I was on a plane with my longtime collaborator and friend, Wayne Kirkpatrick, when it happened. It all started when I played him a new song, “Missing Person,” which I was planning to include on an upcoming album. It was more than just a musical moment. Soon enough, the message behind the tune had us both feeling convicted. As we zoomed along, 30,000 feet up in the air, talking about the intense passion we used to have for God, I couldn’t help but get a little depressed. What happened to that fire that I had been so sure was unquenchable? Before long, though, I was past feeling depressed and had moved on to feeling determined. I wanted to get that fire back.
Throughout my career, God has used me to sing songs that have helped fan those flames in young hearts and rekindle a spiritual passion in Christians who find their faith stuck in neutral. But those messages aren’t just for music fans, they’re for me as well. And this one was coming through loud and clear. It wasn’t as if I had turned my back on God or anything like that. In fact, if you ran into me on the street or attended one of my concerts, you probably wouldn’t have a clue. But it’s hard to be a Christian for years and never find that early enthusiasm dimming just a bit. I wasn’t the only one to experience it, either. The message of the song hit home with Wayne and many of the other people I played it for as well. It seemed like it was a pretty common problem.
YIELD
Has there ever been a time when you felt your faith fading a bit? What else was going on in your life at the time? What were your priorities?
Complex Problem, Simple Solution
Fortunately, there’s a pretty simple solution. There are steps we can take to get that fire of faith burning bright again in our lives. In fact, there are a lot of ways to turn around that all-important relationship with Jesus, but it usually starts with simply abiding in Him, in other words, following where He leads.
Sounds easy enough, but it’s where a lot of us get off track. As we cruise along in our daily lives, regular demands begin to crowd in and take up time that should be God’s. Between school, friends, church, sports, family, hobbies, TV, and video games, it’s easy to have little left over. Soon enough, He’s lost in the shuffle. That’s why it’s important to make a point to set aside time to spend with God. You might feel silly penciling the Creator of the universe into your calendar, but you do no less for other important activities, don’t you?
What do I mean? Well, if you’re on the soccer team at school, you have to show up for each practice and go through various drills and exercises to help you improve. You can’t just talk about playing soccer and put pictures on your wall of world-class players and expect to get better. It’s only through regular interaction and effort that you grow as a team and develop the necessary skills.
In the same way, you can’t just wear a Christian T-shirt or put a fish sticker on your locker and think that alone will bring you closer to God. That’s all outward stuff (and it’s fine with me), but God wants to be a part of what’s going on inside, too—in your heart. The other important relationships in your life all require time and attention, and, in that way, this relationship is no different.
YIELD
How do you currently go about connecting with God? Do you set aside time regularly to spend with Him—reading, praying, or worshiping on your own? If not, how can you begin to incorporate that into your daily schedule? Who can you find to hold you accountable to doing that or help you in learning how to make it part of your everyday life?
So once you’ve made time in your schedule, where do you go from there? With friends, you can talk on the phone, hang out, even go see a movie, but you can’t very well take God to the local multiplex. That doesn’t mean you can’t spend time with Him in different ways. Reading the Bible and praying are great opportunities to connect with God. Sure, they seem obvious, but then how come they’re so easy to overlook?
The Heart of Worship
One of the best places I’ve personally rediscovered that fire is in times of vertical worship. I almost hate to use the term vertical worship because it’s been so overused, but it’s become a personal crusade of mine to help people understand that worship is about much more than music. When I lead worship, I get a lot of compliments on the sound and on the songs, but that’s just the beginning. Worship is a lifestyle. As for the word vertical, don’t let that throw you either. It simply means up and down, or in this case, between God and you. It’s not about who’s in the pew next to you or what your best friend is doing or what happened in homeroom this morning. It’s about you and God connecting. Sometimes it happens to me at the most unexpected times.
About three months ago at New River Fellowship, a young church plant I helped start, I walked in, and this guy was playing piano, and it was communion Sunday—and I just fell apart. All I could do was cry the whole service. I sat there on the front row and wept. I couldn’t even pull it together to do the announcements, something I was scheduled to handle that morning. Instead, I got up, and I cried. One of our pastors, Rafael, had to come up and grab the announcements. I couldn’t do it. And no, I wasn’t having some sort of breakdown. I hadn’t had a fight with my wife or lost my recording deal or found out a friend or family member was sick or hurt. It was just this brokenness of realizing all over again how much I need God. For some reason, on that particular morning, I tapped into that truth and found myself saying, “Hey, God, I’m desperate for You. I really am.”
Now, just because I can point to spiritual moments in my life like that one, it doesn’t mean I’m perfect, and I don’t always live out that reality perfectly either. Sometimes I get distracted. But the important thing is that I realize that. I don’t make excuses. I get back on track. And God looks beyond my good intentions and my mistakes. He looks inside and knows my heart, which can be reassuring because I strive to have a heart like King David. I may make mistakes, but deep down inside I really do desire to be a strong man of God. That’s the good news. The bad news is, I don’t always want to do the right thing. Sometimes the alternative seems much more appealing. But I know the consequences of sin. I know that I’m loved and that I have a purpose. I’m reminded of that during intimate encounters like the one I had at New River Fellowship or those I have with God any time of the day or night. And those moments change me and give me the courage and strength to do what I know is right.
If you spend time with God on a consistent basis, you’ll find you start to change, too. As a result, you’ll become less concerned about what you want to do and getting your own way. What you want will become closer to what God wants. Trust me, it’s hard to get too off track when you’re that in tune. And once you find that missing person inside of you, from there, you start looking outward. That’s when I find myself asking, “How can I help someone? How can I pour my life into someone?” That’s when you really start to become who God wants you to be: a servant.
That’s where, in the last few years, I’ve found the greatest contentment. As I’ve tapped into taking care of others, the things I once thought were important have become much less so. Having a #1 song or a platinum CD or winning awards doesn’t bring you peace. I won’t lie and tell you it doesn’t feel great, but it’s nothing compared with being a part of changing someone’s life. That’s why what really gets me excited is when I visit Nashville’s Rocketown club for teens and see kids who need to hear about God show up for concerts or coffee or to hang out in our skate park. It’s the same emotion that wells up in me when I see another child sponsored through Compassion International, a Christian relief organization I’ve been involved with for years. Or sometimes it’s as simple as pouring my life into a little kid at church who’s not very well loved. Try it, and I guarantee that you’ll start to experience some real joy in your life.
YIELD
What dreams or accomplishments are you chasing that you think will make your life complete? Are those aspirations in line with God’s goals for you? Are you getting excited about the things that excite God?
Missing in Action
Unfortunately, some people never take the opportunity to turn things around. They think there will be time to get their spiritual life back on track later. Right now, they just want to have fun. There was a time in my life when I made my share of bad decisions and thought I’d have plenty of time later to put God first. In my mind, I still have painful memories of almost dying one night from a drug overdose; of playing an after-hours bar that I knew didn’t fit with who God was calling me to be. These quick glimpses, like some sort of mental Polaroids, sometimes have me asking, “What if?” It’s frightening to think what could have happened if I hadn’t gone searching for that missing person that was me and found a gracious God waiting to welcome me back.
But how did a good, small-town, West Virginia boy get to that point in the first place? Pride may have been part of it. I thought I had it all figured out. This is something I’m much more watchful about now, and with good reason. In the music business, it can be hard to stay humble when there is no shortage of people waiting to tell you what you want to hear. It’s a common practice at concerts for fans to line up afterward to shower the artist with praise, seeking autographs and sharing personal stories. While it’s always nice to receive a compliment or know your hard work and talent is appreciated, if I don’t watch it, I can start to believe the hype. That’s why I need to have people who know me well and whose opinion I trust to keep me in check.
Selfishness can also play a role. Sometimes when you’re young, you can be pretty self-centered, even out of good motives. You get out of high school, and you’re consumed with trying to figure out what life is all about. It’s all part of growing up, but you still need to be on the lookout. If I could go back and talk to my teenage self, I think I would tell him, “Don’t forget the lonely; don’t forget the poor; don’t forget the less fortunate. They’re all around you, but it’s so easy to get so consumed with what you’re doing that you don’t even see them.” I’ve always had a heart for reaching out to people, but in order to move from intentions to action everyone needs some direction and discipline, something you don’t always make a point to seek out when you’re young and anxious to try your wings.
Looking back on those days, I really wish I had more mentors in my life to guide me through that important time. I really could have used a group of men to mentor me during my younger years, people who would have held me accountable. I was a bit too much of a free bird. Like me, you may not think you need it right now, but I would encourage everyone to actively seek out this sort of relationship. Accountability isn’t a luxury in the Christian life. Everyone needs to have spiritual mentors who can help guide you along the paths they’ve already walked and good friends who can help steer you back on course when you begin to veer off in the wrong direction. It’s also important to stay plugged in at church so the leaders there can hold you accountable. I didn’t have enough of those relationships in the early days, and that’s why, for four difficult and trying years, I was a mess. All because I didn’t raise the standard, I didn’t raise the bar, and I didn’t surround myself with other godly men who would encourage me to do that. I thought I could do it on my own and that it would all be okay.
YIELD
In what areas do you struggle most? Who can you get to hold you accountable in those areas? What measures can you take to help you avoid temptation in the future?
Even during that difficult time, though, there were still signs of God’s love and care for me. The most important ones were my parents. Throughout my life, Mom and Dad have been two of my greatest examples. While I grew up in a Christian home, they didn’t preach at me much. Sure, they got on me a little bit (they are parents, after all!), but mostly they taught by example. I watched my mom and dad love each other, and I watched how they treated everyone they came in contact with.
If you have a strong Christian family behind you, as I did, don’t take it for granted. It’s a gift not everyone has been given. If you don’t have it, don’t feel like that support is beyond your reach. Seek out strong Christians who can be good examples for you.
Preventative measures are great. Mentors, good friends who will hold you accountable, and a strong local church that you’re involved in will go a long way toward keeping you on the right track. But it’s also important to remember that if you do make a mistake, don’t let it keep you from trying again. We serve a forgiving God who literally died to give you a second chance. All you have to do is ask. After all, we’re all becomers. None of us has arrived.