Dorenia
“Okay, so it’s the bastard who turned you,” Kalila says. “He’s trying to finish the job. I get it. We can go kill him now.”
“Let me finish the story,” I snap. “You need to hear it all. I don’t want us to walk in without being fully ready.”
“I don’t see what more I could need to know.”
“Well, listen, and you’ll find out.”
We walked on the road home. I could’ve easily run it, but the one time I tried carrying Mala, she threw up, so we’d been enjoying evening walks home together each night. “You know, you don’t have to keep coming with me,” I said, as we walked along the river. It was only a little off the road, and it both avoided crowds and gave us a better view.
She didn’t quite meet my eyes as she shrugged. “I know.”
“You’re still worried I’ll eat someone.”
“No!” she said far too loudly. “Maybe a little. But not really. I trust you. I’m more worried for you. I know how much it affected you when you attacked that girl. It’s not that I think you’re going to bring shame to our family or get us kicked out of Liverpool, though I’m sure we’ll manage that anyway. It’s that I’m scared that you’ll find yourself in a position where you can’t resist it again. Maybe you won’t kill anyone, but it’s still a temptation that I don’t want you to have to face alone. If I’m there with you, then you don’t have to.”
I tossed a stone on the river, and it bounced a few dozen times. “I don’t know if I would. I’d like to think I wouldn’t. It only happened the one time, and that was when I’d come back to life and was starving. You’ve made sure I haven’t gotten to that point again.”
“And I’ll never let you.”
I glanced at her, trying to give an appreciative smile, but fear kept it from me. “I know that you’d like to do your own work.” It sounded almost petulant. I was trying to avoid saying that I didn’t want to burden her when I already took so much.
“As much as we’re making and as little work as it is, I’d take this any day. And it means I get to spend time with you. If anything, you’re doing me a favor.”
“All right.” I stared at my feet. The path was even enough that even without my improved balance, I wouldn’t need to watch my step, but it gave me an excuse to avoid her eyes. “Do you think I’m doing something to our customers? You’re right, we’ve been making a lot of money. Too much. I can give them any price, and I barely have to pitch it, and they open up their purses and buy anything we offer. Hell, they buy our cloth when they have far nicer fabric.”
She took my hand and stood next to me. “I hadn’t considered that. Or maybe I hadn’t wanted to.”
I nodded. “You think I am?”
“Maybe. Is it so wrong if you are? They have money. And it’s quality goods. We’re hardly ripping them off.”
“Are you making excuses?”
She squeezed my hand but didn’t say anything as we resumed our leisurely pace.
“Am I still the same person?” I asked. “I died. Or maybe she died.”
“You’re you. You’re Dorenia. Worry about the morality all you want, but don’t you dare think that I don’t know my best friend. You’re not some monster wearing her face, you’re my cousin, you’re the same girl I’ve been playing with since we were born. I would know you anywhere, and you’re you.”
I nodded and rubbed my eyes with my free hand, trying not to cry. “Thank you.”
She took in a breath as if she had more to say, but instead, she only smiled at me and tugged on my arm for me to pick up speed. “It’s getting dark. And cold.”
“I could always carry you.”
“No!”
I chuckled. That felt more like it. “Let’s go back on the road. It’ll be faster.”
She nodded, and we moved back to the trail. It was late enough that there weren’t many people around, so we had free rein and managed to pick up the pace, not quite running down the main road.
We slowed as we saw someone on the path so we could go around them, but as we got closer, if there was blood in my veins, it would’ve run cold.
There was a man in a fancy suit, with a top hat and a cane. He was old, far older than I remembered, though perhaps his strength erased his age in my mind. He strolled down the road, looking around, sniffing the air. He must’ve caught the scent of a young woman, as he turned, his eyes alight with hunger, the same look I saw on them the better part of a year earlier and the same look my victim must’ve seen that night.
His eyes met mine, and he faltered.
“Dorenia?” Mala asked, sounding pained. “You’re crushing my hand.”
I stared down at it. Her fingers would bruise, but they weren’t broken.
“Dorenia,” he repeated after her.
She looked between us.
“How are you still alive?” He sniffed the air again, his face contorting from that look of hunger to one of anger. “How did you become a vampire?”
I took a step back, dragging Mala with me.
“Oh! Oh.” She stared at him. “He’s the man who—”
“My reputation precedes me. How interesting. I’ve never had a victim live to tell the tale before. I should fix that.” He strode toward us, his cane thudding on the ground.
I picked Mala up and ran. She yelped and clung to me as I barreled down the road, narrowly avoiding knocking over someone else. I stopped and looked back. It was an older woman looking around confused and jostled. If he was still following us, he’d go right for her. She’d be vulnerable and in the way, and it would be my fault. “Mala, go home.”
“The hell I will. I’m not leaving you to deal with this monster.”
I spun on her, but what could I say? He knew what he was doing. Beyond running, I hadn’t tested any of my new abilities. I could still remember the feeling of his hand crushing my neck. It’d happen again. Would it kill me this time? Could I die if I wasn’t staked into a coffin I’d never been given? Where was his coffin?
“We can run,” she said. “We have enough money. If we talk to everyone, they’ll be ready to leave. We don’t have to stay in Liverpool with this…I probably shouldn’t keep saying monster.”
“I’d like to think that I’m not, but he definitely is.”
“Get,” the woman shouted. “I see the way you’re looking at me. I don’t have any money on me.”
Mala met my eyes. “He wants to kill you. I doubt he’ll go for her, and if he does, I’m not sure she doesn’t deserve it.”
“But—”
“Get!” the old woman repeated. “I’ll call the constable.”
I sniffed. There was the sickening scent of death in the air. He was nearby. He must’ve been intentionally staying back like he did before; he wanted us to be scared. The old lady had already seen me run, so there was no sense in hiding it. I grabbed Mala again and ran all the way home. It was a terrible idea. All it would do was lead him right to us, but it wasn’t as if he couldn’t find us on his own.
I stopped in the middle of our caravan, and Mala leapt from my hands, looking green. “We have to get out of here,” she shouted.
Our chief looked up from a card game a few wagons over. “What’s going on?” he asked as he approached us.
“The guy that killed her is coming for us,” Mala said.
“We don’t know that.”
“You don’t think him looking at me like food and saying that he wanted to kill you was a pretty good clue? He’s coming for us, and we can either bury our heads in the sand, or we can leave. It’s what we do. We’ve angered enough people here. It’s time to find someplace else. Preferably without an angry strigoi who wants to kill all of us.”
That scent was growing closer. His cane sounded far away, but it was there. Thud. Thud. Growing closer. “He’s already here.”
“Everyone, hitch up the horses,” Mala shouted.
The camp began to move all at once. No one tried to argue. We formed up the wagons and readied the horses, but it wouldn’t be fast enough. He was there, right outside, waiting for us, but for what? Did he want to catch us as we fled? Was he waiting for when we fell asleep, and he wasn’t expecting us to leave?
No, as loud as we were, he’d have heard us. He was trying to manipulate me, to make me too scared and cause me to do something stupid. So I did something stupid, and I just had to hope it wasn’t what he wanted because nothing else I could think of would work. “I need a weapon.”
Tsura tossed me a woodcutting axe. I hadn’t even realized she was nearby. She must have wanted to impart some more wisdom. “Take his head. If anything will kill him, it’s that.” It was useful.
“Don’t be ridiculous,” Mala said. “You don’t know how to fight.”
“I know a little.”
“We’re running. That’s it.”
I jabbed the axe toward the road. “He’s waiting out there, watching us. As soon as we leave, he’ll kill us all. The least I can do is buy time.”
“Yeah, and sacrifice yourself again.”
I shook my head. “I won’t.”
“If you don’t come back…”
I hugged her. “I promise, I’ll come back. If I can kill him, great, he deserves it, he murdered me, but all I need is to keep him busy while you all leave. I’ll meet you partway to—”
“Don’t say it out loud,” our chief said. “If you think he’s watching.”
“You’re right. But we’re still going where we’d planned?”
“The one after that. That one was too close. I know how fast you are.”
I looked to the road, but he still hadn’t come any closer. “You truly think that’s any better?”
“I don’t know, but I know it can’t be worse.”
He was right. I sighed and tightened my grip on the axe. I could travel around a mile a minute without pushing myself. Even with his cane, I couldn’t assume he’d be any slower. Sheffield was at least a day’s ride away, but either of us could run it in an hour, easily. How would I keep something like him busy? Could I lead him on a wild-goose chase? Nothing seemed like it would work well enough, but I didn’t have the luxury of planning. I had to act now if I wanted my family to be safe.
I took a deep breath and stepped away from the camp.
“Wait,” Mala said. “Do you need some blood first?”
I licked my lips, looking to her neck, then back to the road. Would that attract him?
“I don’t know what you’re getting yourself into, so please, let me do what little I can to help.”
I didn’t have the strength to resist, and I promptly bit into her neck. It had only been a day since I’d last fed, so I kept myself from going too far, only allowing a snack, but I had to hope it was enough. I was going to need everything I had to stand a chance against him.
He was out there. I could smell him. I’d had practice tracking, but that was the occasional runaway chicken, not undead monsters who could be somewhere else as quickly as they wanted. If he didn’t want to be found, I wasn’t sure I could do anything about it.
But he wanted to kill me. And more than that, he wanted to scare me or else he wouldn’t have done the whole show of stalking me and watching my family. Running from me would ruin that mystique and turn him from predator into prey.
The scent of death was close. He didn’t smell like a corpse, but it clung to him, not overpowering but simply there. He wasn’t on the main road, but he didn’t seem far from it. As I walked toward the river, the scent grew closer. He was no longer keeping up his cat-and-mouse game of always being the same distance away. Was he that eager to end this?
The axe felt heavy. I’d never killed anyone before. I wasn’t sure I could do it, but I knew that if I didn’t at least try, then he’d kill the people I loved. All I had to do was buy time, but if I wasn’t willing to give it my all and actually try to kill him, then I wouldn’t stand a chance, as he certainly wouldn’t be holding back.
I found him waiting by the river, sitting on a rock, his gaze locked in the direction of our caravan. Could he see it from there? My vision was enhanced by the change, but I had trouble imagining that I’d be able to make anything out at this distance. I wanted to turn and check, but that would mean turning my back on him, and that wasn’t worth the risk.
He stood as I approached, his eyes narrowing, fangs showing in a look of utter disgust. It wasn’t exactly a look I was unaccustomed to seeing, particularly on those as wealthy as he appeared. “How did you do it?” he asked. “I didn’t make you. How are you alive? You were human when I ate you.”
It bothered him. I knew he hated that I was alive. That look when he first saw me had made it clear. He didn’t understand it, and that seemed to drive him crazy. I could use that. In a proper fight, I didn’t like my odds against someone who had been doing this for a lot longer than me, but in a conversation, I was fairly certain I could manage. I was there to buy time, and if that meant answering his questions, then he could ask away. “You called me a vampire earlier. I thought I was a strigoi.”
“It’s not a meaningful distinction,” he said, tapping his cane on the ground. It wasn’t in the normal threatening manner; it seemed more irritated. It was working. He was getting caught up already. Maybe he wouldn’t notice my family leaving. “A strigoi is a type of vampire. Or maybe another word for it. We’re an old creature, and I’ve never been quite certain if there were different similar species or if it simply manifested that differently sometimes. It seems to change for everyone.”
“What’s it like for you?”
His eyes narrowed. Was I being too obvious? “You truly expect me to give away my inner workings and weaknesses? You won’t be alive long enough for any of it to matter. You’re a mistake. An impossibility. And as curious as that is, do not for a second think that my curiosity will allow you to live.”
“Well, if I’m going to die anyway, then what’s the harm? But can I really die? Aren’t I already dead?”
His eyes narrowed, but he folded his hands on the top of his cane and said, “In a manner of speaking, yes, you’re dead. You died the night that I killed you. But you’re not exactly a corpse now, are you? You’re standing right in front of me and look alive enough for me to kill you again. It’s funny, I’ve never gotten to kill the same woman twice. I’ll savor that.”
Every instinct told me to just swing my axe right then. He wouldn’t be expecting it. I wasn’t sure I had it in me to kill, but if it meant saving my family, I was at least willing to try. But if I failed, I would have barely bought any time, and even taking him by surprise, I didn’t expect it to work. “But how was I made? How are vampires, we, made?”
He sighed and shook his head, his cane tapping harder, sending dirt flying up. “While I’ve never made another before, and greatly regret that you were my first, we drink someone’s blood and let them drink ours. It has to be enough to kill them, our blood should be the only blood in them, but I’m not sure if it has to be literal or if it’s a metaphorical thing. I simply know that it tends to work.”
“Tends to? It can fail?”
“Sometimes. I’ve been around long enough to have heard of it, though I’ve never seen it myself.”
I nodded like it was the most interesting thing I’d ever heard. I didn’t care much about monsters or how they worked. I wanted to know more about me, but he was the last person I would ask about that. “Then how was I made?” I remembered his finger, and his blood spraying me as I stabbed him. The taste had been vile, like concentrated evil, but apparently, it was the only reason I was still alive…or what passed for it.
“I don’t know.” His voice was scarcely more than a growl, and he bared his fangs, the very teeth that had torn my throat open. The sight scared me but not like I expected it to. When he’d killed me, I’d been more terrified than I’d ever been in my entire life. I was scared now, facing him, with the lives of everyone I loved on the line, but I didn’t feel traumatized. I knew I might die, that it was maybe more likely than not, and I knew that if I did, he’d kill them as well. That scared me. But seeing the last thing now that I’d seen before I’d died didn’t make me relive that trauma; it only made me sure that I couldn’t let my family go through the same thing. He was a monster, and as loath as I was to take a life, if I could, it was my duty to, and there was probably no one else in the whole world who could.
I swung the axe.
His cane flew up to block. That was exactly what I expected, which if I knew how to fight, should’ve meant that I was feinting and was going to come from another angle, but I’d put all my strength into that swing, hoping I could take his head, so it struck the cane full force with the shaft. If it had at least been the head, I’d have shortened his weapon, but he was a lot better than I was.
I pulled my axe free and leapt back, but he didn’t give me time to regroup. He rushed forward, darting his cane out, and I barely managed to knock it away, only for his fist to slam into my gut. I fell to my knees, and the cane struck me in the jaw. My world spun.
“I don’t know why you’re still trying to fight. You know you’re overpowered. You’re a child and one of lower stock at that. I have been at this for centuries. You come with an axe, expecting to take my head.” He spat, sounding more disgusted than angry. “I will kill you again. And I will make it slow.”
I pushed off the ground, and he rushed me to strike with the cane again, so I let him hit me. I could take as much pain as I needed. All that mattered was stopping him from coming after us. I brought my axe down on his leg, taking it clean off while his hit only sent my head ringing and spattered blood everywhere.
He screamed. I’d never been one for hurting others, but it was hard not to enjoy his pain. The world seemed to have dimmed some. I tried blinking and found my right eye didn’t seem to be working. I followed with another swing, but he leapt back.
I probably could have killed him then. Maybe. Possibly. Even with him missing a leg, I wasn’t certain I could win, but I knew that running felt like the worst option, even as I took it. Maybe I was scared, or maybe I felt that I’d done enough.
He chased me, and I let him. Every time I got too far away, I’d sniff him out and make sure I was close enough. I stayed away from people, trying to keep by the river. Whenever he started to approach the city, I’d charge him, and his scent would grow farther away. He wanted to kill me, but he’d need to feed to heal, and if he tried, I stopped him. For the first time since we’d met, he was scared. I wouldn’t let him eat. At the time, I hadn’t been sure if feeding would fix a wound that bad, but I knew it couldn’t make the situation better for me.
I spent the entire day at that game, tormenting him as he had me but avoiding an actual fight. Finally, when my family had time to be well out of reach, I slipped away the next time he went toward humans. I couldn’t manage to kill him, and I have no idea how many more suffered because of that.
When I made it to Sheffield, Mala panicked at the state of my face and gave me blood, and life went back to normal. We’d made it away clean, even if I knew he’d be coming back for us.