Acknowledgments

The working title of my memoir was Family Matters: Stories to Invite You Home. I considered this title out of a longing for connection with my family of origin. I thank my late mother, Peggy, and my father, David, who I grow closer to with every year, for giving me this one, amazing life. Six years of intensive inner exploration while writing my life story forged deeper bonds with my family and enabled me to finish my book; but not without help from many. First and foremost I want to thank my siblings—David, Abby, Neva, Peggy, and Richard—for supporting my growth, being willing to grow yourselves, and for sharing yourselves candidly. Special thanks to you, Neva, for giving me the first glimmer of belonging, when you brought the six of us together for my fiftieth birthday. Thank you, David, for always being there for me, and thank you, Abby, for teaching me that it’s never too late to grow close. Thank you, Peggy, for encouraging all of us to do the work, and for loving me even when I was annoying. And Richard, thank you for being my wise teacher. It feels good to be at home with all of you.

I used to think I had to do everything by myself. I would never have started writing this book had I known how many people would be required to bring it to completion. First I needed a coach, then an editor, then readers, advisers, friends, and family. The list kept growing until I surrendered to the adage “It takes a village to raise a child.” I am grateful to Karen Thorkilsen for helping me get started, and for teaching me it’s okay for a writer to have a messy desk. (Creativity is a messy business!) Thank you, Lynne Blackman, for making sense of my mess. Your countless hours as my longest-standing editor (with Vernon as your backup) were invaluable. I appreciate your teaching me everything from structuring stories to digging deep, and even showing me where to put the commas, those little pauses that we all need. Thank you for friendship and occasional mothering, like I wished I’d had. Thank you, AB, for introducing me to Lynne, and for helping me find the connections I longed for as I discovered my core. Thank you, Jim Levine, of Levine Greenberg Agency, for your vision, tenacity, and quiet confidence, seeing the possibilities in my book when many others had turned it down. Your idea for the title helped make it universal. Thank you for finding David Rosenthal at Blue Rider Press, who gave me Sarah Hochman, my alchemist of an editor. Sarah, you helped me dredge order from chaos, and your belief in me as a weaver of words as well as people and yarns brought me farther than I ever dreamed. I also owe a debt of gratitude to Michele Hiltzig of the Rockefeller Archives, for finding priceless images on a dime, and to Patrick Groenewoud, who organized my father’s photographs so well he could find what I needed. Special thanks to Nikki Fitzcharles and Tausha Sylver, for their invaluable support in completing myriad details.

Throughout my six years of writing I depended on the ears of numerous friends who listened to me read my stories. To all who were at Paul’s and my thirtieth wedding anniversary, know that I appreciate each one of you. And special thanks to my sister-in-law Sue Cohn Rockefeller, who found multiple audiences for me and was unwavering in her support. Additionally, I extend deepest gratitude to my dear friend, Rachel Naomi Remen, M.D., for sharing her wisdom and support and giving me the first quote to promote my book; and to Holly Duane, my fellow adventurer and closest companion since first grade, for being there with a warm shawl or a giant handkerchief throughout; and to my dear friend and neighbor Ginny Rowland, who helped support me in many ways, including the cover photo shoot taken with sensitivity and skill by another cherished friend and photographer, Bob Eddy. They all joined my focus group, along with Diane and Sol Pelavin (who gave me my first written feedback) and my cousins, Cindy Franklin, Mary Louise Pierson, and Mary Morgan (who shared a room with me for a week at the Vermont Studio Center while writing her own memoir), Rebecca Reynolds and Henry Weil, Chez Winter, Kate Gridley and John Barstow (who gave early advice regarding publishers), and Kathy Wonson Eddy, who’s help was equal to her husband Bob’s in bringing me blessings of love and support. I am also grateful to the Blue Mountain Center, for letting me write for a week in my old room when it belonged to my late friend, Harold Hochschild. I also want to thank my late mentor, Norman Cousins, who first believed in my ability as a writer, and the late educator and role model, Walter Clark, who gave me hope.

Finally, I come to my nuclear family. Adam and Danny, without you I would not have written some of my favorite stories. You have enriched my life beyond measure. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for being teachers of honesty and accountability. And Paul, your belief in me and your encouragement every inch of the way has kept me going, even when I wanted to give up. I owe most of what I know about love, marriage, and partnership to you. Thank you for enthusiastically sharing my passion for nature, the pursuit of emotional intelligence and personal growth, for leading family dinners together when the boys were growing up, and for bringing sacred ritual into our family. These seeds, more than anything else we’ve done as parents, have helped transmit our values. May the love we have together, and as a family, bear fruit beyond our site.