SAM
If I hadn’t had such an intense day, I would have gone straight home to see Mara. But instead I got off the Tube early, telling myself I needed a drink at the Cock & Bull. Of course I could have had a drink at my local in Queen’s Park or picked up a bottle on the way home. But it had to be at the Cock, I told myself sternly.
Sure it does, my voice of reason snapped back. And you’re not hoping to check up on him or anything.
I ignored it and entered the pub with my head held high. I spotted him almost immediately, my heart doing a little flip, but I pretended not to see him and walked coolly to the bar.
Ooooh look, here he is before you for a change. When he’s not expecting you. Interesting.
Shut up.
From the corner of one eye, I saw he was with a couple of men, who were all braying and doing an awful lot of backslapping. My stomach untwisted a little. So far, so good. After my disturbing day working with Lucy I had prepared myself for seeing him with another woman.
The bar was busy and I had to wait for service but I doggedly avoided looking his way. I concentrated on making my lips look ever so slightly pouty, in what I desperately hoped was a natural-looking way, and waited for him to notice me.
I smiled at the barman. ‘A pint of Ringwood please.’
I hadn’t thought through what I would have done if he’d been with a woman. Make a scene? Leave straightaway? I took a sip of my ale and turned slightly away from the bar, still studying my phone. The full liquid slid down my throat. After all, this was why I was here at the bar – I had to admit it to myself. I was checking up on him. But! I took another self-conscious sip. I was also a sophisticated, grown-up woman, completely at ease with my own company. I must remember that.
I was halfway through my pint when he finally came over. I was getting worried – would I have to take more direct action? I hoped not. I was fairly sure a sophisticated femme fatale wouldn’t actually have to bump into the object of desire. He would be drawn to me, his senses overriding his brain . . .
‘Saaaaaaam’ – kiss, kiss – ‘how lovely to see you, what are you doing here?’ He seemed pleased to see me.
‘Oh!’ – surprised face – ‘Hello, Charlie. I’m good, thanks. I was just passing, popped in for a vino. Well’ – I lifted my glass and looked at it, widened my eyes in a goofy self-parody – ‘you know what I mean.’ And I laughed a suitably grating hee-haw laugh to add to the goofiness.
That went well.
Charlie chuckled politely with me.
I tried again. ‘Had a huge day. Actually’ – like I just remembered – ‘I spent the day with Lucy.’
Charlie’s usual composure fell off his face momentarily and he hastily replaced his smile to cover his shock.
‘Why would you want to do a thing like that?’
‘I was working with her.’ And there it was again, a flicker of shock across his face, plus confusion.
‘Working with her? I . . . don’t understand.’
‘She acted in a commercial I was working on.’
‘Acted?’ Charlie squinted in concentration and then his brow cleared. ‘Oh, she’s actually doing it. I remember her wittering on once about earning some extra money doing TV stuff. I thought it was all pie in the sky. I hope they didn’t get her to talk. She was an extra, was she?’
‘She was the presenter.’ I didn’t like his tone.
‘Christ – really?’ he spluttered into his lager.
‘She was playing a doctor, talking about the benefits of . . . a product . . .’ How much should I say? Oh fuck it. ‘She was advertising a drug that helps with erectile dysfunction.’
‘Oh that I must see.’ Charlie shook his handsome head and then took another sip, finishing his glass.
‘Another?’
‘Why not, I think I’ve got time. I can’t stay for long though, I’ve got somewhere else to be soon,’ I said, hoping like hell that sounded like the truth.
Charlie grinned at me and leant over the bar to order the drinks.
‘So have you had a busy week?’ I asked him, feeling more confident with most of a drink on board.
‘I suppose I have, you?’
‘It’s just that you haven’t been in touch so I guessed you were flat out,’ I said lightly, tilting my head to one side, the way I’d seen Drew Barrymore do in 50 First Dates, trying for a gosh-aren’t-you-cute-but-I’ll-forget-about-you-tomorrow delivery. Not where-the-hell-have-you-been-don’t-you-care-any more voice. Not that – a million cute miles away from that.
Charlie eyed me for a moment as if he was double-checking my intent. ‘Well, I have been pretty busy, you’re right.’
I lifted one shoulder and let it drop. ‘I don’t mind, I’ve been busy too. Visiting Mara a lot.’ After playing cute, there was always guilt tripping.
‘I’m so sorry, I should have asked. How is she?’
‘She came home yesterday actually. She’s going to be fine. Her collarbone will take a while to heal but everything else is fine. I think she’ll take a while to get another bike though, her confidence is pretty dented.’ As I spoke, Charlie made a discreet investigation of his watch. Which reminded me: I was busy I’d better leave.
‘Anyway I’ve got to get going, I haven’t seen her all day.’
‘OK.’
‘You don’t seem upset I’m leaving.’
Damn, that was too much.
‘Of course I am, babe,’ Charlie said smoothly, running a finger along my jaw.
‘You’re not seeing someone else, are you?’ There, I’d said it. No taking it back. I studied his face. His eyes widened with . . . surprise? Denial? Acknowledgement?
‘What makes you say that?’
‘I don’t know, sorry, it’s my big day talking, I’d better get home.’ I started bustling about locating my handbag and shucking on my coat, wishing I could keep my feelings to myself for once.
Then I felt my hands being caught by his insistent fingers.
‘I love the times we have together, babe.’
OK, that was present tense – I could work with that. But was there a but?
‘And you have nothing to worry about.’ He cupped both hands around my face and drew it towards him for a kiss.