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“Phil, you’re paranoid. RVers are the nicest people.”
“Uh huh.”
“That guy who came over here was cooking and wanted to borrow—”
“—I don’t care. He looked suspicious. He had a beard. He was checkin’ us out. Probably gonna rob us.”
“You’re nuts.”
Two hours later, a sheriff’s deputy was putting handcuffs on Phil.
“You had to be a big man and fire your gun, huh Phil?” said his wife. “You could have killed him.”
“He was coming at us with a knife. Honest, deputy.”
“Phil, you dope. He borrowed it to carve a roast. He was returning our knife.”