As Rosie walked home, she had to force herself to be strong and not to take a diversion to Vera’s café.
It was hard not to, though, but she told herself she didn’t have a choice.
Today, of all days, she would have loved to have sat and chatted to Peter about what had happened with both Hannah and Martha, and she would have particularly revelled in sharing with him her glee at gaining a partial victory over Helen. Of course, she knew the civil war raging between her and Helen at the yard had not, as yet, been won or lost. She knew Helen would continue to plot and plan other forms of revenge on her welders, and, of course, on the main object of her hatred, Polly.
And she also knew that Helen would still be baying for Dorothy’s blood after finding out it was her who had told Ned’s wife about the lies she had spread; it worried her what punishment Helen would concoct to inflict on Dorothy, but she would just have to deal with that as and when it happened. One thing about Helen, she was no windbag – if she said she was going to do something, you could bet your boots she would; she was not one to issue empty threats. The woman was not only seriously motivated by a need for vengeance, but also by a real jealousy of the women’s closeness and their friendship.
Rosie was aware that there were still battles to be fought, and that this was not the end, but at least for now, she and her welders had gained a reprieve.
As she reached her flat, Rosie’s mind once again swung back to Peter. He had become a good friend, and she was going to miss that as much as anything else. It was perhaps due to their burgeoning closeness that she had managed to fool herself that, by seeing him in a purely platonic capacity, she would spare herself any heartache.
But, she had not.
They might not have made love, or even shared a kiss, but she knew the feelings she was having were those that a woman had when she was falling in love.
And she knew she had to break the fall.
The desire and love she had started to feel for this man had to end – not just in reality, but in her mind also.
This love could never be a part of her life.
Vera was pressing down on her large kitchen knife, halving one of her doorstep sandwiches with such vigour it was as if she was a butcher dissecting a particularly tough carcass. She had not been able to stop herself from glancing up every time the little bell above her door tinged, signalling the arrival of a new customer.
Every time, she felt a disappointment that the metal jangling did not herald the late arrival of the woman in the overalls with the scarred face. Vera didn’t even know her name, but she felt as if she knew her. Age and experience had taught her to read a person well without ever exchanging more than a cursory hello or goodbye.
As Vera took a surreptitious look at the copper sitting on his own, she felt the tiniest bit sorry for him.
She chastised herself for becoming so sentimental in her dotage. ‘Yer getting as soft as clarts in yer old age,’ Vera mumbled under her breath.
The clock struck six and it was clear the woman was not going to turn up. Vera watched as DS Miller left his customary tip on the table; he had only taken a few sips of tea and had just taken a bite or two of his sandwich. She watched him weave his way around the other tables, all tightly packed into her small teashop – and as always he turned to give her a wave farewell.
He pulled the corners of his mouth up, but it wasn’t enough to create a convincing smile; she caught his eye and saw the all too familiar look of heartache. A look she seemed to see too much of these days.
What a shame, Vera thought, they seemed so smitten with each other. They positively buzzed with life when they were together.
Why hadn’t she come?
Vera told herself to stop being so pessimistic. There might be a perfectly understandable reason why she hadn’t turned up. She wasn’t going to give up on them. Something might just have happened and she hadn’t been able to get a message to him.
Vera resolved that she was still going to save their table for them next week.
She was determined that this would not be the end of their love affair.