A person’s wealth lies not in their possessions, homes, cars or bank balances. Neither does it lie in their title or position in life, whatever that may be. A person’s wealth lies in their connections; the bonds that tie us together. All of us are special and unique, and these connections are represented by the love between parents and children, husbands and wives, partners, brothers and sisters, close friends and all the other key relationships in our lives. These are similar to the connections between neurons in our brain. Both need a positive and nourishing environment in which to flourish, but shrivel in the presence of emotional famine. Stress, bereavement and separation, working, commuting and rearing our children in the cauldron of modern Ireland, and unemployment, disappointment and illness, can all have a devastating effect on these connections at various stages of our lives.
Those reading this book are a microcosm of Ireland of the past, present and future. Many are fortunate in experiencing positive, nurturing relationships with rich connections. Others, less fortunate, bear the pain and hurt of separation. Some will have suffered the searing loss of those closest to them, and accompanying this is the seeming loss of those vital connections. Others have suffered the pain of illnesses like depression, finding themselves in dark, lonely places where all connections to those they love seem absent. Some may have been damaged by interactions with the world of addiction, particularly alcohol abuse. Others have been damaged by the harsh brutality of life, with its seemingly uncaring ways.
Apart from the connections with those we love and care for in this world, there are the connections between us and those who have left to explore the next, where we pray they are in good company and at peace. Much is hidden from us, and all is shrouded in mystery. Sometimes those of us left behind struggle in the tempest of life to keep alive those connections.
Just as connections between neurons in our brains need nourishment, so do those between us and our fellow human beings. It is love that provides the greatest nourishment for these bonds. It is my wish that despite any damage, past or present, to these vital connections, all of us will always try to keep our hearts open to love: firstly, by shaking off any heavy emotional baggage we may be carrying, often for much of our lives; secondly, once free of this burden, by learning to accept and love ourselves for the special people we truly are; lastly, by sharing this love with each other. There lies the path to strong, vibrant connections, peace and true wealth.
As I reflect on the love, support and encouragement given to me personally by so many people, including loved ones, friends, colleagues and readers, I realise I am indeed a wealthy man. For you, dear friends, are my connections.
Dr Harry Barry