Pregnant.
Alice is pregnant.
I got my girlfriend pregnant, and we haven’t even had a conversation yet about whether she is my girlfriend.
All through my teens, I expected this to happen to my brothers, probably Thatcher. Part of me waited for this type of phone call in college. And now I’m the idiot who fucked a girl with no protection. And what the hell was I thinking, shutting off her phone alarm and not telling her? I never let myself assume anything...so much for following my own advice.
I don’t even recognize who I’ve become.
Shit. The meeting.
“Joe, can you take me back to the office?”
He looks at me in the mirror. “Are you sure, Mr. Stag? You’re not looking so hot.”
“Joe. Office. Now.” I don’t have time for people’s assessments. I need to get hold of Juniper Jones.
“Right away, sir.” We head west, Joe avoiding the highways and finding a back road to avoid the rush hour traffic. I pull out my cell and breathe a sigh of relief that I’ve got Juniper’s number. Donna must have programmed it in for me.
I punch the screen to call her up and, almost like she was waiting for my call, she answers after one ring. “Tim.”
“Juniper. Give me some good news.”
“Tim, how is Alice?”
Shit. Of course she’s concerned about Alice. Everyone probably is. Alice knows everyone, knows their food preferences and knows the names of their damn grandmas. I breathe deeply. “Just a cut and a shiner. She’ll be back on Wednesday.”
“Everyone will be so relieved,” Juniper says. She covers the phone and shouts this news. “We all have been hanging out waiting to hear an update. I tried calling Mercy, but of course they wouldn’t release anything. I even told them I was her attorney, but I was very relieved they insisted on protecting Alice’s health information--”
“Juniper! The Cavs! What happened??”
“Oh! Oh, Tim. It was fine. You know they were so impressed with everything this morning. They took the contract with them to review, which is customary, but I’m certain they’ll come back with a yes and a retainer check tomorrow.”
I exhale the stress of the past few weeks, the part of my mind that focuses on work feeling much needed relief. Juniper continues. “Should we give some thought as to who will service this account? It will mean a lot of travel to Cleveland and our scan of the news lately seems to indicate we’ll have our work cut out for us with the hookers and blow, as Steve so delicately put it.”
It never occurred to me that anyone other than myself would handle this client. I delegate the less prestigious work, but this has been the prize I’ve been eyeing ever since I got my brother Ty back and signed. “Juniper, I really appreciate how you handled that meeting today. You were poised and professional and, really, quite excellent--”
She cuts me off. “Tim, if I can be blunt, I’m not interested in taking on this client. The travel would take away from my training time.”
Shit. She thought I was buttering her up to give her the Cavs. “Of course, Juniper. I plan to work this client personally. I was just making sure to praise your work in getting them here.”
“Oh.” There’s silence on the other end. “Well, thank you, Tim. While I have you, I really want to discuss the ideas I mentioned for the firm.”
“Juniper, I’ll be at the office in ten.”
“You’re coming back today?”
“Yes. What do you mean?”
“Well, I just thought...don’t you want to stay with Alice?”
“I’m not interested in pursuing this line of conversation right now, Juniper. I’ll see you in ten minutes.” I hang up on her. Things have never been this complicated for me. Just keep my nose down, work on the plan, account for all potential complications. Even with our dad drifting in and out of the house, I managed to keep our financials together, keep my brother Ty in private school for hockey. I scoff at the memory of forging my father’s signature each month to deposit our mother’s life insurance payments while he drank away his sorrows in one dive bar or another. At least they had their ducks in a line before she passed so we didn’t lose the house.
And here I am about to have a child, unable to even get my shit together at work let alone my personal life. This shouldn’t feel so complicated. Haven’t I already provided for my family? Haven’t I already made sure my brothers found success? Even if my middle brother defined that differently from the rest of us. I shake my head, twist my fisted hands in my eyes to clear the cobwebs. I need to sit at my desk where I can think.
Juniper meets me at the door and we walk and talk. I’m only half paying attention to her ideas. I’m sure they’re good ones, and I actually trust her to pursue them, so I don’t file that as urgent. Instead, my mind drifts to the Cavs contract and what I need to do to make sure Alice and the baby are safe, protected, and cared for. I settle into my chair and start to work out the logistics of my plan.