Do you think God has a sense of humor? I know He does. Just take a look at the platypus or the anteater and then try to convince me otherwise. Some people would like us to believe that we should only talk about God in hushed tones and that there’s no place for humor or fun within the confines of Christianity.
I agree that religion is no laughing matter, and when we speak of God, the Creator of this vast and wonderful universe, it should be with awe and reverence. But I don’t believe we need to be serious all the time to show our devotion. Sometimes this world is downright goofy, and it would be silly of us to pretend it wasn’t.
Personally, I love to laugh. It lifts my spirits. It makes me feel better. It takes my mind off other weightier stuff. And why wouldn’t it? It says right there in Proverbs 17:22 that “a cheerful heart is good medicine.” Life can be difficult enough sometimes without feeling like we have to be serious every single minute, and laughter can certainly lighten the load. Even the writer of Ecclesiastes knew that, saying in chapter 3 of that book that “there is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven . . . a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance.”
YIELD
Why do you think God made us with a sense of humor? Why is it important to be able to laugh? Are you someone who is able to laugh at yourself? When was the last time you laughed?
Did you see it there on the list? “A time to laugh.” It’s even biblical! Everything has its place, and laughter has a large place in my life. It even has a place in my music. I’ve written my share of songs about life’s more serious moments, and I sing them regularly, thankful for the impact God allows them to have in the lives and hearts of those who hear them. But I also believe Christian musicians can have a sense of humor. I was certainly going for the lighter side of life when I recorded “Love Me Good,” another song I wrote with Wayne. You can’t sing a song with lines in it about Mongolian barbecue, the Brady Bunch, and Genghis Khan and expect it to be taken too seriously.
Give it a listen, and you know that this tune was meant to be fun. It’s one of those songs that’s just quirky, and I love perform-looking it live. And I can’t find a single thing wrong with that. Why does everything have to be so serious all the time? Why can’t we just lighten up?
Of course, not everyone shares my sense of humor. There are a lot of people who love that song and others who just don’t like it or don’t get it. Even though it was a #1 hit on Christian radio and I was invited to open up the Dove Awards with the song that year, according to the Gospel Music Association’s definition, “Love Me Good” didn’t meet their criteria for what constitutes a “Christian” song. That meant we could perform it at the awards ceremony to entertain the crowd, but it couldn’t actually be nominated for an award. That’s just one more strange and funny twist in the story of this not-so-serious song.
While I believe “Love Me Good” was an appropriate use of humor, there are times when it’s just not right to try to be funny. Like the verse in Ecclesiastes says, “There is a time for everything.” We’ve all been in youth group or a class at school when someone was using humor to get attention or distract from what someone else was saying. In that case, it’s disruptive and annoying. It can even be downright rude. Some people also enjoy getting a laugh at someone else’s expense. That kind of behavior may get you the attention you were seeking, for a moment at least, but it will also get you branded as someone who’s willing to hurt others for his own gain. That kind of label isn’t going to win you any true friends in the long run.
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What do you personally find funny that maybe others don’t? Have there been times when you used humor when it wasn’t appropriate? Did someone get hurt? How did you feel afterward?
MORE THAN MEETS THE EYE
Whatever other people’s opinions are about “Love Me Good,” I enjoy the song, just singing some of those crazy lines. More importantly, I know that hidden within that happy-go-lucky tune is a message we all really need to hear.
It’s no big secret that we all want to be loved. More than that, we need to be loved. We’re programmed for it. There’s even research to prove it. Studies have shown that when babies aren’t held, cuddled, or shown affection in their first weeks or months of life, they can suffer not just psychological but actual physical consequences. It can affect their ability to gain weight and their development. In the most extreme cases, they can fail to thrive. And while we may outgrow many things from our younger years—from cribs to clothes to our need to sleep with the light on—we never outgrow our need to be loved.
Knowing we need love and asking for it are two different things. You’re not going to walk up to someone and start singing “Love Me Good.” Sometimes it can be hard, though, to admit the thing our heart wants most. Love is a difficult thing to ask for. What if we get rejected?
The reason we may have such a hard time expecting love from those around us is that we struggle with whether or not we deserve to be loved in the first place—especially the way God loves us, with His unconditional love. Unfortunately, the way we’re loved in this world isn’t always a great reflection of God’s kind of no-matter-what love. That’s where it gets confusing.
I personally wrestled with my own worthiness when I was younger because there was a lot of legalism in the church I grew up in. While the Bible was filled with talk about love and forgiveness, it was pretty evident that in this congregation if you did certain things, you were automatically on the blacklist. As a result, the message came through loud and clear: you’d better watch your step. That type of rigid atmosphere takes its toll. For me, it meant I never really knew about unconditional love until I was in my late teens. It was then that I had a sort of spiritual reawakening, and I rededicated my life.
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Have you ever wondered why God bothers to love you? Have you ever doubted that He could really love someone like you as much as the Bible says He does? What effects do you think that has on your faith? On your ability to trust God with every area of your life?
ACCEPTING THE GIFT
Not that my struggle to believe God loves me no matter what was over from that day forward. It’s an ongoing battle, one that the devil hopes we lose. I think that is the enemy’s main purpose: he sets out to discourage us, using our weakness to make us feel unworthy. So we continue to beat ourselves up. We know the truth, but it’s amazing how we can still be sucked in, how he can make us start to wonder, Why would God ever love someone like me?
You may feel that way in your heart, but don’t forget what you know in your head. The Bible is clear: God loves each of us because we are His. We were created in His image, and He’s written His name on each of our hearts. There’s nothing you have to do to earn that love, and there’s nothing you can do to make Him love you more—or less. Even if you were the only person on earth, He still would have sent His Son to die for you alone. You’re that important to Him! It can be a bit overwhelming to hear those things, but it’s true. God really does love you that much. No matter what you’ve done, what you’ve thought about doing, what you might do in the future, He loves you.
The message does eventually sink in for most of us. I can honestly say that I think I really, really know better today than ever before the true, unconditional love of God. And that one thing makes all the difference in my life. I sleep better. I’m at peace. I’m happy. There’s a lot of joy in my life. I feel like I’m more productive.
While those benefits are great, it’s not just about me. Refusing to accept God’s gift of unconditional love takes its toll on those around you. If you say you’re a believer but you don’t believe God loves you the way the Bible promises He does, it colors everything you do. You can’t give as much, you can’t do as much, until you really come to terms with this. Now that I have, I think I extend more mercy. I feel like I’m more forgiving. And that affects those around me in a positive way. All the things that you hope to be start to rise to the top. That kind of amazing love, when you really, truly get it, makes you want to love others the same way.
YIELD
When you think about God’s unconditional love for you, what do feel? Happy? Grateful? Unworthy? Which of those emotions do you think are from God? How do you want others to feel when you give them a gift? Now how do you think God wants you to feel about the gift He’s given you?
GETTING AND GIVING
You may have already guessed that “Love Me Good” isn’t as much about God’s love for us as it is about how we’re supposed to love others—and how we’re not. The Bible is pretty clear about how we’re to treat those around us. We’re literally commanded in Leviticus 19:18 to “love your neighbor as yourself.” And in the New Testament, love is mentioned again and again. The most famous passage is probably 1 Corinthians 13, which tells us in detail just exactly what love is.
In case you need a reminder, patient and kind make the list, while proud, rude, easily angered, and self-seeking are held up as examples of what love isn’t. We’re also told that love “always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.”
That’s a tall order to fill. Are you up to the challenge? Well, some Bible teachers say you can boil down what God wants from us into one simple sentence: Love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, and soul, and love your neighbor as yourself. (Mark 12:30–31)
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How do you define love? How do you show love to your family and friends? Does it fit the description given in 1 Corinthians 13? Who are the “neighbors” in your life? Could they be the person who has a locker next to yours, the student in that desk one row over, the kid on the bus who gets off at your stop? Are you loving them?
GIVING LOVE A BAD NAME
“Love Me Good” is also aimed at those who are currently loving others badly. It’s a message directed at that person who feels the need to make everything into an issue. Or maybe it’s talking to someone who’s negative all the time. We all know someone like that and how that kind of attitude can spill over onto everyone around them. Or the song could be sung to that somebody who’s always dealing with something, who thrives on continually being in crisis mode. The song is a reminder that those people don’t have to always take life so seriously. There’s nothing wrong with having a good time.
Not everyone gets the message, and I feel sorry for those people who don’t. I see them all the time, and they’re miserable. Sometimes it’s something carried over from childhood. While I was raised in a positive, Christian home with a mom and dad who always loved me unconditionally, that’s not the case for everyone. I see so many young people in the church whose dad left when they were little or maybe their mom doesn’t really care about them and they are deeply affected by it. They can’t love other people well because they feel like they haven’t been loved well themselves.
I hurt for those people, but it can be hard for me to know how to help in these types of situations because these are issues I’m not familiar with. I didn’t grow up dealing with that. But it doesn’t mean I’m helpless. Instead, I’m careful to explain that while I can’t empathize or know exactly what they’re feeling, I can sympathize with them and provide a listening ear or a shoulder to cry on. I can also pray with them and bathe them in scriptures, praying specific verses just for them. I can be a friend, and in my own way I can “love them good.”
For all I know, you personally have a dark cloud that hangs over you because you have a skewed image of love. Maybe you’ve been hurt in the past by someone you trusted. It could be that a parent or relative, someone who was supposed to love you and care for you, dropped the ball and didn’t fulfill that responsibility.
I hate to hear those stories, and they really are tragic. But no matter how you’ve been loved (or not loved, as the case may be) on this earth, you can take comfort in the fact that we’re all loved equally well by God. While it can seem easier to wallow in your pain and rehash what you missed out on in the past, God wants you to focus on the future and the love you’re called to show to others.
We’ve been given the greatest gift imaginable, and we’re asked to pass a little of it on, to love others because He’s loved us. That shouldn’t be that hard to do, when you really think about it. After all, when you discover a great new ice cream flavor or exercise routine or clothing store, your excitement bubbles over and, before you know it, you’re telling everyone you know. How much more excited should you be, then, when you discover how much God really loves you? If you’re like me, you’ll be practically bursting with joy. And then the problem won’t be how to start loving others “good,” it will be that you won’t be able to stop.