I SLEPT. I don’t know how long, but as I rose slowly into wakefulness, all that seemed important was the amount of time I’d wasted that could have been spent in Griffin’s company. I rolled to the right, meaning to rise, and encountered a large, solid body next to mine.
“Good morning.”
I blinked against the inky darkness of the room, seeing the sheen of stars still in the sky. It must be very early morning.
“I’m sorry, Griffin. I didn’t mean to fall asleep on you.” I shifted and felt the coarse weave of the bed linen against my naked skin. He must have undressed me as I slept.
“Stress can cause weariness. As can malnutrition and whatever’s been introduced to your body to keep you compliant.”
That brought me awake fast. “What do you mean?”
“Think, Helios. Whenever you get stressed, whether from too much anger or fear, or even humor, don’t you become sleepy? Earlier you slept while under the table.”
I thought about that and realized it was true. All these years I’d been oblivious to that reaction, yet he’d spotted it within hours.
“I imagine you have a cerebral implant that keeps you placid. It probably also took your memories.”
At that, a sharp spike of pain ran through my heart. Slowly I dropped back onto the hard pillow. I could feel him next to me, a warm, solid presence in the darkness. Impulsively I turned into him, seeking the comfort of his body. When his arm settled comfortably around my shoulder, I knew.
“We were lovers.”
I tried to see him in the darkness, to see if he smiled or frowned. I saw only his profile against the night.
“Long ago. We were young.”
“In school? The military?” I wasn’t certain how old I was, but he seemed older. More competent.
“In the army. As is the custom of our people, our first lovers are chosen from our brothers or sisters in arms. We fight better next to those we love.” He ran his hand down the length of my braid. “This is new. I think I like it.” He tugged and I winced.
“It isn’t a handle.”
Immediately he let it loose.
“I’m sorry, Griffin. It’s just….” I trailed off, knowing he understood. He’d used it earlier when he thought I was just a whore. As had countless partners who had preceded him.
“Sometime I’d like to see it loose.” His hand rested on my braid again, but now he stroked gently. “It must be beautiful when it’s loose.”
We lay quietly for a time, and a comfortable drowsiness crept up on me once again. Maybe it was indeed a reaction to stress, but frankly, I believed it had to do with the absence of the chastity ring. It was hard to get a good night’s sleep with that thing strangling me all the time. Yet there was still so much I needed to know.
“How did you recognize me?”
My eyes had adjusted to the darkness; I could see his profile against the faint light of the window. His eye gleamed, and I noticed that he lay between me and the entrance to the room.
“That trick with your teeth.” He grinned, his teeth flashing white against his dark skin. “You always knew just how to send me over the edge.” He chuckled hoarsely. I couldn’t help grinning back.
“I’ve never done that to anyone else, you know. It just seemed to be the right thing to do.”
His smile faded a bit then, and I knew he was thinking about the years I’d served as a slave… a whore. I rose on my elbow to look at him. I could feel the weight of his guilt.
“Griffin. I survived it. I survived it with all the grace I could muster. Please allow me that.”
He swallowed hard. He choked back all the words that threatened to come forth. It was an admirable effort. Instead of speaking, he pulled me tightly to his body, and I reveled in that hold.
“How did we end?” I whispered.
“Not how… why.” The hand around my shoulder stroked my skin soothingly. Somewhere in my brain, I wanted sex. Perhaps my desire was some sort of soul-deep memory. His touch brought forth another need as well—the need to be held and comforted. I laid my head on his shoulder, feeling… safe.
“It happened fairly quickly. You expected an army career, but one of the Sun Priests had a vision. You were called to serve in the temple, and I was promoted to officer status. Your uncle deemed it wise to provide you with a suitable wife, and you were wed to Cloris. A few years later, Suzan and I married.”
That shot through me like an arrow. Married? He was married?
“Suzan was killed during the retreat. I wasn’t able to save her.” He looked bleak. Beaten.
“I’m sorry, Griffin.”
I got the feeling he was carrying a heavy burden of guilt. He must have been at my side when his family was killed. My stomach cramped. My heart experienced horror my mind couldn’t process.
“My children survived. They are living with my cousin and her husband.”
“Good. Good.” I hugged him tightly for a moment. “You must have sons.” I should have known this. I should know his children. But I didn’t.
“Daughters. Twins.” I could sense the smile in his voice. “One is fair like their mother, the other is dark like me.”
I lay a palm flat on his bare chest, feeling the beat of his heart. It sped up slightly at my touch. He knew what I was asking, even though I didn’t know the words.
“Your son’s name is Alexander. He favors you, with copper hair and gray eyes.”
My eyes were wide open in the darkness as I tried to visualize the child I had no memory of. “I guess I didn’t want to burden him with a silly name like mine.”
He laughed out loud, and I knew I was correct.
“Actually, his name is Helios Alexander Dayspring. Your family insisted on the first name. You insisted on the second.”
Past the bulk of his body, I watched the slowly graying sky. The outlines of the city towers were etched black against the horizon. I’d never thought of the city as having any sort of beauty, but there it was. Black velvet against silver gray, tiny stars twinkling with unsuppressed hope. Even the air smelled good. Why hadn’t I noticed these things before?
“Griffin.”
He turned his head slightly to look at me. I wondered if he’d slept at all. There was much to discuss, much to do if I was to get off this rock, but right now, this moment was out of time. It was ours, and no one could intrude.
“I know I have no right to ask, and I know you may not have the right to accept, but… I find that I need you.”
He let out a slight breath of air, as though he’d taken a blow.
“You have every right to ask.” He said, his voice husky with emotion.
“I’m not asking as your prince… or whatever. I don’t even remember you or what we had. But right now, I need touch. I need your touch, Griffin Hawke. If I had a room full of the most beautiful men and women from which to choose, you would be my choice.”
His hand settled lightly over my mouth then, and I knew that my tendency to babble on must be a habit of old. But then he drew his hand away, trailing heavy fingers over my lips. Much of my body was soft and pampered like a woman’s. My muscles were strong, but my skin was soft. The feel of his callused fingers drew shivers over my spine. For the first time in recent memory, my cock was free to express its happiness, and it did, rising up to meet his wandering hand.
He grasped me in his rough palm, then pumped and pulled, and his whiskered chin dragged along the skin of my chest. He licked my nipple, and then bit it hard enough to hurt. My back arched, pushing my cock tighter into his palm.
My breath shuddered from my chest on a moan when he fondled my balls, pulling them forward to meet my rigid, straining cock.
“How do you want me, Helios?”
My eyes popped open, and I looked down at his dark form. That was my question! My head dropped back on the pillow as options ran through my mind. What did I want from this big, hard man? What did I want for our first time together?
“Come lie on top of me, Griffin. Hold me.”
I brought my knee up, making room for him as he settled his weight on top of me. “Is this how we used to do it?”
He pressed a kiss on my lips. “Later.” His grin told me this position was new to us. He kissed me again, his tongue a rough intruder into my mouth. I sucked and bit and pulled, enjoying the harsh feel of his beard. My skin was baby smooth thanks to a permanent depilatory treatment. I had no beard, no hair anywhere on my body, and I never would again. It would be a permanent reminder of my time spent as a slave. One of many such reminders.
He left my mouth; his journey took him to my jaw. His tongue swirled into my ear, bringing my hips up to buck against his. Our cocks dueled; he raised his hips just enough to give them space to tangle and embrace. Our balls pressed together tightly and then released.
I wrapped my arms around him, lost in the comfort and bliss of simple intimacy.
We rolled, trading places, and he went so easily that I knew the movement was expected. I straddled his hips and looked down at the dark beauty beneath me. His ebony eye glittered with emotion, and those harsh, sensual lips parted slightly. The lines beside his nose grew deep as his face went dark with passion.
Continuing the visual tour, I gazed down to view the broad, muscular shoulders. His chest was layered with lean, sinewy muscle, and his arms were hard and delineated. He didn’t carry a spare ounce of fat on his body.
His belly was sculpted and flat; faint scars peppered his dark skin. They were remnants of battle, though some were the tokens of something much darker and uglier. My mind skittered away from that.
I scooted back to look at his lean hips; dusky hair trailed from his chest down his belly, leading the eye to the dark thatch that surrounded his cock.
I pressed my hips forward, catching our shafts in my fist. My light to his dark, my circumcision to his natural.
“That’s new.” His gaze was hot and fierce.
“My cock? I’m fairly certain it’s always been there.”
His grin flashed briefly. “No Lio, you’ve been cut. Circumcised.”
“Oh.” I stared at the smooth column of my shaft. “That must have hurt.” As though agreeing, my manhood softened. He flexed his hip and nudged me, which quickly solved that problem. I was hard again, and once more fascinated with the contrasts between us. I thrust, running our cocks side by side. He gasped as the heads caught on the sensitive ridges. I was fairly certain we could come this way… very quickly.
But that wasn’t what I wanted right now. I knelt between his legs and raised his knees. I wet my finger and pressed it to his tight hole. He clenched, which made me grin. My pirate wasn’t accustomed to being plundered.
I found my discarded trousers and dug into the pocket, pulling out the tube of lubricant that was my constant companion when U’shma took me out on the town. Quickly I lubed his ass, and then moved on to my cock. I was patient and gentle, letting him grow accustomed to a finger, and then another stroking into his body.
He didn’t protest as I arrowed my cock and pressed for entry. However, his very being radiated discomfort and resistance. He bore down; his gasp was muffled as I invaded him just the barest inch.
His ass was tight around my cockhead, and after ages of denial, I wanted to pump, to thrust, to spill deep inside his body. But more than that, I wanted it to be good for us both. He groaned when I withdrew, and then took the penetration stoically when I returned. I had to wonder if this was the first time for Griffin.
I stroked into him carefully, finding the little gland that gave such pleasure and watched the pain on his face melt away into shocked bliss. He began to rock into my thrusts, tightening his ass on my shaft. My pleasure was rising, and my poor abused cock was near its limit. His was rigid and heavy on his belly, a pearl of liquid bearing witness to his pleasure. I don’t think he expected to like it so much. Clearly my skills had grown since we were last together. I grinned when he clasped my hips, trying to control my movement.
When I could bear no more without surrendering to orgasm, I withdrew.
He cursed in protest, and then took a deep breath as I lubed his cock. He was big and thick, and I knew this was going to hurt, but the pain would be the companion to pleasure. In honesty, I craved his possession.
Wordlessly I rolled to my back, raising my knees for him.
If you’d asked just hours ago, I’d have said I never wanted to be fucked by a man ever again in my life, but somehow this man was the exception. He knelt between my knees, forcing them farther apart, raising my hips just a hair.
He knew what he was about.
He pressed, and after a moment of resistance, my ass got over its reluctance to be fucked. I relaxed, feeling his massive cock gently work its way in.
That was it. He was gentle. He probably wasn’t always gentle in bed, but right now, I couldn’t bear anything else. He knew that. Just as the burn became too much, he drew back, lubed some more, and started the penetration once again. As I relaxed, the pain melted away into something delightfully dark and wonderfully delicious. I clenched my jaw against a guttural, animalistic groan.
“I’m in.” His voice was gruff. He slowly lowered his body till we were face-to-face. We didn’t fuck then; we kissed, deep and slow. He made love to me, cherishing me and letting me take all the comfort and strength I needed. My cock was trapped between our bodies; it hardened once again. He began to thrust, and within seconds, it was weeping and ready.
The old bed squeaked under our tempo, and I smelled the night air mixed with his sweat and the spice of the incense that scented my hair. I grabbed his tight, hard ass with one hand and buried the other into his thick hair. I felt the leather tie of his eye patch at the back of his head. He brought his hand to the mattress on either side of my shoulders, rising up to watch my face. That slight shift in position had him gliding over the gland buried inside my body, driving me into twisting, mindless bliss.
I was going to go before him, and with great effort I kept my eyes open, watching him watching me. I bucked under him, fighting to hold his cock deep in my body, savoring the sting where our skin slapped together. He let me set the pace, and I fought to hold back. I fought to draw the moment out as long as possible, to grasp and savor the shining moment of surrender.
When I came, my back arched, and I slammed down on him, my ass squeezing him tight. My semen shot between our bodies, a slick curtain that dripped from his belly to mine. I cried out in pleasure, in relief. I cried out with an emotion that had no name, at least not in the bleak existence I’d lived in for so long. And then I was finished, my body going lax, my breath coming harsh and fast.
Satisfied with my climax, he increased his tempo, and his powerful thrusts drove me up the bed till I grabbed the metal headboard to hold myself steady. He lowered his head and released a shuddering breath, his hips digging into mine. I felt the hot spill of his cum, the sudden blooming of sweat on his skin. His groan was rough and harsh in my ear. He pounded into my ass, suddenly releasing all the heat and the power he’d been withholding. He roared like a man in pain, freezing and then pumping into my body again. His muscles shook with tension, and I held on, breathless at his abandon.
Finally he collapsed, the full weight of his body resting on mine. I wrapped my arms around him as he recovered. I felt his cock slip from my body, and still I held on, reluctant to let this moment go.
He was weak in my arms—weak and spent. At this moment, he needed me to hold him, and it felt so very, very good. We were both limp and sated, and if an army had broken in on our stolen moment, we’d have been at a loss to fight. At that moment, we were helpless.
And you know? It was perfect.