Lynn Tilton is the founder and CEO of Patriarch Partners LLC, a holding company with investments in more than seventy-five companies across fourteen industry sectors. Ms. Tilton is passionate about saving American jobs by saving American companies. Since 2000, through affiliated investment funds, Tilton has had ownership in and restructured more than 240 companies with combined revenues in excess of $100 billion, representing more than 675,000 jobs. Tilton’s platform is the largest woman-owned business in the country.
Our journeys, as women of industry, technology, or service—are lonely and fraught with obstacles unknown to men. We face a choice and consequent juggling act indigenous to our sex—the election whether or not to bear children and, if so selected, the split-of-self required to rear our young without losing the propensity of trajectory to our career paths.
This unrivaled quest to “have it all,” to “excel at both,” or the unbearable compromise to “sacrifice one for the other” should bind us and unite us in the awe and appreciation of modern womanhood. But instead, few of us find the support system, the sponsors, or the advocates to drive us forward when the darkness envelops us and the battles overwhelm us.
It need not be this way. It should not be lonely, but the path lively with the laughter and love of female friendship. I have often stated in speech and written word that our destinies, as women, will change when we begin by being kind to each other. We can then expect men to take their cue from us. But rather than blame exogenous forces or the male population, we should begin with that which we can control: our own behaviors. Madeline Albright is well-known for her myriad achievements and her celebrated statement, the often-repeated but little practiced, “there is a special place in hell for women who are unkind to women.” If this is, indeed, so, then there will be far too many of us in this reserved station. Why do we compete with and cannibalize each other rather than support and promote? Why do we little understand that we are 52 percent of the population and we need not be rivals for a few token places at the top of our profession, but rather, together, we can open access to many more doors?
We live in a country where we can embrace every liberty, gain admission to every institution of higher education, and find entry into every professional field. We, as women, graduate at the top of our classes in undergraduate, legal, business, STEM, and medical educations. And yet, when we look to the top echelons of our respective fields, so few of us sit at the top. This truth must give us pause, force self-reflection, and make us ask: “Why?”
When does our natural predilection to compete against, cannibalize, or deprecate each other begin? What is the invisible force that separates us, rather than binds us, as we grow from young girls and students into womanhood? Are we inculcated to believe that there is only one man for every woman, that a soul mate must be unearthed and protected, and that we must contend like gladiators in the coliseum to war for the prize? Are we unable to relinquish that battle mentality of all is fair in love and war when we enter arenas apart from the heart?
If for no other reason than to honor those unable to embrace freedoms of rights, education, and career, we must consciously connect in their name; we must put envy and competition in its proper place. In messages sent to me, two dear friends, devoted to women less fortunate, reminded me that the liberties that fuel our infinite potential are not accessible to all our global sisters. In Iran, women battle bravely to reclaim the freedoms granted when Shah Pahlavi desegregated the genders in his modernization of democratic Iran. In a campaign called My Stealthy Freedom, courageous women work to retake, by might, these freedoms lost in the Islamic revolution. They long for the power and support of a global sisterhood, a concept that seems unlikely to me until we find power and poetry in force on our western shores.
Of one inalienable truth I am certain: together, standing shoulder to shoulder, women are the greatest force of nature. I also know that when we cease to dilute our power in the name of politics, religion, and male attention, we will be introduced to the best version of collective self. The Dalai Lama has opined that women will be the salvation of the world in the communal power of their compassion. And compassion is contagious.
I struggle to find the voice or the tool that can convince us that we can be strengthened in force by the power of our passion, the depth of our creativity, and the concentration of our collective compassion. I know I have found my harshest critics in other women. Press articles most deeply critical of my style of appearance and leadership were written by women. The harshest of legal scrutiny has been initiated by women. Do we somehow think that we score extra points if we hurt one of our own? It is not that those in their professions should not be critical of women if it is so deserved. However, it seems most often that women, in their quest for approval and career advancement, often find force in preying on their own, as if they are in some way weaker and easier game in the hunt.
As a single mother at twenty-three, I have known the fear of being lost in the darkness, the uncertainty of finding my way into the light. There were many days when I was just unsure I could survive the burden to keep my daughter safe and my job secure. We are all shaped by our experiences and our reactions to our tragedies, and triumphs profile who we will become. I know I want the journey to be easier for my daughter and her daughters. I appreciate also that I must not just utter this prayer of hope, but I must be a crusader of change and an example of the expectation I establish.
I have built a business where each day I attempt to prove that making money and making the world a better place are not mutually exclusive goals. I do this by buying companies that others have left to liquidate and by seeking to rebuild, rejuvenate, and reinvent. By doing so, I hope to protect those working at these businesses from the indignity of returning home to their families without work.
As technology advances with exponential speed and jobs are replaced by automation, artificial intelligence, and robotics, I strive to bridge technology with humanity and manufacturing with innovation. All things begin with product—design and disruption—and I struggle to dream, design, build, and create the 360 experiences with sufficient speed to keep these companies, many centennial and iconic, relevant and alive.
My dream is to end the plague of joblessness. But my new hope is to inspire women to unearth their collective strength, deeply rooted in female creativity and compassion, so that we might find a way to unite on our journeys. We can be smart, sexy, and sophisticated and still rule the world.
Perhaps this evolution must start with young girls before they grow jaded. I have reintroduced an old cosmetic brand—Jane Cosmetics—for younger women, where for every cosmetic item that is purchased, the company gives one to a shelter for battered women in your community—“buy one, give one to a neighbor in need.” It is my confidence that through this company we can help teach a younger generation of women that compassion is contagious and that kindness can be the new cool. I have dedicated my efforts and my companies’ sponsorship to support Dean Kamen in his FIRST robotics competition in order to attract a larger populace of girls by making certain they never feel the need to choose between brains and beauty. I am in the process of posting the X Prize that I have designed and funded, which will offer an extra $5 million to any winning X Prize team that boasts a female CEO and women in half its leadership roles. Perhaps the size of the prize will inspire the drafting of brilliant women to the technology teams advancing solutions to the world’s largest problems.
I hope that one day soon I can call upon the women I know, and those I hope to know, so that we might select an audacious and measurable goal, where efforts, by women for women, will be set and achieved. I remain convinced that we will unite in thought and action when we can prove to each other that our power lies in numbers, and quantify the improvement in our lives that is demonstrated when we stand in support and show kindness to each other. Let us be each other’s cheerleader, friend, and the invisible web of energetic elegance that transcends dream to reality and drives our reach for the stars.