Rilee looked up from the local paper as Ellen came into the kitchen. She noticed the tired expression even her impeccably applied makeup couldn’t cover. ‘Good morning.’
‘Good morning, Rilee,’ Ellen answered in the polite, neutral tone she seemed to reserve especially for her.
‘How did you sleep?’ Rilee asked as Ellen made a pot of tea.
‘Fine, thank you. Although it’s usually the host who asks the guest how they slept,’ she said with a smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes.
Pulled in line yet again. Rilee would have normally let the matter go at that point, but the woman’s attitude was rubbing her the wrong way this morning. ‘I only asked because you’re looking a little tired this morning.’
‘Yes, there’s been quite a lot happening around here lately. I’m sure things will settle down eventually,’ she dismissed, taking a tissue from the counter and turning away to pat lightly at her face. ‘It’s unseasonably warm this morning.’
Rilee was actually thinking there was a bit of a chill in the air. ‘I see the show is coming up. Do you enter any of your flowers?’
‘Yes, my roses usually do quite well.’
‘I can’t wait. It’ll be my first time at a show.’
‘You haven’t been to an agricultural show before?’
‘Nope,’ she said.
‘How…unusual.’
‘That pretty much sums up my entire childhood,’ she said with a lopsided smile.
‘Speaking of which, when do we get to meet your parents?’
Rilee glanced up sharply at that. She and Dan had plans to head up to Tippery Heights as soon as there was a break in Dan’s workload, but that wasn’t going to be anytime soon. She’d tried her best to prepare him for meeting her parents. She knew he’d find some of their ideas a little out there, but she was pretty sure they’d get on. His parents, on the other hand…She could just imagine how Jacob would react when he found out her parents were permaculturists.
‘I’m not sure. They’re kept pretty busy.’
‘They’ll have to come to our party. You will invite them, won’t you.’ It was a statement, not a question.
‘I’ll let them know,’ she said, more to keep the woman happy than with any real intention of doing so. ‘You know, I can mix you up some herbs and some chamomile tea to help you sleep at night, if you like,’ Rilee said as she watched Ellen pour boiling water into her teapot.
‘That’s all right, I’ve never been a great sleeper.’
Rilee bit her lip for a moment as she decided the best way to approach the subject she wanted to bring up. ‘It’s funny, all the years I spent sleeping alone, but now I can’t imagine not having Dan there beside me any more.’
Ellen stopped stirring her tea but didn’t look up.
‘I guess I can understand how sleeping in separate rooms would make sense. It would be a bit disruptive with Jacob getting up through the night all the time.’
‘Excuse me?’
Rilee wrung her fingers together. Damn Dan and his lecture last night. She tackled sensitive, sometimes embarrassing issues every day with patients. Yes, she knew this wasn’t a patient asking for a consultation, but she was so frustrated that these people treated her like an idiot because she didn’t know about farming, when what she did know about would probably improve their lives enormously.
‘I tried to speak to Jacob about his frequent bathroom trips through the night. I’m concerned that he should be seeing a doctor about his symptoms. I thought maybe he’d listen to you.’
Ellen glared at her, a look of utter horror on her angular features. ‘I don’t know who you think you are, but while you’re under my roof you will kindly refrain from sticking your nose into other people’s private business,’ she said in a low hiss.
‘I’m not trying to be nosey. I’m speaking as a health professional.’
‘I don’t see anything professional about this conversation.’
‘Ellen, I’m sorry if you feel offended. I was only trying to help.’
‘Well, nobody asked you to.’
Rilee listened to the angry sound of her heels marching up the hallway and sank back into her chair despondently. She knew she’d overstepped the mark, but she’d been hoping that maybe, as his wife, Ellen would be an ally in her push to get Jacob to seek help. Clearly that wasn’t going to happen.
Her parting remark had stung more than she cared to admit. No one had asked for her help. No one asked her for anything. She didn’t fit in and she didn’t belong, that much was becoming abundantly clear.
Rilee wiped her arm across her forehead and grimaced at the streaks of dirt and sweat that came away. She could only imagine the sight she made. ‘Come and help out in the yards, he said. It’ll be fun, he said,’ she muttered as Dan grinned across the backs of disgruntled cattle being pushed through a race.
‘Aww, come on, Ri. Think of it as bonding time.’
‘Bonding? I’m thinking it’s more like cheap labour.’ It was hot, dusty and noisy in the yards and Rilee was fairly sure she wouldn’t be agreeing to tag along for the day ever again. They were a man down and she’d initially thought it would be a good way to see a little more of what her husband did when he was gone all day. So far she was struggling to get her head around all the various components of farming. She was yet to experience harvest time, but she could only imagine it would mean as many long days and nights out in the paddocks as seeding had taken. Then there was the livestock side of things—cattle that needed moving to another paddock, drenching, tagging or marking—not to mention a never-ending cycle of maintenance—fences that needed fixing, all manner of vehicles that had to be kept running. She’d been trying her best to learn about this new and foreign life she’d been brought into, but it was a lot to take in at once.
For the most part everyone was being helpful. She’d stuck pretty close to Dan and he showed her what to do and explained why they were doing it. He was a very good teacher, and she admired the way he spoke and treated Mark, the station foreman and the younger worker. His father, on the other hand, was as grumpy as ever and she noticed the other men tried to steer clear of him where possible. He swore and yelled his way through most of the morning and by smoko Rilee had just about had enough.
She watched her father-in-law disappear around the corner of the shed as Dan handed her a mug of coffee poured from a thermos. ‘That’s no way to treat people, you know. How on earth has he managed to keep staff this long?’
‘He’s a cranky old bastard most of the time. It’s just the way he is.’
Rilee didn’t believe Jacob’s bad mood was to be blamed entirely on an unfortunate personality.
Dan paused, eyeing her over his mug. ‘I’m pretty sure I don’t like whatever you’re thinking.’
Rilee glanced over at her husband and patted his hand as she stood up. ‘I’ll be right back.’
‘Ri,’ Dan started to protest, but sighed as she lifted an eyebrow in silent challenge. ‘Never mind.’
She picked her way across the hard-packed ground liberally dotted with dried cow poo and leaned against the rail fence near the rear of the shed where Jacob had gone a few moments earlier.
She saw his step falter a little when he looked up and saw her waiting as he came around the corner.
‘Before you say anything, I just want to apologise for the other night. I didn’t mean to overstep the boundaries but I am genuinely concerned about you, Jacob.’
She saw his face darken. ‘I told you before, it’s none of your damn business.’
‘Why would you let something like this continue when it’s clearly making you miserable? If you don’t care about yourself then what about your wife?’
‘What the hell would you know about anything?’
‘A lot more than you, obviously, if I can see what’s going on and you can’t.’
Jacob gave a disgusted grunt and moved to walk past, but Rilee wasn’t about to give up so easily.
‘Have you been having regular prostate checks at your GP?’
‘Bloody doctors. If you ask me, doctors are the reason this world is getting soft. They make money off scaring everyone into thinking they’re dying.’
‘All right, if you don’t want to see your doctor, I can help you.’
‘I don’t think so,’ he said coldly, moving past her and storming off across the clearing without looking back, leaving Rilee to stare after him in frustration. As they returned to work, Jacob’s temper seemed even worse than before.
‘What the hell did you say to him?’ Dan growled as he came up beside her later.
‘Nothing that made any difference apparently,’ she said, looking across at the older man, who was wearing a deep scowl.
‘Well, do everyone a favour next time and don’t say anything at all. He’s an even bigger pain in the arse than usual. The boys are ready to walk off the job.’
‘I was trying to help,’ she said quietly.
‘You can’t help someone who doesn’t want to be helped. Just leave it be.’
That didn’t make any sense. The healer in her found it hard to turn her back on someone who was obviously suffering, but she had no idea how to make Jacob understand that he needed to get help.