CHAPTER 11

“Anything wrong, kiddo?” Royce asked as Tonya sat staring out the window after dinner one evening. “You’re pretty quiet tonight.”

“No. Just thinking.” Henry was curled up in her lap purring, and Clive sat nearby watching Tonya, his tail wrapped around his legs and his whiskers twitching.

“About what? The races tomorrow? Pretty exciting having two of them back to back. That’s a first for you, isn’t it?”

“Mmm.”

Jake was entered in a mile race that would just suit his come-from-behind style, and she had picked up the mount on one of Graham Lynde’s colts that he thought would benefit from the lighter weight. The trainers were still reluctant to give Tonya chances to ride in races, and it wouldn’t be until she started winning that they might put away their prejudices against female jockeys. That was always the way--you couldn’t win without a good horse under you, but you couldn’t get good horses to ride until you started winning.

Tonya was irritated, and not for the first time, by that dilemma.

“Tonya, I want you to be extra careful with that colt of Lynde’s. If there’s anything funny about him before the race, promise me you’ll take yourself off him. Lynde can always find another jock.”

“Funny? What do you mean?”

Royce hesitated. “Like if he seems unusually nervous, sweaty, shaking all over. That kind of thing.”

Tonya wondered what he was driving at. Racehorses were always nervous before races. All except Jake, she thought.

Royce changed the subject. “Have you seen that young policeman lately?” he teased. “I saw the way he was looking at you the last time they were here. What’s his name--Adam something?”

Tonya sighed. “Abarca.” She stood up and set Henry on the chair. “I think I’ll take a walk over to the barn. I won’t be long.”

She was out the door before Royce had a chance to respond, but not before Tonya caught a glimpse of his baffled expression.

Striding across the lot toward the barn, she was glad to be alone on the sultry summer evening. The sun had just gone down, leaving pink and golden streaks in its wake. The frogs were just tuning up for their evening chorus, and a dog was barking in the distance. The familiar sounds and smells from the barn soothed her jangled nerves. The horses were settling down for the night, finally relieved from the flies that plagued them during the day.

Walking down the shedrow, she patted each velvety nose that poked out to greet her. She was surprised to see Luis leaning on the railing, smoking his pipe and watching the sunset.

He turned as she approached. “Ah, mija,” he said, holding out his pipe, “you will not tell on me?”

“No, Luis, I won’t tell.”

Like all trainers, Royce had a strict no-smoking rule in the barn. Too many racetracks had suffered the horror of a fire in the stables. But Tonya knew Luis never lit his pipe near the stalls or the hay bales, and he was very careful to put it out in the dirt. She leaned against the railing next to him and let out a long sigh.

“You are not often here at night,” he observed.

She didn’t respond, so he just puffed on his pipe and gazed at the evening sky.

All at once Tonya started talking, and, as she did, all the pent-up feelings of the last few weeks poured out of her in a torrent. Her frustration with the male-dominated system that seemed intent on thwarting her ambitions and denying her the thing she wanted most, her confusion about the two men found dead on the backstretch, and her nightmare-inducing fears of a suffering a horrific injury in a race.

But mostly she talked about Royce and Lexi. She didn’t really know how to describe how they made her feel. All she knew was that she loved her father and liked Lexi very much, but hated the idea of the two of them together. When she stopped talking, she felt relieved and foolish at the same time. She leaned against the railing and wished Luis would say something.

Finally, he regarded her kindly, his pipe glowing in the near darkness. “I think maybe you are a little envidiosa, no?”

“I guess.” Tonya shrugged, not about to ask for another translation.

“You are alone, mija, and that is not a good thing. You see Chris and Alana together, you see the other jockeys getting mounts that are denied to you, and you are still feeling like la intrusa. And before Lexi came around, you had your father, and it was just the two of you, but now you feel he has abandoned you for her. So you are now envidiosa.”

“Does that mean jealous?”

“Si. Jealous.”

“That’s crazy. It’s not like he’s my boyfriend or anything,” she said huffily.

“No, but you see that he is happy with her and that makes you sad.”

She stood up straight and looked at Luis. “So you see it, too? I’m not imagining it? You see the change in him?”

“Everyone sees it, mija,” he said gently. “And everyone is happy for him. He has been alone a long time, since your mama died.”

“He hasn’t been alone,” she burst out tearfully. “He has me. We’ve been fine together. He’s been happy with me and the horses and our life here.” But even as she spoke the words, she knew it wasn’t true. There was something missing in Royce’s life, an emptiness she was just now beginning to recognize. All these years she had tried to fill the void in his life, as he tried to be both father and mother to her. She sighed. “But it’s not the same, is it?”

“No. It is not.” Luis continued to puff on his pipe, and they stood there listening to the night sounds.

After a while, she turned to go. “Goodnight, Luis,” she said. “And thanks.”

“Goodnight, mija. Ride well tomorrow. Be careful.”

Tonya didn’t sleep well that night, although there were no nightmares. She lay awake for hours, planning her strategy for the next day’s races. Jake was entered in the third race on the card, an allowance race for three-year-olds and up at a mile and an eighth. With her apprentice weight allowance, he would be carrying less than most of the horses in the race, and she knew that the lighter the weight, the easier the trip in races longer than a mile. She had heard a horseman say that five pounds equaled one length at races over one mile. Whether or not that was true, the lighter weight wouldn’t mean a thing unless Jake was in the mood to run and win.

In the fourth race, she would be riding that two-year-old from Graham Lynde’s outfit. At six and a half furlongs, this race would be over in about a minute and fifteen seconds, not much time for strategy. One thing was for sure--she wasn’t going to get him boxed in on the rail. That was a mistake she wouldn’t make again.

In the morning, she decided to eat breakfast, something she rarely ever did. It won’t hurt to have a pound or two extra today, she thought. Fewer bars in the saddle pad.

Thoroughbreds carried lead bars weighing up to five pounds each in the pockets of special weight pads. They were added by the scale steward as the jockeys were weighed with their tack just before a race. At only one hundred three pounds, Tonya nearly always had weights added to her saddle pad.

“Hey, Dad, I’m making bacon and eggs. Want some?”

“Sure!” Royce said as he slid into a chair at the table with his coffee. “Not often I get a homemade breakfast.”

While Tonya fried the bacon and scrambled the eggs in a bowl, Clive and Henry rubbed on her legs, begging for a piece of the delicious-smelling bacon. She tossed them each a little piece and then poured their cat food into their bowls. After the bacon treat, they sniffed the bowls with disdain and looked at Tonya reproachfully. “That’s all you get,” she said as she took the plates to the table.

“You’re spoiling those two, you know,” Royce cautioned as he dug into his eggs. “Pretty soon they’ll be wanting salmon for breakfast and filet mignon for dinner.”

“Well, as soon as we win the Kentucky Derby, we’ll be able to afford it.”

“We can dream,” Royce said, smiling, and Tonya felt the clouds of the previous evening blowing away. This is going to be a great day, she thought. Just great.

A knock on the door interrupted them. It was Adam. “Oh, come in, Sergeant,” Royce said, opening the door. “Had your breakfast?”

Tonya thought Royce seemed especially friendly to him.

“Yes, I have, thanks.” Adam’s six-foot-three frame filled the tiny kitchen. As he sat down, the cats peered at him, their whiskers quivering. After a minute, Henry jumped into his lap and head-butted his chest. Adam stroked his head, and Henry purred with delight. Adam had made a good impression on one cat at least. Clive sat nearby, clearly reserving judgment until further evidence could be obtained about this large stranger.

“How about a cup of coffee? Tonya, get the sergeant a cup.”

“You’re up early,” Tonya said, setting the steaming coffee before him. He smiled at her, and she thought again how much his eyes reminded her of a basset hound. All he needs, she thought, is the long floppy ears to complete the picture.

“I have to question some of the workers, and this is the best time to find them. I thought I’d stop by and let you know how the investigation is going.”

Oh, great, thought Tonya, just as I was starting to forget those horrors, now he wants to give us an update. What with trying to get race mounts, improve her skills and cope with the new woman in Royce’s life, she had been able to push thoughts of the two dead men to the back of her mind. Not that she had become callous to their deaths. It was just that they were a matter for the police. Let them solve the crimes. As Adam had reminded her that day at the police station, that’s what they were there for. The memory of his smile as he held onto her hand that day came back to her in a flood of warmth that both thrilled and irritated her. She had a big day ahead of her. She didn’t need her concentration broken by romantic thoughts of sad-eyed policemen.

“We interviewed Billy O’Casey for quite a while,” Adam continued. “He claims he had nothing to do with Carlos. He admitted to smoking an occasional joint, but knew better than to get mixed up with a dealer for the cartel. I don’t know that I believed him. Something about him doesn’t smell right to me.”

Tonya told him about Alana’s run-in with him, how she believed he intentionally caused the accident at the gate earlier in the summer, and his bad temper.

Adam listened with interest. “Well, we don’t have anything to hold him on, but I’ll keep digging.” He sipped his coffee. “By the way, have you ever raced your horses at Crestview Downs in California?”

“No,” replied Royce. “We don’t go that far west. Why?”

“We’re looking into the pasts of everyone on the backstretch. Seems Crestview was a popular place some years ago and quite a few of the local jockeys and trainers were at the race meets there. But it’s closed now.”

Royce appeared thoughtful. “Yeah, these small tracks are all having a hard time attracting crowds, what with off-track-betting parlors springing up everywhere. Then there’s online wagering. I don’t know how much longer this circuit will exist. No telling where we might end up. We move like gypsies from track to track.”

Adam cleared his throat and looked into his cup. “So you’ll be moving on at the end of the race meet? Where to next?”

“Arizona, most likely. But you never know what will happen. Things can change.”

Tonya wondered what that meant. She assumed they would follow the same pattern as in previous years. She looked inquiringly at Royce, but he gave no hint of his thoughts.

Adam drained his cup and stood up. “Well, I’ll let you get on with your morning. I’ll be in touch if there is any news.” He turned as he got to the door. “Good luck today, Tonya. I’ll be placing bets on your horses.”

***

Hours later, Tonya sat in the locker room gazing at her reflection in the old mirror and thinking about Adam. He was certainly handsome. And big. Angry at herself for allowing him to intrude on her thoughts, she slapped her boot with her whip. Get a grip, girl, she chastised herself. Keep your mind on your business.

She left the room and strolled into the walking ring to look for Lexi and Jake. It wasn’t hard to spot the big brown horse towering over the rest of the entries. Tonya stood in the center of the ring and watched him. He seemed perfectly calm as Lexi walked him around, unlike some of the others who were already sweating in the summer heat.

“Riders up,” the ring steward called. Tonya moved quickly to Jake’s side, put her boot into Lexi’s hands, and settled onto Jake’s back. Lexi didn’t give any last minute instructions. Between the two of them, they had talked strategy enough during the week, and Tonya felt she was as ready as she was ever going to be.

In the post parade, Jake walked quietly along without a lead pony. In the short time since he had been with Lexi, most of his bad habits had been cured. He wouldn’t act up in the gate as long as no one was holding his head. And his reputation for a bad attitude seemed to be little more than a reaction against rough handling. He had developed into a pretty laid back horse as long as he got his way.

Tonya surveyed the crowd behind the railing and was disappointed not to see Adam. Maybe he changed his mind and went back to the police station.

The starting gate was parked in the chute at the head of the homestretch. From there, the field would pass under the wire for the first time and make a complete circle of the one-mile oval. Tonya walked Jake around in circles at the back of the gate. Only then did she notice Mike on a bay horse with the number six on his saddle cloth. The horses were loading into the gate in order. Mike’s horse went in. Jake, carrying the number seven on his saddle cloth, would be next to load.

Tonya was disappointed to see Billy O’Casey approaching with his lead rope. Jake was calm as Billy led him into the seventh stall, but when he climbed up onto the side of the stall and took hold of Jake’s bridle, Jake threw his head up and tried to pull away.

“He doesn’t need a header, thanks,” Tonya said to him,

O’Casey continued to hold Jake by the bridle, causing him to resist even more.

“Don’t hold him. Please. He doesn’t need a header,” she said even louder.

Billy ignored her.

“Ay! Amigo!” Mike shouted. “The lady said don’t hold him. Are you deaf?”

Billy looked at Mike with an angry scowl then shrugged and hopped off the back gate of the stall. Tonya was stunned. Torres standing up for her? She gaped at him in disbelief, her mouth open. He gave her a slight nod then looked away. Tonya continued to stare at him, wondering what the heck had just happened.

The final three horses were loaded quickly. Tonya pulled her goggles down and waited for the start. There was no need to grab a handful of mane. Jake wasn’t exactly a rocket out of the gate. He stood staring down the track in front of him, as if indifferent to the whole scene. She only hoped that once the gates opened, he would come to life.

The front doors crashed open, and the field sprinted out of the gate. Jake’s start wasn’t as bad as Tonya expected, but he was in eighth place down the stretch and rounding the first turn. Tonya sat quietly, not moving her hands on his neck. The field was strung out with at least ten lengths between her and the leaders. Two were battling for the lead at a pace that Tonya knew was too fast for this distance.

Around the first turn, there were four bunched together behind the leaders, then one directly in front of her and two behind her. Tonya kept Jake away from the rail where the ground wasn’t quite as soft. They ran down the backstretch that way, and, approaching the final turn, Jake still hadn’t made a move. He seemed quite content to gallop along at an easy pace. Tonya chirped to him once, but got no response.

Around the turn, the two horses setting the pace had given their all too early and were being passed by the four behind them. The two continued to drop back, and the field bunched up around them. And still Jake was in no hurry.

Tonya was starting to panic. Maybe he doesn’t really want to run at all, she thought. Maybe he’s just going to hang out here in the back of the pack. Then she heard the two horses behind her move up and start to pass, the sound of their pounding hooves and sharp breathing on either side of her. Oh no, we’re going to finish last. Tonya clucked to Jake and urged him with her voice and hands, desperate for a response.

Suddenly, Jake’s ears flattened back. He grabbed the bit in his teeth and took off with a burst of speed that stole Tonya’s breath away. As they straightened out down the homestretch, she pulled Jake to the outside and saw nothing but open track in front of her. They passed the tiring leaders, who were falling back quickly, and one by one, they passed two of the four that were strung out in front of them.

Now there were only two more in front of her, their jockeys whipping furiously. She kneaded Jake’s neck with her hands and urged him on. But he needed no urging. He was clearly loving this. They flew past the two leaders, Jake’s huge strides eating up the ground as he continued to pick up speed. They swept under the wire two lengths in front.

Tonya nearly wept with joy. She had won her first race! Never had she experienced such a thrilling ride. Now she understood what motivated jockeys. The early hours, the starvation diets, the danger, it was all for this incredible feeling.

The field continued around the turn and stopped on the backstretch. She patted and stroked Jake’s neck and praised him. He flicked his ears back toward her, listening to her voice.

The red-coated outrider trotted up to her. “Congratulations, young lady. Great job.”

They cantered back toward the grandstand together where Lexi and Royce waited for them, beaming with pride and elation. The crowd along the rail was applauding and smiling at her.

She pumped her fist in the air. “Yeah! Yeah!”

She knew she was acting like a rookie but didn’t care. This was too great a moment to pretend it was just another day. She had won her first race. She was a real jockey. Her dream was coming true.

“Brilliant!” Royce said with a huge grin, coming to her side. Reaching up, he shook her hand, just like he did when other jockeys won on his horses.

“A perfect ride,” Lexi said, patting her knee. “You were patient and let him run his race. Couldn’t have been better.”

Lexi led Jake into the winner’s circle for the winning photograph, and she and Royce stood at his head. Jake’s sides were heaving from the exertion, but he posed for the camera, his head up and ears forward. Why, he’s just a big ham, Tonya thought. Loves the control, loves the spotlight.

She hopped down and was hugged by both Royce and Lexi. She was so excited she couldn’t do anything but grin. Pulling her saddle off the big horse, she gave him one final pat and then headed for the weight scale as Lexi led Jake back to the barn. There was no time to savor the victory. Tonya had to get ready for her next race.

At the weight scale, Mike was in front of her in line. She knew she should say something to thank him, but, with Mike, there was always the chance he would bite your head off when you spoke to him. She decided to take the chance and tapped him on the shoulder. He turned to her.

“Thanks for your help in the gate,” she said. Only then did she notice how beautiful his dark brown eyes were--deep, intense, and full of mystery and passion.

“You’re welcome,” he said and turned back to the scale.

Tonya had little time to think about Mike’s eyes. She slid off the scale and hurried to the locker room to change for the next race. Gazing at her reflection in the old mirror, she thought, So this is what a winning jockey looks like. Then she laughed at herself and stripped off her dirty pants and shirt, replacing them with the clean silks hanging on her locker door.

Hurrying back to the walking ring just in time to hear the “Riders up” call, she found Graham Lynde and his groom with the bay two-year-old she was to ride. She hadn’t had a chance to exercise him that week, so she wasn’t at all familiar with his quirks or running style. But he had a good chance to win today. He had come in second by a nose in his last race, and Lynde felt that with the weight advantage, he should have a good trip today. Two wins in one day, Tonya thought. That really would be a dream come true.

The trainer boosted her into the saddle. “Watch out for this colt,” he warned. “He’s a spooky little cuss.” He handed them off to the lead pony and watched them head for the track.

In the post parade, the colt jumped slightly at his shadow, thudding into the lead pony and causing him to grunt. He sure is a spooky cuss, Tonya thought. I’ll have to be on my toes with him.

They cantered around the turn toward the gate parked in the chute at the head of the backstretch. They entered the number three stall and prepared for the start.

Coming away from the gate with a rush, the colt jumped to an early lead, and they settled into a comfortable pace. Tonya took a snug hold of him and let him run easily. He seemed to be full of energy and liked to run up front rather than coming from behind like Jake. So Tonya held her one-length lead and waited for the rest of the field to come to her. They raced down the backstretch and into the far turn. The clock in Tonya’s head told her they had run the half mile in forty-nine seconds, a very leisurely pace. Perfect, she thought. I’m in control of the race, we’re cruising along in front, and the pace is slow enough that I’ll have plenty of horse left for the finish.

They came off the turn and pounded into the stretch. Tonya heard the hoof beats of a horse behind her as its jockey tried to close the gap between them. She let her reins out a notch and clucked to her colt. He poured on the speed, and they pulled away from the other horse. Tonya’s heart began to race. Only 200 yards to go and she would win her second race in a row!

But suddenly, she saw her colt’s ears prick up and felt his body tense. A flock of birds near the grandstand rail suddenly rose and frightened him. He ducked to the left, hit the inside rail hard, and bounced back, staggering from the force of the blow. Tonya was thrown off balance and clutched the colt’s mane as she tried to stay in the saddle. But the horse lost his footing. His head went down, and he began to fall. A shock wave of fear engulfed Tonya as she was pitched forward, sliding down his neck and hitting the dirt track with a crunch. As she bounced and rolled on the track in a terrifying motion that she thought would never end, she had only one thought--get under the rail! She knew if she could only get under the inside rail, she’d be safe from the pounding hooves that would be upon her in an instant. She tucked herself into a ball and hurled herself to the left. She felt the dirt grind between her teeth and saw a tangle of legs and steel horseshoes sail above her. Then she felt a sharp, hot pain in her shoulder. She knew she had been kicked by one of the horses leaping over her.

She lay still under the rail and closed her eyes. The hoof beats faded down the track. The air was still, the silence broken only by the wail of a siren as the track ambulance approached. Then she heard voices and felt strong hands lifting her. As she felt the soft, cool sheet under her cheek, the darkness closed in.