Two days later, Shelby stared at her phone through a watery veil of tears, willing the damn thing to ring, or even just chime with an “I’m still alive” text. But no. Nothing. Cooper was gone, and she was here, and…hell. Nothing was right about the whole damn thing.
She balled up a tissue and shot it toward the trash can, but missed. As she leaned down to pick it up, there was a gentle knock at the door, and for a moment, her pulse went berserk, thinking maybe he was back.
But when she looked up, Lexi’s cautious smile greeted her, rather than Cooper’s cheeky grin, and she felt her breath whoosh out of her lungs.
“Hey, Shelby. How are you doing?”
“I’m okay.” Shelby resisted the urge to check her eyes in the mirror, fearing they’d be just as red and swollen as they’d been for the past two days. “What’s up?”
“Just checking in. Haven’t seen you in a couple of days, so I thought somebody oughtta make sure you’re alive.”
“I am.” Shelby tried to smile. “All good.”
“Shelby?”
“Yeah?”
“You’re kind of a sucky liar. Not sure anyone’s ever told you that.”
This time Shelby did smile. “I’ve heard that before.”
“Can I come in?” Without waiting for an answer, Lexi opened the door and came through, then stopped in the middle of the kitchen. “Wow. You’re not even trying to be original here.”
“What does that mean?” Shelby couldn’t help but laugh a little.
“Tissues? Chocolate wrappers? A pizza box? Seriously?”
“That one’s not my fault. I found it on my porch last night. Somebody ding-dong-ditched me.”
Lexi lifted the cover of the box, scooping out a cold piece of cheese pizza. “We have only the nicest hooligans here at Whisper Creek.”
“True.”
Lexi leaned on the counter, biting into the pizza. “So how are you really doing?”
“Oh—you know.” Shelby shrugged. Nobody was even supposed to know she and Cooper had had a—thing. She couldn’t really start blubbering about lost loves here, even if there was nothing else in the world she could think about.
“Huh.” Lexi nodded, tipping her head. “Let me ask you something—are you under any delusions that anyone on this ranch doesn’t know about you and Cooper?”
“What?” Shelby felt her cheeks go immediately pink.
“You. Cooper. Love. Lust. The whole sordid thing.”
“I—wha—I don’t—what?”
Lexi laughed. “Did you two really think you’d kept this under wraps?”
“Um, I plead the Fifth?”
“Not a viable defense at Whisper Creek. Too many way-too-nosy people out here knowing everybody’s business.”
“Oh.” Shelby bit her cheek. What did they know, exactly?
“So…he’s gone?”
“Yeah.” Her voice was soft, pained.
“For—good?”
Shelby sighed. “I don’t know. He had to go back to Boston for—things. And he was pretty convinced that he needed to do it alone.”
“How do you feel about that?”
“Ha.” Shelby pointed at the table and counter. “Pretty sure I’m making that pathetically obvious.”
“Kind of, yes.” Lexi wrinkled her nose. “But it’s understandable. I get it.”
Shelby sat down on a kitchen stool, suddenly unsure her legs were going to hold her up for much longer. How in the world had Cooper gotten under her skin so thoroughly, so quickly, that she was suddenly so unmoored with him gone?
Lexi stood up, tossing her pizza crust in the trash, then headed to the sink to wash her hands. “How long do you have left here, Shelby?”
“A week.”
One miserable, lonely-again week.
Two days ago, she’d feared the days would fly by faster than she could possibly catch them. But she’d been on a love-struck high, the world was pink and unicorn-y, and triple rainbows had decorated the pure blue sky.
Okay, maybe that was an exaggeration of epic proportions. She was still desperately missing Daddy, she was in debt up to her eyeballs, and she was about to head back to a tour with more stops left than she could fathom.
But being with Cooper had helped every single one of those things fade to a muted gray version of itself. And now that he was gone, they were all poking at her with their sharp colors and their pointy edges and the dreaded hopelessness that went with them.
She had no idea how she was going to dig deep enough to find Tara Gibson in the mess that was her head right now—no idea how she could step on those stages, smile the fake smiles, and belt out the even faker music.
And there would be no Cooper to convince her that the future looked less bleak than the present.
Nic had called this morning to finalize their going-back-on-the-road plans, but had carefully avoided asking any personal questions this time. Shelby had a feeling her assistant was biting her nails, waiting for the day she could load Shelby on that bus and know that for the next six months her star would be surrounded by enough handlers that she couldn’t take a misstep, because there’d be no space to do so.
“Where does your tour start back up?” Lexi asked.
“Orlando. Disney. Happiest place on Earth.” Shelby made a face. “Because where else, right?”
“Yuck.”
“You know what’s killing me? Cooper and I were only together for a couple of weeks. Even Webster would have trouble qualifying it as any more than a casual fling.”
“Did it feel like a fling?”
“No.” Shelby took a deep breath. Of course it hadn’t. “No, it didn’t. But what do I know? It’s not like I have a lot of experience to go on here.”
“Really?” Lexi looked mystified. “But I thought—” She broke off when Shelby shook her head.
“No.”
“But I’ve read—”
“I know. It’s shocking how many men I’ve had, isn’t it?” Shelby rolled her eyes. “Except that the real number is something I can count on one hand.”
“Seriously?”
“Seriously.”
“I guess I just always thought—I mean, you’re surrounded by these guys all the time. Super-hot, rich—”
“Half of whom are complete jerks, I think I might have mentioned.”
“You did.” Lexi poured water for tea into their mugs. “And I may still never forgive you.”
“I couldn’t let you live under those delusions. He doesn’t deserve your adoration.”
“I’m sure I’ll get over him eventually. Or turn my laser focus to someone you didn’t destroy for me.”
“I’m sorry.” Shelby shrugged sadly. “Everybody knows real reality and media reality are two different things, but I don’t think most people have any idea just how different they are.”
Lexi nodded. “So let me test that theory. Ready?”
“No.”
“Your favorite designer is Vera Wang. Everyone knows that.”
“Nope. She’s lovely, and she makes gorgeous clothes.” Shelby pointed at her current outfit. “But Levi’s and a shirt from Target—that’s my reality. Nine days out of ten, when I’m not onstage, I’m in jeans or sweats, and I like them.”
“Okay, that’s just a practice question. You and Dylan Firebrand? After your last tour? Chalet in southern France?”
Shelby wrinkled her nose. “Gay.”
“Shut up.”
“True. And he actually doesn’t hide it, but since he hasn’t come out and made a capital-A announcement, the masses are still holding out hope.”
“Damn.”
“Sorry. Again.”
Lexi laughed. “You’re killing me. I had such jealousy over that story!”
“Then I’m helping! See?”
“So the demise of Brad and Angelina’s marriage? Not you?”
“Not me.” Shelby shook her head. “Or anyone else’s marriage, ever. One drink with a friend, plus one ambitious photographer, and bam! Story! It’s actually kind of amusing, when it isn’t slicing through you like a knife.”
“I imagine some of the wives don’t find it so amusing, when they see their husbands on front pages with you.”
“No.” Shelby made herself busy squeezing her tea bag against her spoon. “But only one of them ever threatened to have me deported, so I’m actually doing pretty well.”
“Deported? But—you’re from Tennessee.”
“Yeah. That particular guy hadn’t really chosen her for her geography skills.”
Lexi laughed again. “I can’t even imagine this universe.”
“You don’t want to, believe me.”
“And in a week, back you go.” Lexi shivered. “Are you…scared?”
“Deathly.”
The word came out before Shelby even knew it was in her head, and when her eyes snapped up to Lexi’s, she saw her own fear reflected in her—friend’s—face.
Friend.
“Do you need a tour nurse? I could come along, ride in your big ole bus, help with—whatever needs helping with.” Lexi fluttered her fingers. “You know, hot guys with fevers—that sort of thing?”
Shelby laughed, picturing the tiny nurse from Maine mixed in with the Hollywood types she’d be traveling with for the next six months. It would be so nice to have her grounded sanity along. So, so nice.
“You’re hired.”
Lexi’s smile faltered. “What?”
“I said you’re hired. We leave in a week.”
“Oh. Um.” Her hand went to her throat. “I was just—Gunnar wouldn’t—um…”
Shelby laughed. “I’m kidding. I’d never drag you away from paradise and into my sordid traveling circus.”
“Oh.” Lexi sobered. “But part of me wishes I was the kind of woman who could just say, ‘Hey, Gunnar! I’m off to see the world. Be back in six months!’ ”
“You’re not, and that’s perfectly awesome. I wish I could say, ‘Hey, Gunnar! Put me on a horse with enough water to keep me alive for the next six months, and send me off into the wilds until nobody remembers who Tara Gibson was.’ ”
“I wish you could, too.”
“Yeah, well.” Shelby sipped her tea. “Reality dictates otherwise.”
“Reality would be better with Cooper in it.” Lexi nodded sagely.
“Ya think?”
Lexi shook her head and sat back in her chair, closing her eyes. “I googled him after he left.”
“You did?”
“Couldn’t help it.”
“You could have started with that when you came in, you know.”
“I know.” Lexi shrugged. “I think part of me hoped you’d tell me. And the other part hoped you wouldn’t.”
“Because?”
“Because if you didn’t, then I’d know I was right about the two of you.” Lexi sighed. “And I was. Obviously.”
Shelby took a catchy breath. “I just can’t believe the case is being reopened. But he won’t let me help. I could…help. I could.”
“I’m sure, but I imagine there isn’t much that man has left besides his pride right now.”
Shelby nodded. True.
“You know—I don’t think this is forever, Shelby. I really don’t. Once this case is closed for good, I have a feeling there’s going to be a cowboy on the first flight to wherever you are by then.”
“Maybe.”
“She says, like she doesn’t believe a word I just uttered.” Lexi raised her eyebrows.
“I like what you said, but no, I’m not sure I can get to the part about believing it just yet. He’s pretty convinced that if anyone ever attached our names to each other, it would ruin me.”
Shelby waited for Lexi to argue vehemently…or at all, but instead, she tipped her head thoughtfully.
“Unfortunately, he could be right.”
“That’s not really what I was hoping to hear, thanks.”
Lexi set down her mug. “I know. But I’m not big on false hope, as optimistic as I try to be. It’s a big case, Shelby. A hideous, heinous crime. Crimes. Even though he’s innocent—and let me just be very clear that I know he is—those crimes are forevermore tied to his name. And if his name becomes tied to your name…we both know how it could go down.”
“I know. End of my career, my family’s name sullied, blah, blah, blah. I know.” Shelby sighed. “I’ve been over it a thousand times for the past forty-eight hours.”
“So what are you going to do? Because I don’t know you very well, but I have a strong feeling you’re not going to just head out of here next week, resume your life as Tara Gibson, and be able to forget the man who rocked your world this summer.”
“I wish I could.”
“You can’t.”
“I know.” Shelby drained her glass. “But here’s what I did figure out, somewhere around two o’clock this morning. I can go back out on the road as Tara, finish out this tour, and then I can be done. I can take off the wigs and glitter and I can head back to Nashville and find Shelby again.”
“And…Cooper?”
“God willing—yes.” Shelby nodded. “I know he needs to do this alone. I get it, as much as I hate it. But I’m trying desperately hard to have faith in the system here. I can’t believe the case would go back to trial, and I’ll never believe they could possibly convict him of a crime he didn’t commit.”
She took a deep, fortifying breath. “And so, six months from now, he’ll be cleared, I’ll be just Shelby Quinn, invisible has-been, and maybe we could pick up where we left off. Maybe—if we both want it badly enough—we could figure it out then.”
“That’s an extremely measured and mature outlook, for someone who’s only two days out from kissing somebody goodbye.”
“I’m totally faking it. Don’t be too impressed.” Shelby shook her head. “And really, I’m just saying words out loud, in hopes something—or somebody—will keep me from driving to the airport right now.”
Lexi looked at her for a long, uncomfortable moment, then shook her head as she stood up. “I just wish he wasn’t right, Shelby. I really, really wish he wasn’t right.”
“Me, too.”
“But do you know what I just realized?”
“I should head to the airport, reason be damned?”
“No.” Lexi walked across the living area and picked up Daddy’s guitar. “I realized that heartbreak makes for the best music, right?”
“I’m not going to capitalize on Cooper’s hell to write a new song, Lex.”
“No.” Lexi handed her the guitar. “You’re going to capitalize on your own. You probably have a whole new album stored up right in that little head of yours.”
Shelby was silent, staring out the window at the muted hubbub of the Whisper Creek stables downhill from her cabin. Then she let her eyes travel to the opposite window, where Cooper’s cabin stood, empty. He hadn’t even left the stupid chair.
Lexi tapped the guitar. “Write it down, Shelby. If you can’t help him right now…maybe—maybe you can at least help you.”