How to give wholeheartedly – even if we’re not feeling it

So what about the times when giving doesn’t feel ‘wholehearted’ or authentic? After all, if the intention behind the giving is so important, why give when there’s no good to give?

Because…

Sometimes we’ve just gotta. Because it’s the ‘right’ thing to do. Because you’ll save yourself the belly ache of not doing so. Or because sometimes – and I don’t know what your circumstance or how this is hitting you right now – it can soften a relationship or be the beginnings of a humble reunion.

Here are some suggestions.

Let’s say someone is rubbing you up the wrong way and you don’t feel like giving your time and energy (cash doesn’t even need to come into it). How about starting with a silent blessing?

‘Thank you for the lesson you’re bringing to my life. This situation in which I feel stuck and blocked is being held up in front of me as a mirror reflecting exactly what it is that I still need to work on.’

It doesn’t mean that you’re right and they are wrong or that you’re the better person for giving. It’s actually an exercise in surrender. You’re loosening your grip on the angst you have in relation to that person. Soften on the situation and watch it change. It’s not giving in. It’s giving the situation over to some great mysterious force that has greater organising power than you could ever know. Work with it. Not against it.

Or perhaps there’s a gift that you have to buy for another, but it feels like an obligation. How about investing in a charity for them? That way you get to choose a cause that you believe in and want to put positive energy behind, while also bypassing inauthenticity.