Later that night, while Frankie couldn’t sleep, she opened her email and typed a long letter to her mom and dad. She told them how much she appreciated their support and how it gave her the courage to take on the challenge of Aunt Beth’s house. She emailed her brother next to tell him that she missed him and asked how his life was going. She insisted, just short of begging, that they all come for Christmas.
Still restless, she spent a bit of time browsing the internet. Her fingers hovered over the keys. She knew Ryan would tell her whatever she wanted to know. She only had to ask. Still, she typed his name into Google. Images popped up immediately. Ryan in uniform. Ryan in a tux. Ryan in interviews. Ryan with a stunning brunette plastered to his side. Victoria wore a sleek red gown in one photo, her mile-long legs exposed by the slit that went all the way to her hip. The gown plunged from the shoulders to her naval. Frankie’s stomach twisted at the sight of Victoria’s long red nails resting on Ryan’s chest. He was smiling, but if she looked close, it wasn’t one of the smiles she knew. It was tighter. Forced. Or maybe she just wanted to believe that. She wanted to believe that he could be happy—was happy—here with her.
She clicked on one of the articles that spoke about the drug charges being dropped.
Currently, all bets are off. When Ryan Walker was suspended, rumors swirled that he’d save face and retire. But now, with his name being cleared, Commissioner Samson has made it clear he doesn’t want the heavy hitter for the Angels to put away his bat just yet.
Dale Jennings, coach for the Angels was quoted saying, “There’s more in store for Ryan Walker. Everyone makes mistakes and I’m hopeful that Ryan will let us make up for ours. We followed protocol. We had to put him on leave but I understand that a man has his pride. We’re his family and he feels like we didn’t stand by him when we should have. For that, I’m deeply sorry. I only hope we get a chance to make it up to him. There’s still so much left to his career.”
Sources tell us that Walker is hiding out in a small town in western Minnesota. For a man who can hit it out of the park, literally, we’re surprised that he’s walked away from the only career he’s ever known. Baseball is Ryan Walker’s life. Letting it go would be lying down to die. What is he without America’s favorite sport?
Ex-wife Victoria Garcia told reporters, “Baseball is the only thing that matters to Ryan. I’ll be shocked if he isn’t back here by the start of training camp. And when he is, when all of the dust settles, I’ll be here for him, just as I was during our marriage. It’s not easy to be married to someone so consumed by a sport. It’s everything to him. But I can accept it, because I understand him. We’re on amicable terms and speak frequently. He needed some time away but he’ll be back. He’s nothing without baseball.”
Only time will tell if we’ll see Walker back in uniform and taking home plate. Walker’s lawyer was unavailable for comment.
Frankie clicked the x to close the tab and squeezed her eyes shut. Had he been offered the chance to go back? She knew he’d had his name cleared and that the commissioner was calling him. To apologize, Ryan had told her, but he didn’t answer any of the calls. He couldn’t say Victoria’s name without sneering so there was no way he was talking to her frequently. Frankie shut down the laptop, hoping the images of his flawless ex would not haunt her sleep. This town had nothing, even if it was rebuilding and growing. It wasn’t far from bigger towns, but it sure as heck wasn’t LA. Frankie believed him when he said he cared. She could see it in his eyes and feel it in the way he touched her; the way he was always touching her. But part of her had loved Robert as well. Not anywhere near the way she loved Ryan. But still, she’d cared for him. And it hadn’t been enough. Was she enough for Ryan? For the boys? Her family? Chloe’s words came back to her. She hadn’t been a great friend. She’d thought only of what she wanted. Was still thinking of what she wanted. And what if, no matter how badly she wanted things to work out, they just weren’t meant to?
Pushing away from the table, she went to the patio door, and looked up at the Minnesota sky. She loved it here. Even without Ryan and the boys, she felt at peace here, like she could stop searching for a missing piece of herself. Of course, without Ryan, there would be emptiness where there hadn’t been and she had no idea how she’d fill that void.
Don’t borrow trouble. She laughed at her own trite thought.
Her phone buzzed on the table and she smiled, seeing Ryan’s text on her screen.
My bed is too big without you
She tapped her fingers over the letters, telling him it was good to miss her now and again.
I miss you whenever I’m not with you. Come over.
She hesitated. It was so easy to fall into him every night. Every minute. But she’d meant to come here and learn how to fall into herself. Rely on herself. She wasn’t clingy by nature but the level of need she felt for Ryan was unlike anything she’d ever known.
You there?
She texted to tell him she was just tired and going to crawl into bed. Chloe was there after all.
Ok. Sweet dreams.
She hoped so. She texted a quick “you too” and waited.
Tomorrow night, no excuses. I sleep better beside you.
She smiled, sending him heart emoticons, feeling like even text words were too much for her right now. She slept better beside him, too. They shared the same feelings. They were in this together. Putting the article out of her head, she crawled between her sheets, her phone beside her, re-reading his words. She wasn’t in this alone.