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"Amanda, define downhill for me, because I think those men have a different understanding of the word," Sady said as she dropped onto a large rock, exhausted.
"I think the word we're going for is lost," Amanda replied as she sat next to Sady.
"I wonder how long before they send out a search party," Sady asked.
"Unless you're dead I don't think they bother," Amanda responded. "How in the world do they expect us to work on a case when we're being tortured? I demand hazard pay for this one. CJ said the trail was marked. With what? Broken branches, rocks? Because that's all I'm seeing!"
"Shh! Listen," Sady whispered. "Do you hear that?"
"The call of the great outdoors? That's been screaming and taunting me since we rolled into this hillbilly hell hole. And the call of nature? That's becoming urgent!"
"No, I hear someone... or something," Sady insisted. They listened carefully and heard the sound of footsteps and snapping twigs.
"It's a rescue party," Amanda said, jumping up. She began yelling, "Hey, we're over here!" She waved her arms and Sady joined her.
From her vantage point, Sady had a better view. "It's Melody," she told Amanda, grabbing her arm in excitement. She recognized the blonde ponytail and camp clothes. "Melody!" she yelled. "Over here!" She and Amanda sent a group of startled birds into the air with the commotion they made.
Sady watched as Melody hesitated for a second, then took off running... in the opposite direction of the lost women. She plopped down onto the rock, stunned. "She left us here."
"Well, I have no intention of moving another inch, let alone another mile," Amanda said angrily. "This place is a lawsuit waiting to happen, and if someone doesn't arrive with mobile transportation and something edible soon, it's gonna happen!"
"Would you settle for something edible?" Harry asked, scaring them both. He and CJ carried backpacks and communication devices. CJ alerted the other searchers the women had been found, and they could return to camp.
"What happened to you?" CJ demanded.
Harry, being more sensitive than his rough edged wife, tried to get her attention and back her off the hard-nosed inquisition.
"Do you need food or water?" Harry asked, interrupting CJ who was about to start in again.
"Both," Amanda snapped. "But not from a bag in the middle of the wilderness."
"Or when we're covered with sweat and dirt," Sady added.
"You got one of those fold up mopeds in there, Handsome?" Amanda asked Harry while both women ignored CJ. "Because these feet aren't walking another step."
Harry looked helplessly at CJ, and Amanda snorted, "Well, which one of you is gonna carry me?"
CJ gave a huff of disappointment. "The camp is just over that ridge," she said.
Amanda put her hand above her eyes and scoped the ridge. "Oh, yeah. Sady, how did we miss that? It's right next to the giant neon arrow that says THIS WAY TO CAMP!"
Sady turned and asked, "What happened to the markers?"
"What markers?" CJ asked, puzzled.
"The ones you told us about as we got ready to hike back. As I recall you said, 'Just follow the signs and you'll be back at the camp in no time'," Sady said.
"Ladies, can't you follow a path or footprints?" CJ asked. "This is a training camp! There are no trail markers! Use your eyes and your senses."
"Uh, CJ..." Harry saw the looks and tried to warn his wife, but it was too late.
"You're wrong about signs," Amanda snapped. "Read this!" She flipped her finger and stomped toward camp. Sady followed, nearly as mad as Amanda. At the edge of camp the others came running to check on them. Matt reached for Sady, and she shoved him in the chest.
"Thank God you're back," Melody said. "We've all been so worried."
"There better be hot water and something besides a bar of Lava soap," Amanda growled. “Otherwise there’s gonna be another eruption!”
"And it had better not be a community shower," Sady added. "I'm surprised this place doesn't have a three seat latrine!"
"Sassafras?" Matt asked, looking worried. It wasn't like Sady to be so angry, and he didn't understand what upset her.
She flipped around. "Why don't you and Harry enjoy supper from his bag? I'm sure he'll be glad to share with his bunk buddy!" She turned on her heel and left Matt staring with his mouth open.
"Uh, oh," Harry murmured. "That didn't sound good. We need to have a conference with Wallie," he suggested. "I'll get CJ."
"Good luck," Matt replied as CJ barked orders and terrorized the camp.
While the Knight's and Matt had a conference with Wallie, Sady and Amanda took showers. Aaron came through with a muscle relief cream, and the Army guys offered their apologies outside bunkhouse five. "Sorry, ladies. We didn't think the little woman with the big mouth would actually leave you out there all alone."
"I could use a drink," Amanda said.
"Make it a double," Sady agreed. "Did anything survive when you dropped your bag of booze?" she asked Amanda.
"Yeah... the bag," Amanda replied sounding disappointed.
"Hey," Chuck whispered. "We can sneak into town for a beer. It's not far."
Amanda snorted. "These feet don't walk one step for a beer! Do they serve real alcohol?"
Robbie said, "They have a fully stocked bar. That's the only way anyone survives this place."
"I hope the little Nazi woman doesn't catch on," Tom added. "You won't say anything to her, will you?"
"Oh, I promise- not a word," Amanda said with a gleam in her eye. Sady nodded in agreement. She was still mad at being left out in the middle of nowhere with only Amanda as a partner. Everyone at Knight Investigations knew how Sady and Amanda felt about camping and this was worse than camping. Sady felt she and Amanda were entitled to their anger and a few drinks.
"Hey, I thought this place was covered with surveillance cameras," Sady said to the Army guys.
They chuckled. "It is. You just need to know how to circumvent them."
"Which is?" Sady prodded.
The guys looked at each other and smiled. "Part of the reason we come every year is so we can beat Wallie at his own game. He made our life hell in the Army as our C.O., so now it's payback time. We get assigned to different bunks each year, and we've figured out the exact spots a person can sneak out to avoid detection."
"You're kidding!" Sady looked astonished.
"Army intelligence at work," Robbie said. "Of course we may have tweaked the angle on one or two cameras by a slight margin, but not enough for them to notice."
"Well, what are we waiting for?" Amanda demanded.
"We wait until it's lights out, and dark outside," Chuck advised. "Besides, you should really eat something since you missed supper. If you go to the mess hall, I'm sure they'll let you eat."
"What did they serve for supper?" Amanda asked.
"Rehydrated freeze-dried chicken and vegetables," Tom replied. He laughed at the look on Amanda's face. "You bought the 'we provide everything you need sales pitch,' didn't you?"
"Does that bar serve anything other than liquid sustenance?" Amanda asked.
"As long as you don't mind it being deep fried," Robbie warned.
"Hell, I'm about to bust the front gate of this place in a stolen jeep to drive there," Amanda threatened. "Somebody better have a bag of unhealthy snacks to tide me over or I can't be held responsible for my actions!"
One of the guys left and returned with a bag of potato chips under his shirt. "No one's watching," he assured them. "I feel violated," he joked when the women eagerly hustled the chips from his shirt.
"Come get us when it's time to party," Amanda mumbled, her mouth stuffed full of potato chips.
Sady grabbed the bag and hopped after Amanda to their bunk to wait until it was time to leave. She and Amanda lay on the hard slabs that passed for bunks, sharing the chips when someone knocked on the door.
"Don't come in," Sady yelled.
"I'm on the commode and the curtain's broke," Amanda added with a snicker.
They heard Matt ask Harry in a low voice, "How does a curtain break?" Harry must have shrugged because they didn't hear him respond.
Instead, he said through the door, "We just wanted to make sure you two are okay,"
"Why wouldn't we be?" Sady asked sarcastically. "Deprivation and neglect is really improving our mood. Make sure you tell the Nazis that."
"Sady?" Matt called.
"You're one of the Nazis and, therefore, responsible for that little death march we barely survived," Amanda responded. "Now go away before I sue you for violating my right to privacy."
Apparently they thought Amanda really was on the commode because the women heard footsteps running from the bunkhouse. They did a high five and then shared more chips. They left the lights off, so when it grew dark there was no need for CJ to remind them. A half hour later their door opened, and Tom motioned them to follow him.
"Stay directly behind me," he whispered. They walked a slight zig-zag path around a few bunks, then disappeared into the brush. At the fence, one of the men simply held it up, and they scooted under. Sady raised her brows at Amanda. So much for camp security!
"No Aaron?" Sady asked the Army buddies.
"We don't trust him not to tell," Robbie admitted. "Aaron's a nice guy, but he likes attention and isn't always discreet."
When they entered the bar, Sady nudged one of the Army guys. "So much for discreet," she laughed. Aaron sat at the bar hitting on a pretty woman. A bear sized man on her other side stood, and Aaron moved to a different stool. He waved when he saw them, but they didn't join him. If he continued to antagonize the biggest guys in the bar, they didn't want to be involved.
Sady and Amanda found a booth, then ordered a mountain of deep-fried food. Amanda went straight for the hard booze while Sady stayed with beer. Amanda could drink the Army guys under the table if she wanted, but Sady didn't have that tolerance, and she had no desire to be dragged back to camp, puking and flopped over someone's shoulder like a rag doll.
Sady nudged Amanda and nodded to the door. "Well, look who else just entered." It was Melody, and she was no stranger to the place. Several people, including the bartender, shouted out greetings. Even Aaron waved to her.
When she spotted the camp group, she hurried over. "I see you found the key to survival," she said in a friendly voice. Then she put a hand on the arm of each woman and said, "I'm so glad you're okay. I'm starting to wonder about the safety of the camp. I can't believe they left two women out in the wilderness like that."
Amanda opened her mouth to share her thoughts on being left in the wilderness when Sady shook her head. Amanda drained her glass with a glare, but remained quiet. Sady changed the subject to the camp program and what they could expect. Melody thought about it for a minute and said, "I don’t recall but I know we still have practice on the shooting range, and a 24 hour survival outing."
Amanda spoke up then. "Hell and no to the survival outing. Sady and I already did that! But the shooting range? That sounds fun."
"Oh, it is," Melody assured them. "Of course we practice with the real thing, but there's also a paintball range where we play war games. That's fun!"
"I love those earrings," Sady told her. It was true. The diamond studs were gorgeous and to Sady's trained eye, expensive. "I bet you don't wear those out on the shooting range. You sure don't want to lose one of them!"
Melody bit her lip and shook her head. "They were a gift from Seth. Excuse me!" She rushed off, leaving them surprised at her sudden departure. Aaron interrupted her escape, and she pushed around him in her haste to leave. He sat down with a dejected look, then hit on the waitress.
From the next booth Chuck shook his head. "She's one crazy, mixed-up woman. She can't decide whether to laugh or cry over Seth's death. Maybe she's bi-polar."
"Could be," Sady said as she narrowed her eyes and thought about Melody's strange behavior. Maybe she'd been out walking and crying when she and Amanda called out to her when they were lost. That might explain why she'd run instead of coming to help them. But if she knew they were lost- and she did- why didn't she at least wave and offer to send help? That was puzzling.
When the evening wrapped up, everyone felt a little better about returning to camp. Even Aaron was quiet on the return trip. Sady felt a little guilty about ditching Matt, but then again, he ditched her that morning, right? She yawned and decided to figure it out later. All she wanted now was sleep. Preferably not the board Wallie considered a bed, but there was no other choice. She and Amanda said goodnight to their drinking buddies at the edge of camp, the followed Chuck as he crab walked them back to their bunkhouse.
Sady cringed as the door squeaked when they opened it. Then she realized, other than the mystery guest bunkers, Matt, and Harry, all the campers had been at the bar. Nothing to worry about, right? Wrong. She and Amanda covered their eyes at the bright beam of light that nearly blinded them.
"Well, well. Look who's back. Did you have a nice trip?" Matt asked sarcastically.
"If you don't move that flashlight, you'll be using it as an appendage," Amanda threatened. The light moved slightly, and the women could see Matt wasn't alone. Harry sat in the other chair, and he didn't appear happy.
"Are you crazy?" Harry asked. "Sneaking out of camp? We're here to do a job, not explore the town's nightlife."
Had it been daylight, Harry would have seen that remark was a mistake.
"We've already explored the whole damn camp, including the wildlife," Amanda thundered in a warning tone. "We've been humiliated, abandoned, starved, ignored, and left in the wilderness. Tonight's extracurricular activity was simply a means to restore our spirits and good nature. No, it was a necessity. So no harm, no foul. Unless you'd like to explain why you two are not in your bunks. Because I carry a rape whistle now," she threatened. "I'm not getting lost in this God-forsaken place again!"
"Really? You're going with that too?" Matt asked Sady.
"I'll add that we were working the case as well, if you're going to be so suspicious," she said in a frosty voice.
"With the Army guys?" Matt asked in disbelief.
"Don't be stupid," Sady snapped. "They just provided the means of escape from this demented piece of land, otherwise known as purgatory. We enjoyed the real world for a while and made a discovery. But with that attitude we aren't sharing!"
"Oh, no," Harry said. "We're a team, and this is a team effort."
"Is that what we're calling it now?" Sady asked. "Because I don't recall any team effort on your part earlier, when you were needed. The blisters on my hands and feet agree."
"Fine, so we'll split up tomorrow," Harry said. "Will that make you happy?"
Amanda snorted with laughter. "Too late. We already agreed to team up with the Army men. You two boys have fun playing together."
Harry sighed. "We're way off track. Sady, Amanda- we apologize for leaving you on your own, especially since this isn't the sort of place where you feel at home."
"Thank you, Harry," Sady said.
"You're a gentleman," Amanda added, then mumbled, "Not like others I could mention."
Matt exploded. "Are we going to worry about etiquette or the fact that it's common knowledge the campers can come and go as they please? So much for Wallie's high-tech security. Since you two followed your Army buddy, I assume he and his pals know how to get out undetected. That moves them to the top of my suspect list. Especially since they aren't big fans of Wallie."
"We already knew that," Sady told him with a sniff. "They told us all about it earlier. They come here to make mischief for Wallie. If they wanted to put him out of business, all they would have to do is leak word about the less than stellar security."
"She's right," Harry said. "CJ ran their backgrounds, and they're pretty straight up guys."
"Oh." Matt turned to the women. "And how many times did they hit on you?"
Sady stood. "Zero, Matthew Meadows. What kind of women do you take us for? They've been nothing but helpful." Sady's temper was dangerously near to boiling over, so Harry kicked him out.
Over Matt's protest, he said, "You're not helping! Now get out of here before I call CJ and report you out of your bunk."
"Doesn't that work two ways?" Matt responded.
"Nope. Not when you're married to the woman in charge. We already made arrangements to break the rules," Harry smiled.
"Oh, God, now I've heard too much! Figure it out before morning, please. And Sassafras? We aren't done by a long shot." Matt didn't care that the door slammed on his way out.
"Finally!" Harry exclaimed. "Remind me to never take on a job like this again."
"Oh, you won't need a reminder," Sady assured him.
"You'll be on your own if you do," Amanda added. "Well, you and the little terrorist woman."
"Okay, ladies, let's hear the details of your adventures. How did you get out of camp undetected?"
The women explained it to Harry, then Sady added her suspicions about Melody. "Something's not right there, Harry. When we were lost I know she saw us, yet she took off running when we called for help."
Harry frowned. "She was supposed to be on one of the search teams. That doesn't make sense."
"Another thing that doesn't make sense. Why did she bring an expensive pair of diamond stud earrings to a place like this? She couldn't have expected to show them off at a society function. So why bring them and risk loss or theft?"
"I don't recall the earrings," Harry told Sady.
"That's because she didn't wear them on the course, but I saw them at the bar. Of course, she'd changed clothes. But those things sparkle like crazy. I swear I saw them glittering when we were lost. She turned her head briefly, and the sun caught one just right. At first I didn't think anything of it, but after seeing them tonight I'm sure she had them on, along with her camp clothes. But she wasn't wearing the earrings when we got back to camp. Is anyone else thinking what I'm thinking?"
"Twins?" Harry asked. "But why? What's the point? If they had Seth killed why hang around? Or should I say why would Melody hang around? She's already been cleared."
Sady shrugged. “If Melody’s twin was in camp while she was out wandering then I understand why she ran from us. She couldn’t lead us back to camp or everyone would know her game.
Amanda pointed at the door. "Boss, you get to fill in the little marshal!"
Harry smiled as he stood. "You will be happy to know that we held a conference after you got lost, and we agreed that you won't have to go on the 24 hour survival outing."
"Gee, thanks," Sady said. "We were so looking forward to eating bugs and fresh tree bark, instead of from a package that has to be reconstituted."
Amanda mumbled under her breath, "Was there really any question?" Then she grinned at Harry and asked, "And you cleared this with the big boss? How did you manage that?"
"Let's just say Matt and I used our powers of persuasion and prevailed."
"You threatened to leave, didn't you?" Amanda prodded.
Harry's eyes bugged. "Are you crazy? She'd kill me before that happened. But Matt threatened to pull out in support of your safety, and I'm capable of a little arm twisting when necessary."
Sady gave him a hug. "Thank you, Harry! Now if you could manage to get us real mattresses we'd be your devoted slaves for life."
He laughed on his way out the door, and Amanda yelled, "We're not kidding."
"I know!" came the disappointing reply.
Sady looked at the bunk and said, "Amanda, we didn't drink near enough booze!"
"Amen, Sister Sady!"