Leia found Jacen where he had been for the last several days—tinkering with one of the captured E-wings. Since they had taken the freighter, he had hardly said a word to anyone, and on their return to the Maw he had thrown himself into the project of fitting the fighter with augmented shields and readying her for extended flight. Han had been almost as sullen. Her husband was tough, but there was only so much loss that even Han Solo could take. It had been good to see something of his old cocky, arrogant self reemerge, though she wasn’t going to admit that to him aloud.
But Han’s good humor had been short-lived. His fight with Jacen and the following silence had managed to leak most of the fuel from his engines.
Jacen glanced down at her from near the astromech housing, but didn’t say anything.
“Jacen,” Leia said, “could I talk to you, please? Or do you intend never to speak to me again?”
Jacen gazed down again. “What’s there to talk about? I think you and Dad have presented your point of view from pretty much every angle there is, and I think you know mine.”
“It must be nice to be so sure about everything,” Leia told him.
Jacen uttered a short, guttural laugh. “Yeah,” he replied, “must be.”
That had a raw sound to it that bothered Leia. How could someone so young sound so cynical? Especially Jacen, whose ideals had always been lofty ones. Of course, she knew better than anyone that most cynics were crash-burned idealists. Was Jacen that hurt?
It made what she had come to say all the harder, but she had to say it.
“Anyway,” she said, taking the plunge, “you’re wrong. There is another angle to look at this from.”
“And what would that be?” Jacen asked. She didn’t know whether he sounded more like Han or herself in that moment of caustic sarcasm, and she wasn’t sure which would make her angrier.
“Jacen, would you knock off the rebellious teen act for just a minute? And maybe consider for just a second that the entire galaxy doesn’t spin around you and your moral decisions?”
Jacen continued to stare stonily at her, but he lifted his shoulders lightly, as if accepting yet another onerous burden. “I can try that,” he said. “What have I missed?”
“You’ve missed that your father needs you, that’s what. That I need you.”
“That’s not fair,” Jacen said. “I don’t want to be a pirate, so you’ll try emotional blackmail?”
“Is that what you call it? Jacen, maybe we weren’t the best of parents. Maybe we weren’t around as much as we could have been, and maybe this is your way of paying us back. But if your only interpretation of ‘your father needs you’ is that I’m trying to manipulate you, then I’ve been a far worse mother than I ever dreamed. If that’s all you see, by all means, go. I wouldn’t want you on those terms.”
“Mom, I—” His voice went strange, and with a sudden start she saw he had tears in his eyes.
“Oh, Jacen—” she began.
“No, Mom, it’s all right.” He clambered down from the craft and wiped at his eyes. “I deserved that.”
“I didn’t come here to hurt you. I’m not even sure I came here to persuade you to stay with us. I just wanted to try to explain why your father is acting the way he is. Jacen, your dad is always proud of you even when he doesn’t understand you, which is most of the time. He’s always tried to be supportive of your decision to become a Jedi Knight, even though the farther you step into that world the farther you go from him. You’re more a part of Luke’s universe than you are of his, and his biggest fear is that you’re ashamed of him, or somehow think him less because of what he is, because he can never be or even fully understand what you’re becoming. Deep down he knows he’s losing you a little more each day, and that soon enough you’ll be strangers. This little spat of yours has only served to confirm that for him.”
“He told you all of this?”
“Of course not. Han doesn’t talk about things like that. But I know him, Jacen.”
“You’re right, then.”
Leia frowned, a little confused by this sudden turnabout. “About what?”
“You’re right—I hadn’t quite seen things from that vector. Thanks. Thanks for telling me.”
She reached to embrace him, and to her relief, he folded willingly into her arms.
“How could he ever think I was ashamed of him?” Jacen whispered.
They parted, and Jacen looked at her through tear-sparkled eyes. “This is one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do,” he said.
Leia’s heart felt like neutronium. “You’re still going?” she asked.
He shook his head. “I decided to stay with you guys two days ago.”
“What?”
“Dad was right. Or part of what he said was right. I made a commitment when I came out here with you. I’m holding to that commitment. And with me along, we’re more likely to be able to hijack these ships without hurting anyone. I’ll be able to tell if there are captives on board. Turning my back on this whole thing feels worse than being a part of it. I still don’t like it, but I’ll do it. I won’t fight Dad anymore.”
“Then why have you been working on the E-wing?”
Jacen shrugged. “It was something to do other than sit around waiting to get into another fight. Somebody can use it. That’s why we took it, right?”
“Right,” Leia assented.
“So when do we head back out?”
“Soon. The captain of the freighter gave up some interesting information. They came via Wayland, which is where they picked up the weapons, but most of the cargo originated on Kuat.”
“Kuat?”
“Yes,” Leia said. “Of course, we don’t know exactly who sent the supplies—the company name they gave was a shell, and we haven’t worked back to who’s really the source of the funds, but we will.”
“Jaina thought there was something rotten about the senator from Kuat, Viqi Shesh, when they met back on Duro. You don’t think …?”
“I don’t trust Viqi Shesh as far as an Ewok could throw her,” Leia said. “But it’s still too early to make accusations.” She paused. “By the way, there’s something else you should know—there’s news from Coruscant. Chief Fey’lya ordered Luke’s arrest.”
“You’re kidding. He really made good on that threat?”
“Maybe, or maybe it was just a more elaborate bluff. Luke and Mara didn’t take any chances, though. They left before the arrest could be made and joined up with Booster.” Her voice softened. “So you see, there are other things you could be doing.”
“Now you’re trying to change my mind again?”
“No,” Leia said firmly.
“Fine,” Jacen answered. “What else did you learn from the captain?”
“That there will be another ship along in a few days—a freighter full of captives.”
Jacen tried on a little smile. “Well, I’d better finish up with this E-wing today, then, if the Princess of Blood is going to be there to meet it.”
“Don’t you start that nonsense, too. Just because you’re going with us doesn’t mean you have to indulge every stupid thing your father comes up with, you know,” Leia said.
“No, you’re right to the core, Mom. We Solo men have to stick together. And I kinda like the name. I’ve been thinking about something to paint on the side—”
“This conversation is now over,” Leia said, as seriously as she could. But she felt she could breathe freely again for the first time in several days, as if her lungs were suddenly twice the size they had been.
“Let me tell Dad, huh?” Jacen said.
“You’ve got it.” With a lighter step, she went to make her own preparations.