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acceptance, stages of grief leading to, 14–16
accommodation, 64, 66–67, 71
accumulation of wealth, values measured by, 105–7
Acharya, Aaron (survivor)
about story of, 149–53
facing chance for revenge, 158–59
lessons learned from, 204
reaching point of forgiveness, 167–69
as resource for Bhutanese refugees, 169–71
Acharya, Devi, 149–52, 158–59
acquired immunodeficiency syndrome (AIDS), 44, 136–38, 143
affirmations and self-help, 13–14
aging and Alzheimer’s disease, 124–26
Aging with Grace (Snowdon), 125
AIDS. See acquired immunodeficiency syndrome (AIDS)
Akerstream, Marc, 35
Allen, George, 147
Allen, Kris, 176
American Cancer Society, 2
American Counseling Association, 133
American Idol (TV show), 7, 175–77, 180–81, 192
American Journal of Epidemiology, 79
American Psychiatric Association, 133
American Psychological Association, 133
American Psychologist, 182
American School Counselor Association, 133
Amor, David, 40
Anderson Cooper 360 (TV program), 71
Annals of Behavioral Medicine, 20, 23
antigay movement. See Exodus International
Armstrong, Lance, 19, 179, 196
Asha. See Mevlana, Asha
assumptive worldview, 56–58, 60, 64, 68
automobile accidents, surviving trauma of, 2–4
Baez, Joan, 69
Bakunas, A. J., 35
Balkenende, Jan Pieter, 19
Barkley, Gnarls, 6
Bayh, B. Evan, III, 146–47
Beaumont Enterprise (newspaper), 195
Becker, Ernest, 105
“Before I die” reflections, 108–11, 113, 114, 117
Beijing Summer Olympics (2008), 19
Belfast, Ireland, 199–204
Ben-Ezra, Manachem, 135
Berendes, David, 45
Better (Weijden), 29
Bhutan ethnic conflict. See Acharya, Aaron
Black Culture and Black Consciousness (Levine), 129
Black Eyed Peas (music group), 7
Black Holocaust Museum, 139–41, 146–47
Blade Across America tour, 45–49
Blair, Tony, 69
Bless the Beasts and Children (Swarthout), 133
Blige, Mary J., 7, 178
blindness. See Lock, Alan
Bond, Julian, 141
Boreham, Matthew, 11, 29
Bradley, Bernard, 127
brain injury, surviving trauma of, 2–4. See also McGonigal, Jane; Wigal, Amanda
Bright-Sided (Ehrenreich), 22
Bring Them Home Now Tour (2005), 72
Brown, Laura, 142–43
Bush, George W., 54, 61, 68–70, 105–6
BusinessWeek (magazine), 149
Bussee, Michael (survivor)
about story of, 130–34
acceptance of his sexuality, 134–38
arriving at defining moment, 138–39
lessons learned from, 204
sexual reorientation therapy, 131–33, 143–45
transformation from guilt, 142–44
Butler, Steven, 125
Byock, Ira, 98
Cameron, Dr. James (survivor)
about story of, 119–23
divine intervention in saving, 123–26
forgiveness and reconciliation, 142, 146–47
leadership in civil rights movement, 126–30
lessons learned from, 204
opening Black Holocaust Museum, 139–41
Cameron, Virgil, 128, 129, 147
Cameron, Virginia, 139–40
Camp Casey, 69–70
Camus, Albert, quoted, 175
cancer
about surviving trauma of, 2–4
arriving at defining moment, 1–2
perception of risk, 36
positive thinking and hope, 17, 20–22, 45
religion and, 126, 135
screening and preemptive surgery, 177, 197–98
social support/support groups, 23, 79
See also Leon, Iram; Mevlana, Asha
Carpenter, John, 102, 103
Chambers, Alan, 145
Chang, Candy, 108–11, 113, 114, 117, 204
Chapman, Mike, 7
Charlebois, David, 103, 107–8, 111–12
Chasing Ghosts (Rieckhoff), 54
choices, life as a series of, 27, 111, 116, 177–78, 180–85, 189–98
civil rights movement, 121–23, 127–30, 146–47, 202
common sense, 17, 95
communal support of disaster relief, 82–86
Community of Peace People, 200–204
comparative optimism, 37, 39–40
completion tendency, 64
confidence/overconfidence, 39–41, 47–48, 50–51, 61–62, 178. See also grounded hope
Cooper, Gary, 133–34, 138, 143–44
Corrigan, Máiread (peace activist), 200–3
Coyne, James, 20–21, 23
Cozzolino, Philip, 113–14, 115
cultural beliefs and worldview, 99–101, 105–6, 112–15, 136, 182
Cultural Competence in Trauma Therapy (Brown), 142
cultural identity, sensitivity to, 142, 157, 171
Cummings, E. E., quoted, 1
Current Directions in Psychological Science, 83, 90–91
Danner, Deborah, 125
Dawkins, Richard, 124
death. See mortality
decision paralysis, 184–85
Deeter, Claude, 120–21, 141
Deeter, William, 141–42
defining moment, 1–2
delusions about risk and reality, 8, 28, 36–37, 39–41, 50–51, 73
depression
caused by trauma, 3, 37, 88
decision paralysis and, 181–85
recognizing symptoms, 90
relationship to forgiveness, 160–61
relationship to hope, 45
religion and coping with, 126, 132, 135, 138–39
See also mental health
Descartes, René, 124
deterioration effect, 84–86, 90
disability, dealing with, 45–49, 92
disaster relief and assistance, 82–86
Discovery Channel, 58–60
disorientation, 8, 88, 188–89
driving safety and risk, 33–34
drunken driving, 37–38
dual-existential systems, 113–14
Durbin, Dick, 147
economic difficulties, surviving trauma of, 2–4, 93–96
Eggum, Natalie, 44
Ehrenreich, Barbara, 22
Eisenberg, Nancy, 44
Eliot, T. S., quoted, 11
emotional support. See social support
End-of-Life Handbook, The (Byock), 98
Enright, Robert, 165–66
entrepreneurship, commonality with survivorship, 41–42
Escape from Evil (Becker), 105
estrangement and isolation, 86
Exodus International, 132–34, 138, 143–45
faith
arriving at sense of, 127
beneficial effects on health, 124–26
challenged by trauma, 55–58, 67, 135–36
maintained by changed worldview, 71
role in resilience, 137
See also religion and belief in God; spirituality
Feldman, David, 43
Fetcher, Con, 125
Fitchett, George, 135
Fitzgibbons, Richard, 165–66
Fleeson, William, 25
forgetting vs. forgiving, 168
forgiveness and reconciliation
harboring grudges and revenge, 154–55
as journey, 172
moving beyond unforgiveness, 157–58
process models, 165–67, 169
racial violence, 142, 146–47
theory and test for, 161–62
therapeutic approaches, 165–66
See also Acharya, Aaron; Wamariya, Clemantine
Forster, E. M., quoted, 97
Freud, Sigmund, 124
Friesen, Wallace, 125
Fritsche, Immo, 100–101
Future of an Illusion, The (Freud), 124
game-playing, problem-solving, 87–90
genocide, 164
giving up, benefits of, 24–26, 161–62
Glass, Kerrie, 44–45
goal disengagement, 25–26
Goldsmith, Marshall, 4, 41–42, 172
Good Samaritan relief efforts, 84–86
Gore, Al, 141
GQ (magazine), 71
Great Recession of 2009, 93–96
Greenberg, Jeff, 99, 100–101, 105, 112
grounded hope
applying formula for, 43–45, 48, 171–72
as growing into knowledge, 171–72
realistic vs. positive thinking, 27–30, 161–62
story of Amanda Wigal, 77–78
story of Asha Mevlana, 175–78
story of James Cameron, 130
See also confidence/overconfidence; hope/hopelessness
Guinness World Records, 29
Gulf War II, 53–55, 67–70
Haiti earthquake (2010), 82–86, 136
Hallett, Charlene, 34
halo effect, 179–80
handicap, dealing with, 45–49
Hanna, Timothy, 136
happiness, 26, 57, 64, 89, 124–25, 149
Hardball (TV program ), 70–71
Health Psychology, 78
health relief model, 16–17
Heckhausen, Jutta, 25
Helping Clients Forgive (Enright and Fitzgibbons), 165–66
Herbst-Damm, Kathryn, 78
Herman, Judith, 3
heroes, survivors as, 5, 7, 19, 29, 179, 195–96
hierarchical linear modeling, 137
HIV. See human immunodeficiency virus (HIV)
homosexuality. See Bussee, Michael
hope/hopelessness
about impact of trauma on, 3–4
avoiding false hope, 18
coping strategies, 44–45
link to forgiveness, 161, 172
maintaining illusion of control, 41–43
PTSD and loss of, 44–45
relationship to faith, 55–58
See also grounded hope
hospice care, 78–79
Huffington Post, The, 72
human immunodeficiency virus (HIV), 44, 136–38, 143
human rights abuses/activism, 58, 157, 161, 169–70, 178, 200
humility, 41, 202
Hurricane Hugo, 84–85
Hurricane Katrina, 45, 72, 116–17
inconsequential values, 1–2
inner resources. See grounded hope; personal control
inspiration, survivor stories as, 8–9, 12–13, 19, 135, 179–80, 201
interethnic conflict. See Acharya, Aaron; Wamariya, Clemantine
Iraq, war in, 53–55, 67–70
Iraq and Afghanistan Veterans of America, 71
Irish Republican Army (IRA), 199–204
Ironson, Gail, 136, 143
isolation and estrangement, 86
Iyengar, Sheena, 183–84, 191
Jackson, Reggie, 141
Janoff-Bulman, Ronnie, 56
Jay Z (stage name), 7
Jeremy (fiancé of Amanda), 75–76, 82, 91–92, 95–96
Jewish Holocaust, 139–40
Jonas, Eva, 100–101
Joseph, Stephen, 64
Journal of Behavioral Medicine, 136–37
Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 67
Journal of Economic Psychology, 101
Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, 132–33
Journal of Personality, 40, 42
Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 36, 84
Journal of Public Economics, 183
Journals of Gerontology, The, 125
Kahle-Wrobleski, Kristin, 43
Kamenica, Emir, 183–84
Kaniasty, Krzysztof, 82–83, 84–85, 89–91
Kaplan, Fran, 127, 140–41, 146
Kasser, Tim, 106
Keefe, Francis, 45
Keller, Helen, quoted, 75
Kennedy, Edward (“Ted”), 49, 147
Kerry, John, 61–63, 147
Kessler, Ronald, 152–53
Kierkegaard, Søren, 53, 183
King, Martin Luther, Jr., 129
Knight, Holly, 7
Kulik, James, 78
Lambert, Anthony, 34
Landrieu, Mary, 147
Lawler, Peter, 183
Lennon, Danny, 199
Leon, Iram (survivor)
about story of, 185–91
achieving the impossible, 193–96
lessons learned from, 198, 204
Leon, Kiana, 186–90, 193–95
Lerner, Michael, 57
leukemia. See van der Weijden, Maarten
Levine, Lawrence, 129
Lewis, John, 141
Lickerman, Alex, 102
life, as a series of choices, 27, 111, 116, 177–78, 180–85, 189–98
Linley, P. Alex, 64
Little Prince, The (Saint-Exupéry), quoted, 119
Living Beyond Limits (Spiegel), 23
living will, 98–99
Lock, Alan (survivor)
about story of, 11–12
accepting blindness, 14–16
arriving at defining moment, 29–30
arriving at goal for the future, 24
facing challenge of trip, 26–27
lessons learned from, 204
social support, 80
willingness to risk, 42
Longitudinal Aging Study Amsterdam, 79
“Long-Lived Nuns” (Time, 1959), 125
Ludwig, Thomas, 154
lymphoblastic leukemia, 17–18
macular degeneration, 14–15
Matt, George E., 114–15
Matthews, Chris, 70–71
maximizer, decision-making, 190–91
McGonigal, Jane (survivor), 87–91
McKeown, Ciaran, 200
meditation, 4, 197
Meet the Press (TV program), 71
mental health
forgiveness and, 160
giving up vs. persistence, 24–25
hope and, 43
impact of trauma on, 152–55
religion and, 126, 135
resilience and, 89
sexual reorientation therapy and, 132–33
social support and, 79–80
See also depression
Messias, Erick, 155
Mevlana, Asha (survivor)
arriving at her defining moment, 1–2
beginning transformation, 4–7
decisions and choices, 180–81, 190–93, 196–98
lessons learned from, 198, 204
support from others, 80
willingness to risk, 41–42, 177–78
Meyers, Lawrence, 114
Miller, Gregory, 24
Minor, Ricky, 176
money, as measure of values, 105–7
Morissette, Alanis, 6
mortality
about social support and, 1–2, 78–79
avoiding topic of, 98–99
“Before I die” reflections, 110–11
cultural perceptions, 100, 105–6
denial and fear of, 100–103, 113–14
positive thinking and, 22–23
mortality salience, 101, 114
music, surviving trauma with, 4–5, 6–7, 26, 80, 177–78, 180–81, 192–93, 196–97
Myth America: 10 Greatest Myths of the Robber Class and the Case for Revolution (Sheehan), 72–73
Mythbusters (TV series), 58–60, 73
Myth of Sisyphus and Other Essays, The (Camus), quoted, 175
narcissism, 41
National Association of School Psychologists, 133
National Association of Social Workers, 133
National Comorbidity Survey, 153, 155
National Institute of Justice, 153
National Limb Bank, 49
National Violence Against Women Survey, 153
Nazi Holocaust, 139–40
Neuroimaging Clinics of North America (journal), 2
Nietzsche, Friedrich, 183
Night (Wiesel), 164
9/11 terrorist attacks, 105–8, 112, 114–16
Nobel Peace Prize, 203–4
Norris, Fran, 82–83, 84–85, 89–91
Northern Ireland peace process, 199–204
Not Another Mother’s Child (Sheehan), 65
Nun Study of Aging and Alzheimer’s disease, 124–26
Obama, Barack, 147, 172
Occupy Wall Street movement (2011), 72
O’Grady, Kari, 136
Olympic Games, 17, 19, 28, 179, 196
online game-playing, 87–90
Operation Iraqi Freedom, 53–55, 67–70
Oprah Winfrey Leadership Academy for Girls, 172
Oprah Winfrey Network (OWN), 145
Oprah Winfrey Show, The (TV program), 164–65, 171
Our America with Lisa Ling (TV program), 145
overaccommodation, 66–67
Oxfam (relief organization), 83
Paradox of Choice, The (Schwartz), 190
patriotism, 54, 58, 65–66
Peace People’s movement, 199–204
Peale, Norman Vincent, 13
Penninx, Brenda, 79
Perino, Dana, 66
Perry, Linda, 7
persistence
power of positive thinking, 22
reaching point of giving up, 24–26
See also resilience
personal control, 8, 39–40, 45, 77–78
pessimism, 3–4, 12, 16, 27
physical abuse, surviving trauma of, 2–4, 153
Pieretti, Casey (survivor)
about illusion of risk, 31–32, 34–37
arriving at defining moment, 37–39
challenge of Blade Across America tour, 45–49
creating persona of “super-cripple,” 49
lessons learned from, 179, 204
metamorphosis into stunt work, 49–51
political persecution, 149–53, 158–59, 167–69
Porcelain (rock band), 7, 180–81, 192
positive change, 5–6, 89. See also transformation
positive illusion, 40
positive thinking
about survivorship and, 7–9
arguments for/against, 13–14
benefits of giving up, 24–26
dangers of simplistic view, 20–24, 42–43, 132
story of Alan Lock, 11–12, 16
story of Casey Pieretti, 39
story of Iram Leon, 195–96
story of Maarten van der Weijden, 17–21
thinking realistically versus, 27–29, 204
posttraumatic growth, 5–6, 77–80
posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD)
about its origins in trauma, 3–4
coping strategies for mitigating, 44–45
effects of, overcoming, 55, 66–67, 89
experiencing effects vicariously, 114–15
sexual orientation therapy, 143–45
See also Rieckhoff, Paul
Power of Positive Thinking, The (Peale), 13
powerlessness, trauma as affliction of, 3–4
Psychological Bulletin, 20
Psychological Inquiry, 113
Psychological Science, 24, 184, 191
Psychological Trauma, 67
Psychology Today, 102
Psychosomatic Medicine, 20
Putin, Vladimir, 69
Pyszczynski, Tom, 99, 105, 112
racial prejudice and discrimination, 121–23, 127–30, 146–47
Ranchor, Adelita, 23
Rand, Kevin, 43
rape and molestation. See sexual trauma
Real Time with Bill Maher (TV program), 71
Red Hot Chili Peppers (music group), 6
refocusing on life. See transformation
refugees/refugee camps
Bhutan ethnic conflict, 158–59, 167–71
Rwanda ethnic conflict, 157, 162–65, 171
Regan, Michael, 34
religion and belief in God
about survivorship and, 123–24, 129–30
health effects, 125–26, 136–37
reconciling sexuality, 134–35
separating faith from, 134–37, 139
as spiritual journey, 142–43
See also faith; spirituality
Resick, Patricia, 67
resilience
about surviving trauma through, 3–4
developing skill of, 89–91
inspiring hope and growth, 7–9
role of faith, 137
See also persistence
revenge, 154, 161, 166, 167–68. See also forgiveness and reconciliation
Rieckhoff, Paul (survivor)
about story of, 53–55
challenging false pretenses of Iraq, 61–63
changing his assumptive worldview, 63–67, 70–71, 73
lessons learned from, 204
support from others, 80
Rihanna (stage name, Robyn Rihanna Fenty), 7
risk
about illusion of, 31–32
beginning transformation, 4–5
delusions about seriousness of, 36–37
health relief model, 16–17
perceptions influence behaviors, 33–36
positive illusion of control and, 39–45, 49–51
realistic vs. unrealistic, 27–28
Rollison, Deborah, 136
Ruiz, Manuel, 136
Rumsfeld, Donald, 65
Russell, Bertrand, 124
Rwanda ethnic conflict. See Wamariya, Clemantine
Saini, Anil, 155
Saint-Exupéry, Antoine de, quoted, 119
Salecl, Renata, 182
Sallquist, Julie, 44
Samboceti, Jamie, 114
Sartre, Jean-Paul, 183
satisfier, decision-making, 190–91
Savage, Adam, 58–60
Schnicke, Monica, 67
School Sisters of Notre Dame, 124–26
Schreiber-Pan, Heidi, 136
Schwartz, Barry, 182–83, 190–91
Schweingruber, David, 13, 21
Seacrest, Ryan, 176
self-aggrandizement, 40
self-confidence. See confidence/overconfidence
self-help and affirmations, 13–14
September 11 terrorist attacks, 105–8, 112, 114–16
Serovich, Julianne M., 132–33
sexual reorientation therapy, 131–33, 143–45
sexual trauma
about surviving, 2–4
impact on faith and beliefs, 135–36
mental health and, 153–54
Shafir, Eldar, 184
Sharpton, Al, 69
Sheehan, Casey, 65
Sheehan, Cindy (antiwar activist)
about story of, 65–66
accommodation as impossibility, 66–67
lessons learned from, 204
loss of assumptive worldview, 68–69
political activism against Iraq war, 69–73
Sheen, Martin, 69
Sheldon, Kennon, 106
Shipp, Thomas, 119–22, 127
Sinato, Philip, 155
Smith, Abe, 119–22, 127
Snider, Dee, 178
Snowdon, David, 124–26
social accountability, 54, 58, 62–63, 71
Social Psychiatry and Psychiatric Epidemiology, 155
social resilience, 89
social support
about role of, 8
accommodation, role in, 67
benefits from, 79–80
connection to mortality, 78–79
deterioration effect, 85, 90
identifying need for, 88–89
perception vs. reality, 90–91, 95
resilience during illness, 137, 177–78
Stage 1, 80–81, 82–83
Stage 2, 82–87
Socrates, quoted, 31
Solomon, Sheldon, 99, 105, 112
South African apartheid, 149, 157–58, 160–61, 167–68
Spiegel, David, 23
spirituality, 8, 55, 114, 126, 131–32. See also faith; religion and belief in God
stages of grief, 15–16
Staples, Angela, 114
Stein, Dan, 154
Sugar Busters (Steward, et al.), 104–5
suicide, 88–89, 154
SuperBetter (video game), 89–90
supportive-expressive therapy, 23
survivorship
about defining moment, 1–2
accommodation and, 64
commonality with entrepreneurship, 41–42
creating positive change, 5–6
defined, 2–4
finding hope and growth, 7–9
journey from survivor to, 178–80
support from others, 78–82, 95–96
survivors as heroes, 19, 29, 195–96
Swarthout, Glendon, 133
Tapster, Dan, 60, 73
Taylor, Shelley, 40, 42
Tennen, Howard, 23
terror management theory, 99–100, 105–6, 113–15
terrorism
about surviving trauma of, 2–4
September 11 attacks, 105–8, 112, 114–15
train bombings in Madrid, 115
texting while driving, 33–34
Thomas Aquinas, 124
Thorndike, Edward, 179
Time (magazine), 125
Time of Terror, A (Cameron), 128
Tonight Show, The (TV show), 7, 197
torture, 151, 159, 169–70
transformation
about trauma and positive change, 2–4, 198, 201, 203
developing inner strength, 5–6
as grace to find personal meaning, 115–16
integrating changed worldview with reality, 63–64
New York following 9/11 attacks, 115
role of faith, 130, 135, 144–45
Trans-Siberian Orchestra (rock opera group), 192, 196
Trauma and Recovery (Herman), 3
Troubles in Northern Ireland, 199–204
true hope. See grounded hope
trust, trauma as challenge to, 67–68
Tutu, Desmond, 149, 157–58, 160–61, 167–68
Tversky, Amos, 184
Twain, Mark, quoted, 31
Twister Sister (music group), 6
Tyranny of Choice, The (Salecl), 182
unforgiveness. See forgiveness and reconciliation
United Nations, 2, 152, 168–69
United States Holocaust Memorial Council, 172
University of North Carolina, Charlotte, 5
University of Pennsylvania, 20
University of Warwick, England, 5, 64
urban legends, 58–60
values
achieving inner growth through trauma, 5–6
arriving at defining moment, 1–2
external trappings as measure of, 105–7
identifying “Before I die” meaning of, 110–11
involve making choices, 189–90, 193
making sacrifices and compromises, 192–93
money as measure of, 105–7
social accountability, 54, 58, 62–63, 71
trauma as challenge to, 55–58, 63–64
trauma as initiating change, 203–4
van der Weijden, Maarten (survivor)
about story of, 17–20
arriving at grounded hope, 27–29
lessons learned from, 179, 204
Vander Laan, Kelly, 154
Vázquez, Carmelo, 114–15
victim blaming, 57
victimization, 153–54
virtual game-playing, 87–90
Walker, Michael, 111–12
Wall Street Journal, The, 195
Wamariya, Claire, 156–57, 163–64
Wamariya, Clemantine (survivor)
about story of, 155–57
journey toward forgiveness, 165–67, 171–73
lessons learned from, 204
memories of Rwandan massacre, 162–64
reunion with parents, 164–65
Watkins, Paul (survivor)
about story of, 97–98, 103–5
arriving at defining moment, 107–8, 111–13
changing his assumptive worldview, 115–17
lessons learned from, 204
wealth, values measured by accumulation of, 105–7
Weinstein, Neil, 36, 38–40
Welch, Stephen, 155
Wells, Rachael, 191
What Doesn’t Kill Us (Joseph), 64
Wiesel, Elie, 164, 172
Wigal, Amanda (survivor)
about story of, 75–77
emotional support following trauma, 77–82
lessons learned from, 204
loss of support over time, 82–85
path to recovery, 91–96
support, reality vs. perception, 85–87, 95
Wigal, Iris, 78, 91–96
Williams, Betty (peace activist), 199–204
Winfrey, Oprah, 164–65
Witvliet, Charlotte, 154
World Health Organization (WHO), 154
Wrosch, Carsten, 24–25
Zimmerman, Quinn, 83