Already the second week of camp was turning out to be as much of a disaster as the first. The news that Mitchell the Unconnable was back was only one of the many reasons why Archie was beginning to think this was going to be the worst summer at Camp Shady Crook ever.
His biggest source of worry was, of course, Vivian. Because try as he might, he couldn’t get her to give up on being his partner, no matter what he did.
His first idea was to pick an outfit she would hate so much that she would rebel against working with him. Maybe she’d even try to get sent home. But, as much as she complained about the silly “normal camper costume,” once they started conning people with the new disguise, she seemed right in her element. They made fifteen dollars, just from that stupid candy bar, and by dinner she was almost cackling with how easy it had all been.
Which just made his job that much harder.
The next day he tried a new approach. “I’ve got a great idea for us to pull off,” he enthused during one of their secret meetings around the far side of Joyless Lake. They always kept a healthy distance from the old boathouse, since everyone knew it housed at least six nests of angry bees, but it was one of the few private places they could talk. “The only hard part is you need to get hit in the head with an oar.”
“What?”
“Not hard, or anything. Just a little tap.”
“I am not letting you hit me in the head with an oar!” she announced, loud enough that he gave her a pointed look and shook his head toward a group of campers canoeing not far from where they stood. No one was supposed to notice them talking. Not if they wanted to keep up the pretense of not being friends.
“Not me, someone else. Maybe that Peter kid from my bunk? He doesn’t look very strong.”
“This is a ridiculous conversation. I don’t even want to know why you think I should get hit in the head with an oar, because it’s not happening.”
Archie frowned. “But we could make a lot of money. . . .”
“Why don’t you get hit with an oar, then? And I’ll do whatever you were going to do?”
“That would never work,” he said, and pursed his lips. “What if it was someone from the Smallmouth Bass cabin that hit you? They’re all, like, nine years old. They can barely lift an oar, much less hurt anyone with one.”
“THINK OF SOMETHING ELSE, ARCHIE. NO OARS. AND ABSOLUTELY NO HEAD INJURIES.” She was yelling now, not caring that the kids in the distance might hear them.
“Well, what, then? You’re the one who wants me to tell you how to swindle people.” He paused. “Honestly, I just don’t get it.”
“Get what?”
“Any of it,” Archie said. “You live in Manhattan. Your parents sound, well, rich. At least to me. Why do you even care about getting five dollars from some random kid? Why does it even matter? You could just ask your parents for five dollars, I bet.”
“It’s not about the money,” Vivian said. “And you don’t know anything about me or my family—” She stopped for a moment, like she was almost going to say something else, but she just said. “Forget it.”
“Come on, if we’re going to work together, I really want to know.”
“I’m sure you do,” she said, with more force than he expected. “You’re just like everyone else, looking for an in, a way to get to me.”
For once Archie didn’t have anything to say.
“Here’s the thing,” Vivian said. “If I’ve learned anything, it’s that most people are terrible. You’re terrible. Oliver’s terrible. Miss Hiss is terrible. Did you know today I heard her refusing to give one of the little Brook Trouts a Band-Aid because they, and I quote, ‘don’t grow on trees?’ Face it, Archie, most people are just out for themselves. And if you give them the opportunity, then they’ll take you for a ride. If someone wants to take advantage of me, well, I’m going to get there first.”
“So you don’t trust people at all?”
She laughed. “Should I? Should I trust you? I see what happens when people trust you. You may be better at this kind of game, but everybody is playing it. Even if they say they’re not.”
Archie had never thought of it that way. He’d always seen his targets as wealthy innocents, ripe for the picking, but not as rivals playing their own games. He was Robin Hood, taking money from the rich and giving it to the poor—well, at least him and Oliver. And some of the scholarship kids. Even if sometimes he messed up a little bit. Like that kid Julian, from last week. He didn’t like to think about that. He made a mental note to send Julian some of the money he’d earned so far this summer. “But what makes you so sure you’re right?”
“I just know I’m right, trust me.” She laughed again. “Trust me, trust me, trust me. What a con artist should never say. That’s rule forty-two or something, right?”
Archie just shook his head. Already this girl was proving to be smarter than he’d ever expected. And, he hated to admit, more like him than he’d ever realized.
Which only made it even more important to eliminate her—or at least get her to lose interest in scams altogether. But he still had one more trick up his sleeve. And then he could maybe get rid of Cupcake Girl for good.
• • •
Once the second week was over and the hopeless cases, aka new campers, had turned up and taken their places in the dingy bunks, Archie met up with Vivian and Oliver under the trees near the lake to go over that week’s successes and failures.
“This was a great week, wasn’t it?” Vivian was gushing. “We made tons of money. I have to admit, that Flop scam really worked. Even with the stupid outfit.”
“We did pretty well,” Archie said with a smile. “Though I did a bit better last summer, I have to say. Fewer . . . distractions.”
“Okay,” Vivian said, looking at him warily. “Enough with the small talk. I know we made a lot of money this week. So where’s my cut?”
“Cut?” Archie said, the picture of innocence.
“My cut, my share!” Vivian snapped. “I worked all week on your little scam! I had kids knocking me into the dirt three times a day. I should get some of the money. You can’t tell me you’re going to take it all!”
“I’m not taking it all,” Archie said.
“Really?”
“I’m giving some to Oliver, of course.”
Oliver allowed himself a small smile but said nothing.
Vivian’s voice got louder. “So Oliver gets paid and I don’t?”
“Oliver does a lot more than you know,” Archie said brightly. “Trust me, I keep careful records.”
“Oliver serves mystery meat and pushes third graders into the lake when they don’t walk fast enough to swim lessons,” Vivian shot back. “I’m the one who has been working day in and day out, making money. For all of us.”
“Well, that was the deal. You wanted to be my partner and learn, and so I’ve been teaching you,” Archie said. “Nobody ever said anything about you getting paid. If you don’t like it, why don’t you get yourself kicked out and go home? That’s what you were hoping to do from the beginning, right?”
“I have my sources.” He didn’t really know what she’d been planning—he was just guessing, but from the expression on her face, he suspected he’d guessed right.
“Well, I can’t go home. My parents are in China. Like it or not, you’re stuck with me. So hand over my share of the cash.”
“No,” he said, his eyes defiant. He knew how unhappy she’d be once he refused to share the bounty with her. But would she be unhappy enough to walk off and quit? That’s what he was hoping.
“Well, then—”
“Then what?” he interjected. “You’ll tell on us? That’ll mean telling Miss Hiss everything you’ve been doing the past two weeks. You’ll be sent home in five seconds. I’m sure your parents will be so pleased when they find out they have to come all the way back from China just because you got kicked out of camp.”
He watched as Vivian gritted her teeth. “That’s it,” she said, her voice shaking with barely contained rage. “I’m not doing this anymore.”
“Not doing what anymore?”
“Not being your little performing monkey! For no money! This is not what I signed up for, Archie Drake!”
Archie gave her a placid smile. “Well, fine, if that’s what you want. But you know the bargain. You either work with me or you don’t work at all. So no more cons for the rest of the summer.”
“Are you kidding me? I never agreed to that.” She paced back and forth. “I can do whatever I want. You can’t stop me.”
“Come on, Vivian!” Archie said, a crack showing in his usual calm demeanor. “In four weeks you’ll have all of New York City at your feet, all thanks to me and what I’ve taught you. All I’m asking is you leave Camp Shady Crook to me! This place isn’t big enough for two con artists. You know that.”
“Nope,” she said, and gave him that smug smile he hated with the fire of thousand suns. He could tell there was no way she was giving up now.
Archie’s mind veered wildly. Obviously his secret plot hadn’t worked. He’d tried to humiliate her, tried to get her to give up. But he’d underestimated her. A mistake he wouldn’t make again, he was sure of it.
He frowned, and finally spoke. “How about this—how about a little . . . bet.”
She cocked her head to one side. “What kind of bet?”
“A con bet, of course. It’s simple. The first person to get the money wins.”
“Wins what?”
“Camp Shady Crook, of course,” he said. “And all the opportunities that come with it.”
“Okay . . . fine. I’ll take the bet. Only because I know I’m going to win,” she said. Finally, an opportunity to really take over from Archie, and show she was worth being in charge, even if it was just of a stupid summer camp. “So, who’s the mark, mastermind?”
Archie thought again, and a slow smile spread across his face. “How about—Sasha?”