Mac had always thought that he was content with his lot in life. Sure, he knew that he was never going to conform to the whole Hollywood chick-flick idea of happy. But all in all, things were good.
He had a job that he loved and one that he was damn good at. He had a nice brownstone in New York City, and a car that gave him a lot of pleasure to drive. He enjoyed season tickets to both the Yankees and the Rangers, and had more women than he knew what to do with.
There’d been a time when an ideal night for him was either dinner at some fancy restaurant with a beautiful woman and sex back at her place—always her place—or drinks after work with some of the guys from the firm, which could get out of hand, but what did that matter? It’s not like he had anyone to answer to.
If he felt like playing a game of hockey in the men’s league he’d joined or heading out of town to ski, he did it. If he wanted to do nothing but chill in his house and work on the renovations he’d started, he did that. But no matter what, the one thing that was constant in his life was that in the morning, he was alone.
That was it. All she wrote.
It was the life he’d built—the life he’d wanted—which was why he found it a little weird that having Liam around all the time kinda fit. His sister Becca had returned a well over a week ago, a little more sad, a little more broken, but at least she was officially separated from her bastard husband. And though he hadn’t suggested it or thought about it really, he’d started swinging by his mom’s every morning to pick up Liam and bring him to work with him.
The kid was bright, and he liked to learn. And funny enough, Liam liked math and he liked to draw.
Even funnier? Mac liked to teach him.
But Boston, well hell, Lily St. Clare had to be the most perfect woman on the planet. Hands down. He’d never met anyone like her.
Aside from the fact that her intense blue eyes, long, blond hair, and amazing ass would make any man happy, she had a great sense of humor and was quick to laugh. Her trucker mouth came out occasionally, and damn if he didn’t like that too. She was independent and had her own money, so she wasn’t always whining for him to buy her something.
And the sex was mind-blowing. Christ, just this morning he’d joined her in the shower and things had quickly gotten out of hand.
Mackenzie had lost control—they both had—and by the time he realized it, there was barely enough time to pull out. He’d come hard, there against the wet tiles—like a fucking teenager without any control—but Christ, she’d felt good.
Too damn good.
And for the first time since he’d come back to Crystal Lake and Lily, he was starting to think of things he probably shouldn’t think about, because there was no way any of that shit would ever work out.
It was nothing permanent that he was thinking about, Christ no, but it was something more than what they had. Like maybe Lily should be spending all of her time at the cottage. The lighting was good for her painting, and he liked the thought of her there, dressed in one of his old T-shirts, when he was at work.
The problem was he didn’t know how to proceed with that train of thought. This was uncharted territory for Mac, and considering the state of bliss his buddies were living in, it’s not as if they’d be good for any kind of advice.
Shit, they’d have him married before the end of the year.
“Like that will ever happen,” he muttered.
Yet here he was, three weeks after he’d started up with Boston, getting ready to take part in a canoe race around the lake with Lily and Liam. The Race Of A Thousand Canoes was an annual charity event put on by the church. It was a loud, bustling family event from what he could tell, which was totally different than the memories in his head.
When he was a teenager, he and Cain used to race the Edwards twins around the lake, drinking beer and smoking cigarettes once they were out of sight of Pastor Lancaster. And now, Cain was set to race with Michael because Maggie was so pregnant she was as big as a house—still gorgeous, but shit, Mac was convinced there were at least three kids in there.
And joining them in another canoe was Raine and Jake, with their hyper retriever, Gibson.
When the hell had everything changed?
“I gave Liam a cooler with snacks and stuff.” Becca stood beside him, shading her eyes as she watched Liam and Lily discuss the merits of placement. Liam was sure that he should be in the front because he was the smallest, while Lily was pretty sure he should be in the middle to even things out.
“Thanks,” Mac said. “Where’s Mom?”
Becca shook her head. “I don’t know. She got a phone call this morning and left a note saying she had to go meet up with someone.” She chuckled. “It’s not like her to be so mysterious. Maybe she’s got a boyfriend.”
“Yeah. Because she’s finally ready to move on with her life,” Mac said dryly.
“Hmm,” Becca replied softly.
His sister looked tired. “Are things alright with you?” They hadn’t really talked since she came back from Iowa, but he knew she was looking for a job and that she’d be staying in Crystal Lake for the immediate future.
“I’m…I’m going to be alright.” She paused. “So, Lily seems real nice.”
Mac stared at Becca a few seconds longer, but he wasn’t going to call her out on a deflection. He new she wasn’t ready to talk about stuff, and this wasn’t really the place either.
“She is.”
“So would she be considered your girlfriend?”
Okay, he was all for letting the deflection slide, but man, he wasn’t real up on discussing his personal life with his sister. Jesus, just the day before his mother had asked if he wanted to bring Lily for dinner one night. He’d politely refused because he wasn’t ready to mix his family and Boston—not yet anyway.
Then why the hell am I in this canoe race with Lily and Liam?
“She’s a friend,” he answered tightly. He didn’t want them making assumptions on stuff he wasn’t even sure about.
“Liam likes her a lot. He says that she’s given him a few art lessons and that she”—Becca paused—“smells real nice.”
Well, Mac couldn’t fault his nephew there.
“Draper, if you don’t get your canoe in the water, you’re never going to have a chance to win.”
Mac glanced over to Jake. “Whatever, Edwards. You’ve never managed to beat me before.”
Jake had his arm around Raine and kissed her on the nose before flipping Mackenzie the bird. “I’ve never had such a pretty copilot either.”
“Do you want me to make something for dinner?”
“No,” he said sharply, glancing at Becca. “I have no idea how long the race will take, but when it’s over, I’ll drop Liam off, and then Lily and I are heading back to the cottage.”
She frowned. “But it’s Saturday night. I just thought that maybe a barbecue would be fun. You don’t need to get your damn panties in a knot.” She took a step back. “What’s your problem anyway?”
“My problem?” That thing that had been buzzing in his head for the last few weeks suddenly sharpened into something hot and angry. He glared at his sister. “My problem is that my private life is private. I don’t need to bring Lily by for dinner or hang out with you guys in the backyard and talk about the good ol’ days because we both know there weren’t any. Why are you so interested in getting to know her anyway?”
“Does it really surprise you that I want to get to know the woman you’re spending so much time with?”
Mac didn’t care that Mrs. Avery and her husband were staring at him, or that old man Lawrence was frowning at him either. He just wanted everyone to leave him the hell alone. Was it childish? Maybe. But he didn’t give a rat’s ass.
“I think, Becca, that instead of focusing on me, you should be getting your shit together. I don’t think you need to be worrying about family dinners that would suck or nice relaxed barbecues that we both know would never happen. You’ve got a kid and you’re on your own, so maybe a job might be something to think about. That sounds like a brilliant fucking idea to me. I’m gone after Labor Day, so this thing with me and Lily St. Clare has an expiration date. Your mess of a life doesn’t.”
Becca’s face whitened, and as soon as the words left his mouth, Mac wanted to snatch them back.
“You’re an asshole, Mackenzie. A complete and utter asshole.”
He stared into his sister’s eyes, saw the pain he’d caused, and suddenly his anger left as quickly as it had come. What the hell was wrong with him? This was supposed to be a fun, relaxed day.
“Jesus, Becca. I know,” he said roughly. “Family genetics.” Her bottom lip trembled, and Mac cleared his throat. “I’m sorry.”
It was barely noon and already the day was crap. Could it get any worse?
Becca glanced around, and Mac was suddenly aware that a lot of people were listening in on the Draper family drama. She gave him a hard look and then turned and left, weaving through the crowd until he couldn’t see her anymore.
He glanced over to Jake who was staring at him—his expression unreadable—and then when he turned toward his canoe, big blue eyes caught him. They caught him hard.
Lily held his gaze for several seconds and then motioned for Liam to follow her into the canoe.
Shit.
It was obvious to him that she’d heard everything, and he was guessing she wasn’t real happy with the exchange.
Guess his day was about to get worse.
***
The three of them managed to do okay considering neither Lily nor Liam were really talking to him. They navigated their way through the crowded waters until they broke through and had an expanse of blue to themselves. Mac knew that Cain and Michael were somewhere behind them, but up ahead he spied Jake and Raine—hard not to, Gibson freaking yapped at everything.
They fell into an easy rhythm, and as the afternoon wore on, he managed to coax some conversation out of Liam, but Lily was still cool. Polite. But cool.
When they reached the turnaround, he caught a smile she shot at Liam and his chest tightened when she glanced up at him. The sun painted a halo around her golden head, and with her cheeks pink from exertion, a healthy glow to her skin, and those eyes that could see into his soul, he knew the image was one he’d remember for a long, long time.
He offered a small smile and though she didn’t return it, she didn’t look away either. By the time they reached the shore where they’d started, the air was cooling off and it was nearly six in the evening.
Jake invited them over to the stone cottage at Wyndham Place, but Lily politely declined before Mac could answer, though after checking with Becca, Liam rode back to Jake’s with Cain, Maggie, and Michael.
Lily helped him secure the canoe on top of his truck and once they were in, seat belts in place, he revved the engine and gripped the steering wheel tightly. He wasn’t sure how to fix what he’d inadvertently broken, but he knew he needed to make things right.
He knew that maybe they needed to talk about some things.
“Lily,” he began carefully. “About before…”
“Can you just take me back to my place, please?” Her voice was soft—not a hint of pissed off, but shit. That’s it? She was gonna bail on him because he’d blurted out a bunch of shit that was basically the truth?
“Sure,” he answered sharply. “Sure thing, Boston.”
Her hands were gripped tightly in her lap, and she looked out her window as they pulled away from the beach. He probably shouldn’t have squealed the tires on the blacktop or cranked the tunes to ten, but he was pissed.
He felt the stirrings of something dark and heavy in him, and he thought that maybe this was good. They needed a few days to chill and figure this out, and he needed a date with his good buddy Jack.
Christ, he couldn’t remember the last time he’d cradled that particular bottle in his hands and the thought of getting shit-faced drunk was a good alternative to the thought of being alone at his place.
Hell, maybe he’d hit the Coach House.
Maybe he’d…
“Can you slow down please, Mackenzie?”
Again with the soft voice. He glanced at her, his heart taking off when he found her eyes on him. They were dark and intense, the blue much closer to denim than the clear, blue sky they normally resembled.
That thing inside him—whatever it was—pressed even tighter. Jesus, it didn’t feel as if he could breathe.
Automatically he relaxed his foot on the gas and slowed down as they came upon the bend just before her driveway. He maneuvered it expertly and pulled up beside her car, throwing the truck into park as he finally unclenched his hands from the wheel.
He glanced up at the cottage. She needed to water her hanging baskets or they were going to die.
For a moment, heavy silence filled the cab, and then she reached for the door handle.
“Are you going to shut this thing off?” she asked and then slid from the truck, not looking at him as she started for her porch.
Mac watched her climb the steps. He watched those long, tanned legs eat up the distance in no time. He watched her reach into her back pocket and retrieve a house key.
He watched her open the front door and pause a few seconds before disappearing inside. He had no idea what was going on or what the hell they were doing. He had no idea what Lily was thinking, and he sure as hell didn’t know where his head was at.
It had been a strange afternoon, but as he cut the engine and got out of his truck, he realized that it was time to figure this out—whatever this was.
He supposed it was time to be a grown-up.
Pretty sad, considering he was thirty-five.