Chapter 10

 

The next morning the sun shone into my bedroom and woke me at first light, regardless of how late I had been up the night before talking with Matt, or what I had gone through during the day, being attacked by something supernatural and my best friend being nearly burned to death.

Oh, for the love of… For a moment I was tempted to get up, yank the shade down, climb back into bed and pull the covers over my head. But Matt was just down the hall, he would expect me to get up and soldier on. Then another thought took control of my brain.

I threw back the covers, stuck my feet into my slippers. After leaving my bedroom, I turned right and walked quietly down the hallway to the guest room. Should I knock? Hey, he watched me sleeping. Granted, I had been fully clothed at the time, and now I was thinking of sneaking in, hoping to find out he didn’t sleep quite so fully clothed. I bit my lip and put my hand on the doorknob.

“Ahem.” A throat cleared behind me.

I snatched my hand back and whipped around to find Matt standing next to my bedroom door with a mug of coffee in each of his hands. He was dressed in jeans and a dark green polo shirt, his feet bare. Probably how he snuck up on me. My cheeks burned. “Oh, hi, you’re already up.”

“I’m an early riser. Coffee?”

“Yeah, thanks.” I took the mug he offered. “I’m just going to grab my robe.” I focused past him to my bedroom door, still feeling flustered.

“You mean the one that got torn yesterday? I think it was beyond help. I torched it.”

“Oh, right.” I squinted. “You really burned it?”

“Along with the chickens.”

“Ah, okay.” I wrapped my hands around the mug for warmth and took a sip. Just a little cream and sweetener, exactly the way I liked it. He really burned my robe. “Why?”

Matt leaned against the door jamb. “Your blood was on it. I didn’t want to risk one of the demons getting a hold of it.”

I tried to imagine the potential risks. Was it like voodoo? Could people be controlled with blood or hair? “What could they do with it?”

“Hard to say. Maybe I’m being overly cautious, but better safe than sorry. Besides…” His eyes flicked down and away. “It was a lot of blood, hard to get it completely clean, there would have been stains.”

“Oh, okay. Well, I’ll just get a sweater then.”

His eyes swept down my body, the corners of his mouth ever so slightly turned up. He slowly straightened and moved to the side. “Of course.”

I glanced down as I moved toward my bedroom, suddenly shy. Damn that man. I felt an attraction between us. Did he? He frequently seemed to be teasing me, then every time we got closer than arm’s length, he held me off. Which was it? He turned me every which way but right side up. At the same time, I felt so safe with him around, like nothing could touch me. He simply wouldn’t let it.

In my bedroom, I set down my coffee and got out a thick, cream-colored cardigan with a geometric Native American style design and slipped it on, then buttoned the extra-large buttons and picked up my coffee. “Have you had breakfast yet?” I called out. There was no answer. When I stepped out into the hallway, it was empty. He’d already gone back downstairs. I shook my head. What was I going to do about him? I didn’t see a ring on his finger, and he never said anything about a wife. A girlfriend? Oh, crap and damn. No. No, I’d never heard him call anyone, and there hadn’t been any sign of anyone like that in Ithaca. Surely Shelly would have known.

They do say the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. I headed downstairs and into the kitchen. The table was already set. The man himself was at the counter with the eggs out, whisking a bowl of something. “You’re going to need a good breakfast for what we’re doing today,” he said.

“Oh?” I sniffed. Did I smell bacon? I didn’t think I even had any in the house. I walked over to the counter and flipped back a piece of paper towel covering a plate. Huh. Don’t look gift bacon in the snout. There were also fried eggs on the plate next to the bacon.

I leaned over to check the bowl he was whisking. “Pancakes? Cool.” I almost never made pancakes. “Why are they orange?”

“Pumpkin pancakes.”

I noticed he had an array of spice bottles on the counter and watched as he opened each one and dumped a little bit of the contents into the palm of his hand, measuring by eye—cinnamon, nutmeg, ginger and a tiny pinch of cloves.

I wasn’t a big fan of cloves. I could live without them easily.

“You want to grease the skillet and turn it on to heat?”

“Sure,” I said, grabbing the coconut oil and a spoon. I scooped a chunk of oil in and spread it around the pan with my fingers, then turned the heat on and rubbed the excess into my hands. I glanced up to see him watching me intently.

“Coconut oil—best moisturizer around and full of medium chain triglycerides.”

He swallowed and said huskily, “I know.” He looked back down at the batter he’d been mixing.

I got the orange juice out of the fridge. I had a feeling I might need the extra vitamins today. “Orange juice?” I asked.

“Sure, thanks.”

I opened the cupboard. “Juice-size glass or big glass?”

“Big glass.”

I poured us a couple glasses of sunshine and set one on the counter next to him while he poured a measure of pancake batter into the cast iron frying pan.

“Thanks,” he murmured, not looking at me.

I shook my head.

He must have caught the back and forth of my head in his peripheral vision because he asked, “What?”

My face turned red. “Nothing,” I mumbled and went into the living room to check on something. I couldn’t remember what when I walked in there, so I came back out. “I’m going to go check on the chicken coop. See what it’s going to take to get it ready for new chickens.”

“You’re probably going to need to burn it down and rebuild,” he replied.

“What? Really?”

“Well, you blasted a hole in the demon, based on the ichor it spilled, and you’re not going to be able to clean it out sufficiently so that chickens are happy in there. Maybe if you left it for a few years after you cleaned it, the scent would fade sufficiently. Animals are very sensitive to these kinds of things, though, you probably wouldn’t get them to lay eggs in there.”

“Ichor? What’s that?”

“Demon blood.”

“Right.” I wondered what kind of story I could come up with to get the fire department to do a controlled burn on the shed. I couldn’t imagine. It was a good shed. On the other hand, I’d seen some really neat chicken coops on Pinterest. Maybe I’d just clean it out and keep it for gardening tools then build a new coop across the yard. Yeah, that made the most sense.

“Pancakes are ready,” Matt said, joining me at the table with a stack of tan and orange pancakes.

“They smell fantastic.”

He grinned. “Found the recipe on Pinterest.”

I raised an eyebrow. A man who cooked and used Pinterest? Maybe he was gay, after all. And maybe he just wasn’t attracted to me.

“Okay, what?” He sat down and stared straight at me.

Shit. Should I just blurt it out? Should I ask him if he was attracted to me or not? Maybe the kiss the other night had just been because he was happy that I had remembered something in the dream.

“Pinterest and cooking skills - are you sure you’re not gay?” I asked bluntly.

He quirked an eyebrow and picked up his fork. “No. Not that I think there’s anything wrong with being gay. I learned to cook because I’ve been by myself most of my life.” He shrugged. “You want nice things, you have to learn to make them yourself. I stumbled on Pinterest one night while doing other research. It’s amazing how much searching for angels and demons takes you back to Pinterest. I like to cook, I found recipes, I get on there occasionally.”

“Okay,” I said. It didn’t quite satisfy what was really bothering me—why the arm’s length policy? I glanced over at him but held my tongue. I had exhausted my courage for the moment.

“Syrup?” Matt asked, holding the bottle out to me.

“Sure, thanks.” I poured syrup on the pancakes I’d dotted with thin pieces of butter. “So, how exactly do you plan to train me to protect myself?”

“There are a few things we need to go over,” he said, glancing up, then dishing fried eggs onto his plate and passing them to me before picking up the plate of bacon.

“Okay, but I do want to go into town and see Jen later today. It’s my fault she’s there; I need to support her as she recuperates. I want to find out how I can help and be as involved as I can.” Guilt pooled in my stomach.

Matt’s gaze flicked up momentarily from his food. “I understand you wanting to be there for her, but you didn’t do this. Don’t take that on yourself.”

I shrugged and didn’t reply, just kept eating.

Matt sighed. “I hope you don’t plan to heal her.”

I looked up at him in surprise. “Why not?”

He laid his fork on his plate. “A miracle healing? Think about the publicity it would create. Every demon would be down on this town in a heartbeat.”

“Oh, no, I plan to give her little doses frequently. Just to help her healing along, not enough to call attention.”

“Good plan,” Matt agreed. “Small doses shouldn’t be noticeable.”

I was glad he approved. It was my fault, she was my friend, and the demons were here because of me. I had to do something to help her. I’d rather concentrate on eating than fighting at present. The pancakes were spicy and savory, yet sweet. “These are amazing,” I marveled. “I could eat a whole batch by myself.” I found myself full though after a couple eggs, bacon, and just one pancake.

I picked up my coffee cup and took a swallow, then grimaced. It had gone cold. I got up to put it in the microwave for thirty seconds.

I started clearing the table while I waited. As I picked up the plate of bacon, Matt’s hand shot out and grabbed my wrist, holding the plate still while he forked another couple strips off it. My lips curved up, but then I noted his hand on my arm and felt the warmth of it, the rasp of his calloused fingers on my tender skin. I couldn’t help thinking how I’d love to feel that elsewhere on my body. Get your mind out of the gutter, girl.

A myriad of little white scars dotted his hand. I tilted my head. “What are those from?”

He let go of my wrist. “What?”

“The little white scars on your hand?”

“Burns from a particularly nasty demon. His blood splashed me, and it was like acid. Couldn’t get it off fast enough.”

“Their blood can do that?” I asked, aghast. I was lucky I hadn’t gotten any on me from the demon I’d shot.

“Not most of them.”

“So, what, like a particular class of demons?”

“More like an age. The older they are, the more dangerous they become. Also, the purer their blood.”

“The purer their blood? How do you mean?”

Matt popped his last piece of bacon in his mouth and stood up. “Give me a minute.” He headed upstairs while I finished clearing the table, rinsing and putting the dishes in the dishwasher. Not quite enough for a full load.

As I wiped down the table, Matt returned carrying a brown leather case with a crocodile pattern, about a foot and a half tall, two feet long and at least a foot wide. There were two metal buckles to either side of the handle, which he snapped open. The lid split, swinging out and back on hinges. There were a variety of items strapped into the case, tucked into pockets and set into the bottom.

“Okay, first off, there are different classes of demons, and they have different strengths, partially dependent on how old they are.”

“I remember you saying something about different types of demons that first day, but to be honest, I had trouble taking it all in at the time. Demons are fallen angels, right?” I asked.

“Yes, the cast out and cursed. Those are the oldest, the most pure and powerful. They are limited, and some of their names are known. The next level of demons are the ones produced when those fallen angels mated with the old ones, before Adam and Eve, Lilith and her kin.”

I ran a fingertip over an ornate silver cross strapped into the case. “I’ve heard the name Lilith, but how could there be someone before Adam and Eve? Plus, okay, I’ve heard all these stories, yet I assumed they were mythology. I mean, theory of evolution and everything, how could there be an actual Adam and Eve? Wasn’t that just a myth to explain things?”

Matt retrieved a small book from the case and fanned the pages. The writing was so small I couldn’t make out any words.

“Yes, and no. There was an Adam and Eve, but they weren’t the first beings God created out of nothing. The story which has grown up around them is more of a creation myth for mankind’s benefit and ease of understanding. That chronology is a little suspect and very confusing. We don’t know how many of that primary class of demons were created or all their names. The next level is the demons created when the cursed mated with humans. They’re half human, so they’re not as powerful, but they are still, if you’ll excuse the expression, hell on wheels.” I snorted, and one corner of his mouth lifted. “Then there are the demons created by those part demons reproducing with each other and with humans. Not nearly as dangerous and essentially just like the criminals we have to deal with today. In fact, they’ve swelled the ranks, can be hard to distinguish, and, for the most part, it isn’t necessary. The minor part demons are petty criminals, outcasts just trying to get by.” He shrugged.

He laid the case out on the table, so both halves lay flat. “Okay, you know you can tell if someone is possessed by a demon or if the being is a demon manifesting as a human, by touching it,” he started in a professorial tone.

“Right.” I nodded.

“You have to be able to touch it to do that, which makes you vulnerable because you’re really close to a demon. It also kind of pulls some of your energy and attention out of the here and now.”

I thought back to what had happened when I touched the man years ago, how he’d acted toward me, what I’d felt. I crossed my arms, hugging myself. “Okay, what about the invisible thing that attacked me the other day? It grabbed me, but I didn’t see anything or feel anything off it.”

“It grabbed you, but did you touch it? With your hands, I mean.”

“No, I didn’t have time. It grabbed me and threw me into the wall.”

He shrugged. “There you go. It can be hard to get a hold of a demon when he sees you coming. That’s where these things come in.” He waved a hand over the open case, then started touching the items one at a time and explaining.

A two-ounce glass bottle came first. “Holy water. It can be sprinkled on someone you suspect without hurting a human, but the demon will start to burn as if it were acid.”

I thought of the burns on his hands, but he plucked the bottle out and opened it, then dripped a few drops on his skin.

“Just water.” He closed and replaced the bottle. “If you need more, just stop into any church and refill. In a pinch, you can make more yourself, it just takes time.”

He slipped his fingers into a pouch and withdrew a small plastic case he flipped open. “Rosary. Always useful for calming yourself or making a demon uncomfortable. That’s about all it’s going to do, but put it into concert with other items, and you have a distinct advantage.”

“Crosses,” he said, flipping a sort of fabric page. It had multiple pockets which showed just the top of a variety of crosses, from simple wood to ornate, gem-encrusted gold. He plucked one out—a simple silver cross about eight inches tall by five inches across. “Silver is my favorite and works best. The purer the silver, the better.”

“I thought you said you didn’t go in for crosses much?”

He shrugged. “Mostly because the majority of lesser or younger demons aren’t affected by them anymore. You could say they’ve lost their faith, or fear.”

“Interesting. So…” I ran my hand across one of the crosses, feeling seriously foolish for asking the question, but I needed to. “Are vampires real? Like a form of demon?”

“Yes and no. It’s not a bad question.” He tucked the cross back into its spot. “I don’t know of any vampires in the form you see in Hollywood and literature, where sunlight will burn them, and you need to stake them in the heart to stop them or cut off their head and take it into the sun, but there certainly are demons which hate the sunlight. Plus, demons inhabiting human bodies will die if you stake them in the heart or cut their head off. I imagine most stories like that have some basis in reality. And there are demons who will drink blood, though I don’t believe they need it to stay alive.”

“Okay.” I felt a little less ridiculous for asking. I noticed a mirror peeking out and touched it. “A mirror?”

“Yes,” he said, holding it up so I could see. It fit neatly in his hand and simply reflected my face. “Demons of the first magnitude hate to see themselves, to see how far they have fallen. They often have some kind of mark or marring on their face which shows their corruption due to falling from grace. They can hide it some of the time with a sort of glamor, but a mirror shows it to them. They hate that. Now, it won’t hurt them except to give them a moment’s pause. It may even enrage them, which could be bad since you’re dealing with the most powerful of the demons, so it’s sort of a desperation move. However, if it can buy you a tiny bit of time to get something else ready or flee, it is occasionally worth it.”

“The demon I banished as a child had some kind of pock marks, like acne scars, on his face. Were those a sign he was a demon?”

Matt put the mirror back and folded his arms. “Did you see them before or after you laid hands on him?”

I thought for a moment. “I’m not sure.”

“Well, if you saw them before, then probably not. Lots of people have such scars for different reasons. If they only appeared after, then yes.” He selected a small, black metal flashlight.

“For demon hunting at night?” I guessed.

His lips twitched. “Well, it is handy in a way because demons can see in the dark where we can’t, but there’s more to it than that.” He turned it on and played it around the room.

The light shone a brilliant white and was somehow different from a regular flashlight. I looked at him quizzically.

“How would you bottle sunlight so it can be used against a demon?” He grinned. “Flashlight with a full spectrum bulb. You can’t pick these puppies up at the local hardware. Some demons just don’t like it, some will turn away from it.”

Next, he picked up a corked vial with a splinter in it and handed it to me.

I laughed. “Seriously? A splinter? Is this for lions or something? Shove it in their foot so they’ll lie there and cry about their wounded paw?”

Matt plucked the little glass vial out of my hand. “This is much more serious than that. Relics of saints are a strong tool against demons, especially older ones. A relic of Jesus Christ will vanquish them in seconds flat. This is supposedly a splinter of the actual cross Christ was crucified on.”

“Supposedly?”

He shrugged. “There’s a big market in fake relics. The danger here is always that it’s a fake. You try to use a fake against a demon, and you’ve wasted precious seconds. It may be just the edge they need to eliminate you or at least to flee.” He looked at me speculatively for a moment. “I’ve never had a way to test them, until now. Let’s see if you get anything by touching a couple of them. You get impressions off people. Let’s see if you can get an impression off a holy relic.”

He placed the vial back into its pouch and slipped a packet out of an elastic holder, then opened it carefully and slid out a piece of fabric. “Let’s start with something a little less precious or volatile and see how it goes.” He held the fabric out.

I took it and cupped it in my hands, and felt nothing, not even a tingle. I closed my eyes and tried to let my mind go in search of any sensation the fabric gave me. All I got was a musty smell and the rough texture of it.

Opening my eyes, I held the fabric back out to him. “Nothing. I must not be able to get impressions of things that aren’t alive.”

Matt shrugged. “It’s possible, but let’s not give up yet. I wasn’t sure about that one. Like I said, there’s a big market in fakes.”

He retrieved the vial with the splinter of the cross and uncorked it. “I’m reasonably confident in this one. Hold out your hand. Be very gentle with it, it may be brittle.”

I cupped my hands, and he tipped the vial, so the item dropped into them. As soon as it made contact with my skin, light exploded across my vision. I no longer stood in my kitchen. I peered around. A crowd shouted. Wind whipped dust into my face. Several people were on their knees with heads bowed. I looked up, craning my neck, to see Him, nailed to the cross, blood dripping from his hands and side, as well as the thorns pounded down onto his head, which hung as if past all human endurance.

Then I was back in the kitchen, on my knees, panting. Matt stood next to me, his hands on my shoulders. “Ally? Ally!”

I gaped up at him.

“What?” he asked. “Did you see something?”

“It’s real, for sure,” I said, as I reached for the vial on the table with shaking hands and gently tipped the little splinter back into it. “I saw Him, on the cross.”

Matt's eyebrows shot up and his mouth opened wide. “Yes! I knew it.”

I groaned and got one leg up, then steadied myself on the table as I stood. After what I’d just experienced, his glee seemed inappropriate. “You knew what might happen, and you didn’t warn me?”

His face took on a wary look. “Um, well, I thought you’d be sensitive enough to see something, to pick up impressions off an item with that much significance, I didn’t think you might actually see something. I figured you’d just pick up impressions. I didn’t think about what you might actually see.” He stopped and took a breath, which was good because he was babbling. He smiled weakly and finished up with, “Sorry.”

I grimaced. “Okay. Let’s be more careful about me touching relics from now on. What’s next?”

Matt pulled out a little leather-bound book, three inches wide by four inches tall. “Prayer book. Latin is good. Aramaic is even better, though a bit harder to pronounce. Plain old American is fine too. The intent is the important thing.”

“Don’t you need a particular ritual to exorcise a demon, or to know their true name or something?”

“Well, that’s the sure and simple way to do it, but the names are hard to come by, and the rituals are good. However, sometimes, you have to improvise. Besides, they were created by humans, and while we are humans, we’re not just humans. You’ve had experience yourself with banishing a demon by simply blessing it and laying on of hands.”

I wrapped my arms around myself. That had been an accident and horrifying enough. Did I really want to get into this? Did I have a choice?

“You okay?” Matt asked.

I met his eyes but didn’t say anything. I didn’t know.

“Three more items, and then we’ll take a break.” He pulled out a bag of what looked like coffee beans. “Coffee.”

I snorted. “For real?”

He grinned. “It’s good for staying awake while you’re trying to take down a demon. Sometimes it takes a lot of energy and hunting one can take time. Which also means the next item is useful.”

He tucked the beans back in and withdrew a chocolate bar. “Chocolate to draw out the very minor demons or just because, you know, chocolate. It can boost your energy when you’re feeling drained from banishing too.”

I cocked an eyebrow skeptically. “Chocolate can draw out demons? For real?”

“Picture starving street urchins.”

I shrugged. “Okay.”

“One last thing.” He put the chocolate bar back and picked up the book he had taken out earlier. He handed it to me. I smoothed a hand over the brown leather. “The grimoire—a list of demons and instructions on how to exorcise them. Of course, it’s just demons from Christianity. I have a separate notebook and items for exorcising demons from religions other than Christianity.”

“Wait, what?” I asked. “You’ve dealt with demons from other religions? How can they exist? From all the religions? From certain ones?”

He shook his head, and his brow furrowed as if he did not want to discuss it. “I’m still working that out. I’ve only met a few from other religions.”

I felt mightily confused. “Doesn’t one religion being true discredit the others?”

“Well…” He sighed and crossed his arms. “Apparently not.”

I had to think for a minute. “We’re talking about what happened over on His side of the equation, in heaven. The demons which were created were the fallen. How can those from other cultures exist too?”

He shrugged. “God is infinite. He contains multitudes. We work with what we have, and when we go off map, we deal with it the best we can.”

I gave a mental shrug and filed my question away. Okay. I noted the time. Nine o’clock. “I’m going to grab a shower. I’d like to be there for visiting hours at ten.”

Matt tucked the book back into its spot and closed then latched the case. “Don’t you think, considering there are demons running around hurting people, sometimes people you love, that studying up on how to get rid of them should take somewhat of a precedence?”

I scowled at him. Seriously? “Well, yeah, but Jen needs me too. I can’t just not be there for her.”

“So, let’s take a break, you get a shower, then you spend the morning studying the grimoire,” he said. “Then, we’ll have lunch, and we’ll do a little more training. Then, we’ll go into town and visit Jen until dinnertime. Home and some more training.”

My eyebrows went up. He was serious about preparing me.

“You can’t fight what you don’t understand, and there’s a lot to understand,” he said mildly.

“Okay,” I agreed, a little put out at having my day arranged that way, though he hadn’t said I couldn’t go see Jen, just that I had to place a priority on preparing to defend against these things. Considering what had happened to Jen, he was probably right. I really knew very little about them, but I knew enough to be afraid of what I didn’t know. Hell, from the way he spoke, he didn’t know enough, he just extrapolated from what he did know when he came up against a new threat.

Upstairs, I got clean jeans and a faded V-neck purple T-shirt out of my dresser with fresh underwear and went into the bathroom. Dim light from the window filtered in, so I flicked on the overhead and turned the dial for the vent fan. I unbuttoned my cardigan and shrugged it off, then hung it on the back of the door.

I had woken that morning feeling hopeful and even playful thinking of Matt, but he had quickly doused those hopes and thrown some of the scariest thoughts yet at me, along with the tools for fighting demons and the information about the different types of demons. Yet, I still felt like he was withholding information, like when he wouldn’t talk about non-Christian demons. He had told me so much—what could he be holding back? And did he not know, or did he think I wasn’t ready to hear it?

I turned the water on and ran my hand under the stream, waiting for it to heat up before flipping it from tub to shower, then I stepped in and tugged the curtain across. Turning under the hot water, I washed my concerns away. The water coursing over my skin comforted me. I slowly soaped my body, working down my neck, over my arms, and down my chest to my belly. I wasn’t the voluptuous sort, but very tall with a bit extra in all the right places. Matt was a bit shorter, and I couldn’t help thinking his mouth would be just the right height to tilt and… I sighed. There was no profit in letting my mind go there. I finished up quickly and got out of the shower. I toweled off and wrapped the giant towel around me then opened the door to pad swiftly down the hall to my bedroom. I closed the door behind me and turned to flick the light switch on.

A distinctly male chuckle came from behind me.

My head shot up as someone shoved me forward, pressing against me from behind and grasping my forearms I had managed to brace against the wall. The right side of my face pressed against the wallpaper. I could feel a hand grasping my left forearm, holding it, but there was nothing there. Alarm pushed adrenaline through my body. What the fuck? I drew breath to yell.

“Hello, my sweet Alstroemeria,” a deep male voice murmured in my ear.

At the first touch of hot breath on my ear, my panic slid away, and a sense of lethargic contentment bubbled up. He nudged my hair aside and pressed his lips to the sensitive skin at the side of my neck just behind my ear.

I felt dazed, as if his words or very touch delivered some kind of drug, but I managed to push out words in a murmur. “Who are you? What do you want?”

“Isn’t that obvious?” He chuckled again. As he laughed, the hands holding my arms slowly became visible.

It took me a moment to analyze the response. My mind moved slowly. The voice was deep and tinged with a strange though familiar accent. His laughter sent something through my body that I couldn’t quite fathom. “Who are you?” Where was Matt? Was he hurt? How had this guy gotten past him?

“You don’t recognize my voice? Ah, my dear, I’m devastated. From the time of the fall, when you snuck out to tend to my wounds, your compassion has been your undoing. Even then, as hurt as I was, my desire for you was overwhelming. I like this human form of you just as well.”

His hips bounced against my backside, and my breath quickened.

“Part of you knows me even if you don’t remember at the moment.”

A haze of lust descended over me, fogging my mind. My body responded to him as if it knew, by the sound of his voice and his touch, what it could expect. He had to be a fallen angel, but that didn’t make sense. How had one gotten into my home? I tried to think through what he’d just said and gasped out, “Why would I have helped you?”

The demon sighed. “Oh, my dear Merry. You truly don’t remember me? I’m wounded.” His hands left my arms and reached down to slide up my thighs, under the towel. He grasped my hips as the bulge in his pants rubbed up against the valley of my buttocks. I shuddered with the pleasure of his touch.

“Demons were once angels, and you and I knew each other… well. While we could not procreate with each other, we certainly could do the deed. And, we can procreate with humans, which you happen to be at the moment. This could get interesting.”

He spun me around, hauled me over to the bed, then pushed me onto it, my head on the pillows. A black silk scarf appeared in his hands, and he quickly secured my hands to the headboard. Now I could see my seducer. He was darkly divine.

Black hair fell in layers to his shoulders. He had high cheekbones under crystalline blue eyes and a strong jaw under full, red lips. His shoulders were broad, and a halfway buttoned turquoise shirt revealed dark chest hair. I pictured it tapering to his groin, below the waistband of the black pants he wore. Or was I remembering?

He caressed my cheek and jaw. As I opened my mouth to protest, a gag appeared in his hand, and he pressed it into my mouth, then tied it behind my head. “I’m sorry, my darling. As much as I would love to hear your unrestrained vocalizations while I pleasure you, I think it best that our friend below not know I’m here, at least until it’s too late.” He moved to the end of the bed and put one knee between mine, then shifted his weight onto it and pulled the other leg up onto the bed to kneel between my thighs. He stroked up my inner thighs. “He hasn’t been taking care of you, has he? I promise to do better if you give me a chance.” His fingers danced across my flesh just below the hem of my towel, and my hips bucked up to meet him. “Oh, yes, eager, aren’t you?”

Thoughts of Matt served to clear my head a little bit. I looked down at my seducer, helpless, and conflicted. It wasn’t fair. A gorgeous male, albeit a fallen angel, sat on my bed, ready and willing to pleasure me, and he wasn’t the one I wanted. This had to be some cruel joke of fate, right? All I could think about was the very human and flawed male downstairs who had once been an angel and acted intent on keeping me at arm’s length. How was I going to explain this? I stared down at the former angel between my legs.

On the other hand, would I survive this? My experience with horror movies suggested this could go bad at the blink of an eye, literally.

Even through the haze of lust crowding my thoughts, I knew I had to find a way out of this. My reaction to him made no sense, I had to resist it. There was no way I could fight him physically, particularly with my hands tied above my head.

“So, what will it be, my darling Alstroemeria? Be my queen, or be strung along like a little fish?”

I heard footsteps coming up the stairs and moaned through my gag.

The demon’s head turned toward the hall, and he muttered an imprecation then chuckled, his blue eyes twinkling as he turned back to me. “I suppose I could give you a little longer to consider my offer. I strongly suggest you consider it carefully. I’m one of the few demons not out to destroy you—currently.” He winked at me, then he was gone as if he’d never been there.

I closed my eyes and said a prayer of thanks, then tried to call out around the gag.

“Allyson?” I heard Matt trying to turn the door knob, but it wouldn’t open. “Are you okay? Open the door. Allyson? I’m going to force the door in. Stand back if you can.”

It only took him two good shoves to make the molding around the door give way, spilling him into the room.

He moved into a fighting stance, looking wildly around the room for an assailant, but there was none in evidence.

Matt’s eyes swept over me as I lay helplessly bound and gagged on the bed, aroused by the demon’s ministrations and embarrassed by it, now that the haze had started to clear. I was insanely grateful the towel had stayed in place somehow.

Matt’s lips parted, and his eyes slid slowly down the length of my body. For a moment, he looked like he wanted to take up where the demon had left off. He shook himself and moved toward me. An expression of guilt dominated as he knelt beside me and gently removed the gag, then untied me. “Are you all right? What happened?”

“Demon,” I said simply, my voice shaking.

“Did it hurt you?” he asked, his voice low and tight.

“Not exactly,” I said dryly.

He looked into my face and must have read the embarrassment there. His nostrils flared, and he finally took in my flushed skin and the scent of arousal. His eyes swept back down my body, putting two and two together.

“What did you do?” he asked vehemently.

“Nothing. Hey, I was the one attacked and tied up, remember?” I sat up.

“Then what exactly happened here?”

“I don’t know. He came at me as I entered the room and pressed his body against mine from behind, forcing me up against the wall.” I shivered at the memory. “He acted put out that I didn’t recognize him. Said something about me sneaking out to tend his wounds.”

Through clenched teeth, Matt ground out, “Zyriel.”

“Who?”

“The demon who was your… friend. Why didn’t you yell for me?” His tone held an accusation.

My blood began to boil. “I was pressed against the wall, held in place, my face smooshed. I could barely breathe, let alone say anything. He tied me down and offered me a place by his side, as his ‘queen.’” I seriously doubted he was anyone to be offering such an exalted title.

Matt’s eyes narrowed. “What did you say?”

“Nothing. I was bound and gagged.” I stared him in the eye and didn’t like what I saw. Was he jealous? “What the hell is this, blame the victim day?”

“You clearly didn’t suffer any at his hands.”

I rolled my eyes. “Of course not, he was hoping to take advantage of any remembered affection. Would have been hard to do if he’d cut me or something, don’t you think?”

I stood up, went to my dresser, and started getting clothes out.

“Are you considering his offer?” Matt asked.

“Oh my God, you are driving me insane,” I spat out, whirling around and yanking the towel off, then dropping it on the floor. I grabbed a pair of panties and jeans and started putting them on.

Matt’s eyes went wide, then he turned around abruptly to face away from me. “Don’t take the Lord’s name in vain.”

I couldn’t even think of words at that point. “Aaagh.”

He turned back and narrowed his eyes at me.

“Get out. Just get out.”

“I’m going to set wards around the house to make sure no demon, not even a friendly one, can get in.” He scowled and left, closing the door with great restraint behind him.

* * *

Training and lunch were intolerably tense. Matt stuck to business; otherwise, we didn’t speak. I was still pissed as well.

I would have gone to town without Matt, but he didn’t give me a chance, plucking the keys from my hand. We rode in silence. I stole glances over at him as often as I dared. His face was a mask of frozen immobility. I couldn’t believe he had reacted this way. My stomach churned. Was this over before it even began? I hadn’t even done anything wrong. I was the victim here. Okay, I had to admit, I hadn’t felt victimized. Why was that? I puzzled over it. I had been as shocked by my own body’s reaction as the presence of the demon. What had Matt called him? Zyriel.

I hadn’t even known his name, but he claimed to know me, well. My reaction to him agreed with that. My mind had strayed to the demon Zyriel throughout the afternoon, flashes of his face, but not the way I had seen him in my bedroom. These were flashes of him elsewhere, sometimes hurt and sometimes not. Sometimes in the throes of passion. Could what he had said be true? The more tidbits I remembered, the more likely it seemed.

Still, I hadn’t done anything. I had been tied up, for heaven’s sake. I thought about Matt’s question, why hadn’t I yelled at first? Surprise? Disbelief? I couldn’t even see the demon. I knew that didn’t mean anything with them, but still, it had been surreal. Then I’d been gagged. Come on, that has got to count for something.

And I was being honest, I should get points for that. Okay, Zyriel had to have been exercising some kind of control over me. That had to be it. At least, it was my story, and I was sticking to it. There was another aspect to it as well.

“You know,” I said quietly as we approached the edge of town. “Maybe if you didn’t keep me in such a constant state of sexual excitement and denial, he wouldn’t have been able to get to me so easily.”

“What?” His tone was incredulous.

I bobbed my head vigorously. “Oh yeah, yep. One minute you’re touching me or kissing me, and the next you’re walking away, repeatedly. I bet he used it against me to get me all confused and worked up. It was like he tapped into something in me, my sexual frustration. It was probably just the in he needed.” Okay, maybe that had started way before Matt came along, but he sure as hell had added plenty to it. I wasn’t going to let him off the hook too easily. He needed to share some responsibility for what happened.

Matt pulled into the parking lot of the hospital and parked the car.

I got out and stood there with the door open. “Are you coming in?”

“No, I think I’ll wait out here,” he said quietly.

“Fine,” I said, and slammed the door. I heard my mother’s voice in my head: Don’t slam the car door. “It’s my car door, I’ll slam it if I want to,” I snarled under my breath.

For good measure, I crossed the street without looking both ways. We were in a ten mile per hour zone anyway, and I didn’t see anything in my peripheral vision. Oh, I had myself a fine old snit.

Inside the building, I skirted the reception desk to the left and walked down the hallway to the elevator, which would open on the correct side of the building. I rode up to the fourth floor and stepped out onto the landing where the door I had to be buzzed through stood.

“The doctors are running a little behind on rounds,” the nurse inside told me pleasantly. “It’ll only be about ten minutes if you’d care to wait in the family room. I’ll let you know when you can come on in. Just between you and me and the wall, this isn’t unusual. Most people don’t show up for the first twenty minutes of visiting hours for just this reason, just so you know in the future.”

“Thanks,” I said and gave her a small smile. Her friendly demeanor took a little of the bite out of my own crappy attitude. I took a deep breath, then turned and went down the hall to the empty waiting room where I made a cup of coffee and sat down. That was where the priest found me.

“Good morning. It’s so good to see you again. Allyson, isn’t it?”

I was somewhat taken aback. His overly enthusiastic manner made me think of a Broadway actor. He seemed quite nice. I liked him, in one way, though his bonhomie seemed a bit over the top. It made me wonder if I could trust him. I’d heard Charles Manson had seemed really nice to some people too. “Good morning, Father Patrick. How are you?”

He raised his hands, palm up. “Just enjoying the day the Lord has given us. And you?”

“It’s been an interesting day already,” I said wryly, then hurried on, “Are you here to see Jen?”

He clasped his hands together. “Yes, and anyone else who wishes to visit with clergy today. I’m here in my capacity as chaplain, taking my turn at the hospital.”

“You take turns?”

His head bobbed up and down. “Yes, with other clergy in the area, from other denominations.”

“That’s nice,” I said, twirling the stirring stick in my coffee to bring the creamer up from the bottom.

“And I’m so glad you’re here. I really believe strongly that it’s important patients have visitors, that they know people care about them and want them to get well. In my experience, it makes a vast difference in their recovery.”

“Thank you, Father, I’ll keep that in mind.” I hesitated. Here was someone with in depth knowledge of demons and angels. “Can I ask you a question?”

“Certainly.” He nodded solemnly and took a seat, as if preparing to be quizzed on anything I might ask.

I suppressed a laugh at his bubbly attitude. “I’m not Catholic.”

He shrugged. “That’s okay.”

“I mean, I grew up Episcopalian, but, to be honest, I’ve waffled back and forth between being atheist and agnostic for the past fifteen years.”

“And now?”

“Well.” I stared down at the floor, out the window, then up at the ceiling. “Recently, some things have happened that led me to believe there definitely is some kind of higher power, though I’m not sure of anything beyond that.”

“Fair enough. Can you share with me what those things are?”

I slowly shook my head. “I’d rather not.”

“Okay. So, what was your question?”

I turned directly to him. “What do you know about angels?”

“Well, you’re in luck,” he enthused.

“Oh?” I asked, a little taken aback.

“Angelic presence was one of my favorite papers in the seminary.” He beamed.

I chuckled. “Great. What do you know?”

He crossed one leg over the other and drummed his fingers on his knee. “There’s actually relatively little said about angels in the bible. They’re only mentioned eleven times, to be precise.”

I nodded to encourage him and took a sip of my coffee.

He held up one hand and counted off occurrences on his fingers. “Okay, let’s see. There’s the time Mary is visited by the angel to tell of the coming of Jesus’ birth, of course. There are the angels who appear to the shepherds to announce the birth of Christ, ‘and a multitude of the heavenly host.’”

“What exactly does heavenly host mean?” I interrupted.

“They are the ones who take care of God’s bidding.”

“Okay, so every time an angel is mentioned, it’s male, right?”

“Well, considering the differences in language and how we call groups of people by a male pronoun, that’s actually nearly impossible to decipher. One might use the neuter in talking of a person when uncertain.”

I shook my head. “Are angels male and female or only male?” I asked bluntly.

“No one really knows.”

“I’ve always heard them referred to as male.”

“Yes, but the people who wrote the Bible and most of the texts about it for centuries were predominately male, so of course they would interpret linguistic differences in the direction they were most comfortable with.”

“Okay, that makes sense. The winners write the history books.”

“Also, the plain fact is the angels’ lives don’t concern us most of the time. We pay attention to what God says about how we should live. I’m sure he communicates to the angels how he wants them to live. It may not be the same set of rules, as it were.”

“Like priests and lay people?”

“If you like, that is an apt analogy.”

“Fair enough.”

“Any particular reason for the line of questioning?” he asked with a squint and a backward tilt of his head, as if looking at me through spectacles.

I just smiled.

“You’d rather not say.”

I inclined my head with a slow blink.

“Okay.”

In the long run, it really didn’t matter. I knew I was female now whether or not I was over there, and, after my experiences, I could no longer doubt Matt had told me the truth about us being angels. Well, I could doubt it, but that would fall into a level of conspiracy theory I simply was not capable of entertaining in my brain at that point.

The nurse appeared in the doorway. It was four-fifteen. “You’re free to come in now, folks.”

I walked with the priest down the hall. We took turns scrubbing in at the sink, then got gowns on. We parted ways as he went to check with the nurses on whether anyone had particularly asked for him. I went to visit with Jen.

I walked into her room and found her watching a television show. “Feeling better already?” I asked.

Her lips parted, but no sound came out. Her eyes closed then, and soon she was snoring lightly. The nurse who had been working with her monitors and IV turned to check on her. “She just had an increase in pain medication, so we gave her a push to help compensate for the wait. She may be slightly loopy for a bit. She’ll be in and out until it wears off, then she’ll be in a little more pain but lucid.”

“Oh, okay,” I agreed, but it gave me pause. That meant they were having difficulty managing her pain.

“It’s not as bad as it sounds,” the nurse said kindly. “She had a treatment this morning to remove dead skin, and the parts which weren’t burned as badly are going to hurt more. She’s got a long road ahead of her, but she’s going to be just fine.” The nurse started out the door. “Just remember to keep back about four feet. We don’t want to risk her getting an infection when her immunity is down.”

As soon as the nurse had left, I approached Jen and touched her cheek with one finger, closing my eyes and envisioning golden healing energy flowing out of my body and into her, like a trickle charger. It didn’t even wake her. When I had finished, I sat down and picked up a magazine. I stayed for an hour, but she mostly smiled loopily or slept. Towards the end of the time, she started to come around.

“Hey,” she said in a raspy voice.

I looked up from the magazine. “Hey, how are you feeling?”

“Better than this morning.”

“I heard.”

Jen grunted. “You didn’t hear anything. They keep the screaming that goes on around here under wraps. It’s not fun having your dead skin scrubbed off.”

I winced.

“Mom said a new man came in with you. Who is he, and why haven’t I met him?”

I pictured Matt and couldn’t hold back a frustrated sigh.

“That good, huh?” She started to laugh, then winced. “Is he the guy from Cornell?”

“Yes, but… it’s complicated.”

“I always knew it would be.”

I tried to think what to say without saying too much. She already knew something was up with what she had seen, and I didn’t want to overtax her or freak her out in her current state. She might even decide she had hallucinated. It would be great to be able to take her into my confidence, but I didn’t want to deny her sanity by insisting she believe in things she might be better off forgetting. I decided to keep it simple. “He’s gorgeous, blond, and built. He’s also very frustrating. I think he’s holding back because he’s not sure whether our relationship can work.”

“Why wouldn’t it?”

I shrugged. “He lives in New York, I live here. He’s visiting right now, we’re just exploring how this partnership can work.”

“What does he do again?”

“He’s an ornithologist.”

“That’s great. You have the same interests.” Her eyes sparkled. “I predict next year I will be a bridesmaid at your wedding.”

I rolled my eyes but didn’t deny it. Her thinking about the future and having something to look forward to might be a good thing.

Just then, the dinner cart arrived. Luckily, her throat hadn’t been adversely affected, she was able to breathe and eat on her own. Because of the bandages on her hands, she did require some help getting the food to her mouth. I said my goodbyes and promised to visit again soon.

“I can’t wait to meet him,” Jen said, then yawned.

I flapped my hand at her from the required four feet away. I couldn’t even promise he would still be around in a few days, let alone when she got out of the hospital.

There was already a guy in blue scrubs with his head bent over a clipboard when I got on the elevator, so I faced forward, folded my arms, and thought in silence about how to handle Matt as the doors slid shut.

“Has the worm turned so soon?” I heard from behind me.

I turned to find my demon lover with a merry smile on his lips and a twinkle in his eye.

“You, give me one reason I shouldn’t banish you right now.” I took a step forward with my hand up and found myself facing empty space. He had rolled up like a snapped shade, leaving a line of smoke.

“Now, now, play nice, or I won’t share what I know and, trust me, you could use a friend who knows what the other side is planning right now,” a disembodied voice chided me gently.

I crossed my arms again. “Why should I believe a single word you say?”

He appeared so close in front of me that I inhaled sharply and took a step back, putting up my hands to ward him off. “Darling,” he said reproachfully. “I’ll tell you what, I’ll let you touch me as long as you promise not to exorcise me in the next ten minutes.”

I snorted. “And why would you trust me?”

He stepped closer as I backed up until he could lean over me with a hand on the wall. “Because right now, I know you better than you know yourself, apparently.” He smirked. “I certainly know your body better than anyone else, even if it is a human version.” He leaned down slowly as if to kiss me; I ducked out of the way.

“Fine, I promise I won’t exorcise you in the next ten minutes…”

He turned to follow me with his eyes.

I tilted my head forward and glared, trying to look menacing. “As long as you don’t do anything to hurt me or anyone else during that period of time.”

He raised both hands in a gesture of surrender. “Fair enough.” He spread his legs and grinned, keeping his hands up. “Come and touch me.”

The sexual overtone he gave it made me hesitate, but I needed to know if I could trust him at all. He was offering information from the enemy. I took just a few steps until I could touch his chest with my fingertips at arm’s length.

He let out a moan of pleasure and gripped my shoulders. We were no longer in the elevator.

“Do you remember this?” I heard his silky voice and felt his breath in my right ear.

I gasped as sensations surged over my body. I was lying on my back, and he lay between my legs. I knew it was him, even though I could only see the top of his head and feel what his very talented tongue and fingers were doing as I writhed under his ministrations. He was my lover, but only in the physical sense. Even as I felt the enjoyment of the time we spent together, and the affection we shared, I knew my heart belonged to another. This was just… filling a physical need my soul mate could not, or was not willing to.

I snapped back to my body in the elevator and inhaled deeply. Zyriel stared into my eyes with a sadness that had not been there before. “Yes, I know,” he said quietly. “It’s him. It’s always been him between us.”

“I never realized you wanted more,” I said. The vision had released a flood of memories, and I struggled to assimilate them. The bond had let us share something more than just memories, it had let us share thoughts and emotions for a moment. I realized I had always meant more to him than he had to me. I felt guilty for that, as if I’d used him. “I’m sorry.”

His hands dropped from my shoulders. He pursed his lips and breathed in through his nose. “It’s okay. It was good while it lasted, right?”

I shook my head, frustrated. “Aren’t angels supposed to be above all this?”

Zyriel threw his head back and laughed deeply, then looked at me. “I’ve never quite understood why humans persist in thinking angels are so different from them. Consider why Lucifer led us in rebellion—pride, anger, jealousy - and you…” He tapped the tip of my nose. “You should know better.”

That was absurd. I threw my hands up. “Why? I keep telling you, I don’t remember anything.”

He crossed his arms, and his face was hidden in shadow, but his head shook from side to side. “I don’t believe you,” he said softly. He stepped closer and cupped my face. “I know you remember now at least some of what we shared.”

At that moment, the elevator doors slid open, signaling the end of our descent. I looked over to see Matt, scowling ferociously at Zyriel’s proximity. Their eyes met.

“You,” Matt growled.

“Mattheus,” Zyriel said coolly.

Matt stepped into the elevator, and the doors closed behind him.

I moved to position myself between the two. I didn’t like the way they were eyeing one another.

“You should not be consorting with the likes of him,” Matt ground out.

“I just had one more question.” I turned to Zyriel. “Why? Why did you throw your lot in with them when they revolted in Heaven?”

He grinned ruefully. “Well, I had a little problem with greed when it came to His creations.”

“Ally,” Matt supplied.

“Yes, and no. Being with our sweet Merry here epitomized everything I enjoyed most about sex, but sensual pursuits in general are my vice. I adore how humans have elevated it to the spiritual and deplore how they’ve sometimes degraded it to the violent. However…” He leered at Matt. “I did so love sliding my tongue all over Merry. I always thought a threesome with the two of you would be sublime, Mattheus.”

Matt growled and stepped forward. Zyriel flicked his fingers at him as if expelling water, and Matt froze. Zyriel looked back down at me and cupped my chin. “I’d best go before he rips my head off and shoves it up my arse,” he said ruefully.

“Could he do that?” I asked incredulously. Zyriel was a fallen angel in his true form, while we were humans, with all the frailty that implied.

“Well, if there were ever a time, thinking about you and me together might make it possible.” He laughed crudely, then leaned down and pressed his lips to mine once, quickly. “Mmm, I do miss the taste of you.” He disappeared with a wink.

Then I felt a kiss on my cheek, and his voice whispered in my ear. “I could never destroy you anymore than you could banish me.”

I snorted. He acted more like a millionaire playboy than a demon.

Matt jolted forward, his head whipping around. “Where did he go?”

I shrugged. “He left.”

Matt changed direction and came at me. Shocked, I let him back me up against the elevator wall until he buried his hands in my hair. “I… you…” he said, then his mouth descended on mine, lips and tongue and teeth laying siege. I moaned low in my throat and felt him reach down, grasp my thighs and pull them up around his waist. His mouth left mine, and I grasped his arms, at once feeling his need to claim me for himself.

“Yes,” I moaned as he sucked at the base of my throat.

The elevator dinged open once more, and I stared at the shocked expression on Father Patrick’s face. I tugged at Matt’s hair. “Hello, Father.” I smiled weakly. I heard the faint echo of a mocking laugh and saw the priest look up, perplexed, as if he had heard it too.

* * *

Outside, I led the way to the car and took my keys back from Matt, my only thought to get us outside of town, onto a deserted road, so I could pull over and pick up where we left off.

I took it easy heading out of town. Once I hit the country roads where there was no speed limit posted, I opened her up and flew along, letting the speed and freedom soothe something inside me.

I took a back road and slowed down, then pulled the car over in the entrance to a field to park. The roads were pretty deserted out here, but I didn’t want to just sit in the middle of the road. I turned the ignition off as I unbuckled my seat belt, eager to be in his arms. I turned.

He wasn’t looking at me again.

“I don’t know how to be around you anymore,” he said.

“What…” I started to ask what in the world he was talking about, but he held up a hand, so I shut my mouth and sat back, gripping the steering wheel a little too tightly.

“On the other side, I loved you more than anyone.”

“Except for God,” I said quietly, supplying the ending, without rancor.

“No,” he responded vehemently. “I loved you more than anyone. I would do anything for you.”

It was my turn to look around for the lightning bolt.

“Over there, I knew you had a physical relationship with Zyriel. That was okay because it made you happy. I didn’t have the same need, and he filled it for you. I was the one you shared your mind and soul with. I was ecstatic with that, but it’s different here.”

“Yeah, you don’t have a giant flaming sword,” I said, trying to lighten the mood.

After a moment, I felt his stare and met it. “Sorry.” I faced forward.

He sighed. “Everything here is much more… emotional, physical, carnal.”

I sat up a little straighter.

I stared straight out the windshield, not daring to look at him. “What are you saying?”

“I am saying I want you constantly, passionately, unbearably. I want to rip off your clothes and touch every inch of you, hear you moan my name, to be united with you in a way we never have, and I cannot stand the thought of you being with him, here, the way I never could over there. I don’t know how to live like that again.”

I closed my eyes. “I am not asking you to,” I said through clenched teeth.

“I think the best thing is for me to train you and then get out of the house. I can’t stand to watch you with him.”

“For the love of God, I was tied up.” I opened my eyes and looked over at him in exasperation. “I don’t want any kind of relationship with him. All I could think of was you. I have no interest in being his queen of the damned or whatever the hell he wants.”

He met my gaze.

I blew out my frustration. “I’ve only known you in this life for a couple weeks, yet I can tell we mean much more to each other than anyone I’ve ever known or can remember in the other life we shared. And there is no one on this Earth or elsewhere who I have ever wanted a physical relationship with more than you. I enjoyed spending time with Zyriel over there, that’s true, but he was a poor substitute for you.” I sat back and regarded him sadly. I didn’t know how to convince him he should stay. I didn’t even know for certain he should. I just knew I wanted him physically, and I could feel the love I had had for him throughout time. “So... where does that leave us?”

His arm shot out, and his fingers encircled my wrist, then tugged, pulling me closer and off balance. I was startled at the sudden action, and my lips parted with a quick gasp.

His eyes glittered. “Let’s find out.”

I could have righted myself, but did I want to? No, I did not. I met him across the center console as he used his other hand at the nape of my neck to draw my face down to his.

A few minutes later, a car rocketed past us, and we came up for air. “Probably some kids headed home from school, though I think we should probably take this back to the house,” I said.

“Agreed.”

I shuddered as I sat back properly in the driver’s seat and started the car again. Being extra cautious because my senses were still reeling after the lack of oxygen for the last few minutes, I looked behind us and pulled back out into the road. “Okay.” I may have jerked the steering wheel slightly when I felt Matt’s hand rest on my thigh and start a slow slide up.

He chuckled. The sound reverberated through my body.

“Not fair,” I protested.

“Drive faster,” he suggested.

It was my breath that was going too fast, though. I inhaled slowly as I went around a curve.

A darkly clothed figure ran into the road. I jammed on the brakes and felt the first impact as I hit him, then a second jarring thud as the body flew up into the air and came down on the hood. The car came to a stop. The body rolled forward off the car onto the ground, making the car shake again. “What the hell,” I yelled, throwing the car into park.

I heard Matt say, “No. Don’t,” but I was already opening the car door. Matt came around the other side of the car.

I leaned down, unable to believe whoever it was could possibly still be alive. I felt for a pulse anyway. I touched his skin, and felt the agony of a thousand souls crying out. I yanked back my hands and studied the features of his face. They swam in front of my eyes, becoming distorted and misshapen until I realized what it was.

“It’s not human,” I said. “I mean, it was a human, but it’s possessed by a demon.”

“Shit,” Matt said. “Can you heal them?”

I steeled myself and placed a hand on the man’s forehead as if I were checking for fever and closed my eyes. I couldn’t sense any vestige of the human. I opened my eyes and pulled back, shaking my head regretfully. “The human is gone. The demon is the only thing keeping the body alive.”

“The problem is he ran out in front of you deliberately. I can only think of one reason for that at the moment.” It was like demonic life support but the patient was dead.

“Did it really think it could stop us and hurt us? What was the point of that?”

In the distance, I heard a siren.

Matt’s head lifted. “That. To die for his cause. It’s a set up.”

I was slow to absorb what he said. “What do you mean?”

“Getting you convicted of vehicular manslaughter, or worse, would put you out of commission just about as neatly as if you weren’t on this plane of existence at all.”

Shit. “Okay.” I counted to ten in an effort to center myself. As I reached down to put my hands on the demon again, it snarled. It had to have heard us, known I was going to attempt to heal it, but the body it inhabited was too broken to even attempt to ward me off or get away.

I placed one palm over its forehead, the other over its heart. I tried to imagine it whole and healthy, but the impressions of the screaming souls made it hard to concentrate. I felt their pain. My body vibrated with it. Through gritted teeth, I said, “May God bless you and make you whole.”

The demon screamed, a high-pitched keening, and I yanked my hands back as it began to burn under my touch. I fell back on my ass and looked at the demon, its head lolling to the side.

“It’s definitely dead now,” I gasped out.

Matt hauled me to my feet.

I contemplated the body. How far away were the cops? “What do we do? Throw the body off the road? Put it in the trunk? Just leave it? The guy might have a family who deserves closure no matter what possessed him.”

Matt pulled out his cell phone. “I don’t think we have a choice. We have to play through whatever they set up. We don’t know what the police have been told already, but we at least have some control of the situation. Just tell the truth. We came around the corner, and he walked in front of the car. We don’t know why.” He clicked a few pictures with his phone, then dialed 911. “Hello? I’d like to report an accident.”

We stood off to the side of the road as we waited for the police, keeping an eye on the body. Not one other car drove by, but that wasn’t unusual out on the dirt roads where I lived. It didn’t take long. A black and white arrived with lights flashing. It had to have been the sirens we heard.

An ambulance arrived soon after, and the body was carted off to the hospital. Another police car arrived. Matt and I were separated. The door to the car I was put in opened, and a uniformed officer asked me to take a breathalyzer test. I didn’t see any reason not to.

A Detective Darkov came over to speak to me. She was short and wiry with long, blonde hair, wrapped tightly at the base of her neck. “I’m afraid your car will have to be impounded, ma’am.” She had a penetrating gaze, as if she were trying to ferret out my last secret. I had a feeling she was puzzling over me. Maybe I wasn’t wringing my hands enough or something. I found it hard to regret an accident I didn’t believe was my fault. “We’re going to take you downtown to ask some questions, try to figure out how this accident happened.”

Without touching her, I didn’t know whether I could trust her or not, so I simply acquiesced. I felt drained. It had been a long day.

At the station, they put us in separate rooms. Detective Darkov sat next to another Detective, Samson, who sat directly across from me. He was tall and angular with a bulbous nose and oddly shaped ears, his light brown hair buzz cut.

“Did you know the deceased before the accident?” he asked.

I blinked. “I still don’t know his name. I didn’t recognize him.”

“So that’s a no?”

“Correct,” I replied.

He noted something down on his paper.

“How fast were you driving?”

“I couldn’t really say. I never drive more than forty-five miles per hour out there, I think I was going the normal speed.” I may have been doing a bit more, but it really had nothing to do with that demon running out in front of me.

“Had you recently taken any alcohol or drugs of any kind?”

“No,” I said indignantly.

“Tell us what happened.”

I shrugged. “I came around the corner, and he ran right out in front of us.”

“A prominent businessman in the community, well-liked and respected, running for mayor in the fall, a beautiful wife and two intelligent children, and he runs out in front of your car? Can you explain why he would do such a thing?”

“Maybe he was being chased by a bear?” I suggested.

Detective Samson slammed his hand down. “Or maybe you just didn’t like his politics.”

Geez. “I don’t even know what his politics were,” I retorted.

“Don’t pretend you didn’t know he was the Republican candidate for mayor. The local nature club you’re a part of has vehemently opposed his platform of building a new shopping mall on the outskirts of town because there are blue heron nests in the trees near there.”

“Oh, come on,” I said, looking from Detective Samson to Detective Darkov. She just watched me impassively while her partner verbally attacked, with extreme prejudice. “I’m a member because I do bird rehabilitation, but I’ve never even been to a meeting.”

“Who was driving?” Detective Darkov spoke up, asking her first question.

“I was,” I said without hesitation. Had Matt said differently? I’d do anything for you, he had said. He’d also said to stick to the truth. He wouldn’t just lie. Or would he if he thought I’d be in danger in jail? I started to feel a little worried. Was I being railroaded?

I addressed Detective Darkov. She seemed the more reasonable of the two. “Look, this was just an accident. The guy walked out in front of my car, and it was too late for me to avoid him.”

“How could it have been reported before the accident even occurred?” Detective Darkov asked.

Good question. “What was a man in a business suit doing out there in the road?” I countered.

Detective Samson picked up that one. “He was changing a tire on his car. He’d pulled it as far off the side of the road as he could. That’s why you didn’t see it when you were speeding through the area.”

“I was not speeding when he walked out in front of me. I never drive more than five miles over the speed limit.”

“Which was it, did he run or walk?” Samson barked triumphantly, as if he’d just scored a point.

I saw misgiving flicker across Darkov’s face as she regarded her partner, as if she were wondering what was going on with him.

“Let’s give her some time to collect herself,” Darkov said. “Can I get you some coffee?” she offered.

I nodded, not sure if this was an example of good cop, bad cop. “Thanks.”

They walked out of the room, and I was left alone. I leaned forward to rest my head on my arms. It felt like forever since I’d woken up that morning. I couldn’t wait to get home, hopefully with Matt.

I had a longer wait than I thought.

Five minutes later, Detective Darkov returned. “Ms. Allyson Reynolds, you are being arrested for vehicular manslaughter in the death of Jason Strange.”

I gaped at her in disbelief as she read me the Miranda rights. This couldn’t be happening, but it was.

* * *

The next day a lawyer arrived, bright and early. He was short, thin, and balding on top, and he wore a simple polyester three-piece suit. His light blue eyes were filled with kindness, and he held out his hand as we met in the interrogation room. I took it and had an impression of running and laughing with a little girl, hair the color of sunshine.

I smiled. “Thank you for coming.”

He bobbed his head and gestured to the table. “Let’s sit down. Ms. Reynolds, they have a very strong circumstantial case against you, I’m not going to lie, but Mr. Blake is quite positive of your innocence. Rest assured, I will defend you whether you are innocent or guilty; however, I do need to ask —did you intend to hit the deceased with your car? It will affect my recommendations to you on how to proceed.”

I could be offended by the very question, but I knew better. I liked his approach. “I did not hit him on purpose. I came around the curve, and he literally ran out in front of my car.”

The lawyer nodded. “I already went out and saw the scene. It’s clear there was very little time for you to see the man when you came around the curve. I can also tell from the scene photos you tried to stop.” His brow furrowed. “I honestly don’t understand why they’re pursuing this. Any judge in his right mind will throw it out. If it comes to trial, there will be a whole jury of people they would have to convince. They can’t possibly think they’ll win.”

All of that sounded good, though it hinged on people being in their right mind, not either possessed by demons or actual demons in human form. I could see very easily how this could go bad.

Best to let the lawyer concentrate on the case. “What was he doing out there anyway, a businessman in a suit?”

“I’m told he had been to check out property he was considering purchasing to build a house, they didn’t say exactly where. It doesn’t much matter. I would recommend we go ahead and plead not guilty at the hearing on Friday, that’ll be at nine a.m., and see where we go from there. With any luck, the judge will throw it out, and you’ll be home eating dinner Friday night.”

“Sounds good to me.” I wasn’t holding my breath. Something else was going on. They had a plan, or they wouldn’t have sacrificed one of their own to get me inside a jail. It was a fairly small jail though there was only one other person in there at the moment, so we had our own cells.

The lawyer left, and a guard escorted me back to my cell. It was an average jail cell with room for two people, bunks to either side and about five feet in between them. The blankets on the beds were a rough, navy wool, and I briefly wondered about bed bugs, but I couldn’t stand around all day. I’d been allowed a book from a little collection they had, so I sat down on the bed with my back to the wall and flipped it open. It was a Chuck Wendig book. I’d never heard of him, but the title was The Cormorant. It seemed the obvious choice.

After a minute, I realized I wasn’t alone. I looked up from the book to find Zyriel lying on the other bunk, propped up on one elbow, watching me read. He was wearing old-fashioned striped prison jammies. I couldn’t help a smirk.

“Got yourself in a little jam, haven’t you, my darling Merry?” he asked in that sexy, soft voice of his.

I focused on my book. I figured the prison guards were keeping a watch on the cells with cameras, but I doubted there was sound attached. I didn’t want to chance seeming crazy, and I highly doubted any video would show Zyriel on the next bunk. Hell, I doubted anyone walking by would see him. I kept my voice low. “Please, if we’re going to keep meeting this way, call me Ally.”

He chuckled.

There was something about him I couldn’t stay angry at. He was like a grown-up child. My tastes had definitely matured if he was what I had enjoyed in my angel days.

“Have you thought any more about my offer?” he asked.

“Not really. I don’t really think you’re serious, but to be clear, no, thank you.”

“Oh, sweetheart, now think about it. I could take you away from all this.” He waved his hand around at the gray jail cell.

I looked over at him from the corner of my eye and wanted to laugh. “How were we ever lovers?”

“Oh, darling.” Suddenly he was naked. “When I think about how you used to…” He grinned at me.

I shook my head and looked back down at my book. Not interested.

“Come play with me, Merry,” he said in a singsong voice.

My head shot up as he struck a memory. Come play with me, Merry. He would say it and whisk me off and, oh, the ways he would play with me and encourage me to play with him. I had learned a lot. I smiled. I couldn’t wait to teach some of the things I’d learned to Matt.

“You do remember,” he accused.

I arched an eyebrow.

His smile faded. “It doesn’t matter, does it?” His clothes were suddenly back, no longer the stripes of the prison uniform, but rather jeans and a blue button-down shirt. He sat up and leaned forward, elbows on knees. “Oh, you’ve got yourself in a hell of a fix, kid. You do understand that, don’t you?”

I blinked. I did, but there was little I could do about it.

He sighed. “Watch your back. And your front.” He stood up, walked over, leaned down, and kissed my cheek. Then he was gone.

I could not understand how someone like him had thrown his lot in with the rest of the fallen angels. There was no ill intent, just foolish desires, and lack of forethought. I’d experienced my own fair share of those.

I read a little of my book, and lunch arrived on a tray. I supposed there was no cafeteria for such a small jail.

Later that day, a tall, thin, balding guard came to my cell and unlocked it. “You have a visitor.”

“Another one?”

“Lawyer doesn’t count as a visitor.”

“Okay.” Who would be visiting me? Zyriel had already been there, unless he had baked me a cake with a file in it, and I didn’t think that worked in real life.

The stony-faced guard led me down the hall to an interrogation room. Inside, Matt sat on the far side of a gray table. He didn’t get up. The guard led me to a chair on the opposite side of the table. “Keep your hands to yourself, no touching, no kissing, and someone may be listening in at any time. He is not your lawyer, so attorney-client privilege does not apply.”

Good to know.

I sat down and tried to smile across the table at Matt. I could tell by the look on his face it didn’t come off.

“How are you doing?” he asked quietly. He put his hands on the table, flat, though still a good five inches away from mine.

We weren’t touching, but I swear I could feel the energy of his body, moving out to touch mine. This time my smile was real. “I’m okay.”

“Good.”

“Thanks for calling the lawyer.”

“Of course, I’m here to help you in any way I can. That’s what partners are for. Do you want me to call your mother?”

I shook my head decisively. There was no point. She was barely a peripheral part of my life, dutiful visits on holidays and birthdays. It would be better if we could sort this out. She never had to know.

“The lawyer seems to think he’ll have me out of here in no time. There’s not a lot of evidence to suggest I did it on purpose. He said he didn’t understand why they were pursuing the case, and a judge will probably throw it out. If he doesn’t, there’s no way a jury would convict me.”

Matt nodded vigorously, as if trying to convince himself and me. “That’s good. Did he say when the hearing is scheduled for?”

“Friday at 9 a.m.”

Matt nodded again. “Two days.”

Nervous energy rolled off him like a cold breeze. I tried to console him. “Yeah, it’s only two days.”

“That’s a long time in jail.”

I scoffed. “I think I can last two days on hard tack and sleeping on a rack, Captain.”

One side of his mouth turned up, but the chill I felt hitting my hands said he wasn’t relieved. I opened my mouth to tell him what Zyriel had said, then shut it as I thought of the people who might be listening and how Matt had reacted to his presence before. “Are you worried about something happening in here?” I finally asked.

He looked at me, his face stony. “Maybe they aren’t worried about it getting to trial. Maybe they’re anticipating an accident in the very near future, inside the jail. You might be able to handle a demon on your own, but a human with murderous intent might be another story altogether.”

He seemed miserable at not being able to protect me. I wished fervently I could touch him, and felt a little jolt escape my fingers though there was no visible discharge.

He stiffened momentarily. “Don’t be wasting your energy on me.”

I smiled ruefully. “Didn’t even do it on purpose.”

He grinned. “I have a feeling you have more talents than we’ve uncovered as yet.”

I sighed. “I wish I hadn’t started the car yesterday on the dirt road. We could have stayed right where we were, and maybe nothing would have ever happened.”

He started to reach out as if to take my hands but stopped himself in time. “Hey, now. I promise we’re going to have more time together soon, and it won’t be in the front seat of a car. I’m not a teenager.”

I laughed. “Okay, I’ll hold you to that.”

He sat back, breaking our connection. Suddenly I felt bereft and wanted to cry.

“I’ve got a few things I’m working on. I’d better get back to it. I’ll be seeing you very, very soon,” he said.

His eyes bore into mine. I just wanted desperately to be on the same side of the table with him, in his arms. “I love you,” he said.

I heard the last part in my head: More than anyone else, ever. I would do anything for you.

My eyes narrowed. “Just don’t do anything crazy.”

He grinned and got up. The door opened almost immediately, and the guard let him out, then escorted me back to my cell. “You might be getting a roommate in a little bit. Brought a woman in and we don’t have enough room.”

Something set alarm bells off in my head. “I see.” Watch your back and your front, Zyriel had said. It might be a really long night, after all.