PORN DOGS

PORN DOGS

Andrea Nemerson, who writes an alternate sex column for the San Francisco Bay Guardian, published this letter from a reader: “I know this woman, and she has a fetish with bringing dead animals into the bedroom. She likes to dress up in a pink bunny suit and hop around. Then, with the dead animals, she tries to insert them anally. She tickles her cooch with the animals’ tails and then cuts them open and feeds on the spleen and liver.”

Okay, that particular letter turned out to be a hoax. Nevertheless, bestiality fetishes have become quite chic these days. There are websites that feature “slutty chicks” fondling, fucking and sucking horses, snakes, cows, dogs, monkeys, sheep, donkeys, goats, pigs, and occasionally necking with a giraffe or humping a camel. Unlike regular commercial movies shown in theaters, Internet pom doesn’t include any such disclaimers as “No animals were harmed during the making of this film.”

There are no overseers from the American Humane Society. Nor are there any complaints from PETA (People For the Ethical Treatment of Animals).

But in Japan, when it comes to professional porn animals, it’s a different story, or rather, let’s say it’s a horse of another color. In fact, many Japanese porn actresses have been complaining that they only make half the wages of their canine co-stars, who acquire an average of 200,000 yen per movie. In America, an owner might get paid off, but the animals themselves earn nothing except maybe a few extra Dog Yummies.

In Japan, the so-called Butter Dogs are very popular. That name is derived from the spreading of butter on the labia of their mistresses before the great licking scenes. One porn flick, Butter Dog Story DX, featured a dog performing orally on eight women. Labrador Retrievers are a favorite because of their obedient nature and their popularity throughout Japan.

“It is not like we breed them to be Butter Dogs,” explained a spokesperson for Alpha International, the company that produced Butter Dog Story DX. “We mostly use dogs from canine talent agencies. We have to have dogs that are used to being around humans, as well as movie studios. By the way, it is not butter that we lather over the women any more, either. We use non-sugar yogurt. When we used butter, the dogs ended up getting too fat, and we were worried about their health.”

Since few canine talent agencies want to have their clients appear in bestiality movies, producers have to exploit personal contacts in order to get the dog trainers to cooperate. According to an official at one Japanese canine talent agency, “There is no real special training for the Butter Dogs. The most important thing is their nature. Basically, we want dogs that are friendly toward humans and that are obedient. It’s important that they don’t bark. We do train them not to bark unnecessarily. We also teach them not to bark if they’re touched by somebody other than their trainer. These conditions do not apply just for the adult movie world, but for any dog that’s going to appear on screen.”

Japan’s most prolific director of bestiality movies, Sukeo Yamane, points out that Butter Dogs pose certain production problems. “It’s only natural,” he says, “that everybody is a bit worried about diseases when it comes to dogs, even if they’re pets. But I’ve never experienced any sort of illness related problems. Trainers would make sure they never delivered us an infected dog. In fact, trainers are more likely to be worried if the actresses have got a venereal disease. You hear stories of actors being infected by actresses. That’s why we always make sure we only choose girls who are clean. Unlike humans, you can’t put a condom on the dogs because they hate them.”

It has been determined—and believe me, I have no idea how it was determined—that dogs’ lives are shortened if they ejaculate too many times. Tabrador Retrievers usually live for about ten years, but if they’ve appeared in porn flicks (in which dogs are legally allowed to be under eighteen years old), their lifespan is generally cut in half. That’s why responsible canine talent agencies insist that their dogs be permitted to ejaculate only once per day while shooting a porn flick. “Sometimes,” admitted one director, “it takes a full day to do a shoot. Just like humans, dogs aren’t always able to rise when they want to, so we can be stuck around waiting for hours at a time until the pooch is properly aroused. It’s hard to arouse a dog when it’s not in heat. That is why we sometimes start a shoot early in the morning and do not finish it until the middle of the night".

But, hey, wouldn’t you think that they’d have available on the set a fluffer for Fluffy?