The apparition of these faces in the crowd : | |
Petals on a wet, black bough. |
Whirl up, sea – | |
whirl your pointed pines, | |
splash your great pines | |
on our rocks, | |
hurl your green over us, | |
cover us with your pools of fir. |
The Walk | |
You did not walk with me | |
Of late to the hill-top tree | |
By the gated ways, | |
As in earlier days; | |
You were weak and lame, | |
So you never came, | |
And I went alone, and I did not mind, | |
Not thinking of you as left behind. |
I walked up there to-day | |
Just in the former way: | |
Surveyed around | |
The familiar ground | |
By myself again: | |
What difference, then? | |
Only that underlying sense | |
Of the look of a room on returning thence. |
The Voice | |
Woman much missed, how you call to me, call to me, | |
Saying that now you are not as you were | |
When you had changed from the one who was all to me, | |
But as at first, when our day was fair. |
Can it be you that I hear? Let me view you, then, | |
Standing as when I drew near to the town | |
Where you would wait for me: yes, as I knew you then, | |
Even to the original air-blue gown! |
Or is it only the breeze, in its listlessness | |
Travelling across the wet mead to me here, | |
You being ever dissolved to wan wistlessness, | |
Heard no more again far or near? |
Thus I; faltering forward, | |
Leaves around me falling, | |
Wind oozing thin through the thorn from norward, | |
And the woman calling. |
After a Journey | |
Hereto I come to view a voiceless ghost; | |
Whither, O whither will its whim now draw me? | |
Up the cliff, down, till I’m lonely, lost, | |
And the unseen waters’ ejaculations awe me. | |
Where you will next be there’s no knowing, | |
Facing round about me everywhere, | |
With your nut-coloured hair, | |
And gray eyes, and rose-flush coming and going. |
Yes: I have re-entered your olden haunts at last; | |
Through the years, through the dead scenes I have tracked you; | |
What have you now found to say of our past – | |
Scanned across the dark space wherein I have lacked you? | |
Summer gave us sweets, but autumn wrought division? | |
Things were not lastly as firstly well | |
With us twain, you tell? | |
But all’s closed now, despite Time’s derision. |
I see what you are doing: you are leading me on | |
To the spots we knew when we haunted here together, | |
The waterfall, above which the mist-bow shone | |
At the then fair hour in the then fair weather, | |
And the cave just under, with a voice still so hollow | |
That it seems to call out to me from forty years ago, | |
When you were all aglow, | |
And not the thin ghost that I now frailly follow! |
Ignorant of what there is flitting here to see, | |
The waked birds preen and the seals flop lazily, | |
Soon you will have, Dear, to vanish from me, | |
For the stars close their shutters and the dawn whitens hazily. | |
Trust me, I mind not, though Life lours, | |
The bringing me here; nay, bring me here again! | |
I am just the same as when | |
Our days were a joy, and our paths through flowers. |
At Castle Boterel | |
As I drive to the junction of lane and highway, | |
And the drizzle bedrenches the waggonette, | |
I look behind at the fading byway, | |
And see on its slope, now glistening wet, | |
Distinctly yet |
Myself and a girlish form benighted | |
In dry March weather. We climb the road | |
Beside a chaise. We had just alighted | |
To ease the sturdy pony’s load | |
When he sighed and slowed. |
What we did as we climbed, and what we talked of | |
Matters not much, nor to what it led, – | |
Something that life will not be balked of | |
Without rude reason till hope is dead, | |
And feeling fled. |
It filled but a minute. But was there ever | |
A time of such quality, since or before, | |
In that hill’s story? To one mind never, | |
Though it has been climbed, foot-swift, foot-sore, | |
By thousands more. |
Primaeval rocks form the road’s steep border, | |
And much have they faced there, first and last, | |
Of the transitory in Earth’s long order; | |
But what they record in colour and cast | |
Is – that we two passed. |
And to me, though Time’s unflinching rigour, | |
In mindless rote, has ruled from sight | |
The substance now, one phantom figure | |
Remains on the slope, as when that night | |
Saw us alight. |
I look and see it there, shrinking, shrinking, | |
I look back at it amid the rain | |
For the very last time; for my sand is sinking, | |
And I shall traverse old love’s domain | |
Never again. | |
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Suddenly I saw the cold and rook-delighting heaven | |
That seemed as though ice burned and was but the more ice, | |
And thereupon imagination and heart were driven | |
So wild that every casual thought of that and this | |
Vanished, and left but memories, that should be out of season | |
With the hot blood of youth, of love crossed long ago; | |
And I took all the blame out of all sense and reason, | |
Until I cried and trembled and rocked to and fro, | |
Riddled with light. Ah! when the ghost begins to quicken, | |
Confusion of the death-bed over, is it sent | |
Out naked on the roads, as the books say, and stricken | |
By the injustice of the skies for punishment? |
Now as at all times I can see in the mind’s eye, | |
In their stiff, painted clothes, the pale unsatisfied ones | |
Appear and disappear in the blue depth of the sky | |
With all their ancient faces like rain-beaten stones, | |
And all their helms of silver hovering side by side, | |
And all their eyes still fixed, hoping to find once more, | |
Being by Calvary’s turbulence unsatisfied, | |
The uncontrollable mystery on the bestial floor. |
Sometimes in the over-heated house, but not for long, | |
Smirking and speaking rather loud, | |
I see myself among the crowd, | |
Where no one fits the singer to his song, | |
Or sifts the unpainted from the painted faces | |
Of the people who are always on my stair; | |
They were not with me when I walked in heavenly places; | |
But could I spare | |
In the blind Earth’s great silences and spaces, | |
The din, the scuffle, the long stare | |
If I went back and it was not there? | |
Back to the old known things that are the new, | |
The folded glory of the gorse, the sweet-briar air, | |
To the larks that cannot praise us, knowing nothing of what we do | |
And the divine, wise trees that do not care | |
Yet, to leave Fame, still with such eyes and that bright hair! | |
God! If I might! And before I go hence | |
Take in her stead | |
To our tossed bed, | |
One little dream, no matter how small, how wild. | |
Just now, I think I found it in a field, under a fence – | |
A frail, dead, new-born lamb, ghostly and pitiful and white, | |
A blot upon the night, | |
The moon’s dropped child! |
‘Est-ce que vous avez vu des autres – des | |
camarades – avec des singes ou des ours?’ | |
A Stray Gipsy – A.D. 1912 |
That was the top of the walk, when he said: | |
‘Have you seen any others, any of our lot, | |
With apes or bears?’ | |
– A brown upstanding fellow | |
Not like the half-castes, | |
up on the wet road near Clermont. | |
The wind came, and the rain, | |
And mist clotted about the trees in the valley, | |
And I’d the long ways behind me, | |
gray Arles and Biaucaire, | |
And he said, ‘Have you seen any of our lot?’ | |
I’d seen a lot of his lot… | |
ever since Rhodez, | |
Coming down from the fair | |
of St. John, | |
With caravans, but never an ape or a bear. |
from the Chinese of Rihaku |
While my hair was still cut straight across my forehead | |
I played about the front gate, pulling flowers. | |
You came by on bamboo stilts, playing horse, | |
You walked about my seat, playing with blue plums. | |
And we went on living in the village of Chokan: | |
Two small people, without dislike or suspicion. |
At fourteen I married My Lord you. | |
I never laughed, being bashful. | |
Lowering my head, I looked at the wall. | |
Called to, a thousand times, I never looked back. |
At fifteen I stopped scowling, | |
I desired my dust to be mingled with yours | |
Forever and forever and forever. | |
Why should I climb the look out? |
At sixteen you departed, | |
You went into far Ku-to-yen, by the river of swirling eddies, | |
And you have been gone five months. | |
The monkeys make sorrowful noise overhead. | |
You dragged your feet when you went out. | |
By the gate now, the moss is grown, the different mosses, | |
Too deep to clear them away! | |
The leaves fall early this autumn, in wind. | |
The paired butterflies are already yellow with August | |
Over the grass in the West garden; | |
They hurt me. I grow older. | |
If you are coming down through the narrows of the river Kiang, | |
Please let me know beforehand, | |
And I will come out to meet you | |
As far as Cho-fu-Sa. |
By the North Gate, the wind blows full of sand, | |
Lonely from the beginning of time until now! | |
Trees fall, the grass goes yellow with autumn. | |
I climb the towers and towers | |
to watch out the barbarous land: | |
Desolate castle, the sky, the wide desert. | |
There is no wall left to this village. | |
Bones white with a thousand frosts, | |
High heaps, covered with trees and grass; | |
Who brought this to pass? | |
Who has brought the flaming imperial anger? | |
Who has brought the army with drums and with kettle-drums? | |
Barbarous kings. | |
A gracious spring, turned to blood-ravenous autumn, | |
A turmoil of wars-men, spread over the middle kingdom, | |
Three hundred and sixty thousand, | |
And sorrow, sorrow like rain. | |
Sorrow to go, and sorrow, sorrow returning. | |
Desolate, desolate fields, | |
And no children of warfare upon them, | |
No longer the men for offence and defence. | |
Ah, how shall you know the dreary sorrow at the North Gate, | |
With Riboku’s name forgotten, | |
And we guardsmen fed to the tigers. | |
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Now, God be thanked Who has matched us with His hour, | |
And caught our youth, and wakened us from sleeping, | |
With hand made sure, clear eye, and sharpened power. | |
To turn, as swimmers into cleanness leaping, | |
Glad from a world grown old and cold and weary. | |
Leave the sick hearts that honour could not move, | |
And half-men, and their dirty songs and dreary, | |
And all the little emptiness of love! |
Oh! we, who have known shame, we have found release there, | |
Where there’s no ill, no grief, but sleep has mending, | |
Naught broken save this body, lost but breath: | |
Nothing to shake the laughing heart’s long peace there | |
But only agony, and that has ending: | |
And the worst friend and enemy is but Death. |
Fish (fly-replete, in depth of June, | |
Dawdling away their wat’ry noon) | |
Ponder deep wisdom, dark or clear, | |
Each secret fishy hope or fear. | |
Fish say, they have their Stream and Pond; | |
But is there anything Beyond? | |
This life cannot be All, they swear, | |
For how unpleasant, if it were! | |
One may not doubt that, somehow, Good | |
Shall come of Water and of Mud; | |
And, sure, the reverent eye must see | |
A Purpose in Liquidity. | |
We darkly know, by Faith we cry, | |
The future is not Wholly Dry. | |
Mud unto mud! – Death eddies near – | |
Not here the appointed End, not here! | |
But somewhere, beyond Space and Time, | |
Is wetter water, slimier slime! | |
And there (they trust) there swimmeth One | |
Who swam ere rivers were begun, | |
Immense, of fishy form and mind, | |
Squamous, omnipotent, and kind; | |
And under that Almighty Fin, | |
The littlest fish may enter in. | |
Oh! never fly conceals a hook, | |
Fish say, in the Eternal Brook, | |
But more than mundane weeds are there, | |
And mud, celestially fair; | |
Fat caterpillars drift around, | |
And Paradisal grubs are found; | |
Unfading moths, immortal flies, | |
And the worm that never dies. | |
And in that Heaven of all their wish, | |
There shall be no more land, say fish. |
Why does the thin grey strand | |
Floating up from the forgotten | |
Cigarette between my fingers, | |
Why does it trouble me? |
Ah, you will understand; | |
When I carried my mother downstairs, | |
A few times only, at the beginning | |
Of her soft-foot malady, |
I should find, for a reprimand | |
To my gaiety, a few long grey hairs | |
On the breast of my coat; and one by one | |
I watched them float up the dark chimney. |
When you see millions of the mouthless dead | |
Across your dreams in pale battalions go, | |
Say not soft things as other men have said, | |
That you’ll remember. For you need not so. | |
Give them not praise. For, deaf, how should they know | |
It is not curses heaped on each gashed head? | |
Nor tears. Their blind eyes see not your tears flow. | |
Nor honour. It is easy to be dead. | |
Say only this, ‘They are dead.’ Then add thereto, | |
‘Yet many a better one has died before.’ | |
Then, scanning all the o’ercrowded mass, should you | |
Perceive one face that you loved heretofore, | |
It is a spook. None wears the face you knew. | |
Great death has made all his for evermore. |
Out of the wood of thoughts that grows by night | |
To be cut down by the sharp axe of light, – | |
Out of the night, two cocks together crow, | |
Cleaving the darkness with a silver blow: | |
And bright before my eyes twin trumpeters stand, | |
Heralds of splendour, one at either hand, | |
Each facing each as in a coat of arms: | |
The milkers lace their boots up at the farms. |
All day and night, save winter, every weather, | |
Above the inn, the smithy, and the shop, | |
The aspens at the cross-roads talk together | |
Of rain, until their last leaves fall from the top. |
Out of the blacksmith’s cavern comes the ringing | |
Of hammer, shoe, and anvil; out of the inn | |
The clink, the hum, the roar, the random singing – | |
The sounds that for these fifty years have been. |
The whisper of the aspens is not drowned, | |
And over lightless pane and footless road, | |
Empty as sky, with every other sound | |
Not ceasing, calls their ghosts from their abode, |
A silent smithy, a silent inn, nor fails | |
In the bare moonlight or the thick-furred gloom, | |
In tempest or the night of nightingales, | |
To turn the cross-roads to a ghostly room. |
And it would be the same were no house near. | |
Over all sorts of weather, men, and times, | |
Aspens must shake their leaves and men may hear | |
But need not listen, more than to my rhymes. |
Whatever wind blows, while they and I have leaves | |
We cannot other than an aspen be | |
That ceaselessly, unreasonably grieves, | |
Or so men think who like a different tree. |
In our town, people live in rows. | |
The only irregular thing in a street is the steeple; | |
And where that points to, God only knows, | |
And not the poor disciplined people! |
And I have watched the women growing old, | |
Passionate about pins, and pence, and soap, | |
Till the heart within my wedded breast grew cold, | |
And I lost hope. |
But a young soldier came to our town, | |
He spoke his mind most candidly. | |
He asked me quickly to lie down, | |
And that was very good for me. |
For though I gave him no embrace – | |
Remembering my duty – | |
He altered the expression of my face, | |
And gave me back my beauty. |
Seventeen years ago you said | |
Something that sounded like Good-bye; | |
And everybody thinks that you are dead, | |
But I. |
So I, as I grow stiff and cold | |
To this and that say Good-bye too; | |
And everybody sees that I am old | |
But you. |
And one fine morning in a sunny lane | |
Some boy and girl will meet and kiss and swear | |
That nobody can love their way again | |
While over there | |
You will have smiled, I shall have tossed your hair. |
When we were children old Nurse used to say | |
The house was like an auction or a fair | |
Until the lot of us were safe in bed. | |
It has been quiet as the country-side | |
Since Ted and Janey and then Mother died | |
And Tom crossed Father and was sent away. | |
After the lawsuit he could not hold up his head, | |
Poor Father, and he does not care | |
For people here, or to go anywhere. |
To get away to Aunt’s for that week-end | |
Was hard enough; (since then, a year ago, | |
He scarcely lets me slip out of his sight –) | |
At first I did not like my cousin’s friend, | |
I did not think I should remember him: | |
His voice has gone, his face is growing dim | |
And if I like him now I do not know. | |
He frightened me before he smiled – | |
He did not ask me if he might – | |
He said that he would come one Sunday night, | |
He spoke to me as if I were a child. |
No year has been like this that has just gone by; | |
It may be that what Father says is true, | |
If things are so it does not matter why: | |
But everything has burned, and not quite through. | |
The colours of the world have turned | |
To flame, the blue, the gold has burned | |
In what used to be such a leaden sky. | |
When you are burned quite through you die. |
Red is the strangest pain to bear; | |
In Spring the leaves on the budding trees; | |
In Summer the roses are worse than these, | |
More terrible than they are sweet: | |
A rose can stab you across the street | |
Deeper than any knife: | |
And the crimson haunts you everywhere – | |
Thin shafts of sunlight, like the ghosts of reddened swords have struck our stair | |
As if, coming down, you had spilt your life. |
I think that my soul is red | |
Like the soul of a sword or a scarlet flower: | |
But when these are dead | |
They have had their hour. |
I shall have had mine, too, | |
For from head to feet, | |
I am burned and stabbed half through, | |
And the pain is deadly sweet. | |
The things that kill us seem | |
Blind to the death they give: | |
It is only in our dream | |
The things that kill us live. |
The room is shut where Mother died, | |
The other rooms are as they were, | |
The world goes on the same outside, | |
The sparrows fly across the Square, | |
The children play as we four did there, | |
The trees grow green and brown and bare, | |
The sun shines on the dead Church spire, | |
And nothing lives here but the fire, | |
While Father watches from his chair | |
Day follows day | |
The same, or now and then, a different grey, | |
Till, like his hair, | |
Which Mother said was wavy once and bright, | |
They will all turn white. |
To-night I heard a bell again – | |
Outside it was the same mist of fine rain, | |
The lamps just lighted down the long, dim street, | |
No one for me – | |
I think it is myself I go to meet: | |
I do not care; some day I shall not think; I shall not be! |
S’io credessi che mia risposta fosse | |
a persona che mai tornasse al mondo, | |
questa fiamma staria senza più scosse. | |
Ma per ciò che giammai di questo fondo | |
non tornò vivo alcun, si’i’odo il vero, | |
senza tema d’infamia ti rispondo. |
Let us go then, you and I, | |
When the evening is spread out against the sky | |
Like a patient etherised upon a table; | |
Let us go, through certain half-deserted streets, | |
The muttering retreats | |
Of restless nights in one-night cheap hotels | |
And sawdust restaurants with oyster-shells: | |
Streets that follow like a tedious argument | |
Of insidious intent | |
To lead you to an overwhelming question… | |
Oh, do not ask, ‘What is it?’ | |
Let us go and make our visit. |
In the room the women come and go | |
Talking of Michelangelo. |
The yellow fog that rubs its back upon the window-panes, | |
The yellow smoke that rubs its muzzle on the window-panes, | |
Licked its tongue into the corners of the evening, | |
Lingered upon the pools that stand in drains, | |
Let fall upon its back the soot that falls from chimneys, | |
Slipped by the terrace, made a sudden leap, | |
And seeing that it was a soft October night, | |
Curled once about the house, and fell asleep. |
And indeed there will be time | |
For the yellow smoke that slides along the street | |
Rubbing its back upon the window-panes; | |
There will be time, there will be time | |
To prepare a face to meet the faces that you meet; | |
There will be time to murder and create, | |
And time for all the works and days of hands | |
That lift and drop a question on your plate; | |
Time for you and time for me, | |
And time yet for a hundred indecisions, | |
And for a hundred visions and revisions, | |
Before the taking of a toast and tea. |
In the room the women come and go | |
Talking of Michelangelo. |
And indeed there will be time | |
To wonder, ‘Do I dare?’ and, ‘Do I dare?’ | |
Time to turn back and descend the stair, | |
With a bald spot in the middle of my hair – | |
(They will say: ‘How his hair is growing thin!’) | |
My morning coat, my collar mounting firmly to the chin, | |
My necktie rich and modest, but asserted by a simple pin – | |
(They will say: ‘But how his arms and legs are thin!’) | |
Do I dare | |
Disturb the universe? | |
In a minute there is time | |
For decisions and revisions which a minute will reverse. |
For I have known them all already, known them all – | |
Have known the evenings, mornings, afternoons, | |
I have measured out my life with coffee spoons; | |
I know the voices dying with a dying fall | |
Beneath the music from a farther room. | |
So how should I presume? |
And I have known the eyes already, known them all – | |
The eyes that fix you in a formulated phrase, | |
And when I am formulated, sprawling on a pin, | |
When I am pinned and wriggling on the wall, | |
Then how should I begin | |
To spit out all the butt-ends of my days and ways? | |
And how should I presume? |
And I have known the arms already, known them all – | |
Arms that are braceleted and white and bare | |
(But in the lamplight, downed with light brown hair!) | |
Is it perfume from a dress | |
That makes me so digress? | |
Arms that lie along a table, or wrap about a shawl. | |
And should I then presume? | |
And how should I begin? |
….. |
Shall I say, I have gone at dusk through narrow streets | |
And watched the smoke that rises from the pipes | |
Of lonely men in shirt-sleeves, leaning out of windows?… |
I should have been a pair of ragged claws | |
Scuttling across the floors of silent seas. |
….. |
And the afternoon, the evening, sleeps so peacefully! | |
Smoothed by long fingers, | |
Asleep… tired… or it malingers, | |
Stretched on the floor, here beside you and me. | |
Should I, after tea and cakes and ices, | |
Have the strength to force the moment to its crisis? | |
But though I have wept and fasted, wept and prayed, | |
Though I have seen my head (grown slightly bald) brought in upon a platter, | |
I am no prophet – and here’s no great matter; | |
I have seen the moment of my greatness flicker, | |
And I have seen the eternal Footman hold my coat, and snicker, | |
And in short, I was afraid. |
And would it have been worth it, after all, | |
After the cups, the marmalade, the tea, | |
Among the porcelain, among some talk of you and me, | |
Would it have been worth while, | |
To have bitten off the matter with a smile, | |
To have squeezed the universe into a ball | |
To roll it towards some overwhelming question, | |
To say: ‘I am Lazarus, come from the dead, | |
Come back to tell you all, I shall tell you all’ – | |
If one, settling a pillow by her head, | |
Should say: ‘That is not what I meant at all. | |
That is not it, at all.’ |
And would it have been worth it, after all, | |
Would it have been worth while, | |
After the sunsets and the dooryards and the sprinkled streets, | |
After the novels, after the teacups, after the skirts that trail along the floor – | |
And this, and so much more? – | |
It is impossible to say just what I mean! | |
But as if a magic lantern threw the nerves in patterns on a screen: | |
Would it have been worth while | |
If one, settling a pillow or throwing off a shawl, | |
And turning toward the window, should say: | |
‘That is not it at all, | |
That is not what I meant, at all.’ |
….. |
No! I am not Prince Hamlet, nor was meant to be; | |
Am an attendant lord, one that will do | |
To swell a progress, start a scene or two, | |
Advise the prince; no doubt, an easy tool, | |
Deferential, glad to be of use, | |
Politic, cautious, and meticulous; | |
Full of high sentence, but a bit obtuse; | |
At times, indeed, almost ridiculous – | |
Almost, at times, the Fool. |
I grow old… I grow old… | |
I shall wear the bottoms of my trousers rolled. |
Shall I part my hair behind? Do I dare to eat a peach? | |
I shall wear white flannel trousers, and walk upon the beach. | |
I have heard the mermaids singing, each to each. |
I do not think that they will sing to me. |
I have seen them riding seaward on the waves | |
Combing the white hair of the waves blown back | |
When the wind blows the water white and black. |
We have lingered in the chambers of the sea | |
By sea-girls wreathed with seaweed red and brown | |
Till human voices wake us, and we drown. |
Miss Helen Slingsby was my maiden aunt, | |
And lived in a small house near a fashionable square | |
Cared for by servants to the number of four. | |
Now when she died there was silence in heaven | |
And silence at her end of the street. | |
The shutters were drawn and the undertaker wiped his feet – | |
He was aware that this sort of thing had occurred before. | |
The dogs were handsomely provided for, | |
But shortly afterwards the parrot died too. | |
The Dresden clock continued ticking on the mantelpiece, | |
And the footman sat upon the dining-table | |
Holding the second housemaid on his knees – | |
Who had always been so careful while her mistress lived. |
The darkness crumbles away. | |
It is the same old druid Time as ever, | |
Only a live thing leaps my hand, | |
A queer sardonic rat, | |
As I pull the parapet’s poppy | |
To stick behind my ear. | |
Droll rat, they would shoot you if they knew | |
Your cosmopolitan sympathies. | |
Now you have touched this English hand | |
You will do the same to a German | |
Soon, no doubt, if it be your pleasure | |
To cross the sleeping green between. | |
It seems you inwardly grin as you pass | |
Strong eyes, fine limbs, haughty athletes, | |
Less chanced than you for life, | |
Bonds to the whims of murder, | |
Sprawled in the bowels of the earth, | |
The torn fields of France. | |
What do you see in our eyes | |
At the shrieking iron and flame | |
Hurled through still heavens? | |
What quaver – what heart aghast? | |
Poppies whose roots are in man’s veins | |
Drop, and are ever dropping; | |
But mine in my ear is safe – | |
Just a little white with the dust. |
(1922)
What in our lives is burnt | |
In the fire of this? | |
The heart’s dear granary? | |
The much we shall miss? |
Three lives hath one life – | |
Iron, honey, gold. | |
The gold, the honey gone – | |
Left is the hard and cold. |
Iron are our lives | |
Molten right through our youth. | |
A burnt space through ripe fields, | |
A fair mouth’s broken tooth. |
(1937)
A worm fed on the heart of Corinth, | |
Babylon and Rome: | |
Not Paris raped tall Helen, | |
But this incestuous worm, | |
Who lured her vivid beauty | |
To his amorphous sleep. | |
England! famous as Helen | |
Is thy betrothal sung | |
To him the shadowless, | |
More amorous than Solomon. |
(1937)
They sing their dearest songs – | |
He, she, all of them – yea, | |
Treble and tenor and bass, | |
And one to play; | |
With the candles mooning each face.… | |
Ah, no; the years O! | |
How the sick leaves reel down in throngs! |
They clear the creeping moss – | |
Elders and juniors – aye, | |
Making the pathways neat | |
And the garden gay; | |
And they build a shady seat.… | |
Ah, no; the years, the years; | |
See, the white storm-birds wing across. |
They are blithely breakfasting all – | |
Men and maidens – yea, | |
Under the summer tree, | |
With a glimpse of the bay, | |
While pet fowl come to the knee…. | |
Ah, no; the years O! | |
And the rotten rose is ript from the wall. |
They change to a high new house, | |
He, she, all of them – aye, | |
Clocks and carpets and chairs | |
On the lawn all day, | |
And brightest things that are theirs.… | |
Ah, no; the years, the years; | |
Down their carved names the rain-drop ploughs. |
Old Man, or Lad’s-love, – in the name there’s nothing | |
To one that knows not Lad’s-love, or Old Man, | |
The hoar-green feathery herb, almost a tree, | |
Growing with rosemary and lavender. | |
Even to one that knows it well, the names | |
Half decorate, half perplex, the thing it is: | |
At least, what that is clings not to the names | |
In spite of time. And yet I like the names. |
The herb itself I like not, but for certain | |
I love it, as some day the child will love it | |
Who plucks a feather from the door-side bush | |
Whenever she goes in or out of the house. | |
Often she waits there, snipping the tips and shrivelling | |
The shreds at last on to the path, perhaps | |
Thinking, perhaps of nothing, till she sniffs | |
Her fingers and runs off. The bush is still | |
But half as tall as she, though it is as old; | |
So well she clips it. Not a word she says; | |
And I can only wonder how much hereafter | |
She will remember, with that bitter scent, | |
Of garden rows, and ancient damson-trees | |
Topping a hedge, a bent path to a door, | |
A low thick bush beside the door, and me | |
Forbidding her to pick. |
As for myself, | |
Where first I met the bitter scent is lost. | |
I, too, often shrivel the grey shreds, | |
Sniff them and think and sniff again and try | |
Once more to think what it is I am remembering, | |
Always in vain. I cannot like the scent, | |
Yet I would rather give up others more sweet, | |
With no meaning, than this bitter one. |
I have mislaid the key. I sniff the spray | |
And think of nothing; I see and I hear nothing; | |
Yet seem, too, to be listening, lying in wait | |
For what I should, yet never can, remember: | |
No garden appears, no path, no hoar-green bush | |
Of Lad’s-love, or Old Man, no child beside, | |
Neither father nor mother, nor any playmate; | |
Only an avenue, dark, nameless, without end. |
Tall nettles cover up, as they have done | |
These many springs, the rusty harrow, the plough | |
Long worn out, and the roller made of stone: | |
Only the elm butt tops the nettles now. |
This corner of the farmyard I like most: | |
As well as any bloom upon a flower | |
I like the dust on the nettles, never lost | |
Except to prove the sweetness of a shower. |
Gone, gone again, | |
May, June, July, | |
And August gone, | |
Again gone by, |
Not memorable | |
Save that I saw them go, | |
As past the empty quays | |
The rivers flow. |
And now again, | |
In the harvest rain, | |
The Blenheim oranges | |
Fall grubby from the trees, |
As when I was young – | |
And when the lost one was here – | |
And when the war began | |
To turn young men to dung. |
Look at the old house, | |
Outmoded, dignified, | |
Dark and untenanted, | |
With grass growing instead |
Of the footsteps of life, | |
The friendliness, the strife; | |
In its beds have lain | |
Youth, love, age and pain: |
I am something like that; | |
Only I am not dead, | |
Still breathing and interested | |
In the house that is not dark: – |
I am something like that: | |
Not one pane to reflect the sun, | |
For the schoolboys to throw at – | |
They have broken every one. |
Rain, midnight rain, nothing but the wild rain | |
On this bleak hut, and solitude, and me | |
Remembering again that I shall die | |
And neither hear the rain nor give it thanks | |
For washing me cleaner than I have been | |
Since I was born into this solitude. | |
Blessed are the dead that the rain rains upon: | |
But here I pray that none whom once I loved | |
Is dying tonight or lying still awake | |
Solitary, listening to the rain, | |
Either in pain or thus in sympathy | |
Helpless among the living and the dead, | |
Like a cold water among broken reeds, | |
Myriads of broken reeds all still and stiff, | |
Like me who have no love which this wild rain | |
Has not dissolved except the love of death, | |
If love it be towards what is perfect and | |
Cannot, the tempest tells me, disappoint. |