12 

Chin in hand, Caitlyn swayed to the music of The Palace Hotel orchestra, feet tapping a waltz beneath the crisp linen tablecloth aglow with candles. The scent of gardenias drifted from exquisite blossoms gracing the table where they’d enjoyed Logan’s birthday dinner. Closing her eyes, she almost felt seventeen again, a starry-eyed girl whirling in the arms of Logan McClare, the most handsome man in the ballroom of the brand-new Palace Hotel. Even now, the powerful scent of his lime shaving soap merged with the tang of lemon oil from the lustrous oak dance floor, conjuring a memory so strong, her heart swooped in her chest. Her eyelids lifted to see Logan spin Maddie on the dance floor, her daughter’s shin-length taffeta dress ballooning while auburn curls fluttered in the breeze. He gobble-kissed Maddie’s neck, and Caitlyn’s smile faded. She might have been his daughter instead of his niece . . .

“Goodness, you belong on that dance floor, Aunt Cait.” Cassie slipped into a chair next to her, back from the ladies’ room. “I could see your toe twitching from across the room.”

Caitlyn glanced up, lips easing into a languid smile. “I’ll get my chance, Cass. Both Jamie and Bram promised me a dance, so I’m just biding my time.”

Cassie leaned close, mischief in her tone. “You mean Uncle Logan hasn’t asked yet? The way he’s been ogling you, I just assumed you’d be the first name on his dance card.”

“Cassidy Margaret McClare!” Caitlyn grabbed her napkin and promptly fanned herself. “Good heavens, your Uncle Logan is my brother-in-law, young lady, and nothing more.”

Cassie’s chuckle floated in the air. “Maybe nothing more to you, Aunt Cait, but I’ve only been here a little over a month, and already I can see Uncle Logan is smitten, just like Alli says.”

“Alli said that?” Alarm crept into Cait’s tone while heat crept up her cheeks.

Her niece’s grin tipped in tease. “And not just Alli—Meg and Blake joke about it too.”

“Good heavenly days,” Caitlyn whispered, bolting her water down. “Well, it’s simply not tr—” She froze midsyllable, the memory of that night on the veranda halting her air. His tenderness, his comfort over her missing Liam, his unsettling words. “It’s been almost two years, Cait—don’t you think you could use a fresh start too?” It was the first time she’d seen desire so blatant in his eyes, and it had scared her as much as hearing her children had noticed it too. Yes, he’d been more attentive to them all in the last six months, dropping in more than ever before. And heaven knows he could be an outrageous flirt with any woman including her, lavishing attention on any female around, which is all she’d assumed it to be. But now she suspected her uneasiness in his presence wasn’t just the unwanted feelings he awakened in her . . . Her hands shook as she gulped an unladylike swig of water. But am I doing the same to him?

“Simply not true?” Cassie repeated softly with a duck of her head, sympathy edging her smile. She touched her aunt’s arm. “Really, Aunt Cait, would it be such a horrible thing if it were? Uncle Logan is one of the most eligible bachelors in the city—attractive, fun, and crazy about you and your children. Call me a dreamer, but it seems like a match made in heaven.”

“No, not in heaven.” Cait’s whisper was no more than a rasp as her gaze followed Logan dancing with her daughter, eyes closed while he snuggled her close. “Oh, that it were . . .”

“What do you mean?”

Caitlyn looked up, startled that she’d spoken out loud. She stared at her niece, heart thumping, then blinked, her words cleaving to the roof of her mouth. She’d never intended to discuss her past with anyone, and certainly not with her own children, determined they need never know their father was not her first love. But the silence threatened to choke her, and her longing to confide in someone who would understand was growing greater every day. She assessed the deep ridges of concern in her niece’s face and suddenly realized Cassie may well be that perfect someone, a woman badly bruised by a man with no faith in God. And a woman who just may need to hear what Caitlyn had to say.

Body quivering as much as the water in her glass, Caitlyn quickly downed it before leaning close, hand to her niece’s arm. “Cassie, I’ve never shared this with anyone—not my children, my friends, no one. But somehow I feel compelled to confide in you. Not just because I’m tired of carrying this burden alone, but because I believe it’s something you need to hear.” She brushed a strand of hair from her niece’s face, eyes warm with affection and concern. “But first, you must promise this will be our secret and you will not tell anyone else.” Her gaze flicked to the dance floor where Jamie danced with Alli, and Bram with Meg. “Especially your cousins.”

Cassie nodded, her unusual pale-green eyes as wide and clear as a mossy mountain pool.

Filling her lungs with a heavy dose of air, Caitlyn slowly released it again, squaring her shoulders. “Remember the handsome rogue I was engaged to before your Uncle Liam?”

Cassie’s head bobbed in slow motion, her breathing suddenly suspended.

A lump dipped in Caitlyn’s throat while her gaze darted to where Logan was trading partners with Bram. “Well, you see . . . it was your Uncle Logan.”

A gasp popped from Cassie’s lips, the mountain pool swelling to lake proportions.

Cait couldn’t help but smile, her niece’s reaction tilting her lips. “Yes, I’m afraid so.”

A waiter appeared with a sterling pitcher in hand, replenishing Cait’s water glass. “Oh, bless you,” she said, awarding him a warm smile. She took a quick drink and set it back down, fingers absently grazing the cool moisture of the crystal goblet. “In fact, it was in this very room where Logan proposed to me almost twenty-seven years ago.” A frail sigh drifted from her lips as she leaned back in the chair, eyes straying to where he danced with her second daughter. “He was quite the catch in those days, you know, a rogue about town, much as he is now. But we fell so desperately in love and I was so naïve, that I just naturally assumed his wild ways were over.”

Her eyes trailed into a vacant stare, the awful memory still able to constrict the muscles of her throat. “A painful assumption that forced me to grow up quite quickly, I’m afraid. Right after we became engaged, I discovered Logan was having an affair with another woman. An ‘innocent final fling,’ I believe he called it when he begged my forgiveness, but the damage was done. I realized I could never trust him again, not just because of his many indiscretions that I subsequently learned about, but because I knew deep in my soul he was not a man of God.” Her lips bent in a sad smile. “Something I had conveniently closed my eyes to because I was so much in love.”

Her eyelids slowly lifted. “I have no doubt, Cassie, that God spared you from a less-than-fulfilling marriage with Mark. I believe he spared me from the same through the incredible friendship—and eventual deep love—of your Uncle Liam.” She patted Cassie’s hand. “As much as I care for your Uncle Logan—and I do—it grieves me to say when it comes to other women and God, he hasn’t changed all that much. And if I’ve learned anything from my dear, sweet husband, it’s that I will never—ever—settle for another relationship without God in the center.” She gently cupped Cassie’s cheek, the intensity in her voice bleeding from her very soul. “I love you, darling, and I’m asking you to promise the same. Promise you’ll save your heart for God’s best, a man who loves God as much as you do. Because therein lies a love like no other.”

Moisture glimmered in her niece’s eyes. “I promise, Aunt Cait—you have my word.”

“Mama, Mama—Uncle Logan said we can have an overnight in Napa if you say yes!” Maddie flew into her arms totally breathless, cheeks as flushed as Cait’s, no doubt, as Logan followed behind with a smile that quivered her stomach. “He says he wants all of us to come for Fourth of July—Bram and Jamie too!”

“Is that so?” Cait notched a brow, her demeanor calm even if her pulse wasn’t. She bundled Maddie on her lap. “And just exactly why must it be overnight?”

“A three-day weekend, Mrs. McClare,” Logan said easily, the twinkle in his eye doing nothing for her peace of mind. He offered a slight bow before seating Meg in her chair. “The Fourth is on a Friday this year, so I thought it’d be fun to make a weekend of it, especially since I’ll be tied up for the next month and won’t be able to see as much of the kids. But, by the Fourth, I’ll be at your complete and utter disposal to celebrate with my family.”

Her lips sloped into a dry smile. “Mmm—utter disposal.” She tilted her head. “Now, if that only meant ‘disposal’ of your plan to fill my children’s summer with nothing but frivolity.”

“Ah, but not just your children’s summer, Cait,” he whispered, bending to give Cassie a squeeze while he smiled at Caitlyn, his shuttered gaze toasting her cheeks.

“Please, Mama? It’ll be fun.” Maddie whirled on her lap, stubby arms clinging to her mother’s neck. “Meg and I want to go, and so will Alli.”

“So will Alli what?” Allison asked, out of breath as she plopped in her chair.

“Spend the Fourth of July at my estate in Napa,” Logan interjected. “A family event, and Jamie, Bram, Liddy, and Patricia are invited too.”

A gleam lit Alli’s eyes. “Oooo . . . is your handsome neighbor home for the summer?”

Logan gave her a wink. “He is, and asking when my nieces are coming to visit.”

Pleasure glowed in Alli’s cheeks. “Then count me in.” She wiggled her brows at Cassie. “Just wait till you see Mr. Roger Luepke, Cass—he’s beautiful!”

“I’ll have you know, Al, the term ‘beautiful’ does not apply to any man worth his salt,” Blake said, returning from a dance with a girl from the next table.

“Sure it does,” Alli said with a tussle of Jamie’s hair. “Just look at Pretty Boy here.”

“Hey, hands off.” Jamie batted at her. “These blasted curls are hard enough to restrain.”

“Like the man, no doubt,” Cassie quipped, sending a ruddy flush up Jamie’s neck.

His lips stole into a little-boy smile. “I’ll have you know restraint is my middle name, Miss McClare,” he said with a fake Texas drawl, “unless needlessly provoked.”

“So . . . ,” Logan interrupted, scanning the table before honing in on Cait. “Everybody game? Dinner on the patio followed by fireworks Friday night, a swim picnic by the lake Saturday afternoon, dinner and games into the wee hours of the morning?”

“Yes!” Maddie bounced on Caitlyn’s lap, her excitement echoed by everyone at the table.

Except me. Caitlyn drew in a tight breath, quite certain spending the weekend at Logan’s would not be a good thing, at least not for her. Her mind scrambled for an excuse. “I’m so sorry, Logan, but we can’t miss church on Sunday.”

“You won’t,” he said calmly. The edge of his mouth twitched at the groans that rounded the table, not the least of which was from Maddie who rattled Caitlyn’s arm with panic in her eyes. A deadly smile curved on his lips, once capable of reducing her insides to mush. She absently pressed a hand to her stomach as he continued. “You remember Harold Hough, don’t you?”

Heat steamed Cait’s cheeks at the mention of Logan’s friend from college, the best man in their wedding before she’d broken the engagement. Mercifully, Logan didn’t wait for her answer. “Well, old Harry’s been Father Harry at a church in Napa for the last ten years now, so he’ll be staying over as well.” He took the chair next to Cait, giving her elbow a light tweak. “So we’ll all attend his church in the valley Sunday morning.”

She blinked, eyes suddenly spanning wide at his words. Logan McClare? In church? Her voice came out as a croak as she pulled Maddie close on her lap. “All?”

“I’m not the heathen you think I am, Cait,” he said quietly, his words warm and laced with tease. “Harry’s been working on me a long time, you know.”

A muscle dipped in her throat. No . . . I didn’t.

He tickled Maddie’s stomach, the effect unleashing a shiver through Cait when his fingers grazed hers in the process. “Come on, Cait, everybody’s on board but you.” He tugged Maddie from her arms, settling her into his lap with a kiss while his gaze fused to Caitlyn’s. A gleam of a dare lit gray eyes that sparkled like the sterling silver spoon her daughter aimed at his half-eaten dessert. “Besides, what if the Vigilance Committee actually coerces you into joining their ranks?” he teased, his cavalier tone making it clear he didn’t think she would. “Your family time will be cut short, so it’s best to make memories while you can, especially while Cassie is here.” He gave her a playful wink that likely painted her face the color of the strawberry garnish Maddie now spooned in her mouth. “Who knows? This could be your golden opportunity to coax me to side with you at the next Board of Supervisors meeting.”

Her pulse slowed, knowing full well that as one of the most influential members of the San Francisco Board of Supervisors, he could be a valuable ally in her efforts to clean up the Coast. Since Liam’s death, Walter and the other members of the Vigilance Committee had begged her to use her influence with Logan, but she had turned them down. She certainly held no sway over a man who had a vested interest in keeping the Coast alive. A lump thickened in her throat. Until now, apparently. Assessing the challenge in a gaze that boldly held her own, she paused, not a woman prone to coaxing, and yet . . . the stakes had never been higher. Nor the risks, she reminded herself with a queasy feeling. Especially since Logan had no idea she’d already accepted the position. She drew in a fortifying breath and released it slowly. “All right, you’re on. Allow me to share Walter’s plan and take us to church, and we have a deal.”

Maddie sprang from Logan’s lap with a loud squeal, rounding the table to tell the others the good news. Logan chuckled, his husky tone for her ears alone. “Why, Caitlyn McClare, you little siren, you—who would have thought?”

Lunging for her water, she wished she could cool her cheeks with it instead. Or douse a smirk on a handsome rogue’s face. She closed her eyes to shut him out, throat convulsing as she glugged, glass bottom up.

“Mama, Mama, I’m so excited!” Cheeks flushed, Maddie skipped to her side, perching on tiny toes to plant a kiss to her cheek. “We get to sleep at Uncle Logan’s—isn’t that great?”

Great? Caitlyn blinked. For the Board, maybe. She promptly upended her glass before Logan smiled and emptied his water into hers. But for her? Ice slivered down her throat after she bolted it down again.

Most definitely not.