Bonus Material from Isaac’s Decision

 

Description: Isaac Larson's been warned by his father to stay away from "the Craftsman girl" for years. But that's easier said than done when Emily Craftsman is the only one who sparks his passion. Will he defy his father to be with the woman he wants, or will he choose the woman his father wants him to marry?

 

Interview with Emily Craftsman (Heroine in Isaac’s Decision)

(Blog post made on 07/31/2011)

 

Ruth Ann Nordin: I’m almost finished with chapter 1 of Isaac’s Decision, and now I have a good idea of where the story is going. So up tonight is Emily Craftsman who is seventeen by the time Isaac’s Decision starts. Emily, I’ll start with a question that is bound to be on people’s minds when they start reading this book. Why Isaac Larson? You have young men falling at your feet to court you. Why not pursue someone who isn’t purposely ignoring you?

 

 

Emily Craftsman: That’s just it. Why is he ignoring me? It wasn’t always this way. When we were younger, he did pay attention to me. In fact, he was the only boy who treated me as an equal. The other boys couldn’t accept the fact that I was as smart-well, smarter than them because I was a girl.

 

Ruth: Really? You’d never know Isaac even talked to you back then considering how he goes out of his way to avoid you today.

 

Emily: I don’t understand it either. The last time I remember him choosing to speak to me was when we were twelve and his father came to pick him up early from the schoolhouse. From then on, it’s as if Isaac didn’t even know me. I mean, he knew me, but he wasn’t my friend anymore.

 

Ruth: Given all of that, why are you in love with him?

 

Emily: Because I sense he never wanted to stop being my friend. It’s hard to explain. There are times when he looks at me, and I know he wants to talk to me but can’t.

 

Ruth: Are you sure you’re not making excuses for him? One day he was talking to you and the next, he’s not? Maybe he’s a jerk who’s better off making someone else miserable. I, for one, would never pursue a guy like that.

 

Emily: Well, I’m not you, so I’m not going to do things the way you would. Besides, I know the type of books you write, and you do beta heroes. Beta heroes aren’t jerks.

 

Ruth: Hey, I’ve done an alpha or two. Jake Mitchell from An Inconvenient Marriage and Nathan Rudolph from What Nathan Wants are what I consider to be alphas.

 

Emily: But at their core, they were nice.

 

Ruth: I’m glad to hear you think so. But back to Isaac. I don’t see how you’re going to get him to open up to you. He’s pretty determined to avoid you.

 

Emily: I realize I have a challenge ahead of me, but I don’t back down from challenges. It might take some creative thinking, but I’ll come up with a way to find out what’s going on with him.

 

Ruth: Maybe you should ask your father. He might have an idea of what’s going on and why.

 

Emily: My father doesn’t like to talk about the Larsons. Well, that’s not entirely true. He’s talked with that family on occasion, but I can’t remember him talking to Isaac’s father. Now that I think about it, it is strange. He’ll talk to Isaac’s mother but not his father. Why is that?

 

Ruth: Don’t you remember what happened in His Redeeming Bride when your real mother came back for you and you overheard her talking to your father?

 

Emily: All I remember from that time was that my real mother never loved me. She admitted it out in the open. I hated her after that. I try not to think about it.

 

Ruth: It’s okay to be upset about it.

 

Emily: And what good will it do to dwell on the past? I can’t change what happened. I’m just glad my stepmother loves me.

 

Ruth: Have you thought about what would happen if you saw your real mother again?

 

Emily: No. I never want to see her again. The time she came to get me so she could get money is enough. *narrows her eyes* Wait a minute. You aren’t planning on bringing her into this book, are you?

 

Ruth: I’m not sure. It depends on how the plot unfolds. I’m not sure how you’ll react to things at that point. Maybe you’ll run away at some point.

 

Emily: I’ve never run away from anything in my life. The book is about me ending up with Isaac. It’s a romance. I’m the heroine. He’s the hero. There’s a happy ending.

 

Ruth: While that’s true, everyone has their breaking point. Isaac’s going to find his, and you might find yours as well. The question is, what will you do when that moment comes?

 

Emily: It’s hard to say unless I know what moment you’re talking about. If you can elaborate on it, I might be able to answer your question right now so you know how the book will go.

 

Ruth: Nice try, Emily, but the best part of writing a book is not knowing how the characters will react until the scene comes up. I have no idea how you’ll react.

 

Emily: But you know how Isaac will react to his crisis moment?

 

Ruth: Yep. He’s not as complicated as you are. In every book I write, there’s a character who is harder for me to figure out. Congratulations, Emily. You’re that character in this book!

 

Emily: Did you want me to do a cheer or something because I don’t find this particularly amusing. It sounds like you’re saying I’m difficult to work with.

 

Ruth: Yes, you are going to be difficult to work with. That’s why I can’t get a true feel for you.

 

Emily: And is there a difficult character in Shotgun Groom?

 

Ruth: Believe it or not, it’s Joel Larson in that one.

 

Emily: Why?

 

Ruth: Because I don’t know if he’ll protest the marriage for as long as I’m hoping.

 

Emily: If he doesn’t protest the marriage for long, then you’ll be stuck with a novella instead of a full-length book.

 

Ruth: No. Secondary characters do a great job of providing conflict. Granted, the romance writing “manual” insists the conflict must be between the hero and heroine, but I’ve found it’s more interesting when the two have to work through the tough situation instead of fighting or misunderstanding each other.

 

Emily: There you go. I won’t run off. Isaac and I will work together in whatever you have planned.

 

Ruth: All I can say is that a story doesn’t exist without conflict. This interview has run longer than I thought it would. If you feel inclined, we’ll meet again.

 

Emily: Great. Maybe you’ll tell me more about the stuff Isaac’s going to hide from me at that time.

 

Ruth: Probably not. That would spoil the book for others. It’s been a pleasure, Emily. I look forward to writing your book and finding out what you’ll choose to do.

 

Photo Credit: Shutterstock.com Image ID:41519404 Copyright: Karen Grigoryan

 

***

 

Second Interview with Emily Craftsman (Heroine in Isaac’s Decision)

(Blog post made 08/10/2011)

 

Ruth Ann Nordin: So there I was writing Isaac’s Decision (I’m up to 4000 words now) when Emily told me she wanted to be interviewed. Without much ado, let me bring her in.

 

 

Ruth: LOL (lots of laughs) Okay. Hold on. Emily, what are you doing?

 

Emily Craftsman: I wanted you to be the first one to see my disguise.

 

Ruth: What for? A comedy routine?

 

Emily: No. This book isn’t a comedy. It’s actually quite serious. If I read the outline correctly, you have me crying at one point.

 

Ruth: So what’s with your hand?

 

Emily: What? Haven’t you all heard of a fist pump in the year 2011? It’s a celebratory gesture. I looked it up online before I contacted you for an interview.

 

Ruth: ROFL (roll on the floor laughing) It just looks weird.

 

Emily: Okay. Fine. Let me change my location. Maybe that will make you stop laughing.

 

 

Ruth: What the heck are you doing in this one?

 

Emily: Bringing myself some flowers.

 

Ruth: I have to ask it. Why are you bringing yourself some flowers dressed as a man?

 

Emily: It’s all part of my plan to get Isaac to talk to me. He won’t talk to me as Emily, so I thought he’d talk to me as Elmer.

 

Ruth: Elmer?

 

Emily: Yeah. I wanted to stick close to Emily to keep things simple. They both start with E and have an ‘l’ and ‘m’ in the name.

 

Ruth: Okay. And the flowers are dark and creepy because?

 

Emily: Oh, I figure men have lousy taste. It wouldn’t be believable if I picked something pretty.

 

Ruth: Hey, wait a minute. Are you in a cemetery?

 

Emily: There was a reason why I did a close up picture in this disguise. This makes me seem rather morbid. Plus, I knew you’d flip if you saw the pavement. I read your interview with April Edwards from Shotgun Groom where you pointed out the car, blah, blah, blah.

 

Ruth: To be fair, she was trying to run away from the book. I’m not a stickler for the historical stuff as long as my characters aren’t trying to abandon me while I’m writing a book.

 

Emily: I’m not leaving this story. I’ve been waiting for this story to be written ever since you wrote His Redeeming Bride. That was in 2009. Boy, were you long overdue to write this one!

 

Ruth: I had other stories to write first.

 

Emily: But none of those are as compelling as my romance. I know. I’ve read the emails you get. It seems I’ve captured the hearts of many.

 

Ruth: Nothing like an ego trip to get you through the day, right Emily?

 

Emily: Ego trip?

 

Ruth: Didn’t look that up online before you came? Yay! One point goes to the author. It’s the Larsons they like, not necessarily you. Anyway, let’s get a decent picture of you dressed as a man so people don’t think I’m writing a horror novel because you with those dark flowers and creepy stare have “horror novel” written all over it.

 

Emily: Fine. I’ll try not to look so grim when I talk to Isaac.

 

Ruth: That’d be a good thing. But enough rambling about pictures. Do you plan to dress up like a man and pretend to be interested in you as Emily. What’s the point?

 

Emily: I have two very good reasons for doing this. Well, three. 1. My dearest friend in the whole world came up with this idea, and she’s never proven me wrong when she comes up with something. 2. Isaac will see that another man is interested in me, and I hope this gets him jealous. If he’s jealous, he might actually start paying attention to me. And 3. I might get him to talk to me as a man. Maybe he’ll tell Elmer why he keeps avoiding Emily…me… You know, the me that is Emily. Not Elmer. *scratches head* You get what I’m saying, right?

 

Ruth: I think we all got the idea, but I don’t know how much of this will play out like you expect. I mean, I can come up with an idea, but sometimes things change while writing a scene.

 

Emily: But I’m still dressing up as a man. That part stays, right?

 

Ruth: Yes, but you actually expect him to believe you’re a man?

 

Emily: I hope he does. I’ve been watching men carefully. The way they walk, the way they talk, what they talk about. They can be pretty disgusting creatures, you know. When one man didn’t think someone was looking, he scratched a certain part of himself. *shudders* That is something I never do.

 

Ruth: Whatever you do, don’t watch baseball. They do that all the time, and right in front of the camera where millions are watching.

 

Emily: Oh gross!

 

Ruth: Be glad you live in a time when men pretended they didn’t have an itch down there. Anyway, what chapter do you think will be the one where you meet Isaac as Elmer?

 

Emily: I hope in chapter 3, but knowing you, you’ll wait until chapter 4.

 

Ruth: Chapter 3 is where you study men, and I need to do a scene from Isaac’s point of view.

 

Emily: Really? What will he be doing?

 

Ruth: I don’t know yet.

 

Emily: How can you not know? You’re coming to the end of chapter 2.

 

Ruth: Most of the time, I only know what will happen in the next chapter.

 

Emily: Good heavens! That’s just crazy to write on a whim like that. *pauses* Can I make a suggestion?

 

Ruth: What?

 

Emily: Have him elope with me!

 

Ruth: I can’t do that so soon in the book.

 

Emily: Why not?

 

Ruth: Because then it won’t be a full-length novel. You’ll take out at least 1/4 of it.

 

Emily: *sigh* Can you at least interview him so he tells everyone why he’s avoiding me?

 

Ruth: You mean so you can read the interview and find out before he tells Elmer in the story?

 

Emily: Yes! No! I wouldn’t read his interview. It’s a secret between you and him and the rest of the world.

 

Ruth: Sure, Emily. *rolls eyes* No dice. I’m not doing it yet.

 

Emily: You’re hard to deal with.

 

Ruth: Don’t worry. You’ll like it when you find out the truth.

 

Emily: Really?

 

Ruth: I’ve said all I’m going to say. Thanks for coming, Emily! *runs off before she can track me down*

 

Photo Credits:

Emily Fist Pump: ID 17632756 © Ryan Jorgensen | Dreamstime.com

Emily Close Up with Flowers: ID 16410620 © Ryan Jorgensen | Dreamstime.com

 

***

 

Interview with Isaac Larson (Hero from Isaac’s Decision)

(Blog post made on 08/29/2011)

 

Quick intro

 

Just to quickly set the stage for the interview, Eva Connealy is 16 and the teacher. Isaac and Emily are both 17. Because Eva is teaching people older than her, she attends night classes to stay ahead of them in their studies. I decided Eva would be younger than Isaac after I learned that Laura Ingalls Wilder taught when she was almost 16 and went to school at night because she had some students older than her. (Who said that the vacation I took one summer didn’t pay off, even though I couldn’t get any pictures of the Ingalls’ house in DeSmit, South Dakota?)

 

Eva Connealy is the youngest daughter of Joseph and Margaret Connealy (remember A Husband for Margaret?). When Joseph and Margaret got married, he already had four boys: Doug, Bob, Charles, and Ben. After Joseph and Margaret married, they had two girls: Charlotte and Eva.

 

Now, you’re wondering why I spent so much time explaining the Connealy family, right? Well, Dave Larson (Isaac’s dad, in case someone reading this doesn’t know) is trying to fix Isaac up with Eva. What fun, huh? In fact, that is why I brought Isaac in for an interview.

 

Enough of the introduction. Let’s get Isaac in here.

 

Interview

 

Ruth Ann Nordin: You know, Isaac, I didn’t realize you had such light blond hair. In fact, I’m sure I wrote in the book that you had dark blond hair.

 

 

Isaac Larson: Don’t blame me. You selected this picture from www.dreamstime.com. (And no, I am not getting paid to advertise for them this way.)

 

Ruth: You were supposed to play along and say you colored your hair a lighter shade of blond for this interview.

 

Isaac: Why would I do that?

 

Ruth: Well, because otherwise, we have to admit there’s a discrepancy between how you look in the book and how you look in the picture.

 

Isaac: I don’t think anyone’s going to care. It’s just a book, and this is a post that will get buried into nonexistence since you tend to post a lot. By the time the book comes out, who’ll be the wiser?

 

Ruth: I plan to do more interviews with you, and you’ll have the same shade of blond. We might even discuss the release of the book or your happy ending.

 

Isaac: That’s not my problem. I just show up when you finally decide to write my story. I notice you spend more time on Joel Larson’s book. You’re already at 25,000 words on Shotgun Groom. You just hit 14,000 on mine.

 

Ruth: Okay. First of all, his story comes before yours in the chronological order of the Nebraska series.

 

Isaac: Then explain why you’re going back in time to write Sally Larson’s book after you’re done with Shotgun Groom. Chronologically, she’s the first one who gets married in the Nebraska series.

 

Ruth: *sigh* Once, just once, I’d like to have a main character who will actually work with me instead of arguing.

 

Isaac: I can’t help it if you’re inconsistent.

 

Ruth: I plan to publish Shotgun Groom before Isaac’s Decision.

 

Isaac: Really? And when will that be?

 

Ruth: I’m keeping my fingers crossed for November for Shotgun Groom and January for your book, but no promises. If you characters give me writer’s block because you don’t like the direction of the story, then I’ll have to push back the deadline. But this doesn’t have anything to do with this interview. So let’s get to it. Isaac, I notice that you are avoiding Emily Craftsman. Do you mind telling us why?

 

Isaac: You’re the author. Can’t you just tell everyone?

 

Ruth: Isaac, you’re one snarky comment away from getting married to Eva Connealy, so watch it. I can change the plot of this book. That would make your father happy.

 

Isaac: *grimaces* I’ll be good. Okay. Fine. You want the truth? I’ll say it. My father doesn’t want me to talk to Emily.

 

Ruth: But you want to talk to her?

 

Isaac: It doesn’t matter what I want. I’ve been warned over and over to stay away from “the Craftsman girl”. If I hear Pa say that one more time, I might scream.

 

Ruth: Now we’re getting somewhere! Why would you scream?

 

Isaac: Because it makes no sense. What could Emily possibly have done that was so bad that my father wouldn’t want me to talk to her?

 

Ruth: What would you say if you could talk to her?

 

Isaac: *shrugs* I don’t know. It’s been so long since I’ve talked to her that I’m not sure where to begin.

 

Ruth: So why not move on and put her behind you?

 

Isaac: You obviously haven’t seen her.

 

Ruth: Sure I have. She was interviewed not too long ago. In face, there were two interviews.

 

Isaac: Can I read them?

 

Ruth: Nope. You can’t find out what’s going on until later in the book.

 

Isaac: Figures. I heard you like to keep your characters in the dark as you destroy their lives.

 

Ruth: What? Who said that?

 

Isaac: Joel Larson. He’s pretty upset about what’s happening in Shotgun Groom, and tomorrow is the dreaded wedding day, from what I hear.

 

Ruth: It is. I’m looking forward to it.

 

Isaac: Because you love to make people suffer?

 

Ruth: No. I’m looking forward to it because the romance part will finally start to unfold. But this isn’t about me and what I’m doing with Shotgun Groom. It’s about you and your upcoming “date” with Eva Connealy.

 

Isaac: *shivers* It is not a date. My pa invited her over for supper.

 

Ruth: You don’t sound excited about it.

 

Isaac: Why would I be? Not only is she my teacher, but I have no interest in her.

 

Ruth: Why not? She’s not that bad.

 

Isaac: I don’t know. There’s just no chemistry going on between me and her. What’s worse is that I think she has a crush on me.

 

Ruth: She does.

 

Isaac: Good grief. Why? I don’t do anything to encourage her.

 

Ruth: I guess there’s something about you that renders women helpless.

 

Isaac: Very funny. I’m not that good looking.

 

Ruth: You’re right. You’re not. I don’t understand why she likes you either.

 

Isaac: Now who’s being snarky?

 

Ruth: Payback, buddy. Payback. If you can’t handle the snarky retorts, then don’t dish them out. But seriously, you need to stand up to your father if you expect him to stop playing matchmaker. Otherwise, you’ll end up with a woman you don’t want.

 

Isaac: So I need to tell my father that I’d rather court Emily than Eva?

 

Ruth: You could try that, but how do you know you even want to court Emily when you haven’t talked to her since you were fourteen?

 

Isaac: It’s not that I haven’t said anything to Emily. It’s just that I keep my distance. I have to. My little brother Jacob is the biggest blabbermouth on the planet.

 

Ruth: You have to give Jacob a break. He’s only eight. Granted, you said a couple words to Emily in chapter five. But it’s hardly enough to substantiate a reason for you to want her.

 

Isaac: It’s hard to explain. Okay. There is one thing that’s obvious. She’s beautiful. It’s impossible to walk into a room and not notice her. But there’s more to her than how she looks. I sense that, deep down, there’s a person worth loving. I don’t think many people allow that part of her to come to the surface. When they see her, they see how she looks. With Emily, there’s more to her than meets the eye.

 

Ruth: I think we’ll end this interview on that high note. Thanks for coming, Isaac. I’ll talk to you again later.

 

Photo credit:

Isaac: File ID: 10797649, © Elena Rostunova | Dreamstime.com, date of purchase 08/28/2011, no longer available

 

***

 

Story Excerpt from Isaac’s Decision and an Interview with Isaac (Hero in Isaac’s Decision)

(Excerpt posted on 09/28/2011; Interview posted on 09/29/2011)

 

Here’s the Excerpt:

 

Toward the end of supper, Dave resumed his questions to Eva, this time focusing on her family.

“Your parents are friends of my brother Tom’s family,” he began. “If I remember right, your mother has been friends with Jessica since they were children.”

“You are correct,” Eva said. “In fact, Daisy and I are good friends.”

At the mention of Tom and Jessica’s youngest daughter’s name, Dave’s eyes lit up. “You are? I wonder why Tom never mentioned it.”

“He probably didn’t think about it,” Mary filled in. “How often do you tell people Isaac, Clayton, and Wiley are friends?”

“I see your point,” Dave conceded. “But all the same, it’s nice to hear that you’re friends with my niece.”

Eva shrugged and pushed her glasses up her nose. “The bond that links us together is our mutual appreciation of literature and art. We adore the library.”

As she rambled on, Isaac ate the rest of his pot roast. He couldn’t imagine why going to a library was, as Eva put it, stimulating. It sounded like a boring way to spend a pleasant afternoon, but he supposed that was why she agreed to be a teacher. She enjoyed that kind of thing.

He glanced at his father and noticed how attentive Dave was to every word Eva spoke. Looking at his mother, he saw that she focused on the twins and helping them when they needed it. Currently, she was buttering one of their rolls. Across from him, Rachel chewed on her potato and Adam rolled a carrot around on his plate, appearing as bored as Isaac felt. Isaac couldn’t imagine doing this for the rest of his life. Not that he’d have dinner at his parents’ every night, but he’d be stuck with Eva and would have to participate in the conversation.

From beside him, Jacob lightly kicked him and snickered. Knowing he was going to regret it, Isaac’s gaze shifted to his brother, who pursed his lips as if he was going to kiss someone. With a roll of his eyes, Isaac went back to ignoring him. He was not going to kiss Eva. Ever. There was no way he could do it. He wasn’t attracted to her at all. If only she was Emily…

Isaac swallowed the last bite of his food and drank the rest of the milk in his glass. He watched as his father nodded and smiled as Eva went on and on about the artwork she and Daisy had seen. Since when did artwork interest his pa? Ever since Eva showed an interest in it. What was more frustrating than anything else was knowing that if it had been Emily sitting next to him, his father wouldn’t have showed the slightest interest in what she said. And all because of something that happened before he was born?

His mother stood up and went to the kitchen to get the pies she made for the occasion. One thing Isaac looked forward to was her apple pie. If nothing else, it made the rest of the meal bearable. Afterwards, it was time for Isaac to take Eva home, and he was relieved when Mary insisted that Rachel and Adam go along.

“Isaac can take her by himself,” Dave argued as Mary collected the dishes from the table. “Rachel should stay and help you while Jacob and Adam help me in the barn.”

 

Here’s the Interview:

 

Ruth Ann Nordin: Yesterday, I posted the excerpt from the story, Isaac’s Decision, where Dave had invited Eva Connealy over for supper in hopes of starting something between her and Isaac. While I think it’s cute Dave is playing matchmaker, Isaac isn’t so happy about it.

 

Isaac Larson: Why would I be happy about it? I’ve told him I don’t want to marry Miss Connealy.

 

Ruth: You mean, Eva Connealy.

 

Isaac: No, I mean Miss Connealy. She’s my teacher, not a love interest. That part of this story bites.

 

Ruth: I didn’t realize that “bites” was a historically accurate term for disgust in the late 1800s.

 

Isaac: Do I look like I care about historical accuracy when my dad is ruining my life?

 

Ruth: Fair enough. So why don’t you like Miss Connealy?

 

Isaac: She’s boring. All she wants to talk about is art and books, and not even interesting books either. She rambles on about some nonsense that I can’t fully make heads or tails of. I think it has something to do with what’s proper, but I end up zoning out so I miss a lot of what she says. What’s worse is that my little brother kept bugging me all through the supper. Did you have to make him so annoying?

 

Ruth: I kind of like Jacob. He reminds me of Joel when Joel’s giving Tom a hard time.

 

Isaac: *rolls eyes* Lucky for me the author of my book happens to have a sick and twisted sense of humor.

 

Ruth: It’s a gift.

 

Isaac: If you say so.

 

Ruth: It’s not like you’re going to end up with Miss Connealy. This is just a bump in the road on your way to a happy ending with Emily.

 

Isaac: I don’t see how that’s possible since I’m still not talking to her. Well, not enough to make a difference. Handing her a dime novel and saying I wouldn’t tell Miss Connealy what she was reading doesn’t make any difference.

 

Ruth: You might have said more if Jacob wasn’t right there in the schoolhouse.

 

Isaac: That’s because he tells our parents everything, and even though my mother can handle it, my father gets uptight whenever it comes to Emily.

 

Ruth: At least your other brothers and sisters don’t give you grief. Anyway, I thought I’d bring your father in to talk to him while we’re doing this interview.

 

Isaac: Do I have to stick around for this? I just know he’s going to go on and on about how great Miss Connealy is.

 

Ruth: Oh, come on. He won’t be that bad.

 

Isaac: He actually dressed up for the supper. Dressed up! He’s never put on his church shirt and jacket for supper before, and he had my mother put out her best dishes. It was ridiculous. The only thing worse than all of that was how he pretended to be interested in books and art. He rarely reads, and he doesn’t care about art. He only did all of that to make Miss Connealy think I was interested in her. It was horrible. I’m leaving. If I stick around for this, I think I’ll throw up.

 

Ruth: And they say women are dramatic. Okay. Thanks for stopping by.

 

*Isaac leaves and in comes Dave*

 

Ruth: *laughs* You really did dress up for the supper with Eva.

 

Dave: Of course, I did. I think she’ll be my future daughter-in-law. I’m really excited about where things are heading in this story. Personally, I think she will make Isaac very happy. She’s got a good head on her shoulders and comes from a good family.

 

Ruth: Dave, you do understand that it’s not up to you to pick your son’s wife, right?

 

Dave: I’m not picking his wife out. I’m just showing him what his options are.

 

Ruth: Yes, but you’re pushing hard on this particular option. I mean, you’re putting on the pressure.

 

Dave: I’m not pressuring him. I’m just encouraging him.

 

Ruth: There’s a fine line between encouragement and pressure.

 

Dave: I don’t see what the problem is. She’ll make a good wife. She reminds me of Mary, and a man can’t do any better than Mary. I don’t expect Isaac to ask to court her until she’s finished with her teaching contract. I understand the rules and won’t overstep them.

 

Ruth: And if Isaac doesn’t want to court her when her contract is up?

 

Dave: We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it, but I don’t think there’s anything to worry about. Once Isaac stops thinking of her as his teacher, it’ll be fine. You’ll see.

 

Ruth: Or maybe you will. Okay. Well, thanks for coming in for the interview and feel free to take that suit jacket off. It just doesn’t fit who you are.

 

Dave: Alright.

 

Ruth: Boy, are both of these guys in for a surprise. *chuckles* Sometimes it’s fun to throw the characters for a loop with an unexpected twist.

 

***

 

Showdown Between Emily Craftsman and Eva Connealy and an Interview

(Isaac’s Decision Excerpt posted on 10/07/2011; Interview posted on 10/11/2011)

 

The reason why I wanted to give a part of this scene in Isaac’s Decision is because it shows the contrast between Emily and Eva. From Emily’s perspective, Eva’s boring. From Eva’s perspective, Emily doesn’t understand the necessity of being a proper young lady. I love both Emily and Eva, but these two will never be friends. Their personalities conflict way too much. I wrote Eva’s romance, and it’s called Boaz’s Wager in the Montana Collection.

 

But without further ado, here’s the excerpt, followed by the interview. Eva is the teacher, and she has asked Emily to write a book report. Eva’s not happy with Emily’s book choice, so she wants her to read a different book.

 

Excerpt

 

“I’m not arguing about the moral lesson you gained from this book. I’m saying the serial killing is too violent, especially for a young woman.” After a very tense moment, Eva handed the pages to Emily. “I refuse to turn this into the school board as an example of what you’re learning under my guidance.”

Crossing her arms, Emily said, “And I refuse to do a report on Emma.”

Eva set the papers on the desk and made eye contact with her. “If you intend to keep going to school, you’ll do what I say.”

It took Emily a moment to realize what Eva was telling her. She narrowed her eyes at the teacher. “Very well, Eva. Have it your way.”

Eva stood up, her shoulders back and a look of indignation on her face. “When we are in the schoolhouse, you will address me as Miss Connealy. It is a matter of respect. I would never refer to an instructor by the first name.”

“Well, that’s the difference between us, Eva. I don’t get uptight when it comes to opening my mind to new ideas, like what a woman should and should not be allowed to read. You will keep your mind closed to new possibilities, and in doing so, you will live a pathetic and lonely life as an old maid since no man wants to be with a woman who’s continually uptight.”

Eva gasped. “I’d watch your words, Emily! It is not befitting for a proper lady to talk in such a way.”

“I’ve got better things to do with my time than to spend it on etiquette, Eva. I want to enjoy my life, not waste it away with my nose stuck in a boring old book while I criticize those who don’t share my reading taste.”

Eva’s lips formed a thin line, but Emily decided she’d had enough. She wouldn’t waste one more minute in this place or with Miss-Holier-Than-Thou Eva Connealy. Spinning on her heel, she ignored the stares of the students who had stopped their work to listen to her argue with Eva. She made her way over to Isaac who had the good sense to keep his gaze on the paper on his desk. The fact that he’d stopped writing was a dead giveaway that he’d been listening along with the others.

“Take me home,” Emily demanded, her anger prompting her to hold back her tears.

Isaac’s head shot up, his eyes wide and his mouth open in shock.

The silence hanging in the air was so profound that Emily swore time stood still. She maintained eye contact while she waited for him to respond. When his gaze flickered to Eva, she snapped, “Either you take me home, or I’ll walk.”

“Oh, Emily, be serious,” Eva called out. “You can’t walk all the way home in the cold weather.”

Still looking at Isaac, she said, “Don’t tell me what I can and can’t do. I’m not a child!”

 

Interview

 

Ruth Ann Nordin: Eva, I see you’re not too happy about the argument you and Emily had.

 

Eva Connealy: How can I be? I hate confrontation, and I knew with a person like Emily, it wasn’t going to be pleasant.

 

Ruth: A person like Emily? Could you elaborate on that?

 

Eva: Emily’s never been the type to adhere to what’s expected of her in society. I mean, she dresses up as a man in order to go hunting with Isaac, Wiley, and Clayton. What kind of respectable woman does that? Never mind that she’s lying about being a man so they won’t know her true identity. The real scandal is that she’s alone in a wooded area with three men! I’d die of shame if that were me.

 

Ruth: Granted, in the 1890s, this behavior wouldn’t be appropriate.

 

Eva: It shouldn’t be appropriate in any time period!

 

Ruth: Well, be that as it may, this issue isn’t why you and Emily got into a fight. The actual fight had to do with an assignment you gave Emily. She was supposed to write down her thoughts about a book she read.

 

Eva: Yes. The school board wanted me to demonstrate that Emily is learning while under my guidance, and they gave me a list of things they’re looking for in her report. While I agree she understood the moral implication of the book she chose, I can’t bring them a report on a book that contained so much violence. They’d assume I’m not doing my part to encourage Emily to become a proper young woman. She completely missed the point in why I told her I couldn’t accept the report.

 

Emily Craftsman: No, I didn’t miss the point. I just don’t think a woman has to read boring books to protect their “delicate sensibilities”. I can handle mature subject matters in my books.

 

Eva: Which is why you indulge yourself in dime novels. *rolls eyes*

 

Emily: Dime novels are fun to read. Not all reading has to be for learning. It wouldn’t hurt you to have fun once in awhile.

 

Eva: I have plenty of fun.

 

Emily: Looking at paintings and trying to decipher what the artists were thinking is not fun.

 

Eva: It most certainly is. Art is highly subjective. Two people can look at the same thing and have two different interpretations of it.

 

Emily: Which is boring. I seriously don’t think Ruth can write a romance featuring you. Why, I can see how the book would go. Eva was looking at paintings. The hero, whoever that poor guy turns out to be, happened to say he saw the artist’s anguish in the painting, and the two bored each other to sleep. The end.

 

Eva: Why can’t you just be glad you got Isaac?

 

Emily: I am glad I got him. Even you can’t bring my mood down. We’ll be eloping soon.

 

Eva: Then I should send him my condolences. I can only imagine all the improper behaviors you’ll be teaching your children.

 

Emily: What? Like that they should think for themselves instead of letting their teacher tell them what they believe?

 

Eva: You see how difficult she is to work with, Ruth? I don’t know why you paired Isaac up with her.

 

Ruth: Don’t worry, Eva. I will write your story, and the man you’ll end up with will be a much better match for you than Isaac is.

 

Emily: Are you saying that Isaac isn’t the best hero you created?

 

Ruth: I’m saying that he isn’t the right hero for Eva. He’s the perfect one for you. It’s all about matching up the right personalities together.

 

Emily: Okay. I guess that sounds logical.

 

Eva: See what I mean about Emily being difficult to work with? I hope she doesn’t show up when you do my book. Having gone through this one with her is enough grief to last me a lifetime.

 

Emily: Eva, I’d tell you where to stuff it, but for the sake of the people reading this, I won’t.

 

Eva: You know some colorful cuss words, do you?

 

Emily: I spent a lot of time around the farm hands while growing up.

 

Eva: The more I learn about you, the less I want to know. Is this interview over yet?

 

Emily: Yes. Is it, Ruth? You have some extra minutes tonight and you finished all your word counts. That means you can work on the scene where Isaac convinces me to elope with him.

 

Eva: *rolls eyes* Convince you? I’d be shocked if you don’t drag him to the preacher.

 

Emily: You know, Eva, I can act like a woman, contrary to what you think. Just because I go against the norm in some things, it doesn’t mean I sacrificed my feminine side. It just means I’m an independent thinker.

 

Eva: You’re rebellious.

 

Emily: That’s what the British thought about the colonists before they lost the American Revolutionary War. See? I did learn something in school.

 

Eva: Too bad you didn’t do a report on George Washington or Thomas Jefferson.

 

Emily: Few things are more boring than biographies. You would’ve loved to have killed me through boredom, wouldn’t you?

 

Eva: I need another Aspirin.

 

Ruth: Well, I think we’ll end the interview on that note.

 

Eva: Thank goodness. Please never bring me back to talk to Emily.

 

Emily: I agree. She’s hogging up my space with her whining. Next time feature me and Isaac!

 

***

 

Deleted Scene from Isaac’s Decision

(Blog post made on 10/13/2011)

 

This scene happens right after Neil finds out Emily is interested in Isaac. This scene never made it into the final draft of this book, but for fun, I thought I’d add it in this one. Things ended up a lot different than I planned. Dave wasn’t as hostile in the final version as he is in this scene.

 

The next day, Neil led his horse up to Dave Larson’s property and noted the way his gut twisted. He hadn’t set foot on this land ever since Dave made it clear that if he did, he ran the risk of being shot at. Given the circumstances, Neil couldn’t blame Dave for making the threat, but that was almost eighteen years ago. Certainly, Dave would understand that given the passage of time, Neil’s request was a reasonable one. And Dave wouldn’t want to stand in the way of his son’s happiness any more than Neil wanted to stand in the way of Emily’s. Dave was a reasonable man. Surely, they could bury the hatchet and do what was best for their children.

All of this ran through his mind as he approached the blue house with white trim. Neil pulled back on the reins of his horse and slowly exhaled. The good news was he was right in front of Dave’s house and no gunfire had erupted yet.

Sliding off his horse, he walked the steed over to the post and tied the reins to it. With a quick pat on the animal’s neck, he turned his attention to the front door. This was it. He hadn’t said more than a couple words to Dave since that day at the train station when Dave let him have it for abducting Mary. Not that Neil could blame him. Dave had every right to hate him for what he did. He just hoped since he acted rashly in the past, he didn’t make it so that Emily couldn’t be with Isaac.

Straightening his back, Neil headed up the porch steps, careful to stomp the snow off his boots so he wouldn’t track it on his way to the door. Before he could talk himself out of it, he knocked on the door and forced himself to stand still so he wouldn’t bolt for his horse and get out of there.

The door opened, and Mary’s concerned expression came into view. “Is something wrong?” she asked him. “Is Sarah alright?”

“No, nothing’s wrong. Sarah’s fine,” he replied and then cleared his throat. “Actually, I came to speak to your husband. Is Dave here?”

“Yes. Come on in.” She held the storm door open for him and motioned to the parlor. “Dave’s upstairs. Why don’t you have a seat, and I’ll get him.”

“Thank you.”

He stepped into the parlor and smiled at the twin three-year-old girls who stopped playing with their dolls to look at him. If he hadn’t been so nervous, he would have asked them what they named their dolls. As it was, he was too tense to do anything but remain standing in the middle of the room. He doubted Dave would let him sit on his furniture, let alone be happy to find him standing in his house. Shifting from one foot to the other, he went over the words he planned to say when he saw Dave. The girls continued to stare at him, but he hardly noticed.

From upstairs, he could hear Mary’s soothing voice as she told Dave to give Neil a chance before throwing him out. Neil grimaced. This was turning into a disaster before it even started. He took a deep breath and reminded himself he was doing this for Emily. The footsteps grew louder as Dave and Mary made their way down the stairs. Neil squared his shoulders back.

Dave entered the parlor first, a scowl on his face. “Get the children out of here,” he told Mary, not taking his eyes off of Neil.

“Let’s get something to eat,” Mary said, holding her hands out to the girls, who stood up. “Take your dolls.”

They got their dolls and glanced from their father to Neil. Dave motioned for them to go with their mother, and they hurried to obey.

When they were out of the room, Dave turned his attention to Neil. “You’re not welcome here.”

Neil took another deep breath and chose his words carefully. “I know I’m not, and I don’t blame you for being upset.”

“You’re right, I am upset. I thought I made it clear to you what would happen if you got near anyone in my family.”

“I’m not here for anyone in your family. I just wanted to talk to you.”

Dave crossed his arms and glared at him, and Neil felt as if they were right back at the train station all over again. “Mary might think I should listen to you, but I don’t have that kind of patience for people like you.”

Despite the surge of irritation Neil felt at the insult, he forced it aside. He was here because of Emily, not to save his pride. “Look, Dave, this isn’t about me. It’s about my daughter. I came here to work out some kind of truce so that our children can be happy.”

Eyebrows furrowed, Dave asked, “What do my children have to do with this?”

“It’s Isaac. Emily and Isaac have fallen in love and—”

“Oh no, he hasn’t. Not my son!”

Neil blinked and stared at Dave for a moment. He knew Dave wouldn’t be happy about the situation, but he didn’t expect him to be so vehemently opposed to it. Clearing his throat, Neil said, “They are. I talked to Emily last night, and she said that she and Isaac want to be together.”

“Over my dead body.”

At that, Neil laughed, not sure why he was laughing because it wasn’t funny, but his nerves were just about shot from the whole night he’d spent worrying about how today would go—and now things were going as bad as he feared. “Dave, you can’t punish our children for what I did. I apologized at the train station, and I’m apologizing again. I’m sorry. I was wrong to try to take Mary from you. But that has nothing to do with Isaac and Emily. I’m not looking for forgiveness. You have a right to distrust me. We can work something out where we don’t have to be in the same place at once. Isaac and Emily can take turns seeing us on the holidays. We can work something out so they come here for one holiday and then come out to my house the next. Just because they’ll get married, it doesn’t mean I have to be in your life.”

“Married?” Dave shouted, his face bright red.

“I assume that’s where things are headed. Emily hasn’t been interested in any of the young men who’ve been wishing to court her, but she’s taken a liking to Isaac so I think—”

“It doesn’t matter what you think! They aren’t getting married. I don’t know what gives Emily the idea that my son would marry someone like her, but he’s not.”

In an instant, Neil’s mood switched from nervous rambling to being offended. “What is that supposed to mean?”

“You know what it means, Craftsman.”

“No, I don’t.” He brought himself to his full height, which was just a bit taller than Dave, and narrowed his eyes at him. “It sounds like you insulted my daughter, but I know I couldn’t have heard right because she’s innocent in all of this.”

“You know what they say: the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.”

Before Neil had time to think, he drew back his fist and punched Dave in the jaw. Dave staggered back, but returned Neil’s punch with one of his own. Neil toppled onto the coffee table, which broke in half under his weight. Neil quickly got up and rammed into Dave until they both fell to the floor.

“You can talk about me anyway you want to, Larson, but you have no right to talk about my little girl that way!”

Dave shoved Neil off of him and got to his feet. “You keep that little girl of yours away from my son.”

Mary ran into the room and gasped. “What are you two doing?”

“Get out of my house!” Dave ordered Neil, pointing to the front door.

“You can’t stop two people from being together,” Neil said as he stood up, rubbing his sore cheek.

“What two people?” Mary asked.

“No two people,” Dave quickly replied. “No one’s getting married.”

Her jaw dropped. “Married?”

Dave groaned. “It’s nothing. Neil just came over to create trouble because that’s what he’s good at. Will you please go back to Rose and Harriett while I throw him out of here?”

“There’s no need,” Neil muttered as he stormed by them. “You have a rude awakening coming to you, Larson, and the sooner you deal with it, the better off your son’s going to be.”

Dave’s lips formed a thin line as he headed in Neil’s direction, so Neil strode to the front door and flung it open. Unbelievable. Nothing changed. In eighteen years, nothing changed! Neil shook his head and hurried down the porch steps.

As he untied the reins to the horse, he glanced back at the house. By the worried look on Mary’s face, he was sure she was asking her husband what was going on. Neil hopped on his horse in time to see Isaac coming out of the barn. Isaac’s gaze went from Neil to the house and then back to Neil.

“Good luck,” Neil told Isaac with another glance at the house. “You’re going to need it.”

Then Neil hurried off the property.

 

***

 

Interview With Dave Larson and Neil Craftsman

(the fathers of the groom and bride in Isaac’s Decision)

(Blog post made on 10/16/2011)

 

Ruth Ann Nordin: Tonight, I managed to get Dave Larson and Neil Craftsman in for an interview. Sadly, Dave is in a little bit of denial tonight…

 

Dave Larson: I’ve been thinking over where you went wrong in this story. What Isaac needed was to have was an epiphany, a moment where it dawns on him that Eva Connealy is the right one for him. I think we need to back up to the scene where she comes over for supper. Instead of Isaac taking her home with Rachel and Adam, here’s what we’re going to do. We’re going to have him take Eva back alone. That way Rachel and Adam won’t be in his way. Then we’re going to have him accept her father’s invitation to go inside the house where they can talk. From there–

 

Ruth: Dave, hold on. What are you doing?

 

Dave: Rewriting your story. I’ll deal with the beginning where Isaac’s misled into thinking he’s attracted to that Craftsman girl. But the plot is going to change so that he realizes Eva is a much better match for him.

 

Neil Craftsman: That Craftsman girl? Is that how you refer to Emily?

 

Dave: I don’t believe this concerns you.

 

Neil: Oh, it concerns me a lot since your son is eloping with my daughter.

 

Dave: No such thing is going to happen. I have a copy of what Ruth wrote so far and have deleted everything up to the time when Isaac is about to take Eva back home. I’m going to write the rest of the story as it’s meant to be. Don’t worry, Ruth. You can still claim the story as yours. I don’t want any credit for it.

 

Neil: *rolls eyes* How noble of you.

 

Dave: Stay out of this, Craftsman. This has nothing to do with you.

 

Ruth: I’m not rewriting the story, Dave.

 

Dave: Oh, I know. You have that policy where your first draft is pretty much how the story is going to go because you hate going back and rewriting anything. Lucky for you, I don’t mind rewriting anything, so I’ll do all the work. There’s no need to worry about it. I got it all under control.

 

Ruth: Dave, I know this is hard for you to accept, but Isaac and Emily are going to end up together. I decided that back when I was writing Eye of the Beholder.

 

Dave: But you’ve said yourself that stories change as you write them. This is one of those stories. Isaac needs a good girl from a good family who will bless him. He’s only seventeen, so he doesn’t know the right one to pick. As his father, I have his best interest at heart.

 

Neil: Sounds to me like you’re trying to control a situation that can’t be controlled.

 

Dave: Why is he still here?

 

Neil: Because I’m a part of the story. A much more sane part, from the looks of it.

 

Dave: What is that supposed to mean?

 

Neil: It means that you need to get over the past so you can see clearly. No one can change the past, so why dwell on it? What we need to do is move on and do what it takes for the kids to be happy.

 

Dave: I don’t care what you do to make your daughter happy, but I know what I’m going to do to make my son happy. He’ll be happiest with Eva. She’s got a good heart and was brought up with fine, upstanding morals.

 

Neil: You just can’t resist an attempt to put me and my family down, can you?

 

Dave: I didn’t mention you. I was talking about Eva and her family.

 

Neil: And in doing so, you found a clever way of looking down your nose on me and my family, once again.

 

Dave: You read too much into things.

 

Neil: No, I don’t. I don’t know what kind of fool you take me for, but I’m not stupid.

 

Dave: I have deleted you from every part of this story, so your input is irrelevant here.

 

Neil: *laughs* Unbelievable. Ruth, he’s not in a little bit of denial; he’s completely immersed in it. Life won’t be looking so good to him when he realizes all of his rewriting will be for nothing. If I’m right, today, Isaac and Emily got married.

 

Ruth: Yes. It took until chapter 19, but they finally tied the knot. I swear, the whole book is about them eloping, and it took over half the thing to get them to elope.

 

Dave: That’s because they didn’t want to do it. You’re forcing them to do something against their will because you had this whole Romeo and Juliet thing planned. But you’re not Shakespeare, Ruth, and this isn’t Romeo and Juliet.

 

Ruth: Oh, I know. If Shakespeare was writing this, both Isaac and Emily would die at the end because you would make life so impossible for them that one would fake a suicide and the other would believe it and commit suicide for real. Then the other would wake up and commit suicide for real as well. Then where would the happy ending be? You should be glad I’m not Shakespeare because if I was, I might also have you commit suicide when you realize it was your stubborn pride that led them to kill themselves.

 

Neil: *snickers* That’s telling him, Ruth.

 

Dave: That’s ridiculous. If you refused to haul Neil off to jail when he abducted Mary, then you wouldn’t kill characters off like that. You have a surprising tolerance for unsavory characters.

 

Neil: Funny, Dave. One might think you’re talking about me in the “unsavory characters” remark.

 

Dave: Well, in that case I was.

 

Neil: You know, if you hadn’t been there when Mary got off the train when she first arrived in Omaha, everything would be different today.

 

Dave: All I did was marry the most wonderful girl in the world. You were the one who had to keep up with the snide remarks before you realized Cassie wasn’t worth it. You think I’ve forgotten all of that? Or do you think I’ve forgotten the kind of example you and Cassie were to Emily? Just what did Emily learn from you two? That marital vows aren’t sacred? That it’s okay to commit adultery?

 

Neil: I wasn’t unfaithful to Cassie.

 

Dave: And that time you went to see a prostitute while you were married–

 

Neil: I almost did, but I didn’t, and it was because of Emily that I decided not to.

 

Dave: The fact that you even thought about it is deplorable. I’d never consider doing that to Mary.

 

Neil: There you go again. You’re just so perfect, aren’t you? You’ve never done a single thing wrong in your entire life, so you can sit around and point your finger at those of us who screwed up and needed to be redeemed from our sins.

 

Ruth: Alright, guys. Let’s not get into a punching match. Dave, you’ll have to learn to forgive Neil and see him for who he is today. He’s not the same person he was in Eye of the Beholder. You’d actually like him if you gave him half a chance.

 

Dave: As I said earlier, I’ll be rewriting this story and sending it to you when I’m done. I figure it’ll take about a week or two to get everything right.

 

Ruth: Okay. Dave is currently in a very big case of denial.

 

***

 

Dave Larson Rewrites Isaac’s Decision (Includes Interview with Dave and Other Larsons)

Blog post made on 10/19/2011

 

Ruth Ann Nordin: So Dave Larson submitted his rewrite of Isaac’s Decision. I admit I’m shocked. I mean, I expected him to submit something, but I had no idea how much of a to-the-point kind of guy he is. I’m just going to have to post this so you know what I mean, and then I’ll bring him in here so I can talk to him about it.

 

Below is what he wrote. This is taken from the scene right after Eva came over for supper at the Larson house.

 

Isaac wasn’t sure if listening to his father was a good idea. But he knew his father had his best interest at heart, so he decided to take Eva home without any of his brothers or sisters tagging along. He took Eva home, and they had a wonderful conversation. He thought that maybe his father was right and he would give Eva a second chance.

 

When they arrived at her home, her father asked him if he wanted to visit for a while, and he agreed. Isaac had such a good time, he asked Eva if he could court her. She said yes but said she couldn’t officially be courted until after her teaching contract was over. Soon enough, it was, and they did. By the end of the year, they were married and lived happily ever after because she was a good wife who was a lot like his mother, and he had a wonderful mother.

 

The End

 

***

 

Ruth: See what I mean about how “to the point” Dave is? That was it. That’s how he’d have the rest of the entire book go.

 

Dave Larson: What’s wrong with that? Isaac ends up happy with Eva. That’s all you need to know.

 

Ruth: No, it isn’t. You basically gave a summary of the book.

 

Dave: I don’t understand what you mean by “summary”.

 

Ruth: What I mean is that all you did was tell. You did absolutely no showing.

 

Dave: Isn’t that what a story is? You tell what happens to the characters?

 

Ruth: While you can use some telling, you can’t tell the entire thing. You need dialogue and action. Otherwise, how are we supposed to be convinced Isaac really did fall in love with Eva?

 

Dave: What’s to convince? She’s the better choice.

 

Joel Larson: This is hilarious. Dave can’t come to grips with what’s happening in Isaac’s Decision, so he’s trying to rewrite the book.

 

Dave: Well, it beats your tactic. All you did was come into the interviews with all sorts of threats. Like it did you any good. You had to marry April anyway.

 

Joel: Hey, I’ll have you know that I’m very happy with the way Shotgun Groom ended. Ruth is a master storyteller.

 

Dave: Oh sure, you say that now. But for a while there, you were petitioning all her characters to go on a strike so she’d get writer’s block and be unable to finish your story. Then you emailed a few readers and requested 1-star reviews for the book if it was ever published.

 

Joel: So I did a couple of crazy things. I have since removed my petition to all characters–none signed it anyway–and apologized to those readers. I admitted I was wrong, and everything’s cool now. *grins wickedly* In fact, things are great.

 

Ruth: I’m glad to hear you’re happy with April.

 

April: Both of us are very happy. I admit I didn’t think you could pull it off when you started Shotgun Groom, but you did. After my horrible first marriage, I doubted the one with Joel would be good, but he’s so much better than Harvey.

 

Joel: Tell them the best part, sweetie.

 

April: What’s that?

 

Joel: How good I am in bed.

 

Dave: This isn’t about you two. It’s about my son. I’m trying to give him a good wife so he can be happy. And ick! No one cares how you are in the bedroom, Joel.

 

Joel: *rolls eyes* Sure, Dave. You requested at least three sex scenes in To Have and To Hold. I only got two in my book.

 

Dave: Because the readers don’t care about your sex life.

 

Joel: And they care about yours?

 

Dave: Well, they did want a second book featuring me.

 

Joel: That doesn’t mean they want to read bedroom scenes featuring you and Mary.

 

Ruth: Enough. I write sex scenes when, and as, they seem to fit into the story. The first thing a writer needs to learn is let the story lead him/her. And Dave, this is where you also messed up. You didn’t let the story go in the direction it wanted to. You forced it to bend to your will.

 

Tom: Oh Dave, just relax and go with the flow. Don’t try to change Isaac’s story. It’ll work out.

 

 

Joel: For once, Tom’s right. Ruth can work miracles. Why, because of her, Tom found a wife. That wouldn’t have happened otherwise.

 

Tom: You know what, Joel? Under ordinary circumstances, that comment would bother me, but we’re coming close to Thanksgiving and Christmas, so I’m determined to stay positive.

 

Joel: Is that what you call those goofy glasses and that Santa hat? Staying positive?

 

Tom: Nothing beats you in swim trunks. That was the goofiest picture of all times. Just for kicks, I’m going to post it so everyone can get a good laugh all over again.

 

 

April: I think Joel’s cute.

 

Joel: Thanks, April.

 

April: Of course, I prefer you with those off.

 

Joel: Have I told you how much I love you?

 

April: You might have mentioned it a time or two, but I don’t mind hearing it again.

 

Dave: This has got to be the stupidest interview ever written. Ruth, if you don’t like the way I wrote the story, then why don’t you go back and rewrite it so there’s the showing you prefer?

 

Ruth: I can only write the book as it’s meant to go. I can’t give Isaac to Eva. He’s been meant for Emily ever since Eye of the Beholder. I keep telling you that, but you refuse to listen. Hasn’t the scene where you learn that he eloped with Emily opened your eyes to this reality?

 

Dave: But the book hasn’t been published yet. Anything can happen.

 

Tom: It’ll be alright, Dave. Emily’s not going to bolt on Isaac. She won’t do all the awful things you fear. Remember, Ruth writes romances, not horror stories.

 

Joel: Yeah. Isaac will be just fine. You need to stop worrying and just trust the author to do her job.

 

April: I agree. Sit back and enjoy the story as she’s writing it.

 

Sally: David, this is crazy. You’re the only person I know who’d go through the trouble of trying to rewrite a book. You could be spending time with Mary instead. We all know how much you get jealous of the time you get to spend with her. I swear, when you were first married, you had that “no one sees her for an entire month except for one day” thing going on. Chill out.

 

Dave: That’s not fair, Sally. I only wanted to spend that month with her because I just married her. You get to see her plenty now.

 

Sally: Well, great. So Jenny and I’ll go shopping with her today. April, want to join us?

 

April: Sure. Sounds like fun.

 

Jenny: I got some money to burn. Let’s have a girl’s day out. Ma Larson said she’d watch all our kids. And Dave, don’t sweat it. If I could end up happily married to a man who wasn’t who I thought he was, then you won’t have any problems with Isaac and Emily. Remember, the point of romance is that it’s a romance. Emily wouldn’t be the heroine if she wasn’t going to be good to Isaac.

 

Sally: Well said, Jenny. Now can you relax, David?

 

Dave: I hope Ruth writes about your children so you understand how scary it can be to worry whether or not your children will end up with the right person. Ruth, you’ll consider my ending, won’t you?

 

Ruth: Nope. *leaves*

 

Dave: Ruth? I can reword it if it’ll make any difference. Ruth?

 

Tom: Oh, give up already. She’s not going to marry Isaac to Eva.

 

All but Dave: *leave*

 

Dave: I’ll submit a rewrite. I really think we can work something out.

 

Photo credits:

Tom with sunglasses and a Santa hat: ID 8196841 © Imagery Majestic | Dreamstime.com

Joel with swim trunks: ID 14578496 © Jason Stitt | Dreamstime.com

 

***

 

Dave Larson Gets Reviewed on His Ending of Isaac’s Decision

(Blog post made 10/20/2011)

 

Well, the reviews for Dave Larson’s rewrite of the ending of Isaac’s Decision have started coming into my inbox, so I thought I’d share them.

 

Here are the Glowing Reviews

 

REVIEW TITLE: A Masterpiece! (5 Stars)

REVIEWED BY: Not Dave Larson

 

This is such a great story! I worried that Isaac Larson, the hero of this book, who was brought up by good, respectable parents, would make the grievous mistake of choosing Emily, but suddenly at the very end, the book took a turn for the best. Whew! I was on pins and needles the whole time. Thank goodness he listened to his wise father and married someone like his mother, who is the best woman who ever lived!

 

REVIEW TITLE: The Most Well-Written Book on the Planet! (5+ Stars)

 

REVIEW BY: Not Dave Larson This Time Either

 

Wow! This book just blew me away. Well, not as much as Eye of the Beholder did. That was, by far, the best book ever written. But this one came second place. Okay. Maybe it won’t be as good as To Have and To Hold. But it’s definitely the best top three books that Dave Larson, I mean, Ruth Ann Nordin has ever written. What flair! What style! What mastery of the English language! Such superb talent should not go unnoticed. If there was a Writer’s Hall of Fame, Dave…I mean…Ruth would be right there. We should all aspire to write such grammatically correct and well-edited books such as this, and of course, Eye of the Beholder and To Have and To Hold.

 

REVIEW TITLE: Couldn’t Put It Down (5 stars)

 

REVIEW BY: An Uninterested Third Party Who Has Nothing To Gain By Posting This Review

 

I don’t usually read romances. In fact, I tend to stay away from them because of the predictability factor. I mean, it’s like, “Here’s a romance book,” and I’m like, “No!” and I run for the barn. So when I saw this book reviewed on Amazon by my super good friend who isn’t the author and isn’t affiliated with the author, I decided to trudge through another boring romance book. I settled into my recliner and bundled up under a blanket, sure I was going to fall asleep. And then I read page one. I’m telling you, it just blew me away! The twists, the turns! The anguish as Dave Larson tries to reach out and steer his innocent and naive son in the right direction. The gentle tenderness of Mary who once again brightens everyone’s day with one of her smiles! I laughed, I cried! I wished it could have gone on and on. Don’t think about reading this book. Read it! It will change your life forever. Buy it now! Now, I say! Did you click the “buy” button yet?

 

But there’s more. Here are the ones that aren’t so…flattering.

 

REVIEW TITLE: Dreadful. Absolutely Dreadful. (1 Star)

 

REVIEW BY: A Customer With No Ulterior Motive

 

I bought this book because I’ve enjoyed all the other Larson books Ms. Nordin has written, even though I’ve never felt the need to leave any sort of a review on those. However, I have decided to make my debut into the world of book reviews to warn everyone that this one is 100% drivel. Claptrap pure and simple. The book starts off well enough, and then suddenly it takes a giant nosedive and crashes and burns. It’s almost as if the author got tired of the book and handed it off to the worst ghostwriter in the world. After a bit more investigation, I learned this is EXACTLY what happened. Dave Larson, the hero’s father, decided to try his hand at writing, and let’s just say, he shouldn’t give up his farm. I swear, he is the worst writer ever! All he does is tell, tell, tell. Not that there’s much to tell. No. He wraps the whole thing up in two very rushed paragraphs, with the last couple words about his wife, not even the “heroine”. Talk about a jarring finish.

 

Furthermore, not only was the writing terrible at the end, I had steam spiraling out of my ears that Eva ended up being the heroine. Now, don’t get me wrong, I love a good surprise in books. But this was NOT a good surprise. This little twist took a delightful romance and turned it into a horror novel in the span of about eight sentences. My advice: do not let the sample fool you. This book is nothing more than a waste. A waste of time. A waste of money. And a waste of 300Kb on my Kindle. Deleted!

 

REVIEW TITLE: Seriously Needs an Editor. ASAP! (1 Star)

 

REVIEWED BY: An Unbiased Reader Who Is Not A Jealous Author In Disguise (I Sware!)

 

Where do I begin? This book, if you can call it that, read like the first draft of a high school student. This is what happens when we allow the onslaught of scribblers who decide to self-publish their craptastic work to the Internet. We exchange our hard earned money for ameteur writing. Sure, I got the refund, but I’ll never get back the brain cells I lost while reading this. I’d go through adn point out all the grammatical errors. but after finding 100 in the first chapter, I gave up. This is in dire need of an editor. Please, please, Ruth Ann Nordan, find an editor before you loose all your readers!

 

REVIEW TITLE: Something fishy’s going on here. (1 Star)

 

REVIEWED BY: Legitimate Reviewer Who Is Not an Author Competing With Nordin By Trying to Hurt Sales on Nordin’s Books By Leaving Bad Reviews so I Can Sell More of My Books Because I Believe Readers Only Read One Author and That’s It

 

Okay, something is seriously wrong with those 5-star reviews. They’re obviously sockpuppets of the author because I read this book, and it is bad. The worst! If I could give it 0 stars, I would. It was like Nordin went on a suck-a-thon writing session in an attempt to kill her career. Having your character write the end of the book for you? Lame. Way lame. I’m never reading another book by her again. There are so many other authors who are way better.

 

Quick Note:

 

One of the 1-star reviews is actually one a friend sent me as a joke, and I laughed so hard that I had to make this post. So this post was just for fun.

 

***

 

Dave Larson Rewrites His Ending for Isaac’s Decision

and What Others Have To Say About It

(Blog posted made on 10/22/2011)

 

As unbelievable as it may sound, Dave wanted another go at writing the ending of Isaac’s Decision. (Remember, this is from the time Eva Connealy came over for supper at the Larsons.) Dave submitted this to me today…

 

Dave Larson’s second ending for Isaac's Decision

 

Isaac was confused. He didn’t know what to do. Supper had ended. He had to take Eva home. He didn’t want to be alone with Eva. He doubted she was the right one for him. His brothers and sisters were too busy or sick to tag along in the sleigh. He had no choice.

On his way to get the horse and sleigh, a commotion occurred in the barn. He ran to find out what was going on. “Oh no!” he said in alarm and raced for the danger. Quick to action, he entered the barn. He was very smart, so he saw the problem right away.

There was a fire in the corner stall. One of his brothers forgot to take the lantern into the house, and the horse knocked it over. Without thought to his own personal safety, he grabbed the blanket from the sleigh. He ran to the stall. He pulled the horse out and tied him to a beam with the quickness that came from years of farming. Then he threw the blanket on the hay. He stomped on the flames. They were hot. He was a man and braved the pain because men are tough. The fire died down. The barn was saved.

He took the lantern and blanket out of the stall. He put the horse into the stall.

“I will go see what Isaac is doing,” Eva said. She walked to the barn.

Isaac was on his way out of the barn. Eva was entering the barn. Something fell from the rafters. Oh no! Isaac thought in great alarm. The rake is going to hit Eva! With no thought to himself, for men desire to protect women, he rushed for her. In one heroic move, he lifted her into his arms and caught the rake.

“Isaac, you are so brave,” Eva said. “Women like brave men.”

He took a good look at her. He finally understood why he should pick her instead of Emily. “I am brave,” he said.

“And strong,” Eva said.

“Yes,” he said. “I am strong and brave.” He set her down and put the rake in a safe place. “I will take you home.”

“Thank you,” she said.

He took her home.

What a nice young man who was brought up right, she thought.

I think she might be perfect for me, he thought.

He pulled up in front of her house. Her father invited him into the house. He played chess and checkers. He had a good time. As he was on his way to the door, he decided to say, “Eva, can I court you?”

“Only after I am done with my teaching contract,” she said.

“Good.”

And he did. Then he got married. It was a good day. Everyone was happy.

 

The End

 

Okay. So some characters wanted to stop by and comment on his new ending, starting with Joel.

 

 

Joel: I’m not related to you, Dave.

 

Dave: There’s nothing wrong with it. I gave dialogue and action this time. I avoided all the telling I did before.

 

Joel: Just how old are you? It’s like one of those kids’ books. See Spot. See Spot Run. Run, Spot, Run. Then you had Eva pop up out of nowhere as she’s heading for the barn. You shift points of view. That blanket would have been in the house (not the sleigh) so it’d be warm when it was time to leave. Then that rake came out of nowhere. Who, or what, threw it? And, as if that wasn’t bad enough, the dialogue was stupid. No one talks like that. Man, I’m so glad I didn’t take you up on your offer to rewrite the ending of my story at the chapter I was forced to marry April. I can just imagine what you would have come up with. Ick! Even Tom could do a better job. And that’s saying a lot!

 

Tom: What was missing was humor. I think there’s potential in this rewrite.

 

Joel: I take back what I said. I don’t have any brothers. Well, besides Richard. But no one ever sees him, so it’s easy to forget he even exists.

 

Tom: You’re being too hard on Dave, Joel. He improved a lot from his last ending. With a little tweaking, we can get something doable here.

 

Dave: Thank you, Tom. I’m glad someone is the voice of reason.

 

Joel: Two idiots working on a story. God help us all. Ruth’s career is officially over. I can see it now. Isaac’s holding Eva and the rake at the same time–something I find hard to picture, by the way–and a mouse scampers by so he gets all scared like Tom does and drops the rake and Eva. *shudders* With Tom’s clumsiness, I think we all know where the rake will end up.

 

Tom: Will you never let me forget about the hair incident?

 

Joel: It wasn’t just Jessica’s hair you ruined. There was the vase you almost broke, the many times you tripped when you were around her and–

 

Tom: I get it, already!

 

Dave: I’m not going to make my son a klutz.

 

Isaac: You’re not going to make your son anything. I’m not marrying Eva. How many times do I have to tell you that? Ugh! I’ve told you three or four times already, but you refuse to listen to me.

 

Dave: And you haven’t listened to me. I keep telling you what Emily’s upbringing was like. You have to look at a young woman’s past in order to determine how she’s going to be as a wife.

 

Isaac: I’m getting a headache. I’m only seventeen, and I have a headache! All we ever do is go in circles. Something has to be done to break the cycle.

 

Dave: I just want what’s best for you.

 

Sally: I can’t take this anymore. David Jeremiah Larson, if you do another rewrite of your son’s story, I will make it a point to go to your house and destroy it and the computer you keep snagging from Ruth. You need to let your son be an adult. He’s old enough to make his own decisions. And like I told you in the story, you knew nothing about Mary when you married her except that she came from Maine as a mail-order bride for Neil. You didn’t know anything about her upbringing, and judging from what is planned for your second story, To Have and To Hold, she’s got a couple of unsavory family members. If you would have judged her based on her family, I doubt you would have married her.

 

Dave: That’s different.

 

Sally: Why? Because it’s you and not Isaac? Are we doing the whole “Practice what I preach and not what I do” routine?

 

Dave: Stay out of this, Sally. You and your husband have done enough damage in my son’s life, and now I have to clean it up.

 

Rick: I don’t appreciate the way you’re talking to my wife, Dave.

 

Sally: Thank you, Rick.

 

Rick: Isaac marrying Emily isn’t the end of the world. For sure, it’s a lot better than what you’re writing. I agree with Joel. The whole thing was painful to read.

 

Joel: Yeah, so painful I got a cramp in my side from laughing. I had no idea Dave could write that badly. Dave, I hope you keep working on the farm because you have no career as a writer.

 

Dave: Did I ask for your opinion?

 

Joel: Weren’t the reviews you got the other day enough for you to see how much you suck?

 

Dave: I have the most uncaring, insensitive family of everyone on the planet. None of my wishes are being met by the author when I did my part in Eye of the Beholder and did everything the way she wanted me to. I didn’t tell Neil off in front of everyone like I wanted to, and I didn’t have him arrested at the train station when he abducted my wife. I sat by and let him get his “second chance” in His Redeeming Bride–a book I still can’t bring myself to read. I didn’t protest when Mary needed to be called in at the end of that book to save Neil’s sorry butt. And now that I’ve made a simple request for my son to marry Eva instead of Emily, everyone’s jumping all over me.

 

Tom: Well, maybe if you read His Redeeming Bride, you’ll understand that Neil paid for all the bad stuff he did. You seem to think he never had to pay for the things he did. And hey, it’s not like we all got what we wanted in our stories. I, for one, never got my wedding night, and everyone else got theirs.

 

(Ruth: I added the wedding night in 2015, so Tom was right at this time.)

 

Joel: Kind of. I didn’t have sex with April the day we got married. I was too upset about the wedding.

 

Tom: But you still got a sex scene in your book. I’m the only one with a G-rated book.

 

Sally: That was actually a good thing, Tom. With how clumsy you were, I don’t think it’d be a good idea to have people witness you fumbling around in the bedroom. Really, it was embarrassing enough to see you knock over someone at the barn dance and then get Jessica’s hair tangled up in your shirt cuff at the beginning of the book

 

Tom: Dave, you are not the only one with insensitive family members, okay? Do you see the abuse I take all the time?

 

Joel: Abuse? You forced me into a marriage I didn’t want.

 

Ruth: Oh brother. I’m in a real bind. These people can argue all night if I let them. There’s only one way I can think of to end this post on a satisfactory note.

 

Mary: Hey, everyone. I made some apple pies. Do you all want a slice?

 

Everyone: *scurries on over to the kitchen*

 

Ruth: Thanks, Mary. It’s nice to know I can always count on you and your pies to get me out of a bind.

 

Mary: Anytime.

 

Picture credits:

Joel shocked by Dave’s awful writing: ID 19812969 © Jason Stitt | Dreamstime.com

 

***

 

Interview With Characters in Isaac’s Decision In Regards to Changing the Story on Me

(Blog post made on 10/26/2011)

 

Ruth: Something that never fails to surprise me is how much a story can change from how I originally thought it would go. Isaac’s Decision is turning out to be pretty much the exact opposite of how I thought it would be. For one, Emily and Isaac were supposed to elope a lot sooner than they did. And two, Isaac was supposed to be in such a hurry to marry Emily that he failed to get a place to live and a job first.

 

Isaac: Which would make me look irresponsible, and I’m not irresponsible. Seriously, I’d be the laughingstock of the Nebraska Series if I followed your plan.

 

Ruth: You weren’t going to be irresponsible. You were going to be young and rash.

 

Isaac: In short, I was supposed to be stupid.

 

Ruth: No, you weren’t supposed to be stupid. You were just supposed to be overwhelmed by the responsibility of being a husband and the idea of impending fatherhood.

 

Isaac: What you fail to understand is that back in the 1890s, people married earlier than they do today. It wasn’t uncommon for a seventeen-year-old to get married and assume the duties as a husband and father. We didn’t go to college or spend years dating someone before we settled down. That’s why I’d be the laughingstock in front of all the other characters.

 

Ruth: Well, this has completely changed 80% of the book. It looks nothing at all like I intended when I started it.

 

Dave: Haha! Not so fun when someone does something opposed to what you want, is it?

 

 

Ruth: What are you holding there, Dave?

 

Dave: It’s my statement to the world. If no one buys your books, maybe you’ll start listening to your characters. After all, without us you wouldn’t have a story.

 

Ruth: Hmm… So I take this to mean you’re going on strike?

 

Dave: Yep.

 

Ruth: So I guess you don’t want to be in To Have and To Hold. Should I kill you off and give Mary to someone else?

 

Dave: You can’t do that because I’m in Isaac’s Decision. In fact, I seem to be the only one responsible for the conflict. Without me, there’d be no plot because everything would be sunshine and flowers. People don’t read books if there’s no conflict.

 

Ruth: I very well can remove you. I’d delete you from Isaac’s Decision and make Neil have the hang up that provides the conflict.

 

Neil: That would never work.

 

Dave: Thank you.

 

Neil: I’m not as uptight as little Mr. Perfect Larson is.

 

Dave: What?

 

Neil: I think you heard me.

 

Dave: Look here, pal, I’ve had all I can take from you.

 

Neil: Yeah, well I can say the same thing. I’ve had all I can take of your holier than thou attitude. I swear, one would think you could tell God to move over because you’re so much better than everyone else.

 

Joel: That’s not true, Neil.

 

Dave: Thank you, Joel.

 

Joel: If Dave was perfect, he would do a much better job of writing books. I’ve read some bad ones in my time, but nothing is as awful as what he creates. I mean, rakes flying out of nowhere, being told that Isaac magically changes his mind without sufficient motivation, lame dialogue–

 

Dave: Mind your own business, Joel.

 

Neil: What’s the problem, Dave? Can’t take a little constructive criticism?

 

Dave: I can take it just fine. It just depends on the source.

 

Joel: Who better than your brother to tell you the truth? Would you rather hear it from a stranger?

 

Dave: Don’t you have someone else to bug, like Tom?

 

Joel: Not today.

 

Tom: Did someone say my name?

 

Joel: No. This has nothing to do with you.

 

Tom: I’m pretty sure I heard my name.

 

Joel: While listening to music?

 

Tom: It’s not music. It’s an audiobook, thank you very much.

 

Joel: Let me guess? The Little Engine That Could?

 

Tom: No. Why would you think I’m listening to a kid’s book?

 

Joel: Well, you should. Not only is it a lot better than what Dave comes up with, but it’ll teach you to keep trying because one of these days, you might succeed at something.

 

Dave: You two need to get out of here. This has nothing to do with either one of you. You aren’t even in Isaac’s Decision.

 

Joel: Which is good if you insist on rewriting it. I don’t want my name associated with your penmanship, or as I term it “crapmanship”.

 

Neil: *chuckles* Pretty clever there, Joel.

 

Dave: No, it’s not clever. It’s stupid.

 

Joel: It’s a whole lot better than your writing.

 

Ruth: This is exactly why Isaac’s Decision didn’t go according to plan. Dave and Neil decided to hijack a good portion of the book, and it’s taking Sarah and Mary to smooth out the kinks.

 

Neil: What’s wrong with that?

 

Ruth: It isn’t your story. It’s Isaac and Emily’s.

 

Emily: I actually prefer this version. I didn’t feel like running off to Missouri and finding my real mother. I know you want me to dwell on her, but I’d rather not. I’d rather focus on positive things, like what Isaac and I have together.

 

Isaac: Exactly. There’s no need for all that drama. Plus, back then, what were the chances a young woman is really going to travel by herself? It’s not like it is today where it happens all the time.

 

Ruth: It could happen, Isaac.

 

Isaac: But the probability wasn’t as good. Besides, if you check your history, you’ll know that when women immigrated to America in the 1890s, they were detained until it was assured that someone could care for and protect them. Today, a woman can go wherever without such a hindrance.

 

Ruth: Oh come on, Isaac. You can’t generalize this for all women everywhere. Carrie Ingalls won a homestead in a lottery in her mid-thirties, which was around 1905, and she maintained it all by herself. If she could do this by herself, then there were things women did without men, even if it wasn’t the norm of the day.

 

Emily: I don’t want my book to end up as a history lesson. I just want to marry Isaac and live happily ever after with him. The hard part was getting him to admit his feelings for me. After that, why put me through more pain than I have to? So what if the parents have to work things out so Dave and Neil can bury the hatchet and move on?

 

Ruth: It lessens your “spotlight” to do that.

 

Emily: So I get less scenes in the book. As long as no one falls asleep while reading it, who cares?

 

Joel: As long as Dave isn’t writing it, that shouldn’t be a problem.

 

Isaac: True. I sounded like a complete idiot in his second rewrite. “I am brave.” “I am brave and strong.” “I will take you home.” No one talks like that.

 

Joel: That’s what I’ve been saying all along.

 

Dave: Well, that’s gratitude for you. Don’t either of you ask me for favors in the future because I’m not doing them. *leaves*

 

Isaac: The story is going along fine. We’re changing the story only because it’s better the way we envision it. You need to trust your characters to do the right thing.

 

Ruth: I guess I have no choice since you all run the show. Very well. We’ll see how things turn out. And you better do a good job because, unlike Dave, I don’t like doing rewrites.

 

Photo credits:

Dave calls for ban on my books: File ID: 3303435, © Yuri_arcurs | Dreamstime.com, purchased on 10/26/2011, no longer available; text calling for the ban mine (made it in GIMP)

 

***

 

The Characters Have a Meeting Without Me

(Blog post made on 10/30/2011)

 

Dave: I win! Ruth Ann Nordin has severe writer’s block! She stalled out on Isaac’s Decision and can’t go on. This is the best day ever. Now Isaac won’t end up with Emily, and better yet, he might even end up with Eva! I give myself two thumbs up for what Joel was unable to do during the writing of his book.

 

Joel: I’m going to kill you.

 

Dave: Why? This has nothing to do with you.

 

Joel: Yes, it does. In case you haven’t noticed, Shotgun Groom is due out around November 15. If she gets writer’s block so bad she can’t proceed with her books, then my book will never see the light of day. It’ll end up in the saddest place a book can go…the computer’s hard drive where it’ll stay forever. No one ever reads those books, Dave!

 

Dave: Oh come on. You’re overreacting.

 

Joel: She hasn’t written anything new in the past two days, thanks to you. That means Her Heart’s Desire and To Have and To Hold are currently stalled in addition to Isaac’s Decision. Your ridiculous antics have led to a chain reaction that could shut her down for good.

 

April: Move aside, Joel. I got something hot and sticky to pour on his head.

 

Joel: Moving aside, April. Give it to him, good!

 

Dave: You can’t be serious.

 

April: Deadly. You know how long it took for me to get Joel to agree to be a happy husband? For the longest time, all he did was mope and complain about how horrible having a wife was. And now that I won, you’re making all my patience and hard work for nothing.

 

Joel: Um, you mean that we both won, right?

 

April: What? Oh, okay. Yes, we both won.

 

Isaac: And people wonder why I eloped! There’s absolutely no getting through to you, Pa. I swear, talking to you is like talking to a brick wall.

 

Dave: Well, you don’t need to worry now. I’ve taken care of everything. You don’t have to try to battle feeling guilty while you talk to that Craftsman girl.

 

Joel: April, that hot and sticky substance you got isn’t enough. We need to get something hard and wooden to whack some sense into Dave. Got a thick tree branch where you’re at?

 

Emily: We don’t have to resort to violence, everyone.

 

Isaac: We don’t?

 

Emily: Of course not. There’s a very logical way out of this which will enable me to marry you, get Her Heart’s Desire and To Have and To Hold back on track, and make sure that Shotgun Groom goes out as planned.

 

Isaac: What’s that?

 

Emily: We kill Dave off. I think if he dies somewhere between Shotgun Groom and To Have and To Hold, we can still give Mary amnesia so she won’t mourn his passing. I’d hate to give her any grief since she’s been nothing but kind to me. Then Mary finds someone else who won’t have the hang ups Dave does. He’ll no longer bother Ruth, and we’ll save her from any more grief in the future.

 

Joel: That’s not a bad idea. I vote for this guy. His name is Howard. He can be some guy who lost his farm in a big locust swarm or something. Maybe he’s a widower. I can fix him up with Mary.

 

April: Where do you know Howard from?

 

Joel: He can be a friend I acquire between Shotgun Groom and To Have and To Hold. He’ll be lonely and looking for a wife, and there will be Mary who can’t run a farm by herself.

 

Dave: That’s enough, Joel and Emily! Ruth can’t get rid of me, no matter how much you two want it.

 

April: Make that three people who want it.

 

Dave: Fine. No matter how everyone but my son wants to kill me off, it’s not happening. I am too important to the Nebraska Series.

 

Joel: Dave, when you walk into a room, how does your big ego fit through the door?

 

Dave: I don’t see any emails coming in for you or any of the other heroes in Ruth’s books like the ones that come in for me.

 

Joel: April, make that branch extra thick. Maybe we can knock that enormous ego out of him.

 

Mary: Hold on, everyone. I see no reason to attack or kill Dave.

 

Dave: Thank you, Mary.

 

Mary: Because there’s no point. If Ruth can’t finish Isaac’s Decision with Isaac and Emily ending up together, then she won’t be writing any more books. And if she won’t be writing any more books, then To Have and To Hold will never be completed.

 

Dave: Well, yes. That’ll have to be the way it goes.

 

Mary: One might think it’s unfortunate. Here we are currently at the point where I’ve lost my memory but am starting to realize what a wonderful man I married. And one of the upcoming scenes will involve me with my husband in the bedroom, this time without any clothes on–

 

Dave: What?

 

Mary: And Ruth was planning on three or four sex scenes in the book, which is far more than what she usually gives to any other romance she’s done.

 

Dave: You know, I might have been too hasty to do some of the things I’ve done in the past few interviews.

 

Mary: But it’s fine. We don’t need another book. We already have Eye of the Beholder. No other character gets two books where they get to be the main characters, so we don’t need a second one.

 

Dave: Now, wait. Let’s not be hasty. We should have another book dedicated to you, Mary. And when I think of it, you show up quite a bit in Isaac’s Decision, too. If it means Isaac marries Emily, then I’ll go along with it. Who knows? Maybe it won’t be so bad.

 

Joel: Oh brother. *rolls eyes*

 

April: At least, Shotgun Groom will be out in November.

 

Isaac: I’m just going to pretend I didn’t hear anything my mother said. *goes to wash his mind out with soap*