WHO ARE YOU?

Ryan C. Thomas

As I get older, I find my memory is as reliable as a pothead friend who says he’ll help you move a couch. My lapses are worse when the heat waves arrive, such as they had been lately. So it shouldn’t have registered with me that the woman behind me in line at the grocery, with her gray-streaked oily hair and schoolmarm olive green dress, was the same exact person who'd stood behind me in line at the bank yesterday.

Strangely enough, two days later, as I was coming home from the gardening store where I had purchased some sprinkler parts for my home irrigation system, I saw her again. She was walking by the small duck pond near the on-ramp to the interstate. She wore the same green dress. She carried no purse. Her hair shined like a wet towel, impervious to any wind or humidity. A few oily strands hung sadly down her back, like running paint on a wet canvas. I noticed the way her arms barely moved as she walked, as if they’d been stapled to her ribs. There was something almost waxen about her. If it got any hotter out I thought she might just melt into a puddle right there in the street.

She glanced over and caught me staring, and perhaps out of embarrassment broadcast a half-hearted smile at me that revealed a parade of oversized horse teeth.

I drove by, watching her in my rearview mirror, noting the way she kept her eyes on me as I put distance between us. “Stop following me,” I muttered. “And Mom said I’d never grow up to be popular.” I laughed at my own lame joke because I am a sad, lonely soul—my brother’s words, not mine.

At home, I turned on the news and chewed my own tongue while watching a report about politicians trying to solve crime rates in inner cities around the country. They splashed the usual statistics onto the screen, as if they meant anything. Crime was up, always up, never stopping. I thanked my stars I lived in a good neighborhood. Besides a solitary incident in which a teenager stole my neighbor’s car a few years back—joy riding, he told the police—we had not had any criminal activity in a long time.

A couple days later, when the marine layer had rolled in and dropped the temperature to something tolerable, I went out into the backyard and fixed the sprinkler system with the PVC I’d acquired. I dug down around the lines and saw that the gophers had come back. They always flourished when the heat rose. I talked down their tunnels: “Stop coming into my yard, assholes.”

I swear one of them responded: “It was our land first, you dick.”

I thrust the hose down there and tried to drown the bastard out, but after several minutes of wasting water I gave up and went back inside the house.

***

Over lunch that same day, I saw a man walk in front of my house. He wore a dark brown suit and a fedora, which I found peculiar since his young age seemed inappropriate for such anachronistic dress. Perhaps in his twenties, though he sported the kyphotic frame of an elderly woman. Bent forward, stiff arms by his sides, walking with a forced smile. I figured him for a religious missionary of some sort, and watched him move down the road until he was lost in the heat wave. He did not leave any pamphlets in mailboxes or knock on doors.

I should have forgotten about him, especially in the blistering heat which lasted all through the next week, but I saw him again at the donut shop on Sunday morning. I proffered a cordial, “Hey,” as I got in line behind him. He tipped his hat to me and smiled. A wide, crooked smile that seemed to wrap around his head like a crack expanding in a sheet of glass. And inside that smile, a row of pearly white, massive horse teeth.

Christ, I thought, those teeth . . . it’s like some disease going around.

I saw him again several times over the next couple of days. At the grocery store, at the Home Depot, at the high school football game on Friday night. He sat one row in front of the woman in the green dress. They remained statuesque throughout the game, neither cheering, nor booing, nor checking their phones like the other people in the stands.

My house was just three blocks up past the high school parking lot, so Friday night games helped pass the time these days. I’d tried online dating, but aside from two dates to get coffee, nobody seemed to want me. My brother, who called me once a week, told me, “It’ll happen when it happens. Don’t rush it, Tim. Remember how I met Jillian?”

“At the doctor’s office.” I’d heard the story so many damn times I wanted to reach through the phone and punch him.

“At the doctors. She has gout. I have gout. So I said, ‘Would you like to gout with me sometime?” He chuckled like a moron.

“That’s really . . . a dumb joke.” I hung up on him.

It was almost nine o’clock when the game ended and I was wiping sweat off my forehead, wondering how high my electric bill was going to be with all the fans I had on at home, when both the man and woman stood and walked down the bleachers, onto the grass, and disappeared into the night. Neither of them moved their arms when they walked. It was weird. Why didn’t anyone else seem to notice it?

Surely it had to seem weird to others?

As the concession trucks rolled away, and the players ventured into the stands to see their friends, I decided to head home. That’s when I noticed the little girl sitting by her father. She was maybe nine or ten, wearing a pink and yellow dress, a white bow in her hair, and she studied the high school crowd like she was observing salamanders in a terrarium. There was little to no emotion in her face, which was neither here nor there. Except, it felt off. She wasn’t bored, or tired, or anxious to leave, or confused, or content. She was blank. Her father looked back and caught me staring, and I quickly looked away, but not before I saw he was wearing a T-shirt that read Vista Police Athletic League Softball.

He was a cop.

I waited a full minute before looking again, at which point the girl’s father asked if she was ready to leave.

She nodded. Smiled. She had the giant teeth. I swear I was seeing those teeth everywhere.

“Who are you people?” I whispered into the night.

***

I saw her a few days later, at a bookstore where I’d ordered the latest mystery by some author my brother had gotten me hooked on. She was standing in the Young Adult section, looking at the spines of the books. Not reading the spines, mind you, just staring through them, expressionless as a porcelain doll.

I looked around for her father, but did not see him. It was just as well, since I’d be hard pressed to explain to him why I, a fifty-six year old man, was eyeballing a kid.

Did I mention she wore the same pink and yellow dress? She did. She walked down the aisles without moving her arms. Did kids do that? I didn’t know. Eventually a worker asked me if I needed help finding a title and I had a momentary vision of bashing his brains in with a hammer. Way to ruin my stakeout, pal!

As I’d feared, the girl turned toward me, waiting to see what I’d say.

“No, just browsing,” I replied.

Her dead eyes gave me the heebie jeebies, so I left.

The very next day I was back at the bank to discuss a fraud charge on my debit card. My brother kept telling me I needed to take better precautions with my money. But screw him, it’s not like he was paying my mortgage, right?

“Just give me access to your account,” he’d say. “It’s hard doing it all by yourself. Believe me, I know. Jillian has to help me with a lot of our finances because I keep forgetting to set up our auto pay.”

“Get lost,” I always told him. As if I needed another greedy hand on my money.

The bank manager took me to one of the desks and we went over the charges that week. “That one,” I said, indicating a purchase in India. “Obviously I wasn’t in India four days ago.”

“So you didn’t spend $286 in Delhi?” She spoke to me like I was an idiot.

“Do I look like the type of guy who goes to Delhi?”

“Okay, we will flag that one and you should see the money reimbursed in a day or two. In the meantime I’ll need to get you a new temporary bank card. Just wait here.”

She left me alone at the desk. In walked the man in the brown suit and fedora. He stood in line for a few seconds, then looked around, saw me, and gave me his overzealous grin, just like that day in the donut shop. I smiled back, watching him, waiting for him to speak. He waited his turn and then reached the teller. He handed her a withdrawal slip. The teller read it, said, “Do you want that in twenties?”

The man nodded. When the teller asked how his day was going, he merely shrugged.

“Here is your card, Mr. Garmin. You should receive your permanent one in the mail in about a week. Is there anything else I can help you with?”

“Yeah, “I said, before I could help myself. “That man in the hat who just left. I think he lives in my neighborhood. I wanted to say hi but I don’t know his name. Do you?”

“I’m sorry, but I can’t give out anyone’s personal information. Perhaps if you just say hello when you see him next. Maybe you can catch him now if you hurry?”

I decided to take her advice and raced outside into the heat, but he was gone. The trees and flowers in the back parking lot were dead or dying from lack of water. I swear it looked like the clouds were melting. Would the sun ever turn off?

As I was driving home from the bank, I saw all three of them sitting on a bench at the local bus stop. The girl, in her pink and yellow dress, the man in his brown suit and fedora, and the stringy-haired woman in her green dress. They were looking at me as I drove by. The hairs on my neck stood up, though I couldn’t tell you why.

“What’re you all looking at?” I whispered, pulling my truck into the next side street. I did a three-point-turn in the closest driveway (okay it was more like a thirty-point-turn) and backtracked to the bus stop. The bus was pulling into traffic and the three people who had been on the bench were gone. I surmised they had gotten on the bus, and so I followed it for several blocks while it made stops, hoping one of them would get off. After an hour I realized it was getting late and I was going crazy—following a bus with people who had done nothing wrong other than look a little odd. It wasn’t a crime.

I shook my head like a wet dog. “Tim, you’re brain is melting like a scoop of ice cream shoved up a gorilla’s asshole. Go home and read your book in front of the fan. Get some sleep.”

And so I did.

***

I had one date the next month. I met her on a dating app my nephew urged me to try. The app was mostly full of young women looking for a casual hook up, which was fine by me, but of course none of those women wanted me. Couldn’t blame them either. I was overweight, balding, and still had a home phone. I was a geezer. But Miranda answered my chats asking if she’d like to go to a poetry reading downtown. I had noticed she had poetry as one of her interests, and so I quickly Googled around to see what was going on locally. There was a “Night of Spoken Word Wonder” going on at the library, and it said there would be cookies and coffee, so I figured, if nothing else, I would not go home on an empty stomach.

She responded and said she was planning on going to the event anyway, but that we could meet there and talk. Truth be told I would rather have my dick gnawed on by rats than go to a poetry reading, but I was tired of only talking to my house plants.

I got there early, and met Miranda near the door. She was my age, well dressed, and had fiery red hair, all of which seemed a plus to me. We made small talk for a few minutes, and I got her to laugh once or twice. She had a mouth like a pirate but I didn’t mind. Straightforward women turn me on.

The first reader droned on about wishing she was a lizard or some such nonsense, and both Miranda and I chuckled a bit behind our raised hands. The second reader told of growing up gay in the south. I felt bad for him, but his prose was shit so unfortunately, I didn’t care about his work. It was during the third reader, an older gentleman with a bad comb-over, that I noticed the woman in the green dress walk into the library. She made her way to the coffee and poured some into a Styrofoam cup. I watched her intently, ignoring the reading, even ignoring a couple of sotto voce comments Miranda made toward me. Why was she here, this woman? Was she following me? Why did she keep appearing in my life?

The woman in green never took a sip of the coffee. She looked at the ground for a moment, then lifted her head and stared at me. I felt a chill run down my spine.

I couldn’t sit still, not with her blank face locked on mine, so I excused myself from Miranda’s presence and made my way to the coffee. As I drew up next to the woman in green I could smell something earthen and cold in the air. I leaned closer to her. She smelled like mud. With a slow turn, she met my eyes. I felt my scrotum shrivel in fear, though I still couldn’t explain why. “I’m Tim,” I said. “Who are you?”

The woman in green said nothing, just smiled for a half second, revealing those giant teeth again.

“Are you . . . are you following me?” I asked her.

She slowly shook her head no, without breaking eye contact, put her cup of coffee back on the table and exited the building.

“Wait!” I yelled, racing after her. My voice apparently caused some stir with the reading, but I was out the front door before I heard what was said about me. The woman in green was already out on the street at yet another bus stop.

“Who are you? Why are you following me!”

She got on the bus and it drove off.

I felt a presence behind me, and when I turned around Miranda was there with her red hair swaying in the hot, spring night. “You okay?”

“I . . . that woman. She . . . ” I had no idea what to say.

“You interrupted that guy’s reading. Kinda douchy. Just saying.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to. It’s just . . . I keep seeing that woman. I’ve been trying to follow her but—”

“Follow her? If you’re so into her, why did you come on a date with me?”

“No, it’s not like that.”

“That’s what they all say.” She went back inside the library.

I apologized again after the reading was over, and she was pleasant enough, but I could tell I’d blown it. It didn’t matter, though, because the next day I saw on the news that Miranda had been killed in a car accident. Her head was crushed upon impact by the truck that hit her. The windshield was smeared with red and bits of white, and the news apologized for the grisly images, but I knew they were banking on it getting them viewers. The shot lingered long enough to see tufts of hair in the congealed bits of brain on the glass.

The driver of the truck, also a female, was also dead. She was being called an “unidentified citizen” due to the fact they had not yet recovered any ID. But when they showed the woman’s picture, all breath seemed to leave my body.

It was the woman in the green dress.

***

The Friday after I watched the news of Miranda, I decided to go to the football game at the high school, get my mind off things. The Beavers had made it into the playoffs, though they’d need a miracle to beat the Grizzlies, who were ranked number one in the county.

I bought a bag of chips and some sweet tea at the concession stand, and then sat at the top of the bleachers so I could see the whole field.

The Beavers were up by three at the end of the first quarter, when I saw the little girl in the pink and yellow dress. She was sitting with her dad down near the field. I watched her scanning the people sitting near her, watched the way she studied them, like they were alien to her. I noticed again her tiny frame, how thin she was and thought on how it was pretty trusting of her father to let her go and take the city bus alone like she did.

I gave a determined scan of the bleachers until I saw the man in the fedora. He was only three rows ahead of me, and he was doing his usual “stare into nothing” type glare. Occasionally he moved his head as if he was following the plays on the field, but I could tell he was not really watching the game.

At one point, he and the little girl exchanged eye contact, lingering on each other more than I liked. There were no expressions of recognition, but they didn’t turn away from each other either.

“The hell is going on?” I whispered. I wanted badly to find out why these freaks were in my neighborhood.

I moved down next to him, cleared my throat. “This seat taken?” I asked.

He turned his head but didn’t speak. He smiled a little, looked at the seat, and faced forward again.

When I was seated, I took a moment to collect my thoughts, and then said, “I saw you on my street not long ago. You live around here. My name’s Xavier. Xavier Garmin. And you are . . . ?”

He said nothing, left my hand shake hanging in mid air. Just then the whistle sounded and the game ended. People stood up like it was suddenly raining money from the sky. The man in the fedora gave me one more smile, then stood up and began walking down the bleachers. I had just a second to notice the little girl in the pink and yellow dress was also looking at him before I realized I was going to lose him in the crowd.

I stepped down the bleachers, pushing my way through the throng, until I hit the grass of the field. I caught sight of the man far out near the parking lot. Either he had sprinted when I lost sight of him, or he’d slipped through a time warp.

I raced after him, losing him as cars cut me off. I weaved around a couple of SUVs and a Mustang, thought I saw him at the edge of the lot near the street, but as I raced closer I saw it was just a high school kid in a surfer hat.

“Fuck.”

I headed back across the lot toward my house.

***

I was a block from home when I saw him again. He was down the side street about three houses, standing on the front porch. I turned and headed toward him, intent on finally getting his name and confirming he lived in the area. If he did, I was going to feel foolish, but that didn’t mean I was crazy, did it?

He opened the front door and stepped inside. I raced to catch him before he shut the door and locked it. But he never shut the door, just left it wide open. I jogged up the front walk and onto the porch, stuck my head in the front door.

“Hello?” I asked.

There was a thud from somewhere inside, followed by a series of grunts.

“Everyone okay?” I wouldn’t normally enter another person’s house, but it sounded like someone was hurt. I made sure to keep announcing myself so I wouldn’t startle him.

“Hello? It’s Tim. We met at the game. Are you okay?”

I heard more grunts, and groans, and a feeble yelp. When I got to the kitchen, I found an elderly man on the floor. His head had been bashed in with, what I could only assume was, the frying pan laying next to him. The wide gash over his right eye exposed a gleaming white skull and flaps of pink skin. Dark blood pooled beneath him. Next to this, the man in the Fedora was bent over a woman. She, too, was covered in blood. Her nightgown had been slashed and a gouge ran down between her elderly breasts. Blood ran out of the cut like someone had left the sink on. The man in the fedora was holding a butcher knife.

I stood frozen, my mouth quivering. “Oh my God,” I said.

I backpedaled a step and watched the man in the fedora stand up slowly. He took the butcher knife, which was covered in the woman’s blood, and jammed it into his own neck.

“Holy Christ!” I spat.

The man gurgled, spasmed, and fell to the floor where his feet twitched for a good minute. Then he stopped, and the only thing I could hear was the tick-tock of the antique grandfather clock in the hallway.

I realized then that I was standing at a murder scene, and everyone was dead except me. And I had no way at all to explain how and why I was in the house.

Shaking, confused, and terrified beyond words, I made my way back to the front entrance, stepped out into the cool night air, and did my absolute best to walk home without looking suspicious.

***

I stayed inside my house for the entire next week. I eventually saw the news of the murders on TV. The cops were ruling it a breaking-and-entering gone bad. The fingerprints on the murder weapons matched the man in the fedora, who, again, was being identified as an “unknown assailant” since he was not carrying any ID. The news was asking anyone who recognized the man to call the police.

So I did.

I told them I’d seen the man at the bank. I hung up quick. I did not want them to look into my own story further, having been in the house during the murder and all.

***

After many days, I couldn’t shake the thought of the little girl. She was stuck on my mind like dirty adhesive tape. And why shouldn’t she be, for she was also one of them. This much I knew for sure. At least I thought I did. There was no other explanation for her behavior.

I debated telling the police, but had no idea how to relay my theory. I had no evidence of a threat. I also couldn’t go to the police because her father was a police officer. (Maybe he was one of them too—though he did not walk the walk, nor were his teeth of any significant size.) One can’t just accuse a small child of being a murderer, especially when no murder has yet taken place. They’d lock me up and throw away the key. And yet I knew, without a doubt, that she was going to cause someone harm, or even death.

I knew I was going to have to take care of her myself before she killed whoever she’d chosen as a victim.

So I did what any good citizen would do. I tracked her down.

It wasn’t hard. I happened to see her father leaving the local Wendy’s one afternoon. I followed him to a house only six streets over from my own. He disappeared inside for several hours, then came out again to drive his police cruiser back to the station. To make sure it was his house and he wasn’t just sleeping with the home’s owner, I waited outside on two different nights until I saw him arrive home in his Jeep Cherokee. The little girl in the pink and yellow dress and white hair bow also got out. Together they went inside and I watched through their front window as they ate a dinner of spaghetti. Well, he ate. She did not touch her food.

“She wants blood,” I muttered.

I slept in my car overnight, and when the father left for work in the morning, I followed the girl. She gave it an hour and then left the house, walked to the bus stop, and took the bus to the strip mall two miles away. She waited on the walkway and watched the people coming and going from the mom and pop stores.

“She’s choosing one,” I said. “She’s finding a victim.”

And so, it was with careful planning that I returned to her house that night with the intent of stopping her. I failed to see what other options I had. I didn’t own a gun, but I owned a hammer, and I figured that could be easily discarded in one of the local strip mall dumpsters.

I waited until her father left for work, and then kicked in the front door. She was sitting on the couch staring at the TV. A teen drama was on. I didn’t recognize it. She looked up and saw me. She screamed, which was very much out of character for her, but I knew it was just a ruse.

I chased her into her father’s bedroom and held her on the floor.

I don’t remember much after that, but I remember her acting skills, the way she was able to generate real fear in her eyes, the shriek in her voice as she yelled trough her horse teeth, “Who are you? Who are you?”

To which I responded, “No, who are you?”

And then, there was blood.

***

The blood was mine. I think. Maybe it was hers. It’s hard to tell. I remember swinging the hammer, but I also remember getting slammed into the wall. I remember the girl’s father standing over me with his gun drawn, screaming at me. An ambulance came, and as I was being laid on a stretcher, I wondered if I’d killed that alien kid, wondered if I’d saved humanity. I heard the neighbors talking as they rolled me into the back of the vehicle.

“He lives a few streets over. Xavier something. He, you know, lives alone, keeps to himself.”

“It’s always the ones that keep to themselves.”

Then I was in a hospital and there was a lot of talk about a bullet in my back.

All the doctors walked with their arms down. I think. They all looked at me like they were studying me, like I wasn’t even human. They were one of them, I’m pretty sure, one of those demon people out to kill humans.

“Did I kill her? Did I succeed?,” I asked the nurses later. They just ignored me.

“You have to stop her!” I wailed. “I was just trying to stop her! To save people!”

***

Years later, after much time in various mental health facilities, I was allowed to return home. My brother, my tether to reality, had purchased my house and used it as a rental property for my time away. The equity had increased three-fold, and he made a nice profit from the renters over the years, and so he kept the deed in his name but let me move back in for a generous rental fee. What a dick.

I received visits from county workers who gave me tests and asked me about my days. They asked me where I went during the day, if anyone came to the door, if I spoke to my brother—which I did, every day.

I did not go to the football games, nor did I venture out to the coffee shops much. Needless to say, between my new life as a monitored hermit and the passing of years since my “incident,” I saw no evidence that the horse-teethed people still existed.

That is, until six months later. I was lying on the living room couch, trying to read, the low watt bulb of my tableside lamp doing it’s best to light my pages, when the front door opened.

I jumped up, my hairs on end, my tongue dry. Shaking, I dropped my book as I watched the man in the fedora enter my house. His massive smile turned toward me, and he nodded. He took steps into the living room, and I lost my breath. I couldn’t scream, couldn’t run, so affixed to the rug I was, frozen in abject terror.

Behind him, the woman in the green dress appeared. She too, entered the room, came to stand before me, her horse teeth yellowed by the dim reading bulb.

“No,” I finally uttered, falling back into the couch. “Please no . . . ” I shut my eyes, waiting for these strange beings to finally do me in.

Lastly, behind her, the little girl in the pink and yellow dress entered. Her giant teeth glowed sallow under the light of my reading lamp.

I heard their footsteps creaking my hardwood floors, all of them coming closer. But they did not stop before me, rather continued past me, into the hallway. They walked their stiff-arm walk, smiled their big-teeth smile, ignoring me.

I moved down the hall, looking for a weapon. Still terrified, I shook my head at them, saw them standing still now, looking at me.

“What do you want?” I finally shouted. “Who are you?” My mind was reeling. I knew this was real. Despite everything the doctors had told me about my own brain playing tricks on me, I knew this event was happening.

It took all my courage to step toward them, ready to fight. They moved toward the doors in the hallway, he toward my bedroom, she toward the guest room, the girl toward the bathroom. Simultaneously, they opened the doors and stepped into the rooms. Then each door slammed shut, shaking the house with such force the lights flickered.

“Get out!” I screamed, racing down the hall. I flung open my bedroom door and flipped on the light. I nearly fell from the weakness in my knees when I saw the room was empty. I checked in the closet. I looked under the bed. The man in the fedora was gone. Only he wasn’t completely gone; his fedora was on the dresser. I snatched it up and crumpled it in my hands.

“No no no no no no,” I stammered, and ran to the guest room. I flung open the door and turned on the light. It was also empty, and my search under the bed and in the closet yielded absolutely nothing. A scrap of green dress hung on the doorknob.

In the bathroom, I found nothing but the bow from the little girl’s hair.

They were all gone, but I had pieces of them in my hands.

I returned to the living room, holding my keepsakes from my unwanted visitors.

I stayed there for three days, the lights on, my eyes wide open, waiting for them to come back.

On the fourth day my county worker arrived and asked me how I was feeling. I showed her the fedora, bow and scrap of green dress.

“What do you see?” I asked.

“A hat and some cloth,” she replied, eyeing me with concern.

“Exactly! They’re real,” I said. “They came into my house. They’re here right now. Watching me. Waiting.”

“Who?”

“The ones with the teeth.”

She cocked her head, somewhat frightened of me. But she kept her voice steady and unwavering. “I don’t see anyone.”

“They’re here,” I said. “They’re in the walls. In the walls of the house.”

“Mr. Garmin, are you taking your medication?”

I saw where this was going, knew I’d be back in a home with bars on the windows if I kept this up in front of her. So I laughed, pointed at her as if to say, gotcha! “Joking,” I said. “Just testing you. Of course I’m taking the meds. And you have nothing to worry about, I’m fine.”

But I wasn’t fine. And when she left twenty minutes later, obviously concerned about me, I sat in the middle of the living room, the fedora, bow and swatch of green in my lap, gripping a steak knife in my hand, waiting for my visitors to come back out of the walls.

For that is where they are. In the walls. In the walls, watching me.

They’re in the walls. And they’re real. But who are they?

And can they withstand a house fire?

Soon enough, we'll see.