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The next day
Jonathan had bumped into Liam in the entrance of the hospital talking to Tom. The three of them had discussed telling Rachel about Bridget, but all three decided against it. He’d found it difficult to even be civil with Liam Dune.
After Liam left – without seeing Rachel – Tom told Jonathan about Liam. Liam had finally come clean to Tom about the affair.
Jonathan wasn’t that surprised when the mysterious woman turned out to be Charlotte Gayle, but it would be hard for Rachel when she found out.
Why the fuck had Liam come?
Jonathan made his way up to the fourth floor and Rachel’s private room. He stopped to ask a nurse for room 410, made his way further down the corridor, tapped on her door and entered.
She was sitting in the chair next to the bed, a handful of coloured ribbons clasped in her hand. The type of ribbons she’d taken to wearing after she left the force, but ones she’d stopped wearing after Joe’s death.
‘Hi you,’ she said, so quietly he could hardly hear.
He nodded towards the ribbons. ‘Where did you get those?’
He smiled as widely as he could.
‘Rosie, Tom’s wife, brought them for me. I asked her to. I want to find to Rachel again. Joe’s Rachel.’
‘She’s not far away,’ he said.
Rachel put the ribbons on the bedside cabinet then touched her face; gesticulated towards her body.
‘Do you hate the way I look?’
‘No, I don’t.’
‘I do.’
‘I know it’s early days but Marek says everything’s reversible.’
‘He’ll be kept out of this?’
‘He’s flying over to speak with Tom Gillespie.’
‘This isn’t good for Tom.’
‘Tom’s OK. I think he covered his bases. You don’t get to his position without covering your arse. And he has.’
‘Has Tom contacted Liam?’ Her face fell into a deeper seriousness.
‘Did you want him to?’
‘Hemmings told me things...’
‘And you need to talk them through, but not now.’
‘He told me why Joe was on the field.’
‘Do you want to tell me?’
She nodded. He thought she would cry but her eyes, now their old clear grey – she’d taken out the contacts – remained dry.
‘I knew there was something with Liam.’
‘Go on.’
‘Joe walked in on Liam ... and the woman. Joe did go to the den.’ She fingered a ribbon. ‘It was Charlotte, Jonathan, who was having an affair with Liam.’
‘I know.’ Jonathan moved closer. She shouldn’t have to deal with this. He paused. ‘Liam’s told Tom.’ He didn’t mention that Liam had come to see her and been sent away. ‘Tom’s told me not to talk with you too much.’
‘You mean not tell me everything? I think I know everything there is to know, and it’s not good stuff.’
‘Tell me what else Hemmings told you,’ he said, deciding to ignore Tom’s advice. And he listened as Rachel recounted everything that had happened at the park, and before.
When she finished, she sat higher in bed. ‘Do you believe I saw Joe, that I’ve been seeing him from the beginning? Am I going mad?’
‘Some people would say it’s your imagination.’ He stopped for a second, thinking about his next words. ‘Your grief, and a heightened state of consciousness because of that grief. You want Joe to have peace, Rachel.’
Jonathan took a deep breath. ‘Perhaps it was your subconscious that saw and smelt Joe.’
She nodded, happy with his answer.
‘And Margaret?’ The fine contours of her new face collapsed. ‘She was at Michael’s squat. She saw Joe. She left him there, Jonathan. She said nothing.’
‘I’m not sure about Margaret yet. Tom has all the information. He’s investigating. But from what I’ve found out, it seems possible that she abused Michael during his childhood.’ He glanced at her. ‘I’m so sorry.’
‘I knew about it. Deep down, I knew. This is all my fault...’
A nurse knocked on the door; she smiled at them both.
‘Scran’s up, I’m going to have to ask you to leave,’ she looked towards Jonathan. Her Liverpudlian accent was strong; he only just made out her meaning.
‘I have to go, but I’ll be back soon and we can talk,’ he said. ‘And try and eat some scran.’ He smiled.
Jonathan had thought she would ask more about Sam and Margaret. It appeared she was handling it all well. Too well. He knew she was still in shock; and sitting in the safety of the hospital she’d bleached her mind of what had happened. He knew how this worked. He’d done the same thing when his parents had been killed.
He thought of the extremes Rachel had gone to, to avenge the appalling murder of her son, and what could have been the outcome of her quest.
Kissing her on the cheek he left, closing the door gently behind him. He walked into the clear air of the late afternoon.
He needed to speak to Sam, who was being held in police custody.