JACKSON STOOD FROZEN in place as Natasha ran away … again. His first instinct was to run after her. Comfort her. But how could he comfort someone whose pain he had caused? A huge block of regret formed in his chest. Again and again, it seemed like no matter what he did, nothing turned out right, leaving him feeling like a failure. And his plans always seemed to upset the girl he loved even more in the process.
When she had kissed him, he was so sure taking her skydiving had been the right move. The feel of her against him. The scent of her. His whole body missed all of her. Yet seeing the hurt on her face when she realized what she had done shattered him into a million pieces. Was he being selfish continuing to pursue her?
She had kissed him. Chalk it up to the adrenaline, blinding her from reality for a second. But the instant her lips touched his, she claimed him. Showed him that beneath all that anger and pain, she still had feelings for him. The confusion he felt was now magnified tenfold.
A hand on his shoulder broke him out of his daze. He gave Lambert a sidelong glance. The dive instructor was also looking in the direction Natasha had gone.
“Tough break, man,” Lambert said.
Jackson sighed. “I’ll make sure she returns the harness in case she actually drives off with it.”
“For sure I thought you’d gotten her back when she kissed you,” the dive instructor continued, stuck on the topic Jackson had tried to steer them away from.
“I thought so too,” Jackson said, giving in. Then he packed up all the emotions into a small box inside him to think about later and faced Lambert fully. “Thanks anyway for letting me do this. I know I’m still a few dives short of officially leading a tandem dive.”
“Consider it the first and last favor I do for you.”
Jackson shook Lambert’s hand, trying not to feel like he’d done all that for nothing.
* * *
Jackson was at a stoplight when his phone rang. He eased the bike to the side of the road to give the car behind him space to go and turned off the engine as he answered the call. Not bothering to check caller ID, he removed his helmet and brought the phone to his ear.
“Yeah,” he said in a dejected tone.
“What the fuck is wrong with you?”
Caleb shouted so loudly from the other end of the call that Jackson had to pull the receiver away. But the angry words didn’t stop there.
“My cousin is with her brother right now, bawling her eyes out! What the hell happened?”
Dropping his head, Jackson ran his fingers through his hair as he said, “Meet me at the Lucky Duck in half an hour. You can continue screaming at me there.”
The call went dead the second Jackson finished speaking. Heart like a lead ball in his chest, he slipped his phone back in his jeans pocket and kick-started his motorcycle.
* * *
The Lucky Duck was their favorite Chinese place. The restaurant sat right at the edge of downtown and was usually empty in the afternoons. Jackson knew the owner and apologized in advance for the ruckus he was sure Caleb was about to make.
Five minutes after Jackson was given their usual corner booth, Caleb strode in like he owned the place. He didn’t have to search for Jackson; he knew where his friend would be, since they all ate at the same table whenever they craved Chinese. All of them—Caleb, the twins, Preston, and Jackson—had practically grown up at the Lucky Duck.
Without waiting for an invite, Caleb slid into the booth across from where Jackson sat and said, “When I agreed to help you with this skydiving stunt of yours, I thought I was on the side of love. Natasha had been sad without you. That’s crystal clear. So I thought, why not help the guy out? He won’t hurt her.”
“I never planned on hurting her,” Jackson said, already on the defensive. The words tasted foul in his mouth. He was man enough to admit when he’d messed up. But he wasn’t going to sit there and just take it. “Not when I left. Not when I came back. Not when I set out getting her to forgive me.”
“Well, that’s just peachy, isn’t it?” Caleb poked the table with his index finger so hard that if it was full of cutlery, they might have been clattering. “Now I have someone who I consider my sister hurt because of this stunt. I should never have gone through with this.”
“Don’t you think I feel the same way right now?”
“Bullshit. Hindsight is twenty-twenty.”
Jackson leaned back, his shoulders falling. “I really messed up.”
“Understatement of the century, pal.”
“No.” He lifted his gaze while keeping his head bowed. “I mean, I really hurt Tash. Like really bad, didn’t I?”
“Einstein, that’s what I’ve been saying from the beginning. What part of ‘complete mess’ didn’t you understand when we talked before?”
Jackson stared at his hands on the table. “I thought I was fixing things.” He covered his face with both hands, attempting to rub away the sadness that was spreading like wildfire inside him. “It’s like no matter what I do, I’m just making more of a mess. I’m such an asshole.”
“You got that right,” Caleb said, but with less heat.
“What am I going to do?” Jackson asked, but to no one in particular.
Caleb raised a hand. In seconds a server was by his side. He ordered the dim sum platter and a pot of oolong tea.
Straightening in his seat, Jackson studied Caleb. “What are you doing?”
“When I called you,” his friend began, “I was honestly ready to bury you in the woods where no one was ever going to find you.”
“At this point? I might even let you.”
“But as shocking as this might be, I’m actually really impressed that you’re going the distance for Tash.”
“I never stopped loving her, man,” Jackson said truthfully.
“Have you ever considered just leaving?”
Almost immediately, Jackson shook his head. “Not going to happen. I meant it when I told her I was here to stay.”
“I figured.” Caleb picked up one of the ceramic cups filled with hot tea that the server had left. “So what are you going to do now?”
Jackson picked up his own cup and let the heat from the ceramic seep into his skin. It settled the confusion inside of him enough that he could think clearly.
“It looks like grand gestures aren’t working,” he said, staring at the clear amber liquid with steam rising from the top.
“What tipped you off?”
Usually, he would have bitten Caleb’s head off for his sarcasm, but Jackson knew quite well that he deserved it. He went through all the options in his head. There weren’t very many left. Until he reached the most obvious conclusion.
He brought the cup to his mouth and took a bracing swallow of the hot tea. “It’s time to call in the big guns.”
Caleb’s eyes grew wide. “Are you thinking what I think you’re thinking?”
Jackson wasn’t sure what his friend meant, so he said, “I’m going to bite the bullet and ask the help of the one person who knows Natasha better than anyone else.”
“I was afraid you’d say that.” Caleb shook his head in admiration. “You’ve got a brass pair on you if you think Nathan will be willing to help after your latest stunt.”
The wince was unstoppable. Jackson knew what he was facing. The wrath of Nathan Parker was legendary. He was nice to everyone until you give him a reason not to be. And Jackson had screwed up big-time.
“It’s a long shot,” he said, feigning confidence when really he was scared shitless. Caleb didn’t have to know that.
“Maybe Tash just doesn’t believe yet that you’re here to stay,” Caleb said in passing as the server returned with a huge tray filled with a dozen bamboo containers.
Jackson was taken aback by the words. Holy hell, how could he have missed the most obvious thing? Of course Natasha would doubt his sincerity. He’d never given her reason to believe otherwise.
With renewed determination, he picked up a pair of chopsticks and brought a spring roll to his mouth. He swallowed first before speaking.
“This meal’s on me.”
“Wouldn’t have it any other way.” Caleb grinned.