Chapter 4 - Slumber party

For the first time in a very long time, Darren found himself questioning whether or not going to bed with someone had been the right choice.

Returning to bed after his illicit romp with Carson, Darren laid awake for far too long, especially considering he'd just gotten off. He should have questioned Carson's reply in the moment. He should have stopped himself, but they'd already snuck out, and he'd been blue-balling for Carson for almost two days straight, and he'd been the one to issue the invitation and...

He managed to catch Asha the next morning as they were getting dressed and mic'd up, thank god. "Hey... can I do confessionals with Quinn today?" he asked quietly, and despite raising her eyebrows questioningly, she nodded.

"Does anyone other than your sister know that I'm here under false pretenses?"

Off camera, a second male voice can be heard faintly. "Darren, this is a reality TV competition. Do you really think that every single person came here because they expect to find true love?"

"Yes? No? I don't know. But at least they - " Darren stops as if catching himself, and for a moment his gaze focuses directly into the lens with a flash of deep irritation.

The faint off-screen voice continues. "Are you worried about the consequences of you and Carson sneaking around last night?"

Darren's lips press together tightly, and he swallows visibly. "...not for me. But he's in here for real. Carson really wants.... I just...." he rakes a hand through his hair and keeps his face lowered, shoulders slumping. It sounds like speaking is taking every ounce of willpower. "I like him."

"Darren, listen." Quinn had paused with him before opening the door to the confessional, wrapping one arm around his shoulders. "It's okay to like him. It's okay if there's something there. I know this is reality TV, but it's not completely fake and orchestrated. It doesn't matter how you got here or why, it just matters what you both feel. Just go with it, just let it happen. That's kind of the magic of this place."

It was hard to look at Carson and not feel like there was something magical at work. He'd been so amazing to spend time with, so kind, so entirely into him and - god, so fucking hot - and it was becoming harder and harder for Darren to stop thinking that he didn't deserve any of it.

They spent the afternoon in ridiculous games and team activities, split into daddies and himbos. "We'll be mixing things up again tomorrow by welcoming a new Daddy into the house," Freya said with a smile as she kicked things off after lunch. "And I know you all want a little more quality time together before things get crazy. So, for every objective both teams earn this afternoon, you'll get an extra hour together to extend tonight's slumber party past midnight."

A night together. Even with the shared accommodations, Darren knew that Things Had Happened during season one. Had the last season done this so early? It felt strange to have unofficial permission to fool around, and he couldn't help but wonder if it had anything to do with his sneaking around with Carson, which Quinn had somehow known about.

Part of him was very tempted to throw the activities in a last ditch attempt to keep from getting any more in over his head. The rest of him wanted it too much to care.

"Really looking forward to being able to cuddle all night," Carson murmured when they met up for dinner, because of course they'd earned the entire overnight.

Darren smiled, despite - or because of? - the butterflies in the pit of his stomach, and kissed him. "Me too." When he was with Carson it was nearly impossible to think about anything else, and not just because he was hot as hell. The more time Darren spent with him the harder it was to deny that he liked Carson for so much more than his hot body. He'd half-hoped that their illicit rendezvous the night before would help him think about the situation more clearly, but somehow it just made it even more obvious how great Carson was in non-sexy ways. Even as some of the other pairs joked and threw around innuendos during dinner, Carson remained so unassumingly sweet with him: cuddly, affectionate, but not handsy. Delightfully possessive but not controlling. Listening to what he had to say. Looking at him like he was an amazing, rare thing.

And Darren found himself aching, torn between wanting to fall forever and terrified of that fall.

They changed for the slumber party. Darren regarded the silky emerald green pajamas that matched the robe he'd brought and his underwear options, and went commando.

He almost wished he was allowed to get drunk, but surprisingly a few glasses of wine over the course of the evening calmed his nerves perhaps more effectively. It was nice to hang out and mostly be able to ignore the cameras, visiting with other contestants and playing pool or board games or chatting around the outdoor fire pit.

Carson kissed his forehead as the night grew late, stroking his fingers idly through his hair as Darren curled up against his side on the patio. "Tired, darling?"

"I'm okay," Darren replied, nuzzling a kiss to his neck. "Just enjoying being close. Looking forward to bedtime."

Carson gave a soft hum in agreement, silent for a moment. "If you... if it gets uncomfortable... let me know, alright? The beds are pretty small. If you need to sleep on your own I won't be offended...."

His gaze was so earnest when Darren lifted his head to look up at him, almost worried. It was impossible not to melt. Darren kissed him warmly. "I will. I promise. You too, okay?"

Carson smiled and nodded, arm tightening around him as he claimed a longer kiss. "Promise."

It was more impossible not to melt into his embrace when they finally climbed into bed, cuddling close and listening to the house shut down. Other than Blythe and Ryland, they'd ended up as the only couple in the DILF bedroom, which was a relief. Even if every bed had been full Darren didn't think he'd have been able to resist the urge to be close to Carson, especially sharing a single, but he didn't particularly want an audience of the entire house.

Carson curled against his back, wrapping his arms around him under the quilt and nuzzling a kiss to the back of his neck. "Gonna be enough room for you?"

Darren hummed a soft affirmation, cuddling back into the warmth of his body. It was hard to think about anything else but how good it felt to be close, to cuddle with no eyes on them, no one else around except another couple that was very obviously not paying them any attention. "Long as you don't mind sleeping close," he murmured, reaching back to stroke Carson's cotton-covered hip and the bare skin above it.

Carson gave a little pleased noise, breath warm on his skin. He rested one hand fully on his ribs, fingers caressing slow, idle circles over the silk. "I like being close to you... been so good spending time with you the past few days... getting to know you...."

It felt far longer than a few days, and yet somehow hardly any time at all, and Darren's heart fluttered disobediently. Instead of dwelling on it, he twisted back towards him enough to claim Carson's mouth with his own.

Carson's lips parted to his with a low, barely audible groan, arms tightening briefly around him as he returned Darren's kiss. His fingers splayed on Darren's chest and stomach, and as their kisses grew longer he began to stroke slowly up and down his torso, sliding warm and effortless over the silken fabric. Carson tightened the arm underneath him, holding him close, and found one of his nipples through the thin satin, teasing and rubbing and pinching lightly in a way that went straight to Darren's cock and left him surprisingly breathless. The other hand continued his slow exploration, tracing long lines over his body and leaving heat in its wake. Stroking his stomach, his thighs, all the while staying clear of what was now his incredibly hard cock until Darren was trying to squirm into his touch, trembling in his embrace, breath ragged against his lips.

Perhaps he could have held out if it hadn't felt so good to have Carson pressed against his back. It was too easy to shift until the hard length of his erection pressed between his ass cheeks, too easy to grind back against him. "Please," he breathed finally, and Carson stole the word with kisses, finally curling his hand over Darren's cock through his pajama bottoms.

It felt so good that Darren barely managed to hold back a moan, biting down on his bottom lip as he rocked between his touch and the exquisite hardness of his cock. It took a half second to register Carson's whisper against his ear. "This alright?"

"Yeah," Darren whispered back, ragged, aching for more. He reached back between them, glad Carson had prudently stripped down to his boxer-briefs, and tugged his cock free, guiding it between his thighs.

The way it made Carson's hips stutter against him was extremely gratifying. "Oh fuck," he gasped, breath catching as he gave a slow, deliberate thrust. He let go of Darren's cock briefly to stroke hungrily along his thigh, fingers digging into his hip, and even though Darren had told himself firmly that he wasn't going to push the question of sex, the girth of Carson's cock between his thighs and rubbing over his balls was quickly making that much less of a decision.

"More?" he whispered, and Carson slipped a hand easily down into his loose pajamas - Darren had bought a size up for ease of access - taking him in hand. Carson sighed in pleasure, lavishing kisses to the side of his neck as he explored his cock: curling his fingers around him to stroke slowly up and down his length, rubbing his foreskin along his shaft, then focusing on caressing the head with his thumb, stroking Darren's arousal over the sensitive tip. At the same time he started to rock between his thighs ever so slightly, grinding his exquisite cock up along the sensitive place behind his balls.

"Getting you off last night was so hot," Carson whispered, breath hot against his skin. "Loved having you in my lap... loved feeling you spill in my fingers...."

Darren bit back a whine and tried to resist the urge to squirm back against him. He twisted back to claim Carson's mouth again, trying to focus on his kisses and not his cock, trying to think about anything else but....

"I want you so bad," he breathed helplessly, and Carson gave a soft, reassuring hum against his mouth.

Anything. God, it would be so easy. He wouldn't even have to move. And despite how good it felt to have Carson's fingers wrapped around his cock, it was becoming increasingly impossible to deny that it wasn't what he wanted, and that he might very quickly end up too frustrated to get off like this.

He grabbed Carson's hip again, pulling him closer, breath catching in his throat as he rolled back against him. "Carson...."

Carson ran his fingers slowly down the length of his cock from root to tip. "You okay?"

"I...." Darren bit his lip, torn. Then he extracted one of the blister packs of lube he'd grabbed earlier from the breast pocket of pajama top, tugging Carson's hand from his pants and pressing it into his fingers. "...please?"

For a moment Carson didn't answer, but the way that he shifted against him was undeniably approving. "...not sure we can keep that on the downlow...."

"I can be quiet," Darren promised, grinding back against his cock despite himself. "Promise. And they're already fucking anyway...." He hadn't been specifically paying attention, but Blythe and Ryland were at the moment being much less quiet about their sleepover activities.

"Fuck...." Carson caught his mouth, heated and needy, sucking hard at his bottom lip. At the same time he started to ease Darren's pajama bottoms down his hips, and Darren arched off the bed to help him. "You sure about this, Dare?"

"Please," Darren whispered again, and soon Carson was stroking slick fingers over his hole, carefully pressing up into him.

It took more willpower than he'd anticipated to keep from moaning at how good it felt. Darren was definitely no stranger to casual sex, but for quite a while there'd been a dearth of tops in the circles he'd been spending time in. It had been long enough that he hadn't realized how much he'd missed it. Surely that's why he felt so desperate for it now, from Carson. Surely....

"God, you're so tight," Carson breathed, working what felt like a third finger up into him. "Should I get you off like this?"

"I'm - I'm good - " Darren managed to answer, holding back a whine but unable to keep himself from trembling with it. "I can take you. Please...."

"Shhh..." Carson soothed, kissing him again. Kissing long and deep as he pumped his fingers in him slowly until Darren had calmed enough to breathe again. "You sure, sweetheart?"

Carson's arm tightened briefly around his waist as if to reassure him. Then he eased his fingers away, and soon the tip of his thick cock pressed slick against him, rocking gently, seeking entrance. "Tell me when it's too much...."

Darren bit his lip to hold back a moan, closing his eyes entirely to the shivering intensity of penetration. More than anything he wanted to push back onto him, to impale himself and fill himself with Carson's exquisite cock no matter any discomfort it might initially bring. But he was big, or Darren was tighter than he'd anticipated, and Carson seemed determined to keep control, holding him still in the bed. He rocked against him with almost agonizing slowness, but he didn't hold back, and soon Darren relaxed into being taken, stretching tight around his cock as Carson eased inside him.

Darren grabbed for his hip partly to anchor himself through the intensity and partly to take control. All he could feel was Carson: hands rubbing hungrily over the length of his body, breath rough and hot against his neck. The slow roll of his hips and that incredible cock. He couldn't help but rock back against him, making Carson's cock push deeper, splitting him open, so much more stimulation than he'd imagined and so, so good. Darren fought to keep from crying out, each breath catching in his throat, shuddering with each rush of sensation. It was so much, too good, and suddenly, as he pushed Carson's cock to the hilt, the depth and intensity of pleasure overwhelmed him completely, and he was coming apart on his cock before he could stop himself.

"God yes," he heard Carson gasp, holding him close. Stilling deep inside him but curling a hand around his cock, stroking him gently. "Come for me, sweetheart, you feel so good...."

"Fuck," Darren whimpered, overwhelmed and incredulous, trying to catch his breath. "Oh god. I didn't mean...."

"Shhh," Carson soothed again, kissing his earlobe, voice a low rumble. "It's okay. We're all good. Just let me - "

"Don't." Darren grabbed his hip tightly before he could move. The intensity of his cock was overwhelming in a very different way post orgasm, but bearable if he was still, and the thought of stopping.... He twisted back to kiss him until he could breathe again. "Don't stop," he breathed. "Just give me a moment... still wanna feel you come inside me...."

Carson drew a sharp hiss against his lips, and Darren could feel the shudder that ran through him. He held still, though, letting out a long, slow breath. Then he managed a soft hum of agreement, returning to slow, sweet kisses as he began to caress the length of his body again, slow and appreciative.

"So good being inside you...." he murmured, fingers tracing the line of his hipbone. "Could stay here all night...."

Darren nearly moaned at the idea. "... that sounds fucking decadent...." he sucked at Carson's bottom lip, rubbing back over as much of his hip and ass as he could reach and enjoying the strength of his body. "Want me to be your little cock-warmer?"

Carson gave a soundless, surprised laugh, nipping teasingly. "...if it feels good for you, sweetheart."

Darren shifted on his cock slightly in reply, sighing at how unexpectedly good it felt. Not stimulating in the way that made him crave escalation, though he was pretty sure he could get back to that. But deeply pleasing, like a massage, or lazily stroking oneself after orgasm. "Feels so good," he sighed. "Feels incredible...."

Carson let out a shuddering sigh as Darren ground back slowly against him, clearly happy to let Darren take the lead. "...feels pretty fucking incredible on this end too... god, you take my cock so good, sweetheart... so fucking deep... sure you're okay?"

Darren nodded silently, rubbing his hip in reassurance, and let himself sink into a sea of pleasure.

He was vaguely aware of the other two finishing, which might have made him feel self-conscious if he didn't already feel so good. Carson cuddled around him, lavishing slow kisses and gentle touch to his skin, and Darren could let himself imagine that anyone looking on would hardly even wonder if they were fucking at all.

There was something almost dreamlike about it; drowsily Darren imagined spending the entire night like this. Rocking together in near silence, letting sensation build slowly with orgasm a distant, unurgent promise. It felt like nothing existed except for Carson, and he gave himself over to it completely as the world around them grew still, silent apart from quiet snores.

His own desire returned soon enough, as Carson's caresses grew hungrier, starting to rock with him with increasing urgency. Or perhaps it was his lover's need that fueled his own; the thought of making Carson spill inside him was nearly too exquisite to bear. His fingers dug into Carson's hip, encouraging more, and then nothing existed but the snap of his hips, fucking hot shocks of pleasure through him, and the desperate need to be quiet. Forcing himself to breathe through it as his lover stuttered deep, spilling hot and slick, a last few stuttered thrusts and his hand on Darren's cock pulling him with him to climax.

At some point in the night he woke, reluctantly extracting himself from Carson's arms to go pee. Ryland was still snoring on his return, half on top of Blythe and dressed in Blythe's robe and probably nothing else.

Carson, half awake, smiled up at him warm and dreamy, pulling back the covers and opening his arms to him. He looked exquisitely debauched, half-hard with his cock still out. His gaze darkened as Darren silently let his pajama pants fall to the floor. "What are you doing....?"

Darren glanced back at the snoring pair, then pulled the other blister pack of lube from his shirt pocket, straddling his hips before pulling the covers over them both. "Putting you back to sleep," he breathed with a grin, and proceeded to ride his cock until orgasm sent them back to dreamland cuddled in each other's arms.

The room was starting to lighten when Darren awoke to movement. It took a moment for him to place where he was, then realize that what had woken him was one of the other daddies, Alain, standing at the bed across from theirs, going through a small suitcase.

They were safely enclosed by the quilt, though Darren suddenly remembered his pajama bottoms on the floor, heart beating faster. Could he grab them before Alain noticed? Would it draw even more attention if he tried?

Silently he freed one leg from under the quilt, shifting until he could reach the floor with his foot and carefully feel for the softness of the fabric.

Alain straightened, turning with a pair of swim trunks in his hand. His eyes moved to Darren's foot, then crinkled in good humor as he grinned down at him. "Don't worry, darling," he said softly. "You still have an hour to get decent before the crew shows up. I'm just going for a swim, so don't mind me."

Carson made a sleepy, questioning noise as Alain left, arms tightening around him, and Darren closed his eyes and cuddled back into him. It felt so good, so warm and safe... like nothing else in the world mattered as long as he was here, in Carson's embrace....

He turned his face back for sleepy kisses, melting into the idle caress of Carson's hands on his body. Into touch that quickly became less idle, kisses more yearning, until Darren couldn't resist the urge to reach back and guide Carson's cock into him again. He didn't think they were quite as successful at staying quiet, but it didn't matter. Nothing was more important than losing himself entirely to the incredible man at his side.

"Thank you so much for this," Carson murmured as they cuddled together afterwards, limbs tangled together. His eyes traced Darren's features in the growing light of morning, fingers caressing his jaw, stroking through his hair. "It's... been a really long time since... since I haven't felt like I had to pretend with someone, or hold myself back, or.... It's so good, being with you, Dare. The way I feel about you...."

Darren swallowed hard against the rush of emotions Carson's words awoke, achingly good and unexpectedly terrifying. Let it happen, Quinn had said. He nodded, pressing a trembling kiss to Carson's mouth, and despite being terrified that it was the wrong thing to do, he couldn't help but respond. "I feel the same way."

Despite not wanting to leave Carson's arms, Darren prudently recovered the other half of his pajamas and left for the Himbos' Bedroom as the house began to stir. Both Ryland and Blythe were snoring as he left. Alain was still off swimming, though Tydall had returned at some point and was fast asleep.

The shower in their bathroom was running, but turned off as he passed. That was probably a very good idea, Darren thought, so he slipped into the bedroom as quietly as he could, taking his suitcase from under the bed and starting to gather his things.

Wes slept alone on his bed in the gabled nook. Next to Darren's bed, Trevor had pushed his and Ryland's beds together, though Stephen slept in his pajamas on top of the covers next to him. He stirred as Zhehan returned, stretching, sitting up and taking stock of the room before leaning over to press a soft kiss to Trevor's temple that to Darren read far more polite than passionate. Then he left silently, nodding to him on the way out.

One of the PA's, Nayah, was waiting for him with a mic when he got out of the shower, and Darren thanked her distractedly. "They're waiting for you," she said, nodding towards the bedroom. "Can you go ask the others how their night was?"

And open myself up to the same question. Darren nodded despite his unease. He'd committed to do this, after all.

The beds were all made and straightened in the room, his fellow contestants in various stages of fussing over their toilette, though Ryland was stretched out on top of his bed dozing. Darren gave them all a warm smile. "Morning. How were things in here last night?"

Zhehan looked up from brushing out his impressively long dark hair. "Good. It was nice to snuggle. I heard things got a bit hot and heavy in daddy land?"

Darren tried to smile winningly, shrugging. "I mean, I wasn't intentionally paying attention to the others, and I don't kiss and tell."

It was easy to remember how he'd found him and Stephen earlier. Darren gave Trevor what he hoped was a sympathetic smile, sitting down on the bed next to him. "It's not a bad thing to take things slow, you know. Stephen seems to really like you."

Trevor's lips pursed in annoyance, and he gave a shrug. "I don't know. Don't think there's really a spark there, you know? Maybe I'll have better luck with whatever new Daddy shows up today."

Perched on the end of his bed in the eaves, Wes looked over sharply. "You can't give up on Stephen."

"I..." Wes flushed darkly, visibly fighting for words. "He's been so nice to you. He doesn't deserve to be led on."

"Love doesn't always mean you have to jump into bed right away," Zhehan pointed out, and Trevor snorted.

Zhehan froze, going a little pale. He opened his mouth, then closed it again, giving a quick shake of his head.

Nayah had slipped in next to the cameraman, and cleared her throat softly as the conversation came to a standstill. "Trevor," she said quietly, "you should tell Wes what you saw last night."

Trevor, still looking annoyed, but shrugged. "Wes, did you wake up when Alain left last night with Zhehan and Tydall?"

Darren didn't miss that Zhehan wouldn't quite meet his gaze. "It's not what you think."

The handsome, long-haired man swallowed. "... Tydall and I needed to... talk through something. Alain offered to help."

"It sure didn't sound like talking," Trevor replied sourly, and Zhehan glared at him.

"Stephen is not hot for me!" Wes exclaimed, going red. "How dare - that's not appropriate for you to say!"

"...maybe someone should just ask Stephen what he thinks?" Darren offered weakly, despite a niggling thought in the back of his head that he was probably being too sensible for a himbo. "Trevor, does he know you want to sleep with him?"

"I don't want to sleep with him," Trevor shot back, flushing. "Not all of us need to use sex just to secure their spot in the competition!"

Darren's stomach twisted, remembering all too well Carson's words that morning, and the look in his eyes. "...it's not like that with us," he said, but even as the words passed his lips his anxieties from the day before came back to play. It was supposed to be like that. You're not here for the reason Carson is. He's here to find love and you're here for a gig....

"I'm not mad about it," Trevor replied, despite his gaze and body language saying otherwise. "You saw an opportunity and you took it. So did Ryland. I just have more respect for my daddy than to assume he won't fall in love with me if I'm not putting out."

"Hey, it's not wrong to make sure you're sexually compatible," Ryland argued from the bed.

"And which of our daddies are you compatible with?" Wes asked quietly, looking even more hurt.

For a long, increasingly uncomfortable moment, Zhehan was silent. Then he turned to Nayah. "I'd prefer to talk about this in confessional, please."

Trevor rolled his eyes. "Oh come on, Wes. Alain's not the Daddy you care about."

"Hey!" Ryland sat up finally, irritated. "You're all fucking hangry right now, and you're making me hangry. Let's eat. And then you can, like, actually talk to your daddies? If you're really here because you honestly want to find love, nobody's going to fault you if you need to make a connection based on more than just picking somebody's underwear." Then he left for the kitchen, and, thank god, Nayah gave them all permission to follow.

If you're really here because you honestly want to find love.... Darren tried to push away his uncertainties through breakfast, tried to smile reassuringly in answer to Carson's little worried looks. But it was hard. At the end of the day, Darren wasn't here honestly. Could he really expect something real to come from that? Would Carson forgive him if he found out? And even if he did....

The thoughts ran through his mind over and over as they were brought into the main room, separated into their two groups on the couches, which had been split apart into two separate sectionals. He could hardly pay attention to what Freya was saying, or the new Daddy she introduced to them. Each time his train of thought restarted it became harder to argue against it, harder to ignore that Carson had come to him with earnest honesty and Darren hadn't. Darren had misled him, he'd lied to him from the beginning -

Zhehan's breathless declaration pulled Darren's attention back to the moment... and the handsome new Daddy that stood with Freya. He looked surprisingly young, though Darren had always found it a bit hard to tell with Asian men. His neatly kept mustache did give him a bit of a daddy look, at least.

"Oooh," Freya said with a smile. "Switching things up with the new daddy. Ryland, who would you like to date?"

"I'll stick with Blythe," Ryland purred, still eyefucking his date from across the room.

Wes was perched half curled in on himself on the couch, and was stalwartly avoiding Alain's gaze. "I... think I'd like to get to know Tydall today."

Carson. Carson, his heart said, but everything he'd been thinking about came to a head in a rush of terror.

For a moment there was silence. Freya stared back at him, openly flabbergasted. "...are you sure, Darren?"

Darren didn't have to look to feel the wave of hurt and confusion from Carson. He swallowed hard. "...yes."

	Day 1	Day 2	Day 3	Day 4	Day 5
Darren	Carson	Carson	Carson	Carson	Alain
Carson	Darren	Darren	Darren	Darren	Trevor
Wes	Alain	Alain	Alain	Alain	Tydall
Alain	Wes	Wes	Wes	Wes	Darren
Trevor	Tydall	Stephen	Stephen	Stephen	Carson
Tydall	Trevor	Zhehan	Zhehan	Zhehan	Wes
Zhehan	Stephen	Tydall	Tydall	Tydall	Xiang
Stephen	Zhehan	Trevor	Trevor	Trevor	(spare)
Blythe	Luiz	Ryland	Ryland	Ryland	Ryland
Ryland		Blythe	Blythe	Blythe	Blythe
Xiang					Zhehan
Luiz	Blythe	(spare)	—————————(eliminated)