Aidan drums his fingers on the bar trying to make a decision. It isn’t just because he’s tired that he should avoid alcohol. He shouldn’t be in a pub. He doesn’t want to arrive home stinking of beer, with clouded judgement and loose lips. He has to remain clear-headed. He eyes up the bottles of Becks Blue in the fridge, the Heineken Zero, but nudged by the awkward conversation that awaits him, can’t resist ordering a pint of the guest ale – Just the Job – as well as a glass of house white. He carries them over to the table and places them down, licks a splash of beer from the back of his hand.
He slides into the seat next to her and raises his glass before realizing there is nothing to celebrate, and lowers it again.
‘So…’ He’s awkward. Unsure.
Melissa sips her drink, places it down on a crumpled Guinness mat, before immediately picking it up and taking a slug this time. ‘You wanted to talk?’ She meets Aidan’s eyes. Hers are bloodshot, red-rimmed with sadness.
‘Yeah…’ He wipes his frothy moustache. The ale is going down too quickly. ‘But how are you first?’ Aidan should care. He does care, but what he really wants to discuss is Lucy. He hears Mel speaking but he isn’t paying attention, his mind on his own marriage, his own family, not hers. He inhales deeply and breathes out his selfishness. Places his hand over hers and focuses on what she is saying.
‘It’s not looking like Fergus is going to come back. I’ve no idea where he’s living. Ryan is… God knows. They don’t talk a lot at that age, do they? He seems okay one minute but angry the next but then teenagers often are. Fergus has really distanced himself from everyone.’ Aidan knows that. His messages to his friend have remained unopened. He squeezes her hand, encouraging her to go on. ‘I don’t know how Ryan will cope if his dad meets someone new, has kids.’ She isn’t crying, although she’s close to tears. ‘Not that I can see him with anyone else but… My mind is constantly full of what-ifs. I don’t suppose he’s been in touch with you?’ Mel asks.
Aidan shakes his head. ‘He hasn’t, Sorry. Try not to worry. He’ll be in touch when he’s ready.’
‘Do you really think so?’
‘I do. Yes.’ Aidan can’t let on to Mel just how worried he is about his friend, she already looks like she has the weight of the world on her shoulders. ‘Has he turned up for work, do you know?’ he asks casually as though he hadn’t rung the airline to try to find out.
‘I’m pretty sure he has or they’d have rung the landline to find out where he was. It’s not like he has an office I could ring and ask to speak to him or turn up at. Goodness knows where and when he’s supposed to be flying.’ She chews her nail. ‘Everything is such a mess. Everything.’ She pauses. ‘Not just with Fergus either. I can’t believe Mr Marshall went back this year, can you? He hasn’t said anything to Ryan yet but he’s worried. I’m worried.’
‘Us too. Lucy persuaded Connor to finish his exams but if we’d known that Mr Marshall would still be the head we’d have let Connor transfer to another sixth form. It must be hard on the boys seeing him but also hard for him seeing them. Can you imagine the gossip he’s subjected to amongst the staff? I wouldn’t want to go into that environment every day.’ He takes another sip of his drink. ‘That’s what I wanted to talk to you about today. Gossip.’ He fiddles with a beer mat. ‘Lucy.’ However insistent his wife is that she’s left her post solely because of Kieron, he doesn’t believe her. ‘I wish she hadn’t been so hasty handing in her notice at the hospital after the school trip. Kieron is… well he’s not great at the moment but Mr Peters says he’ll pick up again. God knows how Lucy will occupy her time once he goes back to school. She’s… well she’s not behaving rationally. She’s become so obsessive over Kieron and I know it’s partly because of… well, you know. But also because she’s let her career go.’
‘I don’t know what to say,’ Mel says, her eyes pooled with sympathy. ‘I’ll give her a call later, see if I can get her to open up.’
‘I’d appreciate that. She’s so fixated on Kieron. She doesn’t talk to me, not properly. I’ve no idea what she’s thinking half the time. You know how she fell apart after…’ He can’t bring himself to say it but Mel is their oldest friend. She knows. She takes his hand. Gives it a reassuring squeeze.
‘What happened then is not going to happen now. Don’t take her not opening up to you personally. We all have our secrets, don’t we?’ Her eyes don’t meet his. Instead, she drains her drink.
‘Another?’ she asks.
Aidan turns his phone over to check the time. He’s had nine missed calls from Lucy.
There’s a tightening in his stomach. Something must be wrong.
‘I’ve got to go.’ He hurriedly pecks Mel on the cheek and jogs out of the pub before she’s even said goodbye, unlocking his mobile in his hand. His notifications shoved aside by a text.
Don’t ignore me or you’ll regret it.
Followed by another message, this time a photo.
The back of three boys.
Connor, Ryan and Tyler.
A message follows:
Remember this isn’t the only interesting thing I have saved on my phone…
He waits for something else but it doesn’t come. But the implications are clear.
Someone is going to get hurt.
He needs to make sure it isn’t his son.