DAY 229: GET-YOUR-FREAK-ON FRIDAY
Create a Secret Life

The compulsion to tell one’s partner everything is annoyingly American and erotically stifling. You need a private sex life. Maybe this place will exist only in your head. That’s fine. Nurture your fantasy garden; you can renew, replenish, and reinvent your sexuality.

Some secret life suggestions:

• Visit a nude beach.

• Let your secret “top” or “bottom” come out—in fantasy if not reality.

• Make sexual demands.

• Go to a swing club.

• Buy a new sex toy and keep it from your lover.

• Ditto for a DVD.

• Have a flirtation (or a fling?) with someone else.

• Masturbate—and don’t tell your lover.

• Go out alone for a drink and seduce a stranger.

• Tell an opposite-sex friend a sexual secret your partner doesn’t know.

Make your secret sex life wish lists—and don’t share them.

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