been overjoyed to greet their new adopted brother. And Padre just seemed happy to be well cared for and fed. So, once they’d been introduced and showed no signs of wanting to hurt one another, he’d put them all in the kennel so he and Blaire could talk.
The whoosh of the sliding glass door followed by light footsteps shocked his heart into a pounding bass beat crescendo. He sat up straight, pressed his palms into the wrought iron table, and waited.
Blaire smiled as she approached, bearing two mugs of steaming liquid. She sat one in front of Jackson, and one on the table for her. Then, she settled into the seat opposite him.
She looked so damn pretty illuminated in the dim porch light, he almost thought about not saying a word and digging into his reserves to have sex with her. But even his reserves were failing at this point. He barely had the strength to open his mouth.
Instead, he focused on the beverage before him. It smelled of chocolate and cinnamon.
“What’s this?”
“Hot chocolate. You seemed so tense the entire ride home, I thought you needed something soothing.” Her smile widened.
He tried to memorize it. She had a beautiful smile. He would miss it when she left him.
Her smile vanished. “Jackson.” She reached out and put her palms on his fingers. “Whatever it is you need to tell me, we’ll deal.”
“Maybe,” he mumbled.
“Sip your chocolate, take a deep breath, and tell me.” She withdrew her hands, picked up her mug, and took a drink.
He did the same, relishing the sweet warmth in his mouth. “Mmm. This is good. Did your mama make this for you when you were little?”
“Yes.”
He nodded, gathering his thoughts. Finally, he blew out his breath and said, “Okay. I’m ready.”
“Okay,” she said, squaring her shoulders. “Me, too.”
“So…my dad was in the trailer.”
Her head bobbed up and down. “I gathered that. How did it go?”
“I got some shit out of my system. Told him some stuff I always wanted to say to him, but my words fell on deaf ears. He didn’t seem affected. There was no remorse in his eyes—nothing.” He shook his head.
“Oh, I’m so sorry, Jackson. That must have sucked.” Blaire’s eyes conveyed sympathy.
“Sort of. I don’t know what I was expecting. Well, first of all, I sure wasn’t expecting him to be sitting there. I completely forgot Jake told me he was staying with him. And all of Jake’s bullshit about how Dad was clean and sober and helping him be a better man was just that—bullshit. Dad was sitting there, drinking some cheap booze. He looked old, gaunt, tired, and washed up, just like Jake. Shit.” He ran a hand over his face. He suddenly felt like he could fall dead asleep in the yard.
“I’m sorry,” she said again. “Did you get any closure?”
He thought for a second. “Yeah. I did but not because of Dad’s words of wisdom, or hugs or care or anything. I got closure because of decisions I made. He’s dead to me. Dead. So is Jake. I’ve washed my hands of the both of them.”
His jaw set into a rigid block.
Blaire nodded. “That’s probably for the best. It probably hurts, but you did the right thing. I’m sorry, Jackson, but I hate your brother so much. I’ve been stewing over him ever since you told me about the fire. He almost killed you—you and your team. And that entire forest is gone. All the animals.”
Jackson’s heart raced. He blinked like a maniac, unable to get the rest of the story from his brain to his mouth.
“I swear he’s dead to me.” He swallowed and turned away.
“What?” Blaire said. “What aren’t you saying?”
“Baby, I…” He held his hands out, palm up. Then, he dropped his head in his hands. “Shit, this is hard.”
“You’re scaring me. Just say it.” Her voice sounded tense and high.
He blew out a lungful of air. Let’s get this over with.
“He’s the one who put you in the path of Rivera,” he blurted.
“He, who?”
“Jake. He went to that clinic where you used to work.”
She scowled. “The one in downtown Seattle I worked at while attending beauty school? Are you kidding?”
“That’s the one.”
She shivered. “That place was always slammed with patients. I probably checked him in or at least saw him in the waiting room. That’s why he looked familiar and why he always creeped me out. What are the odds that I would fall in love with his brother?”
“Right? And then, apparently, Rivera was in Seattle for some reason, and he spied you. He wanted you but didn’t feel like he could just approach you. Who knows why? Maybe he was already wanted in Seattle, I don’t know. But then, apparently Jake’s dealer screwed one of Rivera’s distributors, and Jake’s guy gave up Jake. That’s what I made out, anyway. And he…” The words caught in his throat like a fishhook.
“He, what?” Blaire snapped. “Cough up the details.”
“Jake sent you the message you thought was from Karlos on your phone. Karlos was trying to mess with you from wherever he was—he might have already been in prison, or in hiding, I don’t know. So, Jake sent the flowers and the note.”
Blaire’s head fell back, and she stared up at the sky. “Oh, my fucking God.”
The seconds stretched out, long, sticky, and painful, as Jackson waited for her to say something.
Her hands flew to her head, and she tugged her growing locks. “Oh, my fucking God,” she said again. “And I went all half-cocked and acted like a teenage lunatic.”
“It could have been worse,” Jackson said.
She lifted her head and looked him dead in the eyes.
“Rivera wanted to find out who snitched on him. He wanted to murder the snitch. If that had happened…” Jackson’s voice broke.
Blaire’s face drained of color. She swallowed hard. Her breathing began to quicken.
“I hate your brother,” she said, voice even. Her eyes glinted with rage, though.
“Me, too. I just—”
She held out her hand like a stop sign and drew her fingers across her lips. “Zip it. Don’t say a word. Don’t move. I’ve got to go run right now, or I’m going to lose it.”
“All right. Okay. Got it.”
She shot to her feet and raced toward the back gate, threw it open, and darted from the yard.
Footsteps pounded along the street on the other side of the house.
Jackson winced. Should I follow her? Do as she says? He started to stand, but his body refused to move. If he went after her already, she probably wouldn’t want to speak to him.
He drummed his fingers on the table and stared at nothing.
A few minutes later, a faint cry of anguish competed with the waves across the street. His heart bunched into a knot of anguish.
I can’t wait. She’s in distress.
He forced his body to rise, and then let himself out of the yard and jogged across the street.
The dim light made it hard to see, but he managed to make out a dark shape hunched in the sand. Jackson ran to Blaire, dropping to his knees by her side.
Wrapping his arms around her, he cradled her. “Baby, I’m so sorry. I had no idea.”
She didn’t resist, so he took this as a good sign.
She sobbed. “Let’s get this behind us, Jackson,” she blubbered into her hands. “You, you should be in bed right now, next to me. You should be resting and healing. I should be comforting you. You’ve been through hell. And here we are dealing with your goddamned brother. Let’s let this be the last time your brother comes between us.” She lifted her head and met his gaze, eyes red. “I hate your brother so hard right now. Can’t stand the thought of him. But I refuse to let that kind of toxic energy destroy me…destroy us.”
Jackson’s breath stuck in his throat. “So, you’re not leaving me?”
“What?” She frowned. “After all we’ve been through? No, I’m not leaving you. What a dumb thing to say.”
“I thought you’d leave me when I told you what he’d done,” Jackson said, suddenly aware of his shaking hands.
“Did you have anything to do with it?” she said.
“What? God, no.”
“You’re not your brother, Jackson. You’re so not your brother,” she said, gripping his fingers.
“What if, every time you look at me, you see Jake?” Jackson said. “It’s a real possibility.”
Her lips rolled between her teeth, and, she thought a moment. “I’ve never seen you as anyone but the amazing hero you are, Jackson. You’ve shown me nothing but kindness and care. When I met your brother, I couldn’t believe you two were cut from the same cloth.”
Jackson let out a long breath of relief. “Thank you. I don’t know what I’d do if you left me, but I’d understand.”
“Don’t go there, honey. I’m tired, you’re tired, you’ve been through literal hell and back, I’ve lived through my own hell…” She shook her head. “I should have known something was up when there was no black rose in the flowers.”
“Jake was told to get one, but he probably decided to forego it to save money,” Jackson said.
“I’ll bet it was him snooping around the house.” She gritted her teeth together.
“You’re probably right,” Jackson said.
Kneeling before him in the sand, she placed her hands on top of his thighs and gazed at him intently.
He savored the warmth. He positioned his palms on top of her hands.
“Rivera couldn’t have wooed me if I had more self-esteem. So Jake was the snake who told him where to find me in Colorado.” She shrugged one shoulder. “Let’s make a deal. Let’s both make an effort to change and heal from all this.”
“Anything. Name your terms,” he said, gazing intently into her violet eyes. “I’ll do anything for you.”
“Therapy. I need to grow my self-confidence and you need to stop being your brother’s co-dependent.”
He nodded. “I have to go to therapy anyway to deal with PTSD or emotional trauma from the fire.”
She nodded.
“Good. Let’s go on lots more dates, too. More good times together. And…I was going to wait to surprise you, but you need some good news right now,” she said.
“As long as you’re going to stay with me, I don’t need any more good news,” he said.
“But this news is great,” she said, with a grin.
“Tell me.” He leaned forward and kissed her. His lips against hers did more to restore him than anything. Reluctantly, he inched away. “Tell me before I fall over dead asleep and we spend the night in the sand,” he said, then, kissed her again.
God, she feels good.
“You know how I’ve been dissatisfied with my job. It’s not for me. I’m going to the academy,” she said, her breath warm against his lips. “I wanted to wait until tomorrow to tell you but now’s as good as any.”
He drew away, blinking. “What kind of academy? The fire academy?”
Excitement radiated from her face as she nodded. “I know I’ll have to be a volunteer for a while, but your department has this new deal where, once I finish the academy and get a job as a career firefighter, I can apply for assistance to become a paramedic. If I’m a good candidate for the department, they’ll pay for it. I’m going to go for it. I’ve already got all the paperwork. I went straight to the department after I left you at the fire.”
“Sweetheart, that’s fantastic!” Jackson said. “You’re right, that is great news!” He leaned forward and kissed her again. “You’ll make a great firefighter.”
“Thank you. I’ll do my best. I think it will help shake me out of this dumb victim status I’ve been rolling with for years, but now, can we please go home and go to bed?”
“Absolutely.” He pushed to stand and extended his hand to her.
Gracefully, she accepted it, standing, and put her arm around his back.
He winced and arched away. “Ye-ouch. Sorry, sweetheart, my back is off-limits.”
“Oh!” Her hands flew to her face. “I’m so sorry. I keep forgetting.” She reached out and took his hand in hers. “Better?”
“Much,” he said, drawing up her hand to kiss her knuckles. “I’m ready for all this bullshit to come to an end.”
“God, yes,” she said.
They walked across the sand, heading for home—their home—where they could both begin rebuilding their lives anew…together.