Week
17

You’ve Gotta Ask

AFFIRMATIONS

for

Meditation and Reflection

I am asking for what I want and need with a positive expectation that I will get a YES.

I am being clear and specific when I ask for something and I’m getting exactly what I want—or something better.

I have both the capacity and tenacity to persevere, so I keep on asking until I succeed.

You’ve got to ask. Asking is, in my opinion, the world’s most powerful and neglected secret to success and happiness.

—PERCY ROSS
Self-made multimillionaire
and philanthropist

What’s the worst that can happen if you don’t have the courage and self-confidence to ask for what you want? For one, you’ll never get it, and two, you may be blocking the very thing that will lead to your ultimate success. And if you do ask? You’ll get a yes or a no. A no just means that wasn’t the right door and you must continue to knock until the right door opens. A yes, on the other hand—well, that’s what you get when you ask the right people and you ask enough times.

Asking is one of the most powerful success principles of all, yet it’s still a challenge that holds most people back.

Here’s an important point to remember when you are asking for what you want. Sometimes what we think we want isn’t the best thing for us; sometimes we need to reevaluate what we are asking for and why. And sometimes, because we are asking in faith that we will receive it, we get more than we asked for—we get something better.

I am asking for what I want and need with a positive expectation that I will get a YES.

There’s a science for asking for what you want or need in life. Mark Victor Hansen and I have written a whole book about it called The Aladdin Factor. Here are some quick tips from the book to get you started.

• Ask as if you expect to get it. Ask with the positive expectation that you have already been given it—like it’s a done deal.
• Assume you can. Don’t ever assume against yourself.
• Ask someone who can give it to you. Research who that is.
• Be clear and specific. When it comes to money, ask for a definite amount. When it comes to requesting a specific behavior, say exactly what you want the person to do.
• Ask repeatedly. One of the most important principles of success is persistence. When you’re asking others to participate in the fulfillment of your goals, some people are going to say no. More than likely, they have very good reasons for declining. It’s not a reflection on you.
• Don’t assume you’ll get a no when you haven’t even asked yet. That’s rejecting yourself before anyone else has even had a chance. Take the risk—if you get a no, nothing has changed and you are no worse off than before. And you might just get a yes!

I am being clear and specific when I ask for something and I’m getting exactly what I want—or something better.

Let’s do a little exercise to get you more comfortable with asking for what you want.

Make a list of all the things you want but you haven’t asked for—include things relative to home, work, or anywhere else you can think of. Beside each one, write down why you haven’t asked for it—what’s holding you back? Then write down what you’re missing out on by not asking (a good night’s sleep, extra time with your family, a promotion). Then, write down the benefits you would gain if you did ask (emotional support, financial gain, help with the housework). Now, do that exercise for everything in the following categories in Week 3: Decide What You Want to Be, Do, and Have:

• Your Finances
• Your Job and Career
• Fun Time and Recreation
• Your Health and Fitness
• Your Relationships
• Hobbies and Personal Time
• Your Contributions to the Community

I get that sometimes people are afraid of looking needy or looking foolish, but mostly they are simply afraid of rejection—they are afraid of hearing the word “no.” Stop taking it so personally. You need to have not only the capacity, but the tenacity. To be successful, you have to ask!

I have both the capacity and tenacity to persevere, so I keep on asking until I succeed.