‘Make sure you get right into the corners. That’s where the dust gathers.’ That evening, after our trip into Kirrinporth, Mam leaned over the bar and pointed to where I was sweeping. Deliberately, I angled the broom so it got into the little nooks and crannies she always worried about me neglecting, and made sure there was no dirt there. There wasn’t. There never was. The pub was spotless.
‘Good girl,’ Mam said. I gave her a quick smile and carried on sweeping, though I couldn’t see the point. But Mam was strange this evening. Skittish and nervy. Jumping at every sound.
A clink of glass made me look up and I saw her pouring herself a drink. Another one. She’d been drinking steadily since we’d got home, ignoring my worried glances.
I finished the sweeping and tidied away the broom, but Mam caught me by the arm as I was heading back upstairs to my room.
‘Polish the brasses for me,’ she said. I looked at her, wondering why she wanted me to stay. She was normally happy enough on her own. Her fingers dug into my arm. ‘Won’t take long, Em,’ she said.
I nodded and she let me go.
‘Polish is on the side.’
She handed me a cloth and with a sigh, she slumped down on to a chair, watching the door just as she had done all evening.
As I finished polishing the brass, the inn door opened, bringing the night air inside, and a man came in, stomping his feet on the doorstep and trailing mud over the freshly swept floor. I blinked in surprise at the unexpected guest. He was tall, with a travelling cape over his shoulders and a three-cornered hat pulled down low over his brow. I couldn’t see his face.
‘Janey Moon,’ he said to Mam with a broad smile. ‘It’s been too long.’
Mam had stood when the door opened and now she stayed frozen on the spot, a fixed smile on her face.
‘Evening,’ she said. Was there a tremor in her voice? I thought so. ‘I’ve been expecting you.’
‘I didn’t think you’d hold out so long,’ he said. Under the shadow cast by his hat, I saw his lips twist into a smile. ‘I must confess, I’m impressed.’
Mam said nothing and the man nodded. ‘So, we have a deal?’
‘I didn’t say that.’
‘You will,’ he said. He pulled his hat from his head and with a terrifying start of recognition, I saw the white streak gleaming in his dark hair. This was Cal Morgan – the man who’d killed Da.
‘Mam,’ I squeaked, terror clenching my throat. My voice was tiny, and even in the quiet inn, it didn’t carry far enough for Mam to hear. She didn’t even glance in my direction; all her focus on Morgan.
‘What if I don’t?’
Morgan laughed. ‘Why wouldn’t you?’ he said. ‘I’m not asking you to do this for nothing, Janey. You’ll be rewarded, of course. Handsomely.’ He looked round. ‘Seems you could do with getting some drinkers back here. I can help with that, too. When the time’s right.’
Mam’s head drooped, just for a second, then she pulled her shoulders back. ‘Do I have a choice?’
Morgan laughed again, loudly, making me wince. ‘There’s always a choice, Janey.’ He pulled up a chair and sat on it the wrong way round, resting his crossed arms on the back. ‘But why would you say no? I’m offering you enough money that you never need to go hungry again. You and your brat of a daughter.’
For the first time, he looked round the inn and saw me standing there. His eyes rested on me for a second in a way that made me feel exposed and on display.
‘Well I never,’ he said. ‘You’re the Moon girl?’
I nodded and he smiled at me approvingly. ‘All grown up, eh?’
He turned to Mam. ‘I’ve got plenty of soldier friends who’d pay for a night with a pretty girl like that. If she was made available to them.’
Heat flooded my cheeks. I looked at Mam, but she kept her eyes fixed on Morgan.
‘What are you saying?’ she asked.
He stood up and took a step towards her. He towered over her as he looked down, running his eyes over her like she was a pig going to market. My mother had always been small and curvy, with wild dark hair and eyes that flashed with fun. Now she was thin and her eyes were sad, but it seemed Morgan liked what he saw.
‘I’m saying you seem to have misunderstood what I’m offering,’ he said. ‘I’m doing you a favour, not the other way round. I’ll pay you for the use of the inn, and you can make it your business to keep me happy when I’m here.’
‘With drinks?’ Mam said in a small voice.
‘That too.’ He gave her a broad smile. ‘And if you won’t cooperate, maybe I’ll try your daughter instead.’
Mam swallowed. ‘I’m sure we can come to an arrangement,’ she said.
‘Clever girl.’
‘Should we discuss it in private?’
‘I think that would be best,’ Morgan said. He reached out a hand and with his thick fingers, traced a line down Mam’s cheek. She stood there and let him touch her, but I knew she didn’t like it. ‘Just you and me,’ he said. ‘Come on.’
Silently, Mam turned and let him follow her out of the bar, through the door that led upstairs, and I heard the steps creaking as she took him into her room.
I stayed where I was, frozen with fear. He’d killed my father and now he was making my mother do his bidding. His nasty, twisted bidding. What I didn’t understand was what he wanted the inn for. What did we have that was so precious to him that he’d kill Da and hurt Mam?
After what seemed like hours, Mam and Morgan came back downstairs. There was a red mark across Mam’s cheek and her eyes were dull. She poured herself a drink and knocked it back in one gulp.
‘Mr Morgan’s going to be doing some business from the inn,’ she said to me. Her voice was casual but she couldn’t meet my gaze.
Morgan chuckled loudly.
‘Business,’ he said. ‘That’s right.’ He took a pouch of money from his pocket and threw it on the bar where it landed with a loud jangle of coins. Mam’s cheeks were flushed with drink or shame. I couldn’t tell which. But she picked up the pouch and stuffed it in her skirt anyway.
Morgan laughed again and crossed the bar in just a couple of strides of his long legs. ‘I’ll be back,’ he said, over his shoulder.
Mam didn’t look at me. She just reached out her hand and I gave her the cloth I’d been using to polish the surfaces. ‘You can go and hide in your room now,’ she said. ‘Do your drawing.’
I wanted to say something, but as usual, I didn’t have the words. Instead I touched her lightly on the arm and then I turned and fled upstairs.