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LYRIC‘S CAPITULATION was imminent. If wearing the dress was the only way he could get back home, he had to do it. He wore the dress, and he wore it with his head held high.
Until Aurora saw him and nearly suffocated from a fit giggles.
“I’m sorry... I’m sorry! I don’t mean to laugh!” Aurora was wiping away tears of laughter as she tried to regain her composure, but it was no use. As soon as she took another look at Lyric in the dress, she started cackling again.
“Ohhhh, go ahead and laugh!” Lyric snarled. “Laugh at me all you want!”
“I’m not laughing at YOU, Lyric. It’s just... the dress... on you... it’s too much!” Aurora reached up and straightened his curly red wig. “You don’t look too bad, actually. You make an attractive woman.”
“Thank you. It’s so comforting, of course, to hear you say that.” If the sarcasm in his voice wasn’t enough, he added, “I’m joking, of course. To hear you say I’m an attractive woman is devastating, to say the least.”
“Is it? It’s not so bad.”
“You never even said I was attractive as a man!”
“Quiet!” Aurora shouted at him all of a sudden. “I think something’s happening downstairs.”
“Really? I don’t hear anything.”
Aurora grabbed Lyric by the frilly sleeve of his dress and pulled him over to the door. She pressed her ear against it and tried to eavesdrop on the crisis that was unfolding on the floor below them.
“Absolutely not! No, you can’t go!”
“But all the women in the realm are invited! It’s not fair!”
“Don’t talk back to me, young lady! If you want to walk to the ball, that’s fine. But you’re not riding in any carriage of ours!”
“But the castle is nearly five miles off!”
“Too bad, so sad!”
“The castle is no place for the likes of you, Cydney!”
“Let’s see how the prince likes your dress after I’m done with it!”
The voices were followed by the sickening sounds of ripping fabric, a sob, and laughter.
Aurora turned to Lyric. “Oh no...”
Lyric was wincing. “It doesn’t sound like that went well.”
A few minutes later, Cydney ran up the stairs, her face flooded with tears. The sleeves of her dress were torn and her hair was a mess. She burrowed her head against Aurora’s shoulder and sobbed uncontrollably.
Aurora tried her best to console the inconsolable girl. “D-don’t cry. We might be able to salvage this.”
“N-no,” Cyndey answered with a sniffle. “No, it’s impossible! I know it is. It just wasn’t meant to be.”
“Oh, don’t say that! We can fix the dress, and then we can hoof it over to the castle. Lyric and I were going to walk, anyway. If you have some good walking shoes, five miles isn’t so bad!”
Cydney made a gesture toward the torn sleeves, which dangled irreparably from their threads. “There’s no way we can fix this!”
“Well... m-m-maybe we can.” Aurora tried to sound encouraging, but it really did seem like a monstrous task. Whomever ripped her dress made certain to do a thorough job. “S-sit down on that stool, okay? I’ll try to sew it up as fast as I can.”
“Okay.” Cydney’s shoulders were slumping as she shuffled toward the stool. Aurora stood beside her, needle and hand, and prepared to tackle the job.
“I won’t prick you, I promise.” Having said that, Aurora plunged her needle into the fabric and started to make repairs.
“I can’t believe this! I was so happy when I saw you finish the dress, and now...” Cydney still had tears rolling down her cheeks. “Oh, I can’t believe this is happening!”
“Just take a gander at Lady Lyric from time to time. That should cheer you up.”
Cydney did as she was told, and her tears momentarily turned to laughter.
“Well, at least I’m useful for something,” Lyric grumbled. While Aurora sewed, he decided to dig though a few more boxes.
After a few minutes or so, Aurora realized the repairs on the dress weren’t going so smoothly. “Is there... is there any other dress you could wear? Do you have anything else?”
“No... not really. All my other dresses look like something a maid would wear. They’re old and gray and—”
“What about your step-sisters? Do they have anything you could borrow?”
Cydney shook her head. “They’re not my size.”
“Well, maybe we could pin them...”
“They’re really not my size!” Cydney insisted, leaving no room to doubt their corpulence.
There was only one more solution she could think of. “Well, you could always wear my dress, I suppose. I know it’s a little bit low-cut, but—”
“Hey, what’s this?” Lyric dipped his hand into one of the boxes and pulled out an old urn. “This is an ugly old thing, huh?”
“Oh, NO WAY!” Aurora ran over to him and snatched the urn out of his hands. “This can’t be what I think it is!”
“What? What is it?” Cydney rose from the stool and went over to them. When she saw the urn in Aurora’s hands, she sighed. “Oh, that’s nothing. My step-mother bought that a few days ago from a crazy old lady.”
Aurora held it up to the light. “I can’t believe this. You don’t understand... I’ve SEEN this urn before.”
“Oh, you have?”
“Yeah, I remember the markings. And this rust is unforgettable. Cydney... hold out your hand.” When she did, Aurora pressed the urn against Cydney’s palm. “I’d explain what this is, but I think it would be better if you tried it yourself. Why don’t you give it a rub?”
Cydney, as well as Lyric, looked utterly confused. “Rub the urn?”
“Yeah. Pretend like you’re polishing it or something.”
“Okaaay.” Looking skeptical, Cydney followed Aurora’s advice. The reason behind the pretend polish was soon revealed. There was a loud POP, a cloud of smoke, and—
A familiar blue face. His hair was in curlers, and he didn’t look happy.
“WHO dares to take me up at this hour?” Helmer flailed his fists in the air like a madman, which was somewhat amusing, considering his diminutive size.
Lyric and Cydney were completely dumbstruck. It didn’t look like they would be capable of speech anytime soon, so Aurora spoke on their behalf. “Hi. Remember me?”
The blue man turned his beady eyes on Aurora. “What in the... but you only get one wish! I thought I explained that to you!” He shook his head with disbelief. “You broads are always so selfish...”
“But, wait! I wasn’t the one who woke you up! It was her!”
Cydney gasped. “I-I-I-I-I-I... I didn’t know what I was doing! She told me to do it!” she pointed at Aurora.
“Oh, well, in that case.” Helmer sat on the floor and crossed his stumpy legs. “I guess I owe you a wish then, don’t I?”
“Uhhh, Aurora?” Cydney’s voice squeaked. “What in the world is going on?”
“My thoughts exactly,” Lyric echoed.
“I think he’d do a better job of explaining it than I would.” Aurora looked down at Helmer and gave him an encouraging smile.
“Oh, yeah? You woke me up, and now you want me to explain things?” He rolled his eyes and grumbled something rude. “This is a magic lamp, yadda yadda yadda, and I’m supposed to grant your wish, Sweetheart.”
“MY wish?” Cyndey repeated.
“The world has gone mad,” Lyric babbled. “Right before my eyes... all gone mad.”
“There are some stipulations, of course, but we’ll cross that bridge when we get to it. Blah blah blah. So gimme your wish.” He started to pull the curlers out of his hair, and when he did, tight black curls seemed to snap in place on his head.
“You don’t have to be so rude,” Aurora suggested with a sigh.
“Well, what were you expecting, lady? Were you expecting me to pop out with cotton candy and carnival games? When someone wakes you up at two o’clock in the morning, are you all smiles and rainbows? It might be five o’clock for you, but I’m operating on a different time zone, people!” Suddenly, the blue man turned his attention to Lyric. “By the way, I hope you liked your skin suit.”
Lyric’s jaw dropped open. “Huh?”
“Never mind. So, Girlie...” He pulled a pipe from behind his ear, and with a snap of his fingers, it was lit. “Got any idea what you might want?”
“Well, I do want to go to the ball.”
Helmer stuck the pipe in the corner of his mouth and sucked on it. “Alright, one ball, coming right up. If your friend would just explain to you the proper way to ask for the wish...”
“But, wait!” Cydney spoke up. “I can’t go in this dress. Can you fix it?”
“That I can do. But you only get one wish, babe. If you ask for the dress, I can’t get you to the ball. I’m not made of carriages, and I ain’t no fairy godmother.”
“Then I guess I’ll ask you to fix the dress...”
Aurora tapped her on the shoulder. “If you’re going to ask him to fix the dress, you have to start your sentence with the words, I wish.”
“Really?”
“Uh-huh. It’s a formality.”
“Okay, then.” Cydney squared her shoulders and took a deep breath. “I wish for you to fix this dress.”
“Alrightie. A-one, a-two, and voila!” Helmer pointed a finger at Cydney, and before she could say abracadabra, the threads on her torn sleeves started sewing themselves up. A moment later, Cydney’s dress was as good as new.
As Lyric watched the magic take place, he looked more stunned than anyone. “I hope there’s another pair of large lady’s underwear in there, because I think I’m in danger of soiling mine.”
Aurora turned to him. “After everything we’ve been through, you’re still surprised to see stuff like this?”
“Always.” Lyric nodded. “Always.”