CHAPTER ELEVEN

CIVILITY AND GRACE

Big Government Socialism undermines civility, cancels anyone with different viewpoints, and denies understanding or grace to its opponents.

It may seem anachronistic in this age of atheism, satanism, Aztec gods of death, moral relativism, and sixty different pronouns to ensure sensitivity, but the fact is that the Founding Fathers believed deeply in honesty, morality, and faith. Their policies were designed to reinforce those virtues and they would have been appalled by Senator Daniel Patrick Moynihan’s essay on “Defining Deviancy Down,” which I discussed earlier. They would have seen tolerance for massive theft, widespread crime, and open dissolution as totally destructive to a healthy free society.

If this challenge is not met, nothing else will save America in the long run. The evidence that America was founded by people who believed deeply in the core principles of honesty, morality, and faith is simply overwhelming.

As a young man, George Washington copied a book on Civility and Decent Behavior in Company and Conversation. These 110 rules had been compiled by French Jesuits in 1595 and translated into English. While Washington apparently copied them originally as an exercise in penmanship, he took them to heart. By every report, he tried to live by them for his entire life. The dignity and sense of honor that Washington embodied became the bedrock on which America would be created between 1775 and 1796. We all stand on Washington’s shoulders, and he was truly the father of this country.

In his Farewell Address at the end of his second term as our first president, Washington said, “I hold the maxim no less applicable to public than to private affairs, that honesty is always the best policy.”

The enormity of Washington’s impact on his fellow countrymen was captured at his death by his close friend, Henry Lee, who had served under Washington during the Revolutionary War. Lee later served as a member of the Continental Congress and governor of Virginia. He was also the father of Robert E. Lee, who went on to lead the Confederate Army. Lee’s eulogy said, “first in war, first in peace, and first in the hearts of his countrymen.”1 And Lee was right: No one has ever unified and personified the American Republic to the degree Washington did. His leadership was based on honesty, morality, and faith.

Washington himself recognized his debt to these larger values. As he said in his first inaugural address: “No People can be bound to acknowledge and adore the invisible hand, which conducts the Affairs of men more than the People of the United States. Every step, by which they have advanced to the character of an independent nation, seems to have been distinguished by some token of providential agency.”2

Furthermore, Washington thought God was essential in a society to block evil. As he wrote in an earlier draft of the inaugural: “The blessed Religion revealed in the word of God will remain an eternal and awful monument to prove that the best Institutions may be abused by human depravity; and that they may even, in some instances be made subservient to the vilest of purposes.”3

Washington felt that he personally had been saved by God’s intervention. In 1778, in explaining the miraculous survival of the American army, Washington wrote: “The hand of Providence has been so conspicuous in all of this, that he must be worse than an infidel that lacks faith, and more than wicked, that has not gratitude enough to acknowledge his obligations.”

The other Founding Fathers shared Washington’s belief in the importance of honesty, faith, and morality.

In Federalist 55, Madison wrote that our Constitution requires “sufficient virtue among men for self-government,” otherwise, “nothing less than the chains of despotism can restrain them from destroying and devouring one another.”4 John Adams wrote: “Our Constitution was made only for a moral and religious People. It is wholly inadequate to the government of any other.”5

Thomas Jefferson shared the belief that God and America were inextricably intertwined. In reflecting on slavery in a letter he wrote to Washington: “God who gave us life gave us liberty. And can the liberties of a nation be thought secure when we have removed their only firm basis, a conviction in the minds of the people that these liberties are of the Gift of God? That they are not to be violated but with His wrath? Indeed, I tremble for my country when I reflect that God is just; that His justice cannot sleep forever. Commerce between master and slave is despotism.”6

President Abraham Lincoln continued this belief in an intervening Providence: “If it were not for my firm belief in an overruling Providence, it would be difficult for me, in the midst of such complications of affairs, to keep my reason on its seat. But I am confident that the Almighty has His plans, and will work them out; and, whether we see it or not, they will be the best for us.”

After the Civil War, Lincoln’s second inaugural is only 701 words long and yet references God six times, the Almighty and Lord once each. That is one divine reference for every 88 words. In trying to understand the agony of civil conflict, Lincoln had turned to the Bible and to prayer.

For two generations the elites have been working to drive God out of public life. From outlawing school prayer, to tearing down crosses and historic monuments, to defunding religious schools, to restricting voluntary religious activities, the American left has worked to erase religion in America. Contrary to the Washington and Lincoln experience, support for military chaplains has been steadily reduced. Restrictions on their religious activities have grown more cumbersome and celebrated in entertainment, news media, and academia.

Since human nature requires a passionate embrace of something larger than the mundane, Marxist secular revolutionary impulses tend to become religious. The 1949 collection of six essays called The God That Failed expose the inability of communism to replace God. Theodore White’s 1972 description of the liberal ideology being converted into a liberal theology was a landmark on the emergence of the woke religious impulse that now dominates the American left and Big Government Socialism. The disastrous nature of false, secular religions is captured in the second of the Ten Commandments when God says, “Thou shall have no other God before me.” Whether that false god is wealth, drugs, sexuality, power, or ideological zealousness, they are clearly false.

In the eighteenth century, the Wesley Brothers launched Methodism. Its life-changing impact reshaped life for the working class and directed toward salvation the energies that in France went into a revolution. Furthermore, Methodism inspired William Wilberforce to spend his lifetime abolishing slavery. The Wesleys helped inspire a religious revival in America called the Great Awakening, which created an emotional certainty and fervor that helped launch the American Revolution.

America today needs a spirit of revival and recommittal to overcome a decaying secular culture of despair that has produced drug addiction, mental illness, homelessness, and suicide on a scale no previous American generation could have imagined.

In practical terms, decisions need to be made from a basis of favoring honesty, morality, and faith. Where Moynihan described secular society as coping with decay by defining deviancy down, maybe it is time to rebalance. The real cultural clash may not be between right and left but rather between faith and honesty on one side and antireligious hostility and toleration for drugs, decay, and destruction on the other.

One effect of the collapse of honesty as a core principle has been a rise in criminal activity on a scale that would have been unthinkable for virtually all American history. We have witnessed eighty-five people as a gang running through a Nordstrom store stealing everything they can carry. We have watched an explosion of carjackings, many of them violent. We have seen murder rates skyrocket in our biggest cities. However, the greatest increase in criminal behavior has been nonviolent, white-collar crime. When we are told the total stolen from the various government stimulus programs may be as much as $400 billion, how many Americans have crossed the line to being thieves? Newspapers and TV channels report things they know are untrue. Senior FBI officials break the law. A clear commitment to reasserting honesty as a fundamental value is a key building block to getting back to a healthy America.

Furthermore, despite the disasters of drug addiction and overdoses, suicide, mental illness, and homelessness, it has been impossible to have a passionate debate about saving the lives of the afflicted because the secular world simply refuses to confront the price of driving God out of our lives. It is time to have that debate head-on. Millions of Americans will be better off if we can recapture the classic American belief that Providence, honesty, and morality matter.

THE AUTHORITY OF RELIGION IN OUR NATION

Religious freedom in America is part of a long tradition that has been upheld by our history and solidified by our Founding Fathers and national documents. Yet the ideas of Marx and Engels seem to be permeating our nation, disassembling the morality and civility instilled in our communities. This national amorality rejects our history of supporting religious freedom. It also fails to acknowledge the impact that religious charities, schools, and rehabilitation programs have on the nation.

There is a deep national morality in America that dates to the arrival of the first European settlers in the 1600s. The Puritans were devout Protestants who journeyed to the New World for economic prosperity and religious freedom. The Puritans modeled modesty, a strong work ethic, and a Christ-centered lifestyle. The early colonial people were not subject to the authority of government, but rather the authority of God.

John Winthrop was a Puritan leader of the Massachusetts Bay Colony for twelve years. Despite his power and leadership, he conveyed to his fellow Puritans that their primitive government was not the source of all authority. Winthrop taught that God was the leader of this new nation in his 1630 lecture titled “A Model of Christian Charity.” This speech went on to define how morality and the authority of religion would prevail in America.

Winthrop’s speech created a covenant among Puritans, not a law. This covenant acknowledged God’s authority and granted lesser authority to government. It gave the Puritans the opportunity for political establishment with a brotherly reciprocity and support for those in need. This new community became God’s new promised land—a place of future prosperity and success.

Winthrop proclaimed:

A city upon a hill? Indeed, this phrase became a symbol of American exceptionalism—a chosen nation selected by God to become the leader of the free world. This important phrase is taken from the gospel of Matthew’s “Ye are the light of the World. A city on a hill cannot be hidden.”8 This phrase has been repeated throughout our history by Republican and Democratic presidents alike. Presidents John F. Kennedy, Lyndon B. Johnson, Ronald Reagan, and George H. W. Bush are just a few who have called upon this divine message to inspire the nation. The authority of our nation is not grounded in government; it has always been grounded by the grace and freedoms endowed to each one of us by our Creator.

America’s national morality was made stronger by our Founders, who consciously chose to not implement a national religion. This separation was not to deny the legitimacy or importance of religion. It was to ensure religious freedom by acknowledging that no religion was more respected than another. It is often misunderstood that our Founders were faithless figures who denied the role of religion in the country. The Founders, however, were deeply moved by Enlightenment ideals and the principles of natural law. Natural rights are not dependent on the laws or customs of a government. They are universal, inherent, and unalienable rights that each person has. Our most treasured national documents—the Declaration of Independence, Constitution, and Bill of Rights—are each based on these fundamental natural rights.

The First Amendment reads:

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances.9

Madison championed the Bill of Rights through the first Congress in 1789.10 Madison’s fellow Virginians and constituents were predominantly Baptists who encouraged Madison to create a provision that would protect religion.11 America has remained committed to religious freedom by protecting people of all faiths. The First Amendment is not a statement against religion. It is a statement freeing people from oppression against religious persecution or the implementation of a national religion.

Just because the Constitution does not nationalize religion, does not mean that it was not a vital part of our Founding. In the most contentious days of the Constitutional Convention, Benjamin Franklin moved to convene the remaining sessions with a prayer. He said, “the longer I live, the more convincing proofs I see of this Truth—that God governs in the Affairs of Men.”12 He continued: “without his concurring aid, we shall succeed in this political building no better than the Builders of Babel.”13

Franklin’s message still holds true. Religion invokes selflessness and sacrifice in times of conflict and hatred. The contentious moments of the convention could have been the breaking point of our nation, yet in persisting through these challenges our Founders thought to invoke the guidance of God. The day of prayer and fasting turned out to be the turning point in the deliberations of the convention.

Limited government and a strong national morality have helped our system to endure time and challenge. Communism and socialism attempt to make the government the sole arbiter of what is right and what is wrong. Through an expansive network of rules, regulation, and oppression, socialist and communist nations purport to give rights to the people. The critical misunderstanding here is that rights are not given to us by the government; they are given to us by God.

The Constitution itself does not grant us freedom. It prevents the government from taking it away. Our inalienable, God-given rights cannot be infringed upon by the government. Take a look at the language in our Constitution. It is filled with phrases proclaiming that “Congress shall make no law…” What the Big Government Socialists (and the historic American left) misunderstand is that our founding documents are intended to protect us from the oppression of government, not to establish the authority or prestige of the government.

Communism and socialism seek to remove faith from everyday life. While America remains a nation with no endorsed religion—our country is certainly not irreligious. This is supported by our founding documents, which protect us from the rule of a tyrannical and oppressive regime. Our Creator has endowed us with life and liberty—our government must recognize the importance of faith and freedom in our nation if we are to remain true to the American tradition.

A NATIONAL MORALITY AND ITS REINFORCERS

As I wrote in the previous chapter, communist and socialist regimes actively try to weaken moral systems and venerate the government. This same behavior has been shown through hateful and arbitrary actions toward churches, religious schools, and even faith-based and nonprofit organizations. Like other Marxist movements, Big Government Socialism is threatened by the strength of faith and moral institutions. The principles of love, kindness, respect, and forgiveness are not useful in propagating the hateful and destructive means needed to implement a socialist government.

Right now, America is facing a moral crisis. The shift in the moral climate of the country is instigating dangerous changes that destroy the values upon which our country was founded. These attacks on religion and the family separate the glue that binds our nation together. America was built to last—but the burden to maintain the nation’s freedom falls on us to support and defend our natural rights.

As I mentioned, President Washington recognized the importance of upholding a strong, national morality. In his Farewell Address he said:

Instead of trying to destroy the impact of religious institutions, we should understand the good that they do in communities across the nation. Christianity, and all Abrahamic religions, teach that human beings are valuable because they are created in the image and likeness of God. Like God, the human person is endowed with reason. Our ability to engage in long-term and complex thought processes is what distinguishes us from other forms of life.

Recognizing the preciousness of our will and intellect elicits respect for all creation and human beings. Socialism and communism reject our inherent equality by sowing discord throughout the nation, facilitating a system in which those who work hard are punished, and those who don’t work hard enough are celebrated.

Our God-given ability to understand right and wrong guides us to make informed decisions and understand the repercussions. The irreligious left attacks the church to take authority away from God and give power to the government. In doing this they redefine right and wrong. Without a boundary between what is right and what is wrong, socialist groups eliminate national morality and civility, facilitating harmful divisions in the nation. When Americans fail to see one another as equally created, equally valuable human beings, the government becomes the source of moral authority.

The impact of religion has long been denied by members of the left. Yet in 2021, more than 75 percent of Americans said they identified with a religious faith.15 Of that group, 69 percent of Americans identified with Christianity and 7 percent identified as non-Christian, including Muslim or Jewish.16

The left has painted religion as archaic and obsolete. But there is a strong American majority that identifies as religious and recognizes its importance in our everyday lives. A Gallup poll found that 76 percent of Americans say religion is either “very” or “fairly” important in their lives.

A 2021 Pew study reported that the pandemic strengthened religious faith and tightened familial bonds in many families.17 According to Pew, many Americans reported a stronger personal faith in light of the pandemic and 35 percent of Americans said that the pandemic carries one or more lessons from God.18

In the face of illness, economic lockdowns, and national instability, more people have turned to their church communities for morally informed guidance during this challenging time. As federal, state, and local guidelines became convoluted and misinformed, many people became frustrated and confused by the direction of the government.

This ushered in the opportunity to reestablish the necessity and reliability of religion to inform and unite the nation. Longitudinal studies have shown increased religious observance after people experience crisis.19 Despite the restrictions on in-person religious services, Americans still found comfort in their church. Religious practice can be a tool used to address some of our gravest social and political challenges of today—if only we let it.

America is home to a broad range of congregations and religious communities. Aside from enhancing spirituality and community, churches also facilitate economic growth and individual rehabilitation. In 2016, it was estimated that religious organizations contributed $1.2 trillion each year to America’s economy and society.20 A National Congregations Study survey from 2018 found that there were an estimated 380,000 religious congregations across the United States.21 Churches across the nation employ hundreds of thousands of staff members who oversee facility and buildings operations, ministry, and charitable operations, making them a source of both moral direction and community enrichment.22

Religious congregations have helped establish and strengthen communities in ways that the United States government cannot. In the absence of a bloated bureaucratic system, religious congregations effectively aid individuals and families in varying forms of need. Religious congregations coordinate 7.5 million volunteers to run 1.5 million social programs each year.23 These programs provide individualized and effective treatment for people suffering from alcohol or drug abuse, mental illness, or HIV/AIDS, and veterans suffering from injury, PTSD, or homelessness.

The charitable work of religious institutions provides more than just short-term relief for problems facing communities. The services offered by religious groups provide opportunities for communities to repair themselves over time. Take, for example, Mount Lebanon Baptist Church in Maryland. Situated in a community with one of the highest HIV/AIDS diagnosis rates in the United States, Mount Lebanon Baptist Church offers free and confidential testing and support for those impacted.24

An African Methodist Episcopal church in Queens, New York, addresses unemployment in its community by helping the unemployed search for local jobs.25 The Greater Allen African Methodist Episcopal Church provides employment training opportunities and workshops for resume building and interview training.26 The Greater Allen AME Church is currently providing workshops on financial empowerment and relationship building via Zoom.27 This church is creating a lasting impact on the community by facilitating changes that will help people to overcome the adversities of their circumstances.

Church-based programs are helping families to rise above challenges. Right now, there are religious-run programs focusing on parenting assistance and other programs focusing on marriage improvement.28 While socialist and communist groups attempt to destroy the power of religious organizations, these groups are thriving within their communities and supporting individuals and families in need of guidance and counseling.

STRENGTHENING BONDS

Americans need moral systems such as church communities to reinforce the values of our nation. Respect, rights, freedom, and equality are all major teachings of the church. As Big Government Socialists attack religion, they also attack family. America is a nation built on brotherly love, yet more and more people see themselves as individuals, not as members of a family, community, culture, or country.

The growing singleness of American society is downplaying the fundamental importance of family in our country. Families are an essential building block for society, as they educate and instill civic engagement in the next generation of Americans. Democracy begins around the dinner table, which makes family a necessary part of the functionality of our country. Strong relationships and communities help individuals succeed and provide the tools for future generations to succeed. Yet recent trends in American relationships are preventing this pattern from carrying on.

A Pew Research study found that nearly 40 percent of adults were not married or living with a partner.29 The decline in marriage among adults is impacting the health of our nation altogether. Many studies have shown that children raised by married parents are more likely to do better in school and develop stronger skills that are useful later in life.30 Family helps strengthen and stabilize society, yet without any connection to family, tradition, or culture, socialist and communist ideologies thrive.

Pew reported that “unpartnered” people (meaning unmarried and not living with a partner) have lower earnings than partnered adults, are less likely to be employed, and have lower education attainment.31 These factors prevent Americans from realizing their dreams—mired in deprivation and despair, people will stop fighting and give up.

Marriage and family are foundational in a free society. The breakdown or delaying of marriage and family threatens freedom. The Institute for Faith, Work & Economics wrote: “Family is the primary institution of moral and character development, and society must protect the family as the smallest unit of political order.”32

This small unit of political order is the first step in protecting and preserving the nation. Americans must recognize the importance of family as a means of continuing to live free, full, and happy lives.

CIVILITY AND GRACE

The American system requires civility and grace from its people. Yet a culture of hubris and amorality has damaged our national character. The deep and splintered factions curated by the left have promoted a culture in which our differences are not used as tools for unity but as tools for division. Brotherhood begins with recognizing that every human being is created equally and in the image and likeness of God. Failing to recognize the humanity in each person allows for a culture of hatred and division to spread throughout our nation.

Civility encompasses so much of what America stands for. The Institute for Civility in Government writes:

Civility makes America an exceptional nation that embodies respect for others, proper public behavior, and self-regulation.34 Civility starts with our friends and family and extends to strangers on the street. President Washington’s 110 Rules of Civility and Decent Behavior in Company and Conversation asserts: “every action done in company ought to be with some sign of respect to those that are present.”35 Civility as public behavior is how we manage our attitudes toward those we do not know. Right now, we live in a society in which people judge others instantly (based on race, politics, profile pictures, etc.) and civility toward strangers has nearly disappeared. These instantaneous judgments make our nation feel more divided than it truly is.

Civility means regulating your self-interests for the sake of the community. We cannot forget that we have a civic obligation to care for our community and country at large. Civility can look different in each of our interactions. But what is most important is that we all embody care and respect for people. Civility is a virtue that each American is called to enact for social cooperation, even in the most polarized of times.36 Civility promotes compromise and respect in a society in which Big Government Socialists promote repression and cancel culture.37 It is time to see that there is more in our nation that can unite us than divide us.

Importantly, civility begins with the individual—not with the government. How can we expect our nation to look unified if our own communities are divided at home? America cannot achieve civility if we do not begin with mutual respect.

The culture that we live in today rejects a key principle of civility: disagreeing without disrespect. America’s Framers wrote our founding documents during one of the most contentious times in our history. While the Founders created a nation, they faced setbacks and concerns raised by opposition, yet they learned to disagree without crippling the progress of the nation. The bitter rivalry between John Adams and Thomas Jefferson could have resulted in chaos for our young nation; however, they learned to disagree without crippling the progress of the country. Throughout history there have been many bipartisan friendships that have strengthened our nation. Yet, so many politicians forget that their friends across the aisle are just that—friends. The culture on Capitol Hill under the reign of Nancy Pelosi is toxic. The environment that Pelosi created instigates gridlock and disfunction among members instead of seeking common-ground resolutions. Her secretive and self-serving deals do not help everyday Americans. They only seek to serve the agenda of Big Government Socialism.

When I was serving as Speaker, we routinely passed bills with bipartisan support. This showed that no matter which party we were tied to—we ultimately cared about the American people. Under Pelosi this would simply be impossible. The Contract with America showed the great progress that can be achieved with civility. In working with Democratic president Bill Clinton, we convinced many House Democrats to vote with us, and to vote for American solutions, not just partisan proposals. Civility means looking past that which divides you to achieve a greater good.

Bipartisan friendships show the importance of civility in our nation—even in contentious times. President Ronald Reagan and House Speaker Tip O’Neill consistently opposed one another’s political views. Yet the two forged a friendship based on respect and their commitment to serve the country.38 The late Supreme Court justices Antonin Scalia and Ruth Bader Ginsburg shared a close friendship while on the Court. Ginsburg’s and Scalia’s judicial philosophies could not have been more different—yet they disagreed without disrespect, and continued to interpret the law without impairing the judicial system. Day after day, the two had supremely different philosophies but found respect in one another’s brilliance.39

A 2021 American Enterprise Institute study found that 15 percent of adults ended friendships over politics.40 America was never meant to be a nation in which everyone agrees. Taking part in dialogue is imperative for a healthy democracy, but right now, Americans are choosing to cut off relations with political opposition, rather than working to communicate past those differences.

Right now, if you disagree with another person, all it takes is a few snarky posts to cancel them. This is not disagreement, this is suppression. We need to relearn what it means to be civil. We must resurrect common ground before we invoke hateful or untrue comments about others.

The problem is that Big Government Socialists refuse to acknowledge that there is indeed a common ground among Americans. An angry and loud minority group is misrepresenting the vast American majority that can come together to achieve progress. Americans need to be able to debate issues without suppressing the thoughts and freedoms of those who have the courage to speak out against the common thought.

The whole nation was never meant to be convinced to agree and believe the same thing, yet socialist thinkers aim to impose one viewpoint on all members of the society. America was founded on principles of civility and grace. These ideals are supposed to be upheld in individuals and localities. Communities can be the catalyst for change in a world in which cancel culture rules.

America is a nation that is reinforced by religion, family, society, and law. It is a country where we are all meant to share in the blessings of our God-given freedom from government oppression and thrive in the resilient system that was created by our Framers.

America supports civil debate, free speech, and grace. Yet these things seem like they have been eliminated as time presses on. The only solution to overcoming these differences is to recognize the humanity and grace in others. Combatting a culture of hubris and amorality means that we acknowledge that everyone is made in the image and likeness of God—our free speech and imperative as Americans depend on it.

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