Chapter Four

 

 

 

Jason opened the door to her apartment and waved her through. Cara smelled the food before she saw it. Inside, he had an elegantly set table and a meal waiting. “I hope you don’t mind. I texted Chelsea.”

She imagined her friend had been more than giddy to help him out. Then it dawned on her—the mysterious text as she was leaving. The sneaks. “I don’t.” Cara could see the all the hallmarks of her friend’s involvement. She knew Chelsea wouldn’t hesitate if she thought she was doing the right thing. “Should I be worried that you two are plotting together?”

“She just mentioned something about knowing how to soothe you with good food and wine. I just want to talk.” He plucked at his soaked shirt. “But first a shower?”

Cara ignored his suggestive glance. “Alone. Take the guest bath and I’ll meet you back here. Ten minutes?”

“More than enough.”

She was showered and dressed in jeans and a T-shirt with time to spare. Now warm and dry, she realized the seething knot of apprehension had been quickly being replaced by butterflies. Were they going to work this out right now? Like a business deal?

Why not?

Why did she suddenly feel like she needed note cards?

With a deep breath, Cara walked back out to find Jason already waiting with two glasses of wine. He handed her one with a small smile. “You’re freaking out.”

She knew it was useless to deny it, but she did anyway. “I’m fine.” She could see in his eyes that he didn’t believe her.

“Hungry?”

Not exactly. “Sure. I’d hate for any of this to go to waste.”

He pulled out the chair for her and rounded the table to sit. “You don’t sound too enthusiastic.”

“Sorry.” Cara figured it was time just to lay it all out.

He waved away her apology. “You know what I’m thinking. I want to know what’s going on in your head.”

“Straight to the point, huh?” Cara took a fortifying sip before sliding the glass of wine away. “Okay. You know how I feel. I like what we have and I don’t want to screw it up.”

“And you think that if we take things further, we’ll ruin it.”

“You don’t think that it can happen? I’ve had friends who had amazing relationships and I saw them fall apart. The ugliness and bitterness that came with it changed them.” Chelsea’s relationship fiasco was the latest that came to mind. She and Richard had seemed to be the perfect couple, right up until the night before their wedding and the text he’d sent her explaining that he couldn’t marry her because he didn’t feel as though they loved each other enough. To Chelsea’s credit, she’d taken it with her usual sangfroid but Cara could see that it had hurt her terribly. She still refused to talk about it or even consider dating again. What if that happened to her and Jason?

“I’ve seen it happen too but it doesn’t have to be that way with us.”

She smiled wryly. “You don’t think that every couple says that in the beginning?”

Jason leaned in and took her hands in his. “Not every couple has the history that we do.”

“I would rather die than hurt you. You know that. I’m terrified that if we change things…”

She could see that he knew what she was saying. The raw pain in his eyes at the thought of them falling apart tore at her heart the same way. They had always been open with one another but this was the most vulnerable Cara had ever seen him.

He covered her hands with his. “I just wanted you to know how I feel. Now that I know what you’re thinking… I don’t know what to say.” He tightened his hands around hers infinitesimally. “I love what we have—don’t get me wrong. I just can’t help but think we can be more to each other.”

“And what if it doesn’t work? Every relationship I’ve had outside of our current one has failed spectacularly. Look at my parents. At Chelsea.”

Jason shifted closer but before he could speak, she jumped in.

“And what kind of a relationship could we have—other than what we’ve got now—with you flying all over the place? You’ve told me that you never see your apartment. And I’m not asking you to give it all up. Not for me. I know you love what you do, so I would never ask that of you. But my life is here and yours is everywhere else.” She clamped her mouth shut and looked at him, fully expecting him to get up and run.

“Wow.” Jason looked a little shell-shocked.

Not that she blamed him after the way she just dumped it all on him.

“Right,” he said. “That’s good to know.”

“I’m not saying no.” And she wasn’t. But she definitely wasn’t saying yes either. Cara just didn’t see why they needed to change things. What they had, worked. Why mess with it? “But you wanted to know what I was thinking. And that was it.”

He stared into her eyes for a long moment. “Okay.”

Time for a subject change. Cara pulled her hands away and reached for her wine. She took a long sip and looked at the food. “So what have we got here?”

He kept his gaze on her before hesitantly returning his hands to his side of the table. “I’m not sure. Chelsea said she knew what would cheer you up.”

“It smells wonderful.” A barefaced lie. She could barely breathe and smelling would require more energy than she possessed at the moment. Cara smiled wanly and started eating with pseudo-gusto, if only so that she could escape that much sooner.

“It does.” He took a bite and chewed thoughtfully, though he didn’t vocalize what he was pondering.

They ate in silence.

“I’ve screwed things up between us, haven’t I?” Cara angrily stabbed what was left of her vegetables.

“No, you haven’t.” He looked like he was about to say something further but shrugged it away. “Want to move to the couch and watch some TV?”

“Sure.” Who needed conversation when they could stare at the TV and ignore each other?

Cara led the way and flipped on the TV. Within seconds, she was searching through the latest films. “What are you in the mood for? Action? Mystery? Comedy?”

He shrugged and flashed her a smile. “Lady’s choice.”

She tore her eyes away from his lean form and focused on the TV. Even then, she could barely process the words. Damn him for being so distracting. Cara mindlessly mashed the button when he snagged her around her middle and tugged her to fall back against his hard chest.

“That’s better.” He snaked his arms around her, securing her against him.

She could feel the rumbling in his chest as he hummed happily.

“This is the life, eh?”

At that moment, she couldn’t think of anything better. “Absolutely.” Before she could get too comfortable, she nudged him with her elbow. “What do you feel like watching?”

“Told you. It’s up to you.”

Jason stretched, and Cara simply lay against him, feeling his muscles shift under her as he got comfortable.

Cara flipped through the channels until she found something that looked semi-interesting and settled back. It was the most content she could ever remember being. Snuggled in a warm cocoon, she closed her eyes and let her mind drift. This is how things could be if they were together. She wasn’t totally delusional to think that it would all be happy times, but it could be a lot of the time.

The piercing ring of her phone stopped her from drifting off.

“Cara?” Jason held her phone out to her. “Say the word and I’ll reject the call.” The look in his eyes told her he was only half joking.

She blinked a few times to focus and saw Chelsea’s name on the screen. She wouldn’t call unless it was an emergency. Worry jump-started her heart. She took the phone with an apologetic grimace and stabbed the button to answer. “Chelsea? What’s wrong?”

“I think you’d have to see for yourself to believe it. Let’s just say that both your chefs are unable to work this evening.”

Cara ran a hand over her face. “What happened?”

“Not too sure, really. I think they got into a fight. The end of the story is neither of them can work with a busted hand each.”

“You have got to be kidding me!” Pinching the bridge of her nose, she sighed. “I’ll be right there.”

Jason was already on his feet and extended a hand to help her up. “Bad news?”

“You wouldn’t believe me if I told you.”

Cara started searching for her coat and shoes. They had to choose this weekend to try to kill each other. Couldn’t they have waited a few days? It wasn’t until she was looking for her keys that she remembered her car was still at the restaurant.

“Anything I can do?”

“Not really unless you can teleport me there somehow.”

“I’ll drop you off.” His phone rang as soon as the words had left his mouth. “Hold that thought.”

Cara left him to his call as she gathered her things. By the time she returned to the living room, he had his laptop out and was in mid-argument with whoever it was on the other end of the phone.

“Hang on a sec.” He muted his phone. “Can’t drop you off at the moment, but you can take my car.”

The thought of being behind the wheel of such an outrageously expensive vehicle made her mouth go dry. “I’d rather not. I just paid back one debt. I don’t think I want to owe you again if something goes wrong.”

He shook his head as if he couldn’t believe what she had just said. “Then I’ll call my driver. I can have it here in a few minutes.”

“Thanks.” Cara tried to smile but she wasn’t sure if the weary, wobbly movement she managed with her mouth counted as one. “I’m so sorry about this.”

“Don’t sweat it. You gotta do what you gotta do. Besides, it looks like I’m going to be busy anyway.”

So sweet. It just reminded her that she wasn’t the only one giving up work for this weekend, a fact that only made her angrier.

“Thanks. I really do hate to do this.”

He smirked. “You can make it up to me later.”

“Most definitely. If you’ve got time, you can always visit the restaurant.”

“You can count on it.”