CHAPTER 21

I TAKE THE END-OF-YEAR STATE EXAMS ALONE, IN A SMALL room attached to the principal’s office. I don’t get to see the rest of the school or any of the kids.

I don’t belong here anymore.

But I will come back this summer, along with Chad whether or not he wants me. We’ll still be friends. I imagine his surprised look when I tell him we’ll be in summer school together. Maybe even in the same classroom, once they discover I really know everything and can be his private tutor.

When the assistant principal instructs me, I open the first page of my test booklet. Algebra I.

#1: The equations 12x + 18y = 48 and 18x + 18y = 63 represent the money collected from the sale of cupcakes and doughnuts on two different days. If x represents the cost of cupcakes, how much does each cupcake cost? (A) $1.00; (B) $1.50; (C) $2.00; (D) $2.50.

Easy. Cupcakes are $2.50. I darken the circle next to (A).

Every few times, I get one right. Missing every single question seems too deliberate.

I could have scored at least a 96 on the Algebra I exam.

Instead, I’m getting a 45.

I work out every problem in my head so I know which circles are wrong and which are most likely to be because of a careless error. Where it says to show the work, I make the careless error. Like #1: Not reading the problem carefully enough. Or #3: Solving the equations in the wrong order.

About halfway through the test, I consider erasing all my wrong answers and putting the right ones in. It will be embarrassing to fail a test. I used to cry when I got below a 90. Ms. Latimer will say it’s my fault for spending too much time making videos. She may change her mind and recommend me for the ED/LD class.

I know Dad will be angry with me. He’s arranging to go on tour as an extra musician with a band after I leave, but now he’ll have to stay home and work at Tech Town while I attend summer school. Too bad for him. He should have stood up for me and not let Mami take me away from my only friends.

Mami will be angry too, but it doesn’t matter because she isn’t coming home anyway. She’s busy in Montreal with her new band and the famous singer. I don’t think she misses me nearly as much as Mrs. Mac said she does. And now, Max—one of her normal children—is up there for the summer, playing keyboards with the band, while the other normal child, whose name I refuse to mention, has an internship in Boston.

I hand the assistant principal my answer sheet fifteen minutes early.

Next comes social studies.

#1: Farmers in the South who lived on land belonging to a large landowner, and who paid rent with part of their harvest rather than with money, were called (A) sodbusters; (B) migrants; (C) sharecroppers; (D) muckrakers.

Instead of (C), I fill in (A).

Unlike Algebra I, social studies has an essay portion. I’m supposed to interpret a cartoon about the Gilded Age and write a paragraph. I get the dates wrong and write about the Roaring Twenties.

I decide not to fail my science test. I’m already in summer school anyway for math and social studies. Science is my favorite subject. I could teach it, if Chad would only let me, and I can’t see myself going over things I recite in my sleep.

I figure on a perfect 100 in science and 45 in Algebra I. I don’t know about social studies because they could grade my essay easy. But I got wrong more than half the multiple choice and true-false questions.

Just before opening my English test, I think again about Dad and how he’ll probably take away my computer forever. That would mean no classes with Mr. Internet. And no way to upload videos.

I can still meet Mr. Internet at the public library. Hey, Dad, I’m going to the library to study. So I won’t have to repeat eighth grade, you know. Yes. That’s what I’ll tell him.

Since they don’t let you make and upload YouTube videos at the library, I’ll have to ask Antonio. As I guessed, he didn’t mind when I told him that I lost my computer for not doing my homework. Veg offered to upload the videos to his computer and edit them for me, but his aren’t getting as many hits as mine did. So I’m pretty sure Antonio will say yes to me coming over and using his computer.

I imagine myself with Antonio at his big, fancy house. Making sandwiches in the kitchen, everything shiny and clean, tile floors and granite countertops like in Hogar, the home-decorating magazine in Spanish Mami used to read. They keep sending it to us even though she’s no longer here.

The assistant principal interrupts my thoughts. “Time’s passing. You need to focus on the test.”

I realize I’ve been staring at the clock. Twenty minutes have passed of my allotted hour. And, no, I can’t hand in a blank page.

I start with the essays. This time, I answer the two questions, but I print so slowly and neatly that I have a work of art when the assistant principal calls time, but only a third of the little circles for the vocabulary and grammar parts filled in. At least when they read the essays, the people grading the test won’t think I’m a complete idiot.

I smile and hand the assistant principal my answer sheets for the English exam. She wishes me a good summer.

I could write a book on how to fail the state exams on purpose.