“Alexander,” Norris’s tone stopped me in my tracks. “You’re being paranoid.”
I stared at him, then considered his position. I’d damn near worn a hole through the carpet in my sitting room. Clara was scheduled to be home an hour ago, but she hadn’t arrived yet. That wasn’t what worried me, though. She’d left early this morning, as it was a long drive with the team to Silverstone. It said something about the current demands on my attention that I’d only realized an hour after she left where she was going and what that might mean. A call to Brex confirmed my suspicions. I’d reassigned him to watch over her, but somewhere along the lines the communications had failed. The left hand didn’t know what the right was doing.
“You’re telling me it’s a coincidence she went to see him?” I glanced at the clock, twisting my wedding band around my finger. How could he believe that?
“There is such a thing,” Norris said dryly. “You can stop checking the time. Brex told you they were held up.”
“The press conference ran late, I can accept that. What I can’t accept is that no one told me she was going to meet Anderson Stone.” My fist shot out, seeking relief for the energy building inside me. Norris caught it before it hit the wall.
“Do you want to explain to your wife why there’s a hole in the wall?” He released my fist and crossed his arms behind his back like he was now on official alert. That was probably best for me and my walls.
I pulled back, rubbing my fist in my palm. He had a point. Clara wouldn’t be happy to come home and discover I’d been punching things. What would I tell her when she asked why? I didn’t know what to say to her now.
“I can assure you that no one, outside of Brexton, knows there’s any relationship between you and Anderson Stone. I’ve seen to it.” There was no room to doubt him. Norris’s word was his vow, and he took his responsibility to me as seriously as anyone could.
I trusted Norris with my life and, more importantly, my family, but the last few years had taught me not to make assumptions. It had taken considerable effort to trace my father’s payments to Anderson’s mother. Was that why he believed no one would bother?
“So the first invitation to the Sovereign Games just happens to go to my father’s bastard son?” I asked.
Norris flinched slightly at the barb. I understood what he was on about. It wasn’t Anderson’s fault my father had kept this dirty secret for years. Anderson himself didn’t even know.
“If someone knew, the press would,” Norris said. He hadn’t budged from his spot by the door even as I continued to track across the room and back again.
“That’s comforting,” I muttered, rubbing my neck. I’d probably strained it checking the clock every other second.
“We were always going to have to contend with the fact that your brother is growing quite famous,” Norris began.
“Yes, we were,” I allowed. “I didn’t expect to send my wife to contend with it though.”
“May I ask…” he trailed off significantly.
I told Norris everything—eventually. It hadn’t seemed important until today that Clara wasn’t in on the particulars of this situation. “No, she doesn’t know. I mean, she knows I found out I have a brother. I didn’t think I needed to tell her who it was.”
Norris’s eyebrows shot up, but he did a good job rearranging his face back to a normal state as quickly as possible. “And why is that?”
“Are you my bodyguard or my therapist?” I snapped.
“Sometimes, it feels like I’m a bit of both,” he said evenly, and a wave of guilt swept over me. Norris didn’t dwell on the slight. “I think we’re dealing with an unusual set of circumstances and nothing more. There’s no intelligence to suggest that this is anything more than Anderson Stone, a rising star in the racing world, receiving an invitation from the crown to participate in an international charity event. You need to accept that.”
“And if I don’t?”
“Then I suggest you tell your wife the truth—the whole truth,” he amended quickly.
I sighed and crossed to the mantle, where a number of framed family portraits smiled back at me. Clara was in each one: holding Elizabeth, carrying a rose outside the London Eye, smiling next to a Christmas tree. She was the common denominator of not only the photos, but every memory I cherished. Hell, of every breath I took. But it wasn’t just Clara. It was a radiant, full-of-life Clara. I’d seen less and less of her over the last few weeks. It might even have been months. I tried to fool myself, writing off the change in her mood as early pregnancy. But that was a lie.
Edward said I was crushing her. Was that all I could offer her—a love that broke her? Every time I tried to trust that everything would be okay, life seemed to send me a warning sign.
I needed to know more about Anderson. I needed to know why he had been chosen. I’d heard he was a gifted racer. I’d been following his career since Brexton had uncovered who he was. Part of me had cheered him on, but I’d kept my distance. It was safer—for both of us. All of that cautious interest had vanished, replaced now by a creeping sense of dread. Nothing in my life was a coincidence; I had learned that the hard way.
“Maybe I should tell her,” I admitted, “but I need to know more first. I want you to look into this. Find out who’s in charge of the invitation list.”
Norris opened his mouth as if he was going to respond when Clara flew into the room, dropping her bag at the door.
Her cheeks were rosy, her neck still wrapped tightly in a scarf, and her perfect body hidden under too many layers for my taste. She rushed to me, throwing herself in my arms and kissing me hungrily. Pulling back, she let out a giggle when she saw that Norris was here.
“Oops! Sorry, Norris.” But she didn’t move away from my arms.
The tightness in my chest relaxed as I held her. I plucked her scarf, drawing it away from her face to discover it wasn’t just her cheeks that were glowing. She was luminous, lit from within with the happiness that I hadn’t seen for a long time.
“Today went well?” I couldn’t stop myself from checking my watch.
“I’m sorry. I know I’m later than I thought I would be. Belle and I were talking in the car. I should’ve called you.” Her explanations came out in a rush, and I realized this was what I had brought her to. She lived in a constant state of apology. I had known where she was. I was in contact with her security team. She had been having fun and that had changed the moment she came home to me.
“I knew when to expect you,” I told her. “Brex let me know.”
She peeked at that me through her full, black lashes hopefully. “Then you aren’t mad?”
“What would I have to be mad about?” I pulled her to me, wrapped an arm around her shoulders, and pressed a kiss to her forehead. Behind her, Norris didn’t say a word. He considered us a moment, an expectant look on his face. I shook my head slightly. Now wasn’t the time to tell her. I would. Later. I willed him to understand.
He tipped his head to indicate he’d gotten the message, but he didn’t look at me as he excused himself. “I’ll take my leave.”
Clara glanced over her shoulder as the door closed.
“I think I scared him off,” she whispered.
“He knows we need some alone time,” I said.
“You have been working awfully late,” she accused.
I couldn’t deny that any more than I could deny the possessive urge filtering into my blood now. I began unbuttoning her coat. She cooperated, her teeth sinking into her lower lip in expectation.
“Tell me about your day,” I said softly.
She understood the invitation, or she thought she did. There was no way she could know what I was really asking. “It was crazy. Belle is into cars and racing. I can’t even wrap my head around that,” she told me, “and it’s very loud. Oh, and I threw up in Anderson Stone’s helmet.”
“You did what?” It was the last thing I had expected her to say. The rosiness which had begun to fade from her cheeks flamed again reaching all the way to the tips of her ears.
She buried her face against my shoulder. “It was terrible. I didn’t want anyone to see me having morning sickness, but the bathroom was locked and he opened the door and…the next thing I know I’m throwing up in his helmet. It was very regal.”
I bit back a laugh. Clara worried so much about what people thought of her as Queen. I didn’t want her to think I was laughing at her.
“How did he react to that?”
“He was kind—a knight in shining armor. He offered to let me keep it in case I needed it again.” She sighed, burrowing deeper into me.
“He sounds thoughtful.” I tried to keep my voice even, but it lifted, betraying my apprehension. Was he really just a nice guy or did he know? I couldn’t imagine he appreciated his helmet being used as a toilet.
“I don’t think he’s going to be asking me for dinner.” She poked me in the side. “There’s no need to be jealous of the guy. I’m sure I made quite the impression on him.”
There was another matter to consider. “Does he know why you were sick?”
She nodded. “I know I shouldn’t have told him. I was kicking myself the whole way home for doing it. There was just something about him—it was like I could trust him.”
My heart stopped and I stared down at her for a moment. Confusion crept into her grey eyes and I pulled away, moving behind her to draw off her coat. I didn’t want her to see my reaction.
“X?” Too late.
This was my chance. It was time to come clean. My hands took her shoulders gently and spun her around, but the words didn’t come. I saw my chance slipping away. I watched it go.
I forced myself to say something to end the awkward pause. “Any man would be lucky to have you vomit in his helmet, Poppet.”
“Belle thinks he’s handsome,” she told me. She searched my face as if looking for a sign that she shouldn’t have told me this.
“And you?” I asked in a strangled voice.
“He’s cute. I think they were right to choose him as the face of the games,” she said.
“The face?” I repeated. I had no idea what that meant.
“They want someone young. Hot. Henry’s words, not mine,” she quickly added. “Speaking of which, is he…”
“I have no idea,” I said honestly. That was the least of my concerns. My wife had just described my secret, younger brother as hot. She had just told me that she trusted him with a secret we’d shared with very few people. Things were spinning out of control. It didn’t matter what Norris had said. Coincidence or not, I needed to take things in hand. “And you thought he was hot?”
“I can’t find another man attractive?” she asked testily.
An alarm went off in my head, but I ignored it. Maybe another man, but not that man. “I’d prefer you didn’t.”
“Oh, X.” She shook her head.
“I don’t find other women attractive.”
“Really?” Clara pressed, lifting an eyebrow.
“I don’t even notice them.”
“I think you’re jealous,” she said, her voice soft with amazement.
“Of some race car driver?” I swallowed on the truth of her accusation, turning away so she wouldn’t see it.
“That’s what I thought,” she said with a sigh. Her fingers tilted my chin, leveling my gaze back to hers. “How many times do I have to tell you that I belong to you, X?”
“I know.”
“Then act like it,” she said. There was a desperate edge to her voice.
I needed to fix this. Back us up a step. Change the subject.
Before I could do any of those things, she grabbed my tie. “Maybe I should show you,” she suggested.
I reached up, loosening the knot, and helped her slide it free. “I’ve heard actions speak louder than words, Poppet.”
“Then I’ll show you,” she promised.
I couldn’t tear my eyes from her as she lifted her shirt over her head. Her swollen breasts and pert nipples strained against the thin lace of her bra. She unhooked it and they fell free heavily. She took her time with her jeans, making certain she had my full attention before she pushed them to the ground along with her panties. I savored the sight of her body, the full curve of her hips, the subtle swell where my child grew.
She took a step toward me, holding out her arms and crossing them at the wrists. “Let’s play.”
My tongue darted over my lips, imagining it was her I was tasting. She always understood exactly what I needed. She hadn’t offered her submission to me for weeks. In fact, she’d turned the tables on me. I craved it now more than ever. “Not planning to top me tonight?”
“Sometimes I need to remind you of your place,” she said simply. She held her breath as I wrapped my tie around her wrists, drawing in a sharp breath when I knotted it tightly. “Sometimes I need to show you mine.”
She lowered herself on to her knees turning her face up expectantly. “You are my King. You are my master. Everything I am belongs to you.”
I knew what it cost her to say this to me now, after she had fought so hard to prove she could be independent. But that was the point. She could be independent. She chose when and where and how to give me control.
Fuck, she was beautiful.
“What do you want?” My hand fisted in her hair, pulling it back to raise her face. I stepped closer to her, removing the distance between my body and hers. Clara tugged slightly against my hold and pressed soft lips to the bulge growing in my pants. My cock, which had been keeping track of our conversation with interest, hardened painfully. Clara continued to press soft kisses through the fabric. “Is that what you want, Poppet?”
She nodded, not abandoning her devotion.
I let go of her hair and reached down to undo my buckle. I drew my belt off slowly and allowed it to fall to the floor. There was a time when she would have tensed at the movement. A time when she remembered what that strap of leather felt like on her bare ass. Now, she didn’t so much as blink. She trusted me, but I couldn’t help wondering if I had earned that trust.
“Is this what you want?” I slid a hand past the waistband of my pants, adjusting my shaft against the restrictive clothing.
“Yes, please.” She licked her lips invitingly. Her hands were tied, but she tried to reach up and tug my pants away.
“Patience,” I told her as I shoved them past my hips. My cock sprang free and I caught it in my fist, running my hand down the length of it. I stepped back just far enough she couldn’t reach me.
“Who do you belong to?” I asked in a low voice.
“You.” She stopped trying to move closer. She seemed to understand the silent instruction I was giving her. If she belonged to me, then she had to trust me. I continued to jack myself off—just the thought of her watching and wanting— getting me off.
“X,” she whispered. “Together.”
And there it was, her plea to me. It called me back to her.
I moved toward her, but I was no longer interested in watching her kneel before me. Instead, I kicked off my shoes and shucked off my pants in the process. Leaning down, I lifted her onto her feet.
“Together,” I repeated, catching the shell of her ear in my teeth and nipping it. I captured her mouth, kissing her languidly, exploring with my tongue while our bodies pressed urgently toward one another. Her tied hands found my cock and gripped it possessively.
“Together or nothing at all,” I told her, pulling free from her. Hooking one finger around the tie that bound her wrists I led her to the sofa, urging her toward its rolled arm. She sat gracefully on its edge, her legs spreading in invitation.
“Christ, you’re perfect,” I growled at the sight of her naked cunt.
“X, please. I need to feel you.”
I grabbed her hips, kneading them roughly before I flipped her around. My hand moved protectively to her stomach, as I bent her over the sofa’s arm. The tip of my cock slid along her seam and she moaned, half frustration, half pleasure.
“Shh, Poppet. I know what you need. I know what we need.” Holding her in place, I started to move inside her. She squirmed, trying to capture me. I smacked her ass lightly and she squirmed and moaned with pleasure.
“Do you like that?” I asked her roughly, smacking the other cheek, my cock twitching at her entrance.
“Yes, please,” she cried.
I smacked her ass cheek harder, this time leaving the red imprint of my palm. She writhed, circling her hips against my crown, but I held her steady.
“Why would you want to leave me?” I asked her, something dark overtaking me. I felt the shadows of my past all around me, and for once, I didn’t want to keep them at bay. I wanted to show her how far I was willing to go to prove that she belonged to me.
“I don’t,” she whispered and I spanked her again.
“You said he was cute. Hot,” I quoted her.
“X.” There was a warning in her voice now. She wanted to play, but she was beginning to suspect this was a different game than when she began.
I wrapped my hand around her hair and yanked her face up, twisting her at an awkward angle so that I could see it over her shoulder. “I need to know that no one will ever come between us.”
She stared at me, her eyes searching for a moment, but whatever darkness she found there, she didn’t close herself to it. Instead, she said softly, “No one. No one will ever come between us.”
I thrust inside her, abandoning my fear and losing myself to her. Releasing her hair, I wrapped both arms around her torso, holding her to me as I continued to pound deep inside her. A strangled cry of pleasure spilled from her lips. I bent my knees, allowing myself to move deeper, to fuck her harder. I slid a hand between her legs as her cries faded. They tried to close against me, her own climax shuddering to its conclusion. Forcing my fingers past her folds, I spread her sex open and rubbed her clit furiously as I continued to stroke inside her. Her breathing came in pants and fragments of words. I had no idea what she was trying to say to me. I didn’t care. I only wanted to feel her come again, to feel her clenching greedily around me, to feel her helpless in my arms. I lifted her into my arms, piercing her to the core and holding her captive. Her body tensed and my own responded, releasing inside her as she broke over me and then went limp in my arms.
I held her there, spent, my dick still pulsing inside her. Finally, after a minute—after an eternity—she whispered my name. I withdrew slowly, unsure what to expect when I faced her. She turned to me and held out her wrists. I untied them, my eyes never leaving hers and the questions reflecting there like a storm over the ocean. I had no answers to give her. I trusted Clara. I loved her. I was doing my goddamn best to be the man she deserved. When her hands were free, I braced myself. The last time I used her so completely, I thought I’d lost her forever. I deserved to.
But there was no slap. She didn’t walk away. Instead, her arms encircled my neck, her fingers knitting through my hair and pulling me down to meet her. I knew she had questions. I knew I needed to find the answers. For now, though, she offered me the protection of her kiss and I took it, finding safety there.