My colleague and I were working on a new project that required a shared calendar tool, and after months of research, we finally had it nailed down to the perfect option for our team. Then we ran into a tiny glitch and reached out to our IT department, who told us we needed to use a different platform—one I was familiar with and viewed as old-school. I stressed out right away: “No way, we’re not doing that,” I said. “I don’t want to use that tool; it’s not good enough to meet our needs.” My coworker took a different approach. She listened to me vent, went back to our IT contact, and asked him to show her the proposed solution. After a few more exchanges, she sent me an email outlining why IT’s proposal actually worked in our favor.
I felt humbled, for a lot of reasons. One, she clearly took the time to be curious and get more information rather than shutting down right away, like I did. Two, she didn’t view herself as the person who knew best; she stayed open to other perspectives and possibilities. And three, the entire situation reminded me to pay close attention to the moments when I immediately launch onto the warpath, because that’s usually when I need to take a step back, cool off, and see what I’m missing.
If there’s one thing I’m sure about, it’s that life will give you plenty of lemons to make lemonade out of—trust me. So look for those moments of conflict when you or someone else gets all bent out of shape, and try to react with curiosity more than anything.