I hadn’t been able to sleep at all. Katie came, sleepy-eyed, into our bedroom around two, settling between us. She’d had a nightmare and fell asleep before she could tell me what it was about.
My mind was a whirling dervish.
AO was real. He had to be. And he had complete and total control over me. I mean, I should have been snatched by the police by now. Not once did I ever try to hide my face or actions. I just jumped in the most conspicuous car in the state and mowed people down with a semi-automatic and a damn scimitar. When people saw me, and there had to be more witnesses than I even knew about, what did they see? Did they all see a meek rabbi? Or did some see a Hispanic man with a scar atop one eye or a plump Chinese guy with long hair and horn-rimmed glasses? It sounded ridiculous, but I was beginning to think that when it came to AO, anything was possible.
AO had gotten me to kill, forcing pain on me until I did his bidding. And somehow, in the process of becoming a mass murderer, I was morphing into something else, something that was not me at all.
And now AO could talk to me anywhere and any time he wanted. I stiffened at the thought of him speaking as my family slept beside me. Would they be able to hear him now, too? Did he gain strength as the world weakened?
For the first time since I was a kid, I prayed. When I said every prayer I could remember, skipping some lines, messing up others, I said them again, tears silently leaking from my eyes. I prayed until the sun came up, knowing it would never be enough.
* * * * *
“We need milk and bread and some other things, but I’m afraid to leave the house,” Candy said. Katie sat on my lap, trying to get me to be silly with her. I was a zombie. I could barely comprehend what she was saying.
“Wh-what?” I asked, running Katie’s hair through my fingers.
Candy had her phone in her hand, hitting the speed dial for her mother. Since yesterday the “all circuits are busy, please hang up and call again” message had played in a maddening loop. “I said we’re running out of the food basics. But I don’t think it’s safe for any of us to leave the house.”
While we slept, the last vestiges of normalcy had simply slipped away. Over the course of nine hours, chaos had been given an inch and taken a yard. People were urged, no, ordered, to stay in their homes. The National Guard had been called to so many places, there was no way they could be everywhere they were needed. Cities were burning from looters. First responders were lying in overcrowded hospitals, felled by a contagion that had yet to be named, but had done more damage in less time than the great influenza epidemic of 1918. Hurricanes battered the southern coasts on both sides and tornadoes popped up in places that had never seen a twister.
“I’ll go,” I said.
“No, Daddy, stay here and play with me. Can you get Elefun from my closet?”
“I will when I get back, sweetie,” I said, transferring her to a chair.
The phone beeped as Candy hung up. She’d slept like a log, but there were dark circles under her eyes. “She’s right, Peter. Stay here. We can make do. You shouldn’t go outside anyway. It’s not safe.”
I looked out the window. I didn’t even see our morning squirrels tightrope walking on the phone lines.
“Do we have milk and chocolate powder?” I asked.
“No but—”
“Katie needs her chocolate milk, don’t you?”
Katie considered it for a moment, then nodded. Chocolate milk was a life necessity in her eyes. And she wasn’t aware of what was really going on outside. But she was smart enough to read our vibes, and they weren’t good.
“See.” I said. “There’s no choice. Make a list and I’ll make a run to Hannaford’s.”
Sighing, Candy said, “I don’t like this at all.” Whispering, she added, “I’m scared, Peter. I thought I heard someone screaming before. What’s happening?”
I bent close to her face so our noses were touching. “I don’t know, honey. But this may be our last chance to get the stuff we need for a while. We may need to hole up in the basement when I get back, ride things out until help comes. Bring whatever you can downstairs, including extra batteries and the radio.”
We flinched when we heard the crunch of metal echoing outside. I looked but couldn’t see the crash. Candy grabbed my hand, her own trembling.
“Please, stay. What if there are people in the supermarket that are sick?”
“I’ll keep to myself. Go on, make that list. I gotta get changed. After this, we circle the wagons, okay?”
She reluctantly went back to the kitchen, grabbing the magnetic pad off the fridge and a pen. I went upstairs and slipped on a new pair of jeans, black T-shirt, and baseball cap.
I had to get out of the house. Somehow, despite the growing madness, I knew no harm would come to me.
There was one stop I absolutely needed to make.