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I pace in front of my mom in the living room of my house while she pretends to watch her daily soap on TV. She keeps throwing tiny smiles my way, enjoying my discomfort even though she very well knows Damien and I are fighting. But no, my mother is not concerned. As it is she’s always scolded me for being the most stubborn girl in the world. The next time she looks at me, I scowl at her. But it has no effect, as usual, so I continue to pace.
It’s our first weekend here in Mumbai and now it’s been almost a week since that fight with Damien. Once he confirmed that he was indeed planning to leave Rian and me behind while he returned to London to face all the challenges waiting for him there, I stopped talking to him altogether. And although I am furious with him for even considering that option, I hate this stillness between us. I am quite done sulking around by myself. But Damien is happily continuing on as if I don’t matter to him.
Even now, he’s invited Mike and my dad with him to take Rian swimming in the pool in our building and he didn’t even ask me. Meredith has gone with them while Leo has been instructed to stay with me and right now he is working on his laptop on the terrace deck outside.
Damien’s reverted to being sullen and quiet, and his behavior is grating my nerves now. The only time I do see some form of emotion on his face is when I wake up in the morning and find him curled around me. But then the day starts and so does his silence.
God! That man.
My mom’s lips curve and I cross my hands and stand in front of her, blocking her line of vision to the TV.
“What?” I ask her. “Stop smirking and talk please.”
She turns off the TV with the remote and pats on the sofa beside her.
I huff but do as she says and settle next to her.
“Why don’t you first tell me what is bothering you, Aaliya?” my mom asks.
“Well, apart from the fact that my husband has lost all interest in me, nothing!” I seethe.
She chuckles. “And what makes you think that?”
“Do you know the first day we went to office, we had an argument over nothing really and then instead of coming straight home to fix things between us, he texted me to tell me Gabe was taking him out to some familiar haunts to try and jog his memory?”
“So? He did a guy thing. What’s the big deal?” she points out. “If I’m not mistaken, that was Gabe’s only night in town, wasn’t it?”
“Yes, it was, Mom, and of course, that was not an issue. My problem is that he hasn’t spoken properly to me since. The next day we had a huge fight because of his adamant refusal to accept that this was his life here. And after that, I learnt he was planning to return to London without Rian and me. We fought again and now he’s been withdrawn and aloof since. And I don’t like this distance that has sprung up between us one bit.”
My mom plucks my hand that had been twirling a strand of my hair.
“Aaliya, why don’t you get it that he must be finding it hard to fit in here? The last time he came here, he had certain reasons for wanting to disappear in a city like Mumbai. Maybe he welcomed everything here that allowed him to be normal because of those very reasons. But now he only remembers the life prior to his life here. That life he led was privileged and most unlike how we live. So why can you not understand that perhaps he is struggling to fit in here and you being difficult has not made it easy for him. Have you tried to talk to him again?”
When I shake my head, she clucks her tongue. “I know you, and you can be equally tough and adamant, Aaliya.”
I make a face at her and she raises her brow.
Sighing aloud, I consider what she’s said. In the end, I realize it is true and I have behaved rather difficult because Damien had tried to make up with me in the initial days post our fight, but I was so angry with him that I’d just ignored him. And now, annoyed by that, he’s doing the same and I can’t tolerate it anymore.
“You’re right, Ma,” I accept. “I have made it hard too. Maybe I should have understood that he’s been finding all this hard. But instead of helping him, I’ve...I’ve pushed him away.”
“Look, Aaliya, you both have been through so much already. You were shot in front of his eyes! Don’t you think he may be feeling guilty about it?”
“But, Mom, I just want him to accept everything and live a normal life.”
“Aaliya, he’s battling his own demons. Why can’t you see that? Give him the space he needs to come to terms with everything, rather than badgering him about it. Listen to his fears rather than reacting to them.”
“Uff...maybe I haven’t been thinking from his point of view at all, Mom.” I bite my lower lip, thinking before I continue, “The truth is that we have gone through so much already and I just thought he’d come here and everything in his mind would click and things would be back to normal. I never anticipated how different our life here would seem to him and that he would find it hard to accept it. I’m so stupid. I should have understood him better. I simply let this quarrel go on.”
I exhale before continuing. “These little fights tend to bug the life out of me and if I am completely honest then they make me feel insecure too.”
She pats my hand.
“You don’t need to be. Five years back when you came to us and told us that you had fallen in love with a Brit, I didn’t understand it. I couldn’t even accept it as true until I met him and saw how smitten he was with you. And that hasn’t changed, despite everything. So, be strong for both your sakes and be patient with him.”
I give her a warm smile. “Thanks, Mom. You truly are the best.”
She smiles. “Now, what are you going to wear for your uncle’s birthday tonight?”
I think through my options and a perfect idea forms in my head. I just hope it helps me gain my husband’s attention.
