“It’s been two days,” Natalie says over the phone. “How much time will it take?”
It hurts to hear her like this. Her life seems to always be caving in around her, but she hardly cries. What can I do for her? Guilt bubbles in my body, realizing my friends are usually the ones comforting me. What would Jas say? I tell Nat about what happened with Priscilla, praying it helps her hold on to hope.
She’s quiet while she processes what I said. I’m not sure she even believes me. “What if the spell doesn’t work? Then what?” She sighs. “I’ve got to go.”
Mili’s words resurface in my head, but they sound forced coming out of my mouth. “It won’t work if we don’t believe.” I cringe. “Call me if anything happens. Even if it doesn’t.”
“I’ll call,” she says.
When the line goes dead, I agonize over the conversation. Was she was looking for me to say something else? What if she has to call Mili because I couldn’t ease her pain? Then I agonize over feeling relieved I didn’t have to answer any more of her questions.
But I raise my hands in prayer, and when I’m done, I wish the way I wished for Priscilla’s payback. Hoping God or magic or both will answer and wake Donna up.
I walk past my stand-up mirror on the way out of the room. A gleam from it catches my attention. I hold my breath, remembering the shadows in Mami’s mirror. But there are no shadows this time.
Instead, a long crack runs down it, splintering out and distorting my body in places. It doesn’t look shattered; it looks smooth. I reach out to run my finger down it, expecting an illusion. But I cry out when a shard pierces my skin, then jerk my finger back.
My blood trickles to the rug.
The next day, I convince Mili we need something to do besides wait for news from Nat. We hop on a bus to the botanica because the crystals I have aren’t working for my anxiety.
“We could also get more salt, in case we need to try the spell for Nat’s mom again,” Mili says. I ignore her. If it didn’t work the first time, if it possibly made Nat’s mom worse, then what would happen if we try again?
“Maybe we’ll be able to see if Isobel’s still weirded out by your shopping choices,” I say.
Mili throws her feet up on the bus seat in front of her and leans back. She is the definition of someone who tries hard to look unbothered when they are.
“Why should I care what Isobel thinks?”
“Because then you can’t flirt with her anymore.”
Mili rolls her eyes, but Jas used to tease, “Isobel looks cute today, huh, Milz?” One time, she said, “You like Isobel. Why are you scared of it?” and Mili’s cheeks had colored when she said, “I’m with Jayson.”
I’d wonder what Jas was doing. It was clear that she still had feelings for Mili. There’s no way I’d push Aaron into someone else’s arms. But Jas also constantly flaunted her lovers. Maybe she wondered how Mili would feel about an open relationship.
When we get to the botanica, Isobel isn’t working the register today, and Mili pretends she doesn’t notice as we restock on candles and she picks up more sea salt. I buy a black tourmaline crystal and hope it helps protect me from spirits. But on the way out, we run into Isobel while we’re walking up the steps. She notices us, tugs on her backpack straps, and averts her eyes as she heads down the steps.
I swat at Mili. “Stop being ridiculous. Say something to her.”
“You’re so damn loud,” Mili says, pushing me a little, but Isobel had already heard.
She looks back and up at us. “Did you say something, Miliani?”
Mili shakes her head, and I elbow her. She shoots me a look before asking Isobel, “Maybe we can hang out sometime? Outside of the shop.”
I hold my breath as Isobel tries to remain hard and unaffected, but her deep-ass dimples get deeper. “I’m free Friday night.”
Mili hesitates, and I almost faint from lack of oxygen until she solidifies the plans.
When Isobel goes into the shop, I tease, “Mili got game. I wasn’t expecting all of that. You ready for a date?”
She shakes out her limbs like they’ve caught the jitters. “You peer-pressured me.”
“I did not,” I say. “I simply nudged you toward your blessings.”
“I should cancel. We don’t have time for this. We’ve already wasted a week. What about Jas? Nat?”
I sling an arm around her shoulder. “No canceling. You’re going to take a night off. We’ll call it resting to rejuvenate your magical energy. And besides, Jas would want this for you.”
When we get to my house, I swing open my bedroom door, and the sight makes me dizzy. My antique jewelry box is upended on the floor. I move into the room and see my gold jewelry scattered around the rug like someone took the box and shook it violently. I feel shaky picking up the broken-off ballerina, and turning toward Mili. “Do you see this?”
We sit on my bed, trying to untangle my collection of rope necklaces and Cuban link bracelets that are twined together. Mili’s not really religious, but even she seems extra shaken up as she examines the rosary beads. I feel sick from noticing the chain holding my larimar gemstone is twisted up around it. This necklace has been passed down in my family for generations, the stone so rare Mami hesitated to give it to me. It’s been three days since Newport, and each one brings a new surprise. Yesterday, I woke up surrounded by crystals, the suncatcher string hanging bare above my head. I’ve been dreaming of Jasmine too.
“Feels like she’s sending me messages from wherever she is,” I tell Mili. “Are we sure she hasn’t found space and gone to heaven?”
Mili looks up at me. “I’m sure, Inez.”
I avoid her eyes. “But why wake up to chaos, then?” And if Jas isn’t doing it, is she trying to warn me about it? My insides feel as tangled as the bracelet in my hand, but I don’t want to go on about it because Mili looks hurt and wonders out loud why she hasn’t been dreaming of Jas too. “Lindy said this will all get worse, right?” I say.
“She did, and Auntie said just because the spell didn’t do what we wanted it to doesn’t mean it didn’t do something. But I don’t really understand why Nat’s mom is still in a coma.” Mili fiddles with a knot and groans. “I’m hoping it’s just slow to take. We followed her instructions exactly. It has to work.”
I’m not as convinced, but hearing her faith makes me feel better. She looks over her shoulder like a spirit is listening. It puts my own body on alert. “I feel your pain, though,” Mili says. “I’m hardly sleeping. With the birds going wild all night, I’m surprised my mom is.”
I toss the bracelet back in the box. There’s no fixing it. “Maybe we’re taking too long, and Jas is trying to tell us.”
Mili’s face twists up as she leans back on her hands. “No, I trust my auntie. And Jasmine wouldn’t do angry like this.”
“I hope not.” I look down at the pile of jewelry, gifts from family members throughout the years. “Mami’s going to kill me.”
“We’ll fix it,” Mili tells me, even though some of the necklaces are too delicate for the knots they’re holding. “Let’s fix it.” She grabs my hands, and we form a circle with our arms around the jewelry. “Imagine it all loose, flowing, untangled, like new.”
We close our eyes and say it out loud. Loose, flowing, untangled, like new. We say it until my throat burns. When I open my eyes, I can’t help but laugh at the tangled heap. Mili laughs too. But then she picks one up, twists it, and the knots come undone.
My face goes slack. “What the…?” I pick another one up, twist it in my fingers. The tangles in the bracelet fall away with ease. We’re too amazed to speak for a second. But suddenly, we’re pushing each other and fighting over who gets to unravel the most pieces.
We head to the kitchen to make sandwiches, decked out in too much of my jewelry, spreading peanut butter and jelly on toast with chunky rings on our fingers, and smiling like fools. But after the high wears off, I grow quiet and admit to feeling guilty for having fun without Natalie. Mili says, “We’ll fix that too,” and picks up the phone in the kitchen to call the hospital. Nat tells us that the more time goes by, the surer the doctors are her mother will have lasting brain damage if she wakes at all. They’ve been talking about pulling the plug, but Natalie has been guarding her mother’s bedside, keeping Leanna and the doctors at bay.
None of us want to talk about the spell and how it hasn’t worked, so none of us do. I try not to be stuck wondering if the calling spell caused the coma and if maybe we made the coma worse by attempting to pull Donna from it, even though Lindy told Mili not to worry about that as a consequence. I tell Nat I’ve been collecting work from her teachers so she won’t fall far behind, but Nat only offers a quick “Thanks. I’ll call with an update soon.” I can’t blame her for not caring about school right now, but I feel the pit in my stomach grow.
When we’re off the call, I sit at the kitchen table, peeling the crust off my sandwich but not wanting to eat it. “Don’t you feel helpless? I don’t know how to comfort her.”
Mili sits across from me and steals my sandwich for a bite. “Pretty sure we can bang out her homework before your mom gets home. What do you think?”
I smile. “I’ll do the math. You can handle the essay.”