We all like to be comfortable, especially in our relationships with friends, partners, and family members. Sometimes it’s more work to do something different or against the norm, and change and the unknown can be scary concepts. Yet letting yourself be lulled into a pattern of always doing what the people in your life want to do, because it is easier, will eventually take a toll on your identity and sense of self. It’ll also get a little boring, no matter how much of a “creature of habit” you are! For example, my husband and I typically go to the same restaurants and bars, or do the same activities around town, whenever we sneak away for a date night. We love our norms and routines, but one year we decided we had to switch it up. We decided to do a monthly date…with one catch: the other person had to plan it completely on their own, and the person who wasn’t planning it had to be game for anything. Our first outing? Ice skating outside—something I would never choose. Still, we had a blast, and the experience reminded me to try uncomfortable things once in a while.
The same is true for you as an individual. Sure, it’s nice to have a buddy when you’re dying to try that new lunch spot or travel across the country, but you can also venture out on your own, even if it makes you a little apprehensive or nervous. Try something new that piques your interest, even if it doesn’t appeal to anyone else in your circle. Most of all, don’t let a fear over conflict or approval get in the way of you actually doing what makes you happy.