Chapter Six: You Do? I Don’t
1. I gotta fess up. It did not go down like this … exactly. This story is a mash-up of all the fucked-up weddings I’ve been to. I’m sorry, but if I wanted to have any friends left in the world, I had to do it like this. I needed to come clean because the last thing I want is to end up across from Oprah being called a fraud and my career over. I LOVE Oprah. I do NOT LOVE weddings. That is a fact.