THE ADVENTURER’S GUIDE TO TAVERNS SAYS THE FOLLOWING:

While any recounting of a heroic journey inevitably mentions a stop at some warm and inviting village tavern, the experienced traveler knows to be wary, as not all taverns are the safe havens the stories claim them to be. Consider the Polka Dot Dragon Tavern, for example, where any nondragon patrons could easily find themselves turned into an appetizer if they’re not careful. Or consider the Inn of Pancakes and Death, where they do indeed serve the best pancakes in the Hierarchy, but the cost is steep. Very steep. And don’t forget the Small Yappy Dogs Pub. Patrons who stay inside longer than three minutes lose their minds.

Above them all, however, sits an establishment that shall not be named. Its well-worn tabletops and mismatched chairs strike terror into the heart of even the fiercest warrior. Those brave souls who have summoned the courage to set foot inside its unevenly plastered walls speak of it only in hushed tones—when they dare speak of it at all.

If you do go, be on your guard and make sure to comb your beard.

Bob is watching.